Batty Shits In Mom's Office

My mom hates it
When she sees her cat shit
In her office
Batty is a cat
He is never fat
Because he squeezes it out
In my mom's office

Brown piles here
Big lumps there
He never used
The litter box

Batty's always been weird
He watches TV
He licks his girlfriend Sassy
And he shits in my mom's office
Batty shits in Mom's office

Brown piles here
Big lumps there
He never used
The litter box

Batty shits in Mom's office . . .

Sometimes he barfs in Mom's office
(But usually)
Batty shits in Mom's office . . .


("copywrite" 1990)

Pretty Human Words

Don't say "meow"
Don't say "oink"
Don't say "buck"
Don't say "ruff"

Say something human
Something pretty

Pretty human words

Don't say "kcuf"
Don't say "tihs"
Don't say "ssa"
Don't say "hctib"

Even though it's in human
Say something pretty

Pretty human words
Pretty human words

Don't be stupid
Use some understandable verbs

I don't care if you bark like a dog
Meow like a cat
Oink like a pig
Or even buck like a chicken
I just don't care anymore
Just don't say anything bad
You don't want a low vocabulary

Pretty human words
Pretty human words


("copywrite" 1990)