hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
Grandma got run over by a raindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there`s no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
She`d been drinkin` too much egg nog,
And we`d begged her not to go,
But she`d left her medication,
So she stumbled out the door into the snow.
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
When they found her Christmas mornin`,
At the scene of attack.
There were hoof prints on her forehead,
And incriminatin` claus marks on her back.
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
Grandma got run over by a raindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there`s no such thing as santa,
But as for me and Grandpa we believe
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
Now were all so proud of Grandpa,
He`s been taken` this so well,
Drinkin` beer and playin` cards with cousin Belle,
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
Its not Christmas without Grandma,
All the family`s dressed in black.
And we just can`t help but wonder;
should we open up her gifts or send them back?
hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho
Grandma got run over by a raindeer,
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there`s no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
Now the goose is on the table,
and the pudding made of pie.
And a blue and silver candle,
That would just have, matched the hair in
Grandmas`wig.
I,ve warned all my friends and neighbors
"Better watch out for yourselves."
They should never give a license,
To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves.
Grandma got ran over by a raindeer,
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there`s no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
It was the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode Only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
While visions of Nintendo 64 and Barbie, flipped through their heads.
The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
With a half-constructed bicycle on his knee. So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter, Which made her sigh, "Now what's the matter?" With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand, She descended the stairs, and saw the old man. He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug.
"Oh great," muttered the mom, "Now I have to clean the rug."
"Ho-ho-ho!" cried Santa, "I'm glad you're awake." "Your gift was especially difficult to make." "Thanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone." "Exactly!" he chuckled, "I've made you a clone." "A clone?" she asked, "What good is that? Run along, Santa, I've no time for chit-chat." The mother's twin. Same hair, same eyes, She'll cook, she'll dust. She also is wise. She'll mop every mess with a wink and a snap You can watch the soaps & perhaps take a nap "My dream come true! "I'll read., I'll shop! I'll talk on the phone & never stop.
From the room above, the youngest began to fret. "Mommy?! I'm scared, I'm cold and I 'm wet." The clone replied, "I'm coming, sweetheart." "Hey," the mom smiled, "She knows her part." The clone changed the small one, and hummed a tune, as she bundled the child, in a blanket cocoon. "You the best mommy ever. I really love you." The clone smiled and sighed, "I love you, too." The mom frowned and said, "Sorry, Santa, no deal." That's my child's love, she's trying to steal." Smiling wisely Santa said, "To me it is clear, " Only one loving mother, is needed here." The mom kissed her child, and tucked her into bed. "Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head. I sometimes forget, it won't be very long, When they'll be too old, for my cradle-song." The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, "It works every time." With the clone by his side Santa said, "Goodnight. Merry Christmas, Mom, You'll be all right."
Just Click me and ole Rudolf and Home we go
TIAS