Murphy's Laws for Shul
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Film projectors always work before the class meeting begins.
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The probability of the Rabbi tripping over the mike cord is greater
on open house Friday nights than any other service.
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No matter how many bulletins you print, you'll always need one more.
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A member living 15 miles aways will be 15 minutes early; Members
living two blocks will be 15 minutes late.
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The shorter the agenda, the longer the business meeting.
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Business meetings ALWAYS last at least 15 minutes longer than they
should -- So do some sermons.
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Shul committees should be made up of three members, two of whom should
be absent at every meeting.
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When you answer the Hebrew School teacher's questiom right, nobody
remembers; when you are wrong, nobody forgets.
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The longest Torah readings always come with the longest sermons.
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The furnace only fails when the outside temperature is less than
20 degrees below zero. The air conditioner only fails when the
outside temperature is 90 degrees or above.
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When the Rabbi misspeaks in a speech, at least half of those taking
notes will write the remark down as an important thought from the
sermon.