I am starting a new club just for my kind of guys. Here is a list of things that will tell you if you are qualified for membership in the new GoodOleBoys Social Club. If you can answer yes to any of the following questions,email me and I'll send you a membership. It's free and you don't have to answer the questions honestly. Lying on the answers automatically qualifys you for membership.

1, Your truck is worth $30,000 and your house is worth $3000.

2, Your town ever had a combination Funeral Home-Game Room.

3, You have a sign that says, "TAKE MY WIFE OR KIDS, BUT DON'T TOUCH MY GUNS"

4, You've ever worn camouflage clothing to a wedding or a funeral.

5, If your charity wants to raise money, raffle off a shotgun.

5, You ever work at your computer in your underwear.

6, You ever work at your computer in your wife's underwear.

7, There's no school during deer season.

8, You have more money invested in coon dogs than in your house.

9. You have more e-mail addresses than teeth.

10, You take your laptop to a turkey shoot to try to impress your friends.

11, At least 1 curtain in your house is a rebel flag.

12, You have a refrigerator or a lazy-boy on your front porch.

13, You call your wife, "the old lady"

14, You think Safe Sex is making sure the emergency brake is on in your truck while you're having sex.

15, You bought yourself a $20,000 bass boat and your wife a new wringer washer.

16, You have ever bummed a rub of snuff off of your wife, girlfriend, or mother-in-law.

17, You ever told a girl, "we don't need a condom, I had the mumps."

18, You consider the third grade to have been the best four years of your life.

Comments and Suggestions

If you have any more ideas on qualifications, please e-mail them to me.

Back to Top

Current Projects

Presently Working On Process To Freeze Dry Roadkills
In Early Development of Combo, Gun, fishing rod and beer can holder
I am distributing birth control devices to an area rest home. These people should not be having kids at their ages.