Being Physically, Sexually or Emotionally abused?

Safety Plan (NZ Version)

Suggestions for increasing safety - In the relationship.

*I will have important phone numbers available to my children and myself. These are:

*I can tell ___________ and _____________about the violence and ask them to call the police if they hear suspicious noises coming from my home.

*If I leave my home, I can go (list four places):

1. ___________________________

2. ___________________________

3. ___________________________

4. ___________________________

*I can leave extra money, car keys,clothes,and copies of documents with _________________________

*If I leave, I need to bring __________________________(see checklist below).

*To ensure safety and independence, I can:

A) Keep change for phone calls with me at all times.

B) Open my own savings account

C) Rehearse my escape route with a support person

D) Review safety plan on _________________(date).

*If I am talking with support people or organisations I will clear the redial feature on my phone by pressing zero after any call I make, while the handset is out of the cradle.

*I will make all such calls from a public phone if he is likely to check phone bills.

*I will not tell marginal people (those that support my partner, or make excuses for him) about this safety plan.

Suggestions for increasing safety when the relationship is over. (This is, statistically, the most dangerous time for women)

*I will apply for interim custody/custody of my children.

*I can:

change the locks.

install steel/metal doors.

install window locks.

install a security system.

install smoke detectors.

put in an outside lighting system.

*I will inform _____________and ________________ that my partner no longer lives with me and ask them to call the police if he is observed near my home or my children.

*I will tell people who take care of my children the names of those who have permission to pick them up.

The people who have permission are:

1. _____________________________

2. _____________________________

3. _____________________________

(No more than three people as this causes confusion. If an extreme emergency occurs I will work through the police. Using notes to allow others to pick up my child/ren can result in confusion for teachers or carers.

*The people or organisations that need to know are:

1. Schools

2. Day Care or Pre School

3. Doctors

4. Clubs such as Cubs Scouts Guides etc.

5. Ministers or Sunday School Teachers

6. Parents of friends

7. Police

When dealing with these people I will show custody papers, this will get me better cooperation and stop the authorities thinking in terms of allowing my partner access or custody of my children, without due process.

*I can tell _____________at work about my situation and ask _____________ to screen my calls.

*I will buy an answerphone and screen all calls through it. (If he knows where I am)

If my partner doesn't know where I am, I will get someone else to record the message and I won't mention names that my partner would recognise.

*I can avoid stores, banks, and _______________that I used when living with my battering partner.

*I will personally change the address of all correspondence, preferably to a P.O. Box. or my legal representative.

*If I am in hiding I will not use credit cards that he will get the bill for.

*I will not contact him or his friends direct, in fact I will keep the number of people who know where I am and what I am planning to do to a minimum.

*I can obtain a non-molestation, or non-violence order from the Family Court.

*I will keep it on or near me at all times as well as leave a copy with _______________.

*If I feel down and ready to return to a potentially abusive situation , I can call ____________________for support or attend workshops and support groups to gain support and strengthen my relationships with other people.

Important Phone Numbers

Police __________________________________________

Refuge __________________________________________

Friends __________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________

Counsellor ______________________________________

Items to Take Checklist

*Identification

*Birth certificates for me and my children

*Social Welfare and Health cards

*School and medical records

*Money, bankbooks, credit cards

*Keys - house/car/office

*Driver's license and registration

*Medications and personal items

*Changes of clothes for you and children

*Passport(s),work permits, visa's