~"tragic"~

It wasn't until Justin and Keryn had taken Kayla to Justin's room and put her in bed that the full story came out. After the shock of the news Kayla had become dazed, she wouldn't talk to either of them so they had decided to let her sleep. They knew that when she woke up she would blame herself. It was all a mess. According to Justin, Daniel on return from Tulsa, had threatened him many times and was thrown off UCLA campus twice. He was so angry with being rejected that he blamed it on the person in the middle, Justin. Then everything died down, Justin heard nothing about Daniel and assumed he had crawled into some hole where he belonged. In reality Justin had restored to drugs again and OD-ed. As soon as Justin knew he had rung Keryn.

The two sat on Justin's floor sipping strong coffee and talking about Dan. Although they weren't crying they did feel sad to a point. Sure he had been a bastard but he had still been part of their lives, and he was only 18. It was amazing that through their immense hatred of him, both Keryn and Justin could find something nice to say, and it all had to do with Kayla.

"Remember the time that we had that movie marathon and he cooked curry at 4 in the morning?" Keryn asked. .

"Yeah..that was fun." Justin showed a hint of a smile. "Almost as funny as that time he almost beat up my opponent in that tennis match a few years back" .

"I remember that…that was the first time..the first time he ever hit anyone around Kayla." .

"Yeah." .

The silence was deafening. .

"She always seemed to be able to calm him down, it was like they came as a unit." Started Keryn. .

"I guess that when she found Ike, everything feel apart for him." .

"I guess." Keryn looked into the air, "You know, now I sorta feel sorry for him." .

"I know, I do too." .

Together they sat as images of the Dan that once was went flying through their minds. The Dan that existed before the drug habit, before the abuse, before everything fell apart. He had been so nice and the four of them, the misfits, had fitted together so well. Age didn't separate them. Justin was now 21, Keryn coming onto 18, Daniel was 18 and Kayla was almost 16. They came together through unusual circumstances, Daniel and Kayla through the death of her brother, Keryn and Justin through their families, and then when Keryn and Kayla had met each other through stuff at school they had become a group, before everything fell apart. Now they sat, will a great loss, and no clear way to move forward.

They heard Kayla coming down the hall. No-one said anything and Kayla just sat down next to Keryn and blending into their silence. .

"You know, none of this was suppose to happen," begun Kayla, " my beloved cousin Mauro wasn't suppose to die, I wasn't suppose to have followed Dan all the way over here. This all wasn't supposed to happen. Aren't rich kids suppose to leave sheltered lives? Well if so how come before I'm sixteen the 2 people I loved most died? Was that suppose to happen? Is that fair?" .

"No its not fair." Said Keryn quietly.

"Exactly, but it happened……what do I do now?" .

It was Justin's turn, "Kayla you have to remember that you were planning to go on with life without Dan before this happened, you had already made plans to move away from it all, you have Ike now." .

"Justin how the hell is Ike suppose to understand?" .

"Kayla, you know he would do anything for you, even if he doesn't understand he will try his hardest, we all will." Keryn said. .

"I know I know, but this was Dan, an as inconstant as he is he was the most constant thing in my life..that's how screwed up this is." .

She lay back against the couch. The other two watched, not knowing what to say, or if they should fill the silence. .

"Call him." Stated Keryn

"What?"

"Call him," she got up and walked towards the phone, "you have to tell Ike, out of all of us he is the one that by far cares the most about you and I guarantee you he is awake thinking of you now."

By now Keryn was at the phone, she began dialing.

"Keryn…what am I.."

Keryn cut it, "tell him what's happened, he'll know what to say, he's you boyfriend."

Kayla seemed to almost cringe at the mention of boyfriend.

"Okay."

She walked across the room and took the phone from Keryn, it was picked up on the first ring. An alert Ike answered.

"Kayla"

"….yes."

"What's wrong? What's happened?? Are you okay?"

Kayla could picture his eyebrows furrowing.

"I'm….Ike.." all of a sudden it hit her. She began crying. "He's dead Ike…he died."

"Who? Dan?"

"Yes..he was only 18!! Ike, nobody understands…I can't do this….I"

"listen to me, shhh, calm down for a second, take a deep breath and listen. I love you, you know I do, and you have to believe me when I say this. This isn't your fault. You don't hold any responsibility for somebody else, none at all.."

"But he did it cos I didn't want to be with him, if only had."

"Don't say that, if you hadnt left him where would you be now, you know you would be somewhere you didn't want to be. He dealt with this the wrong way and it turned out the worst way, but it is not your fault, you have to believe that."

"Why can't you be here Ike..Oh my God..I am so sorry I left without saying Goodbye…I didn't mean..it wasn't.."

"I understand….Kayla do you want me there? I can come."

Kayla thought for a second.

"No, leave me for a moment, I have to leave Dan behind before anything else. I don't want you to be near this….you understand?"

"I think so."

"But I still wish you were here with me."

"I know."

Kayla collapsed again and Keryn rescued the phone from her. Justin nursed Kayla and let her cry. He had never looked at her life in a whole package, it was screwed up, the only 'normal' thing about it was the last 3 weeks. That too was now shattered. He hugged her closer.

Keryn whispered the details to Ike as she waved Justin out of the room, he left cradling Kayla. She was free to talk.

"Ike, it's awful, he OD-ed and when they found him there was a suicide note. But it was addressed to Kayla and in an envelope. They havent opened it. She doesn't know it yet but she is going to have to open it for them tomorrow."

"Why don't they just bloody well open it?"

"I don't know."

"Keryn, she told me not to come, but I have to…I need to.. I feel awful just staying here."

"No, she's right, she doesn't want you to mix with him or be associated with him, we have to respect that."

"I know but I feel so awful."

"It's what she wants."

"Okay, where are you?"

"Where at Justin's place, Kayla's sleeping in the bed."

Ike, although concerned about the tragedy was still thinking of his brothers heart.

"oh, and you and Justin?"

"We're on the couch….and I don't want to go into the details of our relationship at the moment."

Ike immediately knew that Taylor was out of the picture.

"Oh."

"I have to go take care of her, please try not to worry too much, she is fine, I'll send her back ASAP."

"Tell her I love her."

"She already knows but I'll tell her anyway."

"Take care of yourself to Keryn."

"I will, bye."

"Bye"



Ike let the phone drop. He closed his eyes and allowed his body to slide down the stark white painted wall. He didn't really know what was happening. . . he thought he was losing it. His parents in less than a week and he had to face his brothers until then. He had just blamed them for the whole thing. He had to apologise, or do something. His thoughts moved to Dan and a long sigh came out of his mouth. Ike was only eighteen. Dan was only eighteen. It is totally unbelievable. They were born in the same year. Both still had the rest of the lives to live. Now, nothing for Dan to continue. A life gone, a whole life. He thought about Kayla. How she would be dealing in this situation. When she woke up this morning she had no idea what would be happening that afternoon. And she didn't want Ike to go and see her, that hurt, but he understood that she wanted to be alone. He sighed again. This must be so hard for her.

Ike heard Taylor come waltzing down the corridor, somewhat happy.

"I see you spoke to lover-girl"

"Tay." Ike warned.

"Oh no. Something happened? Why did she leave." Ike's head fell back to looking at the floor. "Oh, Ike, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"No Tay. It's fine, in a way it sort of concerns us all."

"What is it Ike?"

"You remember Dan?"

"Of course I remember Dan." Taylor almost spat. Then he saw the look on Ike's face.

"She didn't go back to........."

"No Tay," Ike stopped him "she had to go back cause he died."

Taylor looked astonished. "What?"

"He killed himself Tay. He overdosed. Kayla is really broken up about it. They all are back there."

"All?"

"The families, Keryn, Kayl, Justin" Ike thought for a moment.

"Oh, Justin."

"Tay, they were all really close."

"I know. . . It was just that they all have that closeness."

"We had that closeness. Me, you, Keryn, Zac. Where did that go?"

"Take my word for it Taylor. It is so still there, you just can't see it at the moment. Justin is just a guy that was kind of there at the time. You know?"

"Yeah Ike. Whatever Ike."

"Tay, that's not the issue. No matter what, Dan died. That is so tragic."

"yeah, I know. How’s Kayla dealing with it?"

"Not good by the sounds of things."

"It must be so tough"

"It must be"

HR>

"I dont drink Jussy, you know that"

Kayla sat on the couch as Justin tried to convince her to take a sip of brandy.

"Kayla I know you dont drink but this will make you feel better"

"Nothing will make me feel better, especially not drink"

"Please Kayla….you are shaking so much."

"Okay..fine"

She took the glass and drank it fast. It burnt all the way down to her stomach. Her insides were on fire.

"The burning will stop, dont worry"

Kayla looked doubtfully at him.

"It will I promise..here give me the glass..you’ve stopped shaking at least"

"It’s killing, honestly….why the hell do you have that stuff anyway?"

"For times like these"

"It is evil….I feel like I just ate a shark."

"Want some more."

"NO!"

"Okay….well Kayla, what are we going to do?"

"I dont know. I wish Ike was here."

"Why didnt you invite him? We have room."

"I can’t, it would be so weird. I couldn’t have him where Dan was."

"I can understand that."

"It’s something we have to deal with, you, Keryn, and me. We were in this as a team. I just can’t believe it happened so suddenly."

"It did happen fast, but he had it coming for a long time, we could all see it."

"I know. I still wish that..that things could have been different"

"We all do."

At that moment Keryn walked in the door. She immediately walked over to Kayla and hugged her.

"He told me to tell you he loves you."

Kayla smiled.

"He’s as worried as hell you know. He is so worried."

"Keryn, I’ve only know him for less than a month."

"Dont tell me that, you love him just as much as he does you. Dont close up from him…you know you do that when your upset. He’s there for you, he wants to help."

Kayla but her lip and nodded.

"I know…Oh God guys I am being to selfish, Dan was your friend too. How are you."

Keryn and Justin looked at each other quickly.

"Well, Kayla too put it plainly I’m not going to miss him" Justin quipped. Kayla smiled and Justin relaxed, " He was too brute like, you were better off without him."

"Thats true, it’s not that I’m morning the Dan that died more the Dan that I was with in the beginning."

"Justin and I remember that Dan too, but he died a long time ago"

"I know, he died when Mauro died, it just took me too long to realize."

"It took all of us too long, we should have realized and helped him" Keryn said sadly.

"Yeah."

They all nodded in agreement.

"I’m tired, Jussy is it okay if I crash on your bed?"

"Yeah, go ahead."

"Thanks, night….well morning you guys."

"You too."

They watched as Kayla stumbled out of the room.

"Justin, thank god you are here. What would we do without you."

Justin took his eyes away from the door frame to focus on Keryn.

"You have to take her back soon, can she go to school there?"

"What? What are you on about?"

"She cant stay here, everything she looks at reminds her of him. She has to go back to Tulsa, it seems the only place she was happy."

"I cant take her back! Yes she was happy there but where would she stay I cant dump her on the Hanson’s. I can’t."

"Then where is she going to go?"

"Maybe we should call her parents?"

"Are you joking? She would kill us."

"Then she could go back to Australia."

"No, she has to stay here. She’ll make it."



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