"We can dthis the easy way, or we can do this
the hard way,
The easy way being you sign that contract and
make everything official,
and the hard way being you don't sign it and
I take that contract, and shove
it so far up your @$$, I'll have to open your
mouth to sign it!!!"
"It's a great day to be a blonde."
Steve Austin and Brian
Pillman's favourite quote, when they teamed as the Hollywood
"You know, if you really
think about it! You would have made a damn good looking woman!"
Steve Austin's comments
about Johnny B. Badd (Marc Mero) Summer of 1994.
"Ricky Steamboat, you
are one of the greatest wrestlers to ever lace up the boots, but I'm
going to tell you right
now, that you just saved yourself one hell of an asskicking!"
Steve Austin to Ricky
Steamboat at FallBrawl 1994.
"You can get your ass
out of the ring while he announces my name, because my name is
Steve Austin, and tonight
for a very, very short while, your name is Eric Bischoff."
Steve Austin to Mickey
Whipwreck before one of their matches.
"Youíre a piece of garbage!
You donít deserve to be in the same ring with Stone Cold, much
less the same state!
What Iím gonna do is forfeit the match right now son.
Iím gonna forfeit the
match out of the goodness of my hart, because Iím in a good mood
today! Years from now,
you can say to your kids: I was fortunate enough to beat Stone
Cold in a match, a forfeit
no less, but it was a win!
The question Iím gonna
ask you: Are gonna accept the forfeit? Or am I gonna have to go a
head and stomp your
little guts in?"
Austin's proposal to
Aldo Montoya. Of course Austin stomped Aldo's little guts in!
"The first thing I want
be done is to get that piece of crap out of my ring! Don't just get
him out of the ring,
get him out of the WWF, because I've proven son, without a shadow of
a doubt - you ain't
got what it takes anymore.
You sit there and you
thump your bible and you say your prayers, and it didn't get you
anywhere. Talk about
John. 3:16, Austin 3:16 says: I've just whipped you ass!!
All he is got to do
is buy him a cheap bottle of Thunderbird, and try to dig back some of
that courage, he had
in his prime.
As the King of the Ring,
I'm serving notice to everyone of the WWF superstars. I don't
give a damn what they
are, they are all on the list, and that is Stone Cold's list, and I'm
fixing to start running
through all of them.
As far as this championships
match is considered, son, I don't give a damn, if it's Davey
Boy Smith or Shawn Michaels.
Steve Austin's time has come, and when I get the shot, you
are looking at the next
WWF champion, and that's the bottomline - cause Stone Cold said
Steve Austin's speech
at the King of the Ring 1996.
"Screwed my ass Bret!
You're sitting out there whining and crying, because you are a
loser! I tried to come
out and help you win the title. It could have been you and me going
for it all at WrestleMania,
but you blew the whole damn thing because you are a loser!
Well Bret, at WrestleMania
13, you will say "I Quit" and someday, it will be you and me
for the championship,
and I will be the next WWF champion!"
about Bret Hart's loss to Sid in a steel cage match, before
"Get your ass up - you
Austin to Mankind.
"DTA - you stupid piece
of trash. Don't ever trusth anybody. You ain't gonna be my
partner, never. Cause
you are a longhaired freak, and you suck!"
Austin to Mankind, after
giving him the Stone Cold Stunner.
"I couldn't understand
a word you said but it sounds like you're pissed..."
Austin to Faarooq.
"You got your little
challenge, you think you are big and tough. You stand up there all
jacked up. I got some
challenges for you.
I challenge you to get
a descent haircut!
Since you are a piece
of crap, I challenge you to flush yourself out the toilet (Not his
Austin to Rocky Maivia.
"Because I am sick and
tired of seeing Mike Tyson. He comes in, he is shaking everybody's
hands, making friends
with all the WWF superstars. And it made me so damn sick, that I've
been in the back throwing
Steve Austin's opinion
about Mike Tyson.
"Oh Hell Yeah! No more
Mr. Nice Guy until after the Rumble"
Austin's statement after
a couple of Stunners before the Royal Rumble 1998.
"I got nothing to say
to you. Just park my damn truck, and if you scratch it, you are going
to get you ass whipped."
Austin to Michael Cole,
when he arrived at the Royal Rumble 1998.
"You can cover up your
eyes your ears and your mouth but you can't cover up your ASS!
And when it's all said
and done that's where i'm gonna stick this Belt and that's the bottom
line cuz Stone Cold
Austin is on a roll.
"This is completely pathetic.
Lights go off and Kane Shows up. I'm supposed to be
scared..Well I ain't"
Steve's opinion about
"You got 30 seconds to
bring your ASS Out here or I'll tear up every 50,000 dollar
camera you got... You
can't afford not to bring your ASS Out here!"
Austin wants McMahon.
"To Kane, to Kane I say
this: I accept your little stipulations on your match. I accept any
kind of match you wanna
throw at Stone Cold Steve Austin because I've bled before, I
ain't afraid to bleed
again but when you put this son of a bitch on the line it means your
big dead ass belongs
to Stone Cold Steve Austin and let me tell you something, you say that
if you dont win the
WWF title you'll set yourself on fire. I'll tell you something right now
if your dumb enough
to set your ass on fire in this ring you can bet your bottom dollar that
Stone Cold Steve Austin
is gonna bring all the marshmellas, all the hot dogs and all the
beer. Doesn't matter
to me. You can be a human campfire and I'll sit down and watch you
burn all day long and
if you start to go out you can rest assured that old Stone Cold will
be right there to throw
another log on the fire."
Stone Cold before the
first blood match. Sent to me by Austin4E4@aol.com.
"Take the cupcake out
of your mouth fatass, and give me an answer!"
Steve to Paul Bearer,
sent to me by email@example.com.
"When the glass breaks
I am out there ready to whoop somebodies ass."
A usual Austin quote
sent to me by LaSalle@InfoAve.Net.
"Owen Hart! I'm not going
to listen to the doctors, I'm not going to wear this piece of crap
they gave me. The fact
that you dropped me on my head last night, don't mean a damn thing
to me! The fact of the
matter was you were too stupid to cover me when you had the
chance! The bottom line
is you're a loser, Owen Hart. Not because I say you are, but
because it runs through
your veins, cause your mom and dad gave that to you, and I can't
do nothing about that!
Tonight I truly will, open up a can of whoop-ass and show you
exactly what Austin
3:16 means, and that's the bottom line!!!"
Austin to Owen Hart
sent to me by firstname.lastname@example.org
"When 3:16 show's up
on you're pager you know your ass is mine! And thats the bottom line
cause Stone Cold said
One of Austin's tricks
in his feud with Rocky Maivia sent to me by MNSTANGSR1@aol.com
"You don't suck cause
these people say you suck you cause Stone Cold said so!"
Austin to Rocky Maivia
sent to me by email@example.com
"What I want to kow if
its Stone Cold Steve Austin against Kane and Mankind or is it
Stone Cold steve Austin
against 3 opponents so I want to know where the hell you comin
Austin and Undertaker
in Raw is war sent to me by firstname.lastname@example.org
The following Austin
quotes was sent to me by Toreador@Tropicweb.net.
"You think you can beat
my ass, Hell No!, I think I can beat your ass, Why Hell Yeah!!!"
Austin to McMahon.
"Come on you stupid bastard,
Austin to McMahon before
"Does anyone have a cold
beer for Steve Austin?"
Austin on RAW
"You look like the Jack
Ass of the year to me"
Austin to McMahon
"You come out here claiming
your a gorilla, yet you heehaw like a jackass."
Steve to Gorilla Monsoon
sent to me by email@example.com
"If you put an "S" infront
of HITMAN you know what I think of him!!" Austin talking
about Bret Hart sent
to me by firstname.lastname@example.org
"If you want some mercy
son, then take your a$$ to church"
Steve when he is at
his best, sent to me by Daniel.Coleman@mortgagesvcs.com
" Don't say one word
Vince I'll knock you danm lights out too."
Austin talking trash
to Vince McMahon, sent to me by VFord20366@aol.com
"What you have just proved
with a shadow of a doubt, you are the world's dumbest SON
OF A BITCH"
Austin to McMahon right
before McMahon was arrested sent to me by @efn.org
"The Undertaker just
told you to go to hell so I'll spin you around kick you in your ass and
give you a head start."
Again Austin talks trash
to Vince McMahon, sent to me by email@example.com
"You treat me like a
dog and expect me to smile, you remind me of a jackass!"
Austin to Vince when
Vince thought he tamed him, this was sent to me by
The following 6 quotes
was sent to me by firstname.lastname@example.org
"You were probably paradin'
around in your little pajamas with the World title goin' to
your wife: 'Honey, how
do I look as WWF champion?' She probably thought you looked
like a jackass, because
Austin to Vince just
before challenging him to a match
"You said you weren't
a scrooge, how do you feel now you silly bastard?"
Austin to Briscoe when
Briscoe was arrested
"You said you didn't
suck, who sucks now, you bastard?"
Austin to Patterson
when Patterson was arrested
"Aw, how do you feel
now you silly, little bastard? You think you're so damn special, don't
Austin to Vince when
Vince was arrested
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry
you're so damned stupid."
Austin's apology to
Vince after Austin was arrested
"If you came here asking
me for one of my beers, forget it, I ain't got none for you."
Austin to Commisioner
Slaughter a week before WrestleMania 14
"Well VInce, you told
me that I had one foot in the grave. I'll tell you this son. Tonight I'm
gonna take my foot out
and stick it up your @$$!"
Austin To Vince On Monday
Night Raw, sent to me by Teetee0811@aol.com
"Well if everybody would
like to see it say i got the damn rematch jackass say something
get that stupid look
off ur face!!"
Austin challenging Kane
to a rematch, sent to me by email@example.com
"I'm going to whoop the
Undertaker's ass, and then I'm going to throw him into the back
of that hearse. And
if you get in my way, I'll beat your ass too. Then I'll throw your ass
into the hearse, and
I'll drive all three of us down the highway to hell, going 110 miles per
hour! And that's the
bottom line, cause STONE COLD SAID SO!"
Austin to McMahon, sent
to me by Keph02@aol.com
"You say I have one foot
in the grave right now, but I'm gonna pull that foot out of the
grave and shove it up
your ass, AND THATS THE BOTTOM LINE CAUSE STONE COLD
Austin to the Undertaker
on RAW, from firstname.lastname@example.org.
The following six quotes
were sent to me by email@example.com
"Cause when you put
this son of a bitch on the line it means that your big dead ass belongs
to stone cold and that's
the bottom line."
Stone Cold to Kane Before
first blood match
"If you want me to continue
to do things the hard way then give me a HELL YEAH!!!!
Stone Cold to Vince
"I'll stomp a mud hole
in ya son and then walk you dry"
Stone Cold talking trash
"Sure I'll fight ya son.
I might lie in a headlock for fifteen minutes or I might knock your
damn lights out just
Austin talking trash
"It's not a race thing
it's a kicking your ass thing and that's the bottom line"
Stone Cold to Farooq
"You can get a special
ref hell you can get a special jackass I really don't give a ratas ass"
Stone Cold to Vince
before over the edge
"A submission match,is
not my kinda match. Do I know a whole lot of wrestling holds,HELL
NOO I DONT!!!But I will
beat your ass till u do say I quit.You sit there,every week you get
on tv, saying ya been
screwd. Well let me tell ya this son. I aint bringing a condom to the
ring, I'M BRINGING A
HELL OF A CAN OF WHOOP ASS!!!!"
Stone colds comment
on the submission match againts bret Hart.
"Well I'll tell you what,
Owen Hart last night, Calgery Stampede, 1 2 3, Stone Cold Steve
Austin's looking up
at the lights!! I'll tell you this and I want this put in the contract...don't
flinch I aint gonna
hit ya...I want this put in the contract. Bret Hart says if he gets beat,
won't wrestle in the
United States again...BIG DEAL!!! If I can not beat Owen Hart at
Summerslam, after the
match when he pins me 1 2 3, if that happens, he can role down his
trunks, pull down his
little panties, bend over and I'll kiss him right on his ass RIGHT IN
FRONT OF THE WORLD!!!!
Put that in the Contract!! THATS THE BOTTOM LINE, I'LL
KISS HIS ASS IF I CAN'T
KICK IT AND THATS THE WAY IT'S GONNA BE!!!!!"<
Steve Austin says to
Vince McMahon on his match with Owen Hart at SummerSlam, the day
after the Calgery Stampede
on Raw, sent to me by firstname.lastname@example.org
"It's not a race thing...it's
not a COLOR thing...it's a me kicking your ass thing, and that's
just what I'm gonna
Austin to Faarooq, sent
to me by email@example.com
"You see...the old Steve
Austin would've told you to take that camera and shove it up your
ass...but the new, improved
Austin is gonna tell you to take as many pictures as you
can...because this is
the first...AND LAST...time you will ever...EVER....see Stone Cold Steve
Austin in a freaking
Austin to McMahon when
Austin was "reformed" sent to me by firstname.lastname@example.org.
"I'm fixin to come up
there... and put this foot... IN YOUR A$$!!!!"
Again a Austin classic
to McMahon, from email@example.com
"I outta knock your damn
lights out for wearing those stupid shoes!"
line before the Austin-Kane
rematch for the WWF title, from CCom192742@aol.com
".....Your sixty minutes
is up,but the reign of violence of Steve Austin is set and the World
will continue,and I cant be stopped cause there ain't nobody here
that can stop me,and
that the bottom line....WHY?.......Because Stone Cold said so!!!..."
Steve Austins' words
at the end of "Stone Cold said so video", sent to me by
"I appreciate the fact
that you support the fight Austin vs. Tyson, I appreciate the fact
that you're out here
to promote that because Stone Cold Steve Austin can damn well beat
the living crap out
of Mike Tyson."
Austin tells Shawn Michaels
the facts of life before Wrestlemania XIV, from
The following three quotes
are from firstname.lastname@example.org
"Your limo driver's
knocked out and you got four flat tires!"
The night he challenged
McMahon to a match on Raw.
His promo for MTV's "Celebrity
Deathmatch: DeathBowl '98"
"If you all are gonna
be watching football on Super Sunday gimme a hell yeah"
(Crowd: "Hell yeah!")
"If you all think halftime
shows suck, gimme a hell yeah"
(Crowd: "Hell yeah")
"You turn the dial on
your TV to MTV for 'Celebrity Deathmatch: Deathbowl '98"
(SCSA mentions the matches)
"Open up your own can
of whoop-ass. And that's the bottom line because Stone Cold Said
Great Celebrity Deathmatch
(About the match between
brothers Liam and Noel Gallagher of the rock group Oasis)
"They might look like
a couple of skinny nancy boys but give them a couple pints of lager
and they can do some
(About an "electrified
razor wire cage of death" match between Jay Leno and David
wire and human flesh just don't mix."
(During a match of Bruce
Willis/Demi Moore v. Tom Cruise/Nicole Kidman where all four
stars are on top of
each other in the ring)
"I've seen four car
pileups but never four star ones."
"When you hear the glass
it's Vince's ASS!!!!!"
Another Austin classic,
sent to me by DCA0001@aol.com
a load of crap, don't preach your morality to me! Steve Austin
doesn't have any mercy...
you want mercy? Take your ass to church!!"
A great Austin quote
"Can you speak up? I
cant hear a damn word youre saying cause you've got 18,000 people
calling you a asshole."
Stone cold to McMahon
at Judgement Day after being fired, from
"If I have to fight both
Undertaker and Kane at Breakdown I won't be bringing Austin
3:16 you can damn well
bet I'll be bringing Austin 6-6-6. And that's the damnedest bottom
line I ever bottom-lined!!!"
Austin talking trash
1 week before IYH Breakdown, from Ranger889@aol.com
"You said it would be
"McMahon 3:16 says: I've got the brass to fire your ass"...well, it
looks more like "McMahon
3:16 says I just pissed my pants!"
Austin to McMahon after
he scared McMahon enough to lose control of his "bodily
functions", from email@example.com.
"If you want me to pop
out Vince's eyes give me a HELL YEAH"
Stone Cold to Vince
McMahon on Raw is War on October 19th, from MJ23rcks@aol.com.
"You gotta figure I weigh
240-250 pounds...When you get dropped on your head...Well that
just ain't worth a damn."
Said to Jim Ross in
a interview after Summer Slam "1997, from firstname.lastname@example.org
Everybody` s calling
you baddest man on the planet , but right now you got your beedy
little eyes locked on
eyes of THE World's toughest son of a bitch!"
Austin to Mike Tyson
before Wrestlemania 14 from email@example.com.
" It's always easy to
be a smartass when you got a microphone in your hand. Hell son,
you're halfway across
the building or I'd open a can of whoopass on you right here on the
Billboard Music Awards!
I know you people are looking up here, saying: "Hell, he looks like
the toughest SOB on
the planet!" Well, guess what, basically you hit the nail right on the
head, because you gotta
be one tough SOB to exist in the world of sports entertainment.
When I get home, off
the road, and out of the ring, I like to drink a little beer, drive my
pickup truck, and do
some huntin', but my favorite form a relaxation is to listen to country
music. So, I'm real
proud to introduce the four finalists of country's artist of the year."
Austin presenting an
award at the Billboard Music Awards 1998, from TJSP34@aol.com.
"The first thing I want
you to do Vince, is shut your stinkin hole. Last night the entire
world saw me whip Bret
Hart's ass with his own world famous sharpshooter! The only
problem is the rest
of the Hart Foundation showed up to save his candy ass. You have
thirty seconds Bret.
Thirty seconds to get out here. Don't worry about puttin on your little
black and pink tights
because they look like crap anyway!"
Austin talking trash
about Bret Hart, from firstname.lastname@example.org
"Im gonna whup your ass
you big dead bastard!!"
Austin various times
to UT during their fued in '98, from email@example.com
"We need medical attention
to loading dock 7 and somebody tell Vince McMahon that his
ass belongs to Stone
Steve talking into a
walkie talkie, from firstname.lastname@example.org.
"Don't spill my damn
Steve to Jim Ross after
Chainsaw landed on the announcers table, from
"You Wanna do what I
do 4 a living son, then step into the WWF Warzone, go ahead
create your own wrestler
just another victim 4 Stone Cold to take out 4 player action 4
more BEEP kicked a piece
of trash like you is gonna get in the steal cage with me all the
moves in the World wont
mean jack when you meet the Stone Cold Stunner, you wanna
survive the WWF Warzone
stay away from me and thats the bottom line cause Stone Cold
Stone Cold on the WWF
warzone commericial, from CuTeSoB316@aol.com
"You just hit the nail
right on the head son!"
1 of his famous quotes,
"I dont care if Vince
owns this ring but if he gets in this ring I'm gonna kick his ass out of
it and thats the bottom
line why?!? Cause I said so"
Austin on Raw is War,
"I aint askin ya to lay
down I'll knock your A$$ down!!!"
"Vince: For once in your
life, listen to reason and don't react in a physical and violent way.
Stone Cold: If ya want
me to react in a physical and violent way, give me a HELL YEAH!!!!"
The next five quotes
are from email@example.com
"I'm sorry...I'm sorry
I didn't beat your ass worse that I beat it!"
Austin to McMahon after
the steel cage match in February of 99
"When I got up this morning,
looked past the pile of beer cans and I saw this WWF title
sittin' there, I said
to myself, this damn thing ain't worth all the trouble, I looked at this
belt and said, this
thing just ain't worth all the aggravation. I looked at that WWF title
belt and said 'EH EH'
this damn thing just ain't gonna cut it!"
Austin on the last RAW
(March 29, 1999)
"I'll drop you on that
stack 'a dimes you call a neck!"
Famous Austin quote
"I'm gonna check myself
into the Smackdown Hotel, roll right up to room 3:16 and burn
that sonuvabitch, to
Austin to Rock on the
RAW before WrestleMania XV
He's said that more
than a few times!
"Rock, you can sit there
and spin your little nursery ryhmes about know your role avenue or
jabroni dr. but I'll
tell this son you better get your Ass serious Cause at Wrestlemania 15
Stone Cold Steve Austin
is Gonna take his ass To Philladelphia Check Right into the Smack
Down Hotel..Role Right
into Romm 316 And Burn the Son of A Bitch To The Ground...After
wrestle mania Stone
Cold is gonna drink a hell of a lot a beer so I think we should share a
little beer right now."
Stone Cold to the Rock
and Vince just before giving them a beer bath, from
"Undertaker you said
you and Kane trying to take my title is nothing personal! Well when
you try to take that
away from me your damn right its personal! But Ah! Uh! Dont expect
Austin 3:16 to show
up for that match!........EXPECT AUSTIN 666!"
"I will give you 5 seconds
to get out of this ring you lucky son of a bitch or I will drop you
on that roll of dimes
you call a neck and thats the bottom line because Stone Cold said so."
Stone Cold to Shawn
Michaels on a Monday Night Raw 1997 from
"You better give your
soul to the Lord or somebody cause your ass is mine."
To the hart foundation
"I'll beat your ass in
my backyard, I'll beat your ass up in your backyard, hell son, I'll
beat your ass up in
anyone's here backyard."
"Yesturday I got up and
I looked at that piece of sh*t belt and I said:ah-ah! I said that
piece of shit isn't
worht all that trouble and Vince the piece of shit I want is the belt I
made! Vince I'll tell
you this youve got 2 hours to get my belt and give it to me or you will
know what Austin 3:16
says I just whipped your ass really means!!!!"
"Listen Rock, Bring your
nursery rhyme singin' ass out here so Stone Cold can show you the
meaning of "SMACK DOWN"
" I'll kick your ass
in your back yard, I'll kick your ass in my back yard, hell I'll kick your
ass in anybody out here's
"Don't take this ass-whoopin
From the game WWF Warzone,
"....Its fun to beat
someone's ass at anywhere around the world.But if you beat someone's
ass in Houston, then
you done something, so thats exactly what I'm gonna do, and if you
don't get the hell out
of here, I'll start with your ass!"
"You remember that clause
you had awhile back that said I could never asault you unless
you actually physically
provoked me, well that all been changed. From now on Vince, from
now on, it's open season
on Vince McMahon, so what that means is any time you show up on
a Monday night Raw as
soon as you step out of that car, when you step out of that car,
Stone Cold Steve Austin
can punch you right in the mouth...and the only thing you can do
about it Vince is reach
down pick up your little teeth put 'em in your shirt pocket and go on
about your business!
Now look at me! If you decide not to come to work that means Stone
Cold can drive to Greenwhich,
Conneticut knock on your front door, when you answer that
front door I can punch
you right in your mouth and the only thing you can do about it is
pick up your little
teeth, put 'em in your shirt pocket and say 'Linda! Stone Cold knocked
out some more of my
Most of these came from Powerslam.