Friends Don't Let Friends Drive With Cod in Their Trousers

members.tripod.com/~angumbdo/codtrousers.html

There I was, happily watching M*A*S*H and eating cashews when suddenly I remembered I need to write my Personal Statement for the UC application, apply for some scholarships and get a couple letters of recomendation, study for Psychology and Government, and write an Othello essay! So I jumped up, got on my computer, and wrote this newsletter because I really don't feel like doing any of that other stuff right now.

I realize I haven't written one of these for a while, but I do have a good excuse. See, I was walking home from school last week when this green beam beam of light suddenly stabbed out of the sky right in front of me and... Ok, ok, I don't have a good excuse, but it really wasn't my fault: I've been using up all my creative energies bsing Newsletter-esque essays for my Government class. For example, a couple weeks ago we get a test with two short answer questions and an essay on Chapter 1, which I'd been too, uh, busy to actually [ahem] read. So, after comparing my parents to fascism for the first two questions I got to the essay part. I don't remember the exact wording of the question, but it was something to the effect of: "Explain how the four types of political elitism would or would not be effective in a democracy." My opening sentence was "Well, seeing as how I have no idea as to what the four types of political elitism are, I guess I'm just gonna have to wing this mother", and the essay was downhill from there. The really funny part is that I actually got a passing grade on that test! So anyway, what with writing that kind of stuff for government essays and current event papers and all I haven't really had to let off any weirdness in a newsletter. Ok, enough about me, now on to actual FDLFDWCTT issues!

Just kidding, I'm gonna put in some more personal stuff, so there! I also incorporated a newsletter-quality (oxymoron?) metaphor into an essay for English class, but we don't do enough writing in there for me to do any serious bsing. Ok, now I'll put in some issues.

First off, We got a message in the student bulletin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We kick [donkey]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They spelled it FOLFOWCTT, but that's not important!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They also spelled the internet address with a "tronsers", but that's not important either!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What's important is that we got a message in the student bulletin!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It said, or was supposed to say "Attention Freshman through Seniors, The FDLFDWCTT is now accepting new members! To join just go to mr. arellano's or ms. boyen's classroom and pick up a membership cod, or visit our web empire at [I don't feel like writing the address now, so just imagine it's here. Ok, stop imagining r.i..g...h....t NOW!]. Remember, Save a cod; Save a life." Doesn't that kick [donkey]??!!!??!!?!?!?! My enlish teacher said, and I quote, "Uh." Of course he says that all the time, but it might have meant something. Now that we can get messages out to the student body at large we're gonna have a meeting and announce it so we might actually have people attend

I just realized that I sent out the newsletter before it was finished, so if you read it you'll have to die. Or I suppose I could just send out the finished version and you could pretend you never read the first one. Your choice. By the way, if you'd prefer the second option please send me a copy of the first version, cause I don't seem to have one on my computer. Thanks.
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