There were two old boys from Alabama who loved to fish. They wanted to do some ice fishing that they'd heard about in Canada, so they took off to try it. The lake was frozen nicely, so they stopped just before they got to the lake at a little bait shop and got all their tackle. One of them said, "We're going to need an ice pick."
After they got their equipment, they took off. In about two hours, one of them was back at the shop and said, "We're going to need another dozen ice picks." He sold him the picks, and the old boy left.
In about an hour, he was back at the shop and said, "We're going to need all the ice picks you've got."
The bait man couldn't stand it any longer. "By the way," he asked, "how are you fellows doing?"
"Not very well at all," he said. "We don't even have the stupid boat in the water yet."
Two guys are fishing when one pulls up an old bottle. As he gets ready to throw it back in the water, a genie pops out and says, "You got me out of that stinky old bottle, now I have to grant you one wish."
The guy thinks about it for a minute then says "Okay, turn the lake into beer."
The genie grants the man's wish and disappears. The man then turns to his friend and says, "Well, what do you think of that?"
His friend replies "You stupid idiot! NOW WE HAVE TO PEE IN THE DAMN BOAT!"
Fishing Equipment
A couple went on vacation to a resort up north. The husband liked to fish, and the wife liked to read. One morning the husband came back from fishing after getting up real early that morning and took a nap.
While he slept, the wife decided to take the boat out. She was not familiar with the lake, so she rowed out and anchored the boat, and started reading her book.
Along comes the Game Warden in his boat, pulls up alongside the woman's boat and asks her what she's doing? She says, "Reading my book."
The Game Warden tells her she is in a restricted fishing area and she explains that she's not fishing. To which he replied, "But you have all this equipment. I will have to take you in and write you up!"
Angry that the warden was being so unreasonable, the lady told the warden, "If you do that, I will charge you with rape."
The warden, shocked by her statement, replied, "But I didn't even touch you."
To which the lady replied, "Yes; but you have all the equipment!"
A woman is in bed with her lover who also happens to be her husband's best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they're just laying there, the phone rings.
Since it is the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks over at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation...
(She is speaking in a cheery voice)
"Hello? Oh, hi. I'm so glad that you called. Really? That's wonderful. I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye bye." She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?"
"Oh" she replies, "that was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."
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