Unknown voice: ACHOO!

Yet Another Unknown Voice: Bless you.

Different Unknown voice: ACHOO!

YAUV: Gesundheit.

Fourth Unknown Voice: ACHOO!

YAUV: God bless you...

Fifth Unknown Voice: ACHOO!

YAUV: I'M NOT SAYING IT AGAIN!!!

Orion: Gee, someone *cough cough* has their panties in a knot...

Mercy: What did you say!?!

Orion: *cough* NO! *cough hack* I wasn't talking *wheeze* about you!

Mercy: Good. Here's your orange juice.

Seth: Hey! *sniffle* Why can't I get some tender loving care over here?

Nyx: [throws a pillow at him] Shut up! You're the one who started it!

Anaera: Yeah... first you get sick... then Eurydice got sick around the same time... then BAM all the Guardians are sick!

Eurydice: Don't *sniff* blabe it all od hib...

Anaera: Oh yeah, I forgot... you're the other half of the raging hormones.

P-kun: Hormones... artificial vitamins... someone, GIVE ME MY NYQUIL, WENCH!!!

Meredith: Uh-oh, looks like the fever went back up.

Remy: I am *not* dipping him in the cold bath this time.

P-kun: A HORSE, A HORSE! MY KINGDOM FOR A HORSE! *cough, cough*

[bell rings]

Celly: Now what, Dion??

Dion: Um... [pitiful voice] I need a hug...

Celly: Aww... poor baby! [hugs him]

Susanne: You know, if you wouldn't baby him so much, he wouldn't constantly be ringing that damn bell.

Roger: The ringing's getting worse! *sniff, sniff* The ringing! Suze, make it stop!

Susanne: Wuss. Here. [hands him a glass of water and a couple pills]

Kell: [snaps fingers] Yo! A little attention here? Please?

Kristsi: Don't snap your fingers at me! I'm not your mother!

Kell: That's for sure. Well, I said please!

[the two degenerate to useless squabbling the camera pans to Zeke, who is lying huddled under a mound of blankets, snoring]

Zeke: *snooooore* *hack hack cough* *snooooooore* *sniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiifffffffff*

Everyone else in the room: Eeeeeewwwwwwww...

Susanne: Meredith, can't you do something about that?

Meredith: Well, I couldn't get a hold of Doctor Kevorkian...

Nyx: Interesting concept. That'll really end his suffering. Well, did you give him Nyquil?

Meredith: Why do you think he's asleep? I'm afraid to give him any more!

Anaera: HEY! Hey, you two! Opposite sides of the room! OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE ROOM!!!

Nyx: You mean they're at it again?! This is what started the whole thing in the first place!!!

Roger: [whining] Keep it down! Keep it down! Have you no pity?

Susanne: Poor baby... [starts rubbing his shoulders]

P-kun: I PLAYED OPHELIA AT CAMBRIDGE!!!

Remy: On no... not again... [picks up a bucket of ice and a towel]

Mercy: [pissed off tone] Do you want anything else? Say no. Say NO.

Orion: [trembling] Uhmmm.... uhmmm... *cough cough*

Mercy: Well? What is it? [Orion pulls her down and whispers in her ear. Her eyebrows go up in shock and she pulls away]

Mercy: I told you that you had too much orange juice! [Orion just trembles under the covers]

Dion: [fumbling with the remote] Oh hey! *wheeze* The game!

[Roger, Orion, and Kell all perk up and face the TV]

P-kun: I SAY TO THEE, TURN BACK TO BALLET... YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELT OF ELDERBERRIES!!!

Kell: No! *hack* Hell no! No more ballet! Wussy girlie stuff!

Eurydice: C'mon, we were watching that! Achoo!

Seth: Hey, if the lady wants to watch, let her watch!

Orion: Yeah, show us the lady first!

Eurydice: [threatening] Do you want to make it to the bathroom alive?

Celly: Why don't we watch something that everyone will enjoy?

[silence]

Seth: Porn?

Nyx: You *can* be killed, you know... [holds out her gun]

Celly: [surfing channels] A game show?

Minna: NO!

Celly: Jerry Springer?

Minna: NO!

Mercy: How about some soaps?

[everyone glares at her]

Susanne: What's on VH-1?

Anaera: No... is there anything good on Sci-Fi?

Dion: [grabs remote away, turns to CNN, and throws the remote out the window] At least this way *cough cough* we'll be able to see what the score is...

Celly: That's my smart boy... chicken noodle soup?

Dion: [beaming] Thank you, Ce-ko. [sticks tongue out at everyone else... hey, he *is* getting the best treatment.]

Roger: Can I have chicken noodle soup, too? [smiles innocently]

Susanne: You want me to cook? In *that* kitchen?

Celly: I heard that!

P-kun: I'm a little teapot, short and stout...

Kristsi: Where was that number for Jack Kevorkian?

Remy: Hey, he's my Guardian, I'll decide about that.

P-kun: ... tip me over and pour me out...

[Remy opens the phone book]

Zeke: *sssnooooooooorrre...........* *snuffle, hack, cough*

Seth: That's it... [manages to stand, picks up pillow, drags himself toward Zeke] I have to end his suffering... our suffering... it's all his fault... his fault....

Meredith: [calmly takes the pillow away and guides him back to his seat on the couch] There, there... nothing's going to hurt you now... Nyx, how about some drugs over here?

Nyx: Here.

Meredith: No! Prescription! Prescription!

Nyx: Sorry... geez... these work better, though.

Meredith: [debating with herself] Fine.

Roger: Do you really want to see Seth on a trip? I've got a feeling that it wouldn't be pretty...

Dion: Just give him the prescription... ooh, down in the third quarter...

Kell: Dammit! I have money on that game!

Mercy: Against who?

Kristsi: [smirk]

Seth: Hey, how long until this stuff you gave me takes-- ooh... never mind... [settles back on some pillows and stays relatively calm]

Nyx: Told ya.

Dion: Looks like Disney stock is still down...

[random chuckling and giggling from around the room, Nyx and Celly high-five]

Susanne: [comes in from kitchen, hands Roger a mug] Here ya go, I managed to make some tea.

Roger: [takes mug] Ah, I think you've saved me life.

Dion: Ce-ko? *sniff* Can I have some tea, too?

Anaera: Don't do it, Celly! He's just playing on your pity to order you around!

Celly: Aw, but he's so pathetic, and helpless... [Dion looks at her with puppy-dog eyes] You see? He needs me!

Euridyce: Dion, when we're all healthy again, we're going to remember how much of a wuss you really are!

[Orion comes back into the room]

Mercy: Feel better?

Orion: [nods gratefully]

Mercy: Good, go back and lay down, and leave me alone.

Kell: [jumps up, arms raised enthusiastically] YESSS!!!! [sees everyone's confused faces, points to the TV] The game... never mind. [sits back down]

Meredith: My, you looked healthy just now.

Roger: Well, don't judge the rest of us by him... I've still got a pounding headache.

Remy: And P-kun still has a fever...

Nyx: At least you got him to sleep.

Seth: Wow... that pillow over there just turned to a rabbit...

Anaera: Nyx, you decided what to give him, you're in charge of making sure he doesn't do anything dumb... and Euridyce, if you move one inch closer to him, I'll... do something. I don't know what yet, but you'll want to avoid it!

[Euridyce sits back down on the other side of the room]

Kristsi: Hey, look at the bright side. At least none of the Otaku are--

Susanne: ACHOO!!! Oh.... dabbit.