New Orleans LA, July 12, 2003
"I t'ink today's gon' be de day, Shel." Questa said when he woke up on the morning of July 12. The light was finally back in his eyes, the color was back in his face, and his appetite and health had been improving on a daily basis since they got past the initial couple of weeks of pain.
"Well you certainly look more like yourself and less like a walking zombie." Shelby laughed, kissing him softly. "But just make sure you're not overdoing it..."
"Shel for pity's sake look at dis room! I've been cooped up in here for months...an' now dat I finally feel like gettin' out of it...I'm gon' do it. But I won' drain myself or anythin', I promise."
Shelby laughed again. "Can't say I blame you. And in that case, why don't we start by joining everyone for breakfast? I invited Stephen to come over too. I think he's feeling a little neglected because I spend so much more time here than I do with him."
"Actually...gon' shower first, den go down for breakfast. Can' go down dere feelin' an' lookin' like I spent a few months doin' some hard partyin' an' not much else." Questa laughed and got up, heading for the bathroom. "I'll be back."
Fifteen minutes later, all refreshed and dressed in a fuzzy blue bathrobe and a pair of slippers, Questa returned to his room to find Shelby holding out a wrapped present to him.
"Qu'est-ce que c'est?" Questa asked with a surprised raise of his eyebrows.
Shelby smiled. "I bought it for you in honor of your being well enough to rejoin the world. I actually got it awhile ago, but I've been saving it for this day. Go on, open it up."
Questa sat down on his bed and started fighting with the tape holding the blue and white wrapping paper in place. When he finally got it open he almost jumped up and down like a little boy on Christmas morning. "Ooh! The Road to El Dorado! Shel, I've wanted dis movie since it came out! Merci, chere, mais...really, you didn' have to..."
"Je vous en prie." Shelby replied with a sly wink, switching to French with unexpected ease. "I wanted to do it. Do you want to get dressed before going down to breakfast?"
Questa looked at his bathrobe. "Uh...yeah. Dat might be a good idea."
"Okay. I'll be in the bathroom. Come get me when you're ready."
It only took Questa five minutes to get dressed and he definitely looked more like himself in jeans, a red t-shirt and a pair of sneakers when he popped his head into the bathroom. Shelby, who was standing at the sink brushing her long brown hair, smiled at him in the mirror. "That's much better. More Questa-like."
"I know." Questa replied, walking in behind her. He ran his fingers through her hair and then turned her around to face him, surprising her with a slow, tender yet intense kiss. He was getting more used to the closeness of those embraces, and got no end of enjoyment out of surprising her from time to time. "I love you."
Shelby smiled again and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I love you too. Now let's go down to breakfast before they're finished and we have to eat by ourselves."
It was Mercy's turn to cook breakfast that morning, and she was just getting ready to serve it up to the waiting Guild members when Shelby and Questa walked into the kitchen. Questa went over to Mercy, who was piling scrambled eggs and bacon onto a platter, and tapped her on the shoulder. Flashing her the zaniest grin he could when she looked at him in surprise, he said, "I certainly hope dere's enough of dat for Shelby an' me to have some too...I'm hungry!"
"Tante Mattie taught me de art of cookin' for a large group of people, Questa Devereaux. You bet there's enough for you guys. Pull up a couple of chairs. Guys, make room for dem, would ya?" Mercy laughed. "Welcome back, Questa. Nice to see you're up an' 'bout 'gain."
"How are you feelin', Questa?" Singer asked.
"Let's see...hungry...hungry...an' oh yeah, hungry!" Questa laughed. "But seriously...I'm doin' better. Not one hundred percent, but I'm gettin' dere. Who wants to watch The Road to El Dorado wit' me dis afternoon?"
"We don' have dat movie, Questa..." Emil pointed out while trying to steal more bacon than was good for him, which only got his hands slapped by Mercy, who caught him at it.
"We do now. Shelby gave it to me dis mornin'." Questa replied.
"Y'know, Emil, if you'd jus' not do dat, she wouldn' slap your hands..." Fifolet chuckled, seeing Emil yank his hand back after Mercy slapped it. "An' Questa, I t'ink it's pretty safe to say most of us will end up watchin' de movie wit' you later. We're jus' glad you're feelin' better."
When breakfast was over, Zoe and Singer did the dishes while everyone else went off to do their own things for the rest of the morning. Stephen wasn't due to join them until lunch time, so Questa asked Shelby to go for a walk with him.
"Questa, are you sure?" Shelby asked, skeptically.
"I haven' been outside in months. Yes I'm sure. We won' go far, I jus' wan' get outside, get some fresh air for once." Questa insisted.
They ended up walking to the graveyard, which was one place Shelby had never spent a great deal of time. In fact, the only time she had been there was a year ago when Tante Mattie had died. She was curious as to why Questa took her there, but soon figured it out when she recognized a name on a tombstone.
"Your mother..." Shelby breathed in awe.
"I t'ink she'd like you. You're as good for me as she was if not better." Questa smiled. "What was your mother like? I've told you a lot 'bout Momma in de past year an' a half, but you never talk 'bout yours."
"There isn't much to tell. She was sixteen and pregnant with Steve when she married Dad. Young, scared and gullible. Vulnerable too. Couldn't stand up to a flea. She killed herself when I was eight and Steve was thirteen. And as sure as we're standing here it was Dad's abusive behaviour that killed her. She couldn't handle it. I actually think she hated him towards the end. She wanted to give us a better life...she always said that anyway...but she could never do it."
"I t'ink Momma would have done everythin' she could to give me a good life...a diff'rent life dan I've had...if she'd lived." Questa said thoughtfully. "Sure, dey might have ended up killin' her b'fore she succeeded, but I still t'ink she would have tried."
"Tell me something, Questa." Shelby said suddenly. "Do you want to be a father, someday? Do you want to have children?"
Questa smiled. "Yeah, eventually. I want a daughter...I don' know why, but I do. Always have. But de idea scares de crap out of me too, t'ough."
"Why?"
"B'cause of de possibility of turnin' into my father...I couldn' bear dat." Questa replied. "I ain' dat smart, but I do know, t'anks to you an' Tante Mattie, dat everythin' dat happened to me wasn' my fault. It still left me like dis, t'ough, an' I'd hate myself forever if I had a child an' treated it de same way..."
"I've thought about things like that too..." Shelby admitted. "More than anything, I want to get married and have at least one child someday. But then I think about my parents...and it scares me. Steve and I turned out fairly okay, I guess, if killing five men falls under the okay category. But I wonder if I could be a better parent than my own were. Sometimes I'm afraid to even try, you know?"
Questa chuckled quietly. "Oh yeah I know."
But I actually think there's a difference between us and them, Questa." Shelby continued.
"What kind of difference?"
"I think that because we know what it's like to be treated that way, if we were to have children someday, we'd have an advantage. See our parents were supposed to know better than to do what they did to us, right?"
Questa tilted his head and looked at her, confused. "Yeah..."
"Well, they were supposed to know better, but they didn't. They did those things anyway. Now if we had children, not only would we know better, but we'd also know the results, because the way we turned out is the result. That's the difference. We'd know better and in knowing better, we wouldn't behave the same way. In fact, we'd probably make more concentrated efforts to not end up like our parents."
"Oh I get it." Questa said, relieved. "We're better educated dan our parents were an' we'd use dat education to our advantage instead of ignoring it."
"Exactly." Shelby smiled. "You know, I think you'd make a wonderful father someday."
"Oh I dunno 'bout dat...you'd prob'ly be a better mother. But it doesn' matter right now anyway, does it? Dat's someday. Not now."
"True."
"Anywhere you wan' go? I kinda wan' get outta here now..." Questa asked, taking Shelby's hand in his.
Shelby shook her head. "This is your first time outside in months, hon. Anywhere you want to go is okay with me. I'm here to keep you company and help you enjoy this beautiful summer day."
Hand in hand, they walked back to the safehouse, but rather than go inside where everyone else was, Questa took Shelby around to the backyard. In one corner of the yard, in front of the trees and bushes, was a swing made out of bamboo and wicker, with a brown and beige canopy over it. Questa sat down, pulling Shelby down beside him. They sat in silence for several minutes, swinging and thinking.
"It's so peaceful and nice out here..." Shelby finally commented.
"Oui, I know. Dat's why I came here. It's a good place to sit an' t'ink."
"Or we could do this..." Shelby said. She repositioned herself and leaned over to Questa, kissing him gently and then gave him a coy smile.
"Definitely more fun dan t'inkin'...I don' know why I didn' t'ink of it..." Questa laughed. He kissed her back, losing himself in the moment and letting instinct take over. As the kiss deepened in instensity, he pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her and soaking up the feeling of her being near him. Feeling like she was in a dream, Shelby found herself automatically wrapping one arm around him and tracing the fingers of her other hand down his cheek before that arm found its way around his body as well. It seemed as if time had stopped, but neither of them cared. It just felt too good and too right. They remained that way, locked in each other's embrace, for a blissful eternity of minutes.
When they finally broke the kiss, Questa smiled. "Y'know, I t'ink I really am diff'rent from my father."
"Why do you say that?"
"Dere ain' no way on earth he had any idea how I feel right now. If he had...he never woulda been de way he was." Questa replied. "I love you. An' I t'ink dat's de biggest diff'rence of all."
"I couldn't have said it better myself." Shelby agreed. "Now let's go inside before we get sunburned."