there has been a litany of complaints from people who can't figure out how to enter my site, and apparently an alt tag isn't enough, and your little link cursor isn't sufficient either, so here's the deal: click on my face. are you happy? personally, i think you need to go back to your Mastering Websurfing course, or aol's help room, or wherever you magically appeared from in such a tizzy, if you can't figure *that* out. not like it's rocket science. regardless: i don't want to be in any more trouble than i already am. and i just want to look pretty for all of you. my sweetest, most buttercup-kissed apologies if you don't know how to use the scroll bar and never saw this, or if you're on 256 colors and can't even read it, and i'm sorry for all the times you just sat there cow-eyedly gazing at my index image, and for any of my perceived other trespasses on your refined sensibilities. enjoy.
last update 12 june 1999
by order of ben
because my design is
so boneheaded
and ugly
and one big mistake.
