All I need to know about life I learned from my girl friends
For the 99.9% of us who are not models
ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE
"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." --John, age 9
"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't
want to do it. It takes too long." --Glenn, age 7
ON THE ROLE OF BEAUTY AND HANDSOMENESS IN LOVE
"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family,
it doesn't hurt to be beautiful." --Anita C., age 8
"It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like
anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet." --Brian, age 7
"Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time."
--Christine, age 9
REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE
"Love is the most important thing in the world but baseball is pretty
good too." --Greg, age 8
HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE?
"Mooshy ... like puppy dogs ... except puppy dogs don't wag their
tails nearly as much." --Arnold, age 10
"All of a sudden, the people get movie fever so they can sit together
in the dark." --Sherm, age 8
CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS
"They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid
good money for them." --Gavin, age 8
"They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the
aisle someday and do the holy matchimony thing." --John, age 9
CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE
"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is
on television." --Jill, age 6
"Love is foolish ... but I still might try it sometime." --Floyd, age 9
"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been
trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me."
--Dave Heiss, age 8
"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard
enough." --Regina, age 10
THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO BE A GOOD LOVER
"Sensitivity don't hurt." --Robbie, age 8
"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you
have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." --Ava, age 8
SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU
"Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores." --Del, age 6
"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs ...and don't
worry if their parents are right there." --Manuel, age 8
"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get
attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." --Alonzo, age 9
"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she
likes to eat. French fries usually works." --Bart, age 9
HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT
ARE IN LOVE?
"Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if
he's in love." --Bobby, age 9
"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get
cold... Other people care more about the food." --Bart, age 9
"Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just
wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up."
--Sarah, age 9
"See if the man has lipstick on his face." --Sandra, age 7
"It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They
like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are... on
fire." --Christine, age 9
MOST LOVING THINGS TO SAY TO SOMEONE
"'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'" --Arnold, age 10
"'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.'" --Larry, age 8
"'I Love Hamburgers; I Like You!'" Eddie, age 6
"'I Am in Love with You Most of the Time, but Don't Bother Me When I'm
with My Friends.'" --Bob, age 9
"'Hey, Baby, I Don't like Girls but I'm Willing to Forget You Are
One!'" --Will, age 7
WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU"
"The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he
showers at least once a day." --Michelle, age 9
"Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad they finally got
it out and said it and now they can go eat." --Dick, age 7
HOW WAS KISSING INVENTED?
"I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm
all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplace or even
stoves in their houses." --Gina, age 8
HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS
"You can have a big rehearsal with your Barbie and Ken dolls." --Julia, age 7
"You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best
of you." --Brian, age 7
"It might help to watch soap operas all day." --Carin, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
"When they're rich." --Pam, age 7
"It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you ...
That's why I stopped doing it." --Tammy, age 10
"If it's your mother, you can kiss her anytime. But if it's a new
person, you have to ask permission." --Roger, age 6
HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE
"Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work." --Dick, age 7
"Don't forget your wife's name; that will mess up the love." --Erin, age 8
"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take
out the trash." --Dave, age 8
"Don't say you love somebody and then change your mind ... Love isn't
like picking what movie you want to watch." --Natalie, age 8
But life is about who you love and who you hurt.
It's about who you make happy or unhappy purposefully.
It's about keeping or betraying trust.
It's about friendship, used as a sanctity or a weapon.
It's about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful, maybe heartening.
About starting rumors and contributing to petty gossip.
It's about what judgments you pass and why. And who your judgments are spread to.
It's about who you've ignored with full control and intention.
It's about jealousy, fear, ignorance, and revenge.
It's about carrying inner hate and love, letting it grow, and spreading it.
But most of all, it's about using your life to touch or poison other people's hearts in such a
way that could have never occurred alone.
Only you choose the way those hearts are affected, and those choices are what life's all
about.
*If shop mannequins were real women THEY'D BE TOO THIN TO MENSTRUATE.
*There are 3 billion women who don't look like supermodels and
ONLY 8 WHO DO.
*Marilyn Monroe wore a SIZE 12.
*If Barbie were a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due
to her proportions.
*The average American woman weighs 144 lbs. and wears between a
size 12 and 14.
*One out of every 4 college aged women has an eating disorder.
*The models in the magazines are airbrushed-THEY'RE NOT PERFECT!!
*A psychological study in 1995 found that 3 minutes spent looking
at models in a fashion magazine caused 70% of women to feel depressed,
guilty and shameful.
*Models who twenty years ago weighed 8% less than the average
woman, today weigh 23% less.
This is the Magical Grapefruit of Love. It has been bequeathed upon you by someone who thinks you are really cool. This person might be your boyfriend, girlfriend, lover, pal, homie, Hausfrau, neighbor or someone else you don't even know. This person finds you rather interesting, possibly even attractive, and just generally thinks you're a pretty good excuse to be alive. Whether this person actually IS attracted to you is another question. This is merely a token of affection for you to wonder at and appreciate. The proper response, upon receipt of the Magical Grapefruit of Love is a hug, or a message of thanks, if this person is too far away to hug within a week of receipt. Basically, the Magical Grapefruit of Love is a way to say "Hey, you're really darn cool, and I want you to know that." Sorry if you were disappointed that there is no actual citrus fruit contained in this letter. Unfortunately, at the time of writing, that miracle of science that allows grapefruit to travel through telephone lines had not been perfected. But be consoled by the fact that someone thinks you're really a rockin' guy/gal, and would most likely help you out if you had a flat tire somewhere in the same state (or within a one or two hour radius, depending on the size of your state). The sender of the Magical Grapefruit of Love only asks one thing of you-- (besides the aforementioned hug) that you bequeath this Grapefruit of Love on someone else. The Magical Grapefruit of Love grows in power as it is shared, and someday you may receive this Magical Citrus Entity again. Send it on. Remember the elation you felt the first time you received it? If you send it on, you may feel this again. This is not a chain letter. Nothing bad will happen to you if you don't send it on, but think of the bright spot it might put in the day of someone you think is extra groovy.
There's something in a simple hug
That always warms the heart;
It welcomes us back home
And makes it easier to part.
A hug's a way to share the joy
And sad times we go through.
Or just a way for friends to say
They like you 'cause you're you.
Hugs are meant for anyone
For whom we really care,
From your grandma to your neighbor,
Or a cuddly teddy bear.
A hug is an amazing thing -
It's just the perfect way to say.
It's funny how a little hug
Makes everyone feel good;
In every place and language,
It's always understood.
And hugs don't need new equipment,
Special batteries or parts -
Just open up your arms
And open up your hearts.