Title: If You Give Written By: Kyoko Godaikun Disclaimer: SMAP does not belong to me. Their bodies might belong to Johnny's Jimusho talent agency. Their souls belong to themselves. Also, I really don't think the real Takuya Kimura is as evil as this in real life. He just makes a great bad guy. Also, any wives etc are fictional and made up by me. They are not meant to portray any real person. Another disclaimer: Abuse of the group is mentioned in this story. I have given the abuser a fictional name. Even though a fan of one of Johnny's Jimusho's groups might know who he is. Note: This story features Inherited Vampires. These type of vampires where created by the fanfic author Katrinka. Her concept used with her permission. The basic difference between Inherited vampires and regular vampires is the fact that Inherited can have children, and go out during the day. Their children will also be a vampire, crossing over in their teens. Second note: I did not use honorific when the group members talk to each other. As I have seen in interviews and such that they do not use them with each other. Archiving: Do not archive without express permission from the author. Fanfiction Net and Katrinka is the only one who has permission to archive. Everyone else must ask. Warning: Yaoi, shonen ai Part One: "Shoe-shi-san!" the woman teased Kusanagi Tsuyoshi in her very bad accent. "Is it true you're very famous?" "No, I sell shoes." He said in English. He raised an eyebrow at her. They where eating supper in her hotel room. Tsuyoshi's date began to laugh. Diane was an American, and he wasn't too sure how much Japanese she really knew. Half the time she spoke in English. He also wondered if she wasn't interested in him simply because he was a member of the pop group SMAP. The meat she had ordered for him was so burnt that he could see charcoal on it. The one food Tsuyoshi hated was burnt food. So he ate slowly his meager salad and baked potato. "What's wrong with the steak?" The Diane asked. "Nothing." "You said you wanted to eat American." "I don't eat meat. I'm a vegetarian." He lied. He couldn't tell her the truth. "Opps, sorry." She said in English. She pushed her uneaten salad towards him. He took it from her and began to eat. "That's okay." He smiled at her. They had been going out for almost a month. She was a nice woman, but he couldn't love her. Tall, blond. Looking enough like Shingo made him forget for a while. She was a good distraction from his feelings. With her, he didn't think of the love that would never be fulfilled. He could forget he was in love with his best friend. "Hey, can I meet one of SMAP?" "You have, me." Tsuyoshi joked. "Another member." "Which one." "Don't know his name." She said in English. "He's got long hair." "Nakai-san?" Tsuyoshi guessed. "No! The one in the vampire drama." "Kimura-san?" "Yeah, Kimura-san." She sighed. "He's cute." "He's married." He smiled. "Do you want to meet his wife?" "That's not good." "You've met Shingo-kun." He pointed out. "Shingo-kun was jealous of me." Diane pouted. "He had his hands all over you. He told me that you where his." "Shingo-kun jokes a lot." "There' something not right with that man." she wrinkled her nose in distaste. "He asked to borrow one of my dresses." "I told you, he jokes." Just then his hand phone began to ring. "Do you mind?" She shrugged. "Go ahead." He answered the phone. "Moshi moshi!' "Tsuyoshi! Whatcha doing?" the unmistakable voice of Shingo asked. "I'm on a date!" "Date? Really?" he squealed. *He's up to something.* He took a deep breath. "Yes, a date. What do you want?" "Why don't we go dancing?" Shingo suggested. "You can bring what's her name. Dirma isn't it? Or is it Dormouse?" "Her name's Diane, Baka." He counted to ten slowly. "Can't you call your girlfriend or something?" "Broke up with her. Broke up with my boyfriend too. I'm bored." he pouted. "Then go harass Nakai or Goro." Tsuyoshi suggested. "I've got to go now. I'm on a date." He turned his phone off. Diane wrinkled his nose. "That was Shingo wasn't it?" Tsuyoshi shrugged. "Sorry about that." The woman put her fork down. She got up, kissing his lips. "Let's go to bed." Tsuyoshi didn't answer; instead he kissed her back. Then he pulled her to her bed. They fell onto the bed with a thump. Diane began to giggle. He looked at her concerned. "Are you all right?" "I'm wonderful." She kissed him, rolling him onto his back. He had been with her several times before. If he closed his eyes, he could imagine she was Shingo. Fully clothed, she straddled his body. Then she reached under the pillow. Then suddenly pain flashed in his chest, as she stabbed him over and over. "Why?" he could only gasp. "You've been cheating on me with that Shingo! Don't deny it! You call his name when we have sex!" she told him. "You'll pay for hurting me. Now die!" Life began to fade from Kusanagi Tsuyoshi. His heart slowed, and he died. The vampire woke. He could hear heartbeats around him. He hungered. Not for food, but for blood. Life. He wanted someone's life. He could feel his fangs extend. His entire being told him to hunt. He sat up. He was in a park. A woman passed by him. She was alone; this part of the park was dark. No one would see her. The vampire grabbed the woman and pulled her into the bushes. He ignored her screams as he bit down on her neck. Then he drank. ************* It had been a week since Tsuyoshi had hid himself in the closet. He had turned into a monster and had killed several people. He had to keep himself from his cravings. His body cried out for him to kill someone else. Death was better then letting another loose their life. *I wonder how long a vampire has to starve before he dies? * He thought. He could feel something, something coming closer to the closet. Then he could hear voices. Very familiar voices. His body told him to go find these people, to feed from them. He felt his fangs grow. *Don't find me.* he pleaded to himself. *Let me die.* "Tsuyoshi! Where are you?" he could hear Shingo call. *I can hear you. Keep talking to me.* A pain went through Tsuyoshi's heart. Shingo, why did Shingo have to be here? *Get away from me. I don't want to hurt you.* *Tsuyoshi!* he could hear Shingo think. *YOU won't hurt me. I trust you.* *Go away.* Tsuyoshi thought. *I'm a monster.* *I can help you. Tell me where you are.* his friend begged. "I don't think he's here." Kimura said. "He's here. He keeps telepathing to me." Shingo insisted. "Do *you* see him?" "I don't' have to see him, I feel him." Shingo paused. "Can't you feel him?" "I feel a vampire nearby. Might not be him." Kimura pointed out. "He's a new vampire. They can't telepath." "Tsuyoshi can!" he insisted. "I haven't heard him say one world telepathically. You're crazy. I'm going to check the other room." Tsuyoshi could hear footsteps walking away. *Please, tell me where you are.* he could feel despair from Shingo. *I won't leave without seeing you!* *I'm here.* using all his strength he opened the closet door. "Tsuyoshi." Shingo gasped. He knelt down, touching the man. "You're starving. You've got to feed." He watched as Shingo tore his wrist open with his own fangs. Then he held his wrist to Tsuyoshi's mouth. "Please, drink." Tsuyoshi found himself drinking from his friend. The man's blood was sweet, with a hint of saltiness. He could feel his friend's love for him through his blood. Shingo would never allow him to just give in and die. Soon, too soon, his friend was removing his hand. He took a bandana and bandaged his wrist. "You have to take this slowly." "Let me die. I'm a monster." he pleaded. "You're my best friend, how could I let you die?" He felt Shingo put his arms under him, then he picked him up. Tsuyoshi looked up to him. In the dim light, his blond hair framed his face. For a brief instant, Shingo Katori looked like an angel. "You're safe. I'll protect you." As his friend held him, Tsuyoshi suddenly felt as if nothing would hurt him. *What am I going to do? I'm a vampire." *It's okay. I'm one too.* "I hurt. My chest." "Kimura! I found him!" Shingo said loudly. Tsuyoshi could feel something evil in the room. A stirring of evil. As if he was a dangerous animal in the forest, just waiting to attack. Then he heard Kimura's voice. "You're right. He was here." Shingo's arms tightened around him. "Who would want to kill Tsuyoshi? What has he ever done to anyone?" "We can't keep him here. What if his attacker comes back?" Dressed all in black, Kimura was handsome. "My apartment is close. We'll take him there. Bring your car around." "Fly, it will be quicker. I'll call Dr. Lian." Kimura ordered. "Get the window for me." Tsuyoshi could hear the window being opened. Then Shingo whispered to him. "Hold me as tight as you can." "You can't really mean we're going to fly?" he said, as he suddenly realized he was flying. ************ Shingo Katori worried about his best friend. He sat beside him on the bed. Tsuyoshi had large stab wounds on his chest. Someone had attacked his friend, and left him for dead. He was a vampire now. He wondered how that had happened. Did his attacker cross him over? Tsuyoshi now had the good beginnings of a beard. He wondered if his friend had spent the entire week off hiding in the closet. The murders in the park had been exactly seven days before. Any vampire would know it was the work of a new vampire. One who had overwhelming hunger. Did Tsuyoshi think he would be this way for the rest of his life? His friend looked up to him. There was understanding in his eyes. "Shingo." "Don't talk." Shingo reached out, stroking his hair. "Who did this to you?" "Diane." he gasped. *She stabbed me because she said I loved you.* "That bitch!" He spat. So that was it. Tsuyoshi's girlfriend had attacked him. Shingo had a gut feeling that the woman was bad for his best friend. *I'll make her pay.* *Your blood..." *You can't let anyone know I gave it to you.* Shingo interrupted. *I might get into big trouble.* "I won't tell.* The smaller man promised. *How can I hear you in my mind?* *It's called telepathy. It's a gift some vampires have.* *It makes feel close to you.* he confessed. *It makes me feel the same way.* He bent down, kissing Tsuyoshi's forehead. Suddenly Tsuyoshi looked panicked; he began to back away from Shingo. "He's here." "Who's here?" "Kimura. He's evil." the smaller man insisted. "His blood is evil." "You're my friend, I don't want to kill you." Kimura said from the doorway. "I feel hate from him." "I hate who did this to you. Not you." Kimura tried to reason as he moved closer to him. "Stay away from me!" "Someone's tried to kill him." Kimura said. "It's clouded his thoughts." Shingo looked at his friend. "Can you wait in the living room?" "If it will calm him down." Kimura looked upset. He turned and left. ************* A few minutes passed. Shingo stayed at his side, protecting him. He could still feel Kimura. The man was dangerous, very dangerous. Why didn't Shingo believe him? A woman came into the bedroom. "Is this our patient?" "Yes, this is Tsuyoshi-san." Shingo got off the bed, but stayed close to his friend. "His name is Kentaro-kun." The woman said in English. "Kentaro. What happened?" "My name is Tsuyoshi." he gasped. "Can we talk in Japanese. My English isn't good." The doctor looked at Shingo. "What happened to him?" "I'm not sure." Shingo confessed. "He wasn't a vampire the last time I saw him." "Why don't' I examine him?" She suggested. She moved closer to Tsuyoshi. This doctor was a vampire. It frightened Tsuyoshi. He began to back away from her. Shingo reached out, touching his friend. "It's all right. She's a doctor. She can help you." "Stay with me. Don't leave me alone with her." he begged. "Of course I'll stay with you!" Shingo promised. As Shingo held his hand, the doctor examined Tsuyoshi. Then Kimura helped the doctor clean his wounds, and bandaged him. "How did he become a vampire?" Kimura asked. "He's an inherited hybrid repressive. He crossed over when he died." The woman put up her instruments. "Didn't he tell you?" "I don't think he knew." "But he has to have a twin." The doctor insisted. "Tsuyoshi doesn't have a twin." Shingo said. "How can you be so sure?" "We've been in the same group since 1988. I think we would have known if he had a twin." Kimura growled. "It really isn't the time to argue about this." Dr. Lian admitted. "You have a lot of scars. How did you get them?" "I don't know," Tsuyoshi said. "I just have them." "How can you forget getting so many scars?" the woman said skeptically. "I can't remember." "If he says he can't remember, he can't remember!" Kimura hissed. Tsuyoshi could feel a wave of evil from his friend. "Kimura-sama. He needs vampire blood to heal." Kimura began to roll up his sleeve. He moved towards Tsuyoshi. In response, the smaller man looked up to Shingo. "I don't want his blood." "You must have vampire blood to recover." The doctor told him. "You need Kimura-sama's blood." "What makes his blood so special? I want Shingo's blood." His hand tightened. "I trust him." The doctor looked at Shingo. "Do you mind?" "Of course I don't." Shingo pulled his hand away from his friends. Then he used his fangs to cut his wrist. He sat beside him on the bed, and put his wrist against his lips. "Drink." Tsuyoshi put a hand on Shingo's wrist, and drank. ****************** Tsuyoshi woke to the feel of lips caressing his forehead. Strong arms held him tightly. He felt warm, safe...loved. Why hadn't he ever realized his best friend loved him? The years he had loved Shingo in secret, worrying he would be rejected. All this time, Shingo had felt the same way. He didn't' dare open his eyes. He was so afraid the person holding him would leave. *I'll never leave you.* he heard Shingo promise in his mind. The arms around him tightened. *Now, sleep.* *I don't want to sleep. What if I wake, and your gone?* Tsuyoshi didn't know how Shingo could talk to him in his mind. He didn't care. It made him feel safer. "Look at me." He couldn't help it. He looked at the larger man. His friend's blond hair was tousled. He reached out, touching it. Shingo kissed him very gently. Tsuyoshi opened himself to the kiss. The kiss deepened. Shingo's arms tightened even tighter. Then Shingo pulled away from him. There was regret in his eyes. "I will always be at your side. I love you." "Why didn't you tell me?" "I've loved you since the day I met you." Shingo confessed. "It's been so hard for me to hide it from you." "Why do you?" "I cant' loose you as a friend." "I lov..." Shingo put a finger on his lips. "Don't say it. Not now." *I love you.* He telepathed. "No my love. You don't. What you feel is from the blood I gave you." Shingo's eyes were sad. "Go to sleep. When you wake, you'll forget my feelings for you." Tsuyoshi couldn't help it. He found himself falling asleep. ************************* Shingo held his best friend. For a few moments he could pretend they where together. Imagine that the words Tsuyoshi had told him where real, and not the result of taking his blood. Once they had been lovers, but that had been a very long time ago. Tsuyoshi acted like it had never happened. After time, Shingo realized that his friend had blocked it out. He knew Tsuyoshi had repressed memories of the terrible abuse the group had suffered. The doctor had brought up his friend's scars. He wondered what the doctor would say if she knew each member of SMAP had similar scars. *I would give up every scar I have, just to have you back.* *You made me feel safe. You showed me love didn't have to hurt.* He closed his eyes to the terrible memories. *I never stopped loving you.* he thought with regret, as he kissed Tsuyoshi's forehead. It took him several minutes to realize that Kimura was standing at the door. The older vampire glared at him. "Get out of bed." He tightened his arms around his friend. "NO." "You are breaking the code. Now get out of bed!" Kimura ordered. With a sigh, Shingo kissed his friends sleeping lips. He got out of bed. He went to the closet, and picked out a sweatshirt. With a shrug he put it on. He then looked back at Tsuyoshi. He was even paler then earlier. He said Shingo's name as he slept. *He needs me.* "Come on, quit dawdling." Kimura grabbed him by the shirt, and pulled him into the living room. "What are you doing?" he asked confused. "I don't think you should be the one to stay with him." Kimura said firmly. That put Shingo on the defensive. "Oh and you think you should?" "I don't have a vested interest in him. You do." "I'm his friend, nothing else. That's all I'll ever be." It hurt Shingo to admit it, but it was the truth. "What if he finds out you love him?" Kimura pointed out. "What then? It's just a matter of time before he finds out." "I've kept it from him for a very long time. I can keep it from him now." "It's different now." Kimura hissed, his eyes glowed red. "No, it's not!" Shingo almost shouted. "You let him take your blood. He'll know your feelings." Kimura grabbed Shingo's wrist, exposing the still healing bite wounds. Shingo couldn't help it, he flinched. He was confused as to why Kimura cared so much about Tsuyoshi. He rubbed the sore site. "He won't remember. I've giving him the whammy." "The whammy doesn't' work on everyone." "I've used it on him before." Shingo paused. "If I promise not to let him feed from me again, can I stay?" "Goro's coming over with some blood. Perhaps he could stay..." "Tsu's life is in danger!" Shingo interrupted. "Tell me, if the same thing happened to your wife. How would you be?" Kimura grabbed Shingo by the shirt, then he shoved him against the wall. "You're not married to Tsuyoshi." "That doesn't mean I don't love him." "If I hear of you giving him his blood again. I'm make sure you're sent away from him." Kimura vowed. "Forever." "What about SMAP?" "You can be replaced." Shingo felt a wave of evil emitting from Kimura. "I won't have you forcing your feelings onto him." "I would never do that." "You keep forgetting your place. You *will* do as you're told." Kimura pushed his body against Shingo's. His eyes glowed red. "If you choose to give him blood again. You will have to leave him." Shingo had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Please, no. I'll do as you tell me." Kimura shoved Shingo's head to the side. Shingo could feel his skin tear, as his friend bit him hard. Kimura didn't try to be gentle. The bite hurt. Tears poured down his cheeks, as the older vampire took Shingo's blood. He closed his eyes, praying that the violation would end. After a long while, Kimura pulled away from Shingo. He wiped the blood from his mouth. "You'll have to sleep sometime. How about when it's bedtime, I'll come over and take the night watch?" "Thank you, Kimura-sama." He watched as Kimura went into the kitchen. He went to the mirror. His wound looked like an animal. Not like the normal vampire bite. He cleaned the wound, then bandaged it. He couldn't let Tsuyoshi to see the wound. ****************** Chapter Two **************** Goro arrived a few minutes after Kimura had attacked Shingo. He was carrying a box that contained wine bottles filled with blood. His dark eyes looked at Shingo with curiosity, and then he went into the kitchen. Shingo could hear the vampire putting the bottles in the refrigerator. Goro came back into the living room. Shingo sat on the couch, not moving. Hoping that Kimura would somehow forgive him. That he wouldn't send him away. *Why can't Kimura understand that Tsuyoshi's my life?* he asked himself. *I love him. Does Kimura even know what love is? Why does he want to send me away? What's so special about Tsuyoshi? * "So what's up?" Goro asked. "What took you so long?" Kimura was sitting in a chair, brooding. He took a drag of his cigarette. "I called you almost three hours ago." "I got here as soon as I could." He was dressed in workout clothes. "I had a little trouble with traffic." "You should have flown." "Oh yeah, I should have done that." Goro said sarcastically. "Right during the middle of daylight. When everyone could see me." "That's your problem. You never do as you're told." Kimura let out a puff of smoke. "Did you bring your things?" "I did as you ordered." He took off the backpack he was wearing, and put it on the floor. "I can sense three vampire's here. Where's the third?" "You'll find out soon enough." Kimura took another drag. Shingo had always thought it odd that a vampire would smoke. But he wasn't going to mention it to Kimura. "Why do you need all this blood?" Goro asked. "And why couldn't you tell me over the phone?" "The blood's for Tsuyoshi." Kimura said blithely. "He's a vampire." Goro looked at Shingo. "Is that true?" Shingo shrugged. He looked down to the floor. "Answer Goro!" Kimura snapped. "Yes, it's true." Shingo whispered. "This isn't good. Now there's only one member of SMAP who isn't a vampire." Goro sat down beside Shingo on the couch. "Who crossed him over?" He glared at Kimura. "Was it you?" "I had nothing to do with his crossing over." Kimura told him. "He's a hybrid. He crossed over when he died." "I don't believe you." Goro said. "You've got this thing about crossing over people. Not only that, but you've always been fond of Tsuyoshi." "He's a friend, nothing else." He took a final puff, and crushed out the cigarette. " *I* was your friend until you crossed me over." Goro said bitterly. "Now I'm simply your trumped up slave." "Shingo," Tsuyoshi asked. "What am I doing here?" Shingo looked at his friend. He was standing in the doorway of his bedroom, wearing Shingo's robe. The robe was so large that it dragged the floor. "You need to get back in bed." he went to his side. "I feel fine." Even so, the smaller man sagged against him. He put his arms around him. "You need to go back to bed. You're sick." "Goro!" Kimura snapped. "Help Shingo." "I don't need your help." Shingo snapped. He was getting tired of Kimura. "We can do fine without you." *Don't provoke him.* Goro warned. He got to his feet and took Tsuyoshi's other arm. The two men guided the Tsuyoshi back to bed. "You're sick, and you need to rest." "I still don't understand why you're here." Tsuyoshi said as he lay down. "What can you remember?" Shingo asked. "Falling asleep in the closet." He said puzzled. "Then there was a woman." "That was the doctor. She said you needed plenty of bed rest." "What's wrong with me? Why do I hurt?" Tsuyoshi was confused, very confused. "You have a fever." Goro lied. "How can I have a fever? I'm a vampire." Tsuyoshi pointed out. "Rest now." Shingo covered his friend with a blanket. Shingo glanced towards the door. Kimura was standing, watching them. "I think it's time for Goro to take over. Shingo needs to go to the studio." "Please, let Shingo stay with me." Tsuyoshi whispered. "Of course he'll stay with you." Goro told him. "That's not for you to decide!" Kimura walked up to Goro, slapping him across the face. "Remember to keep your place!" Goro held his red cheek. "Yes master." "He's my best friend." Tsuyoshi looked at Shingo. There was terror in his eyes. "Please." "Why don't' we do what Tsuyoshi wants?" Goro asked. *I'll stay, make sure Shingo behaves.* "Please, Kimura." Shingo asked. *It's your shift anyway. I need to get home.* Kimura telepathed to Shingo. *Goro will be here. So don't try anything.* *Thanks.* Shingo looked at his best friend. "What happened to your neck?" Tsuyoshi asked concerned. Shingo unconsciously touched the bandage. "Kimura and I had a disagreement." "Did he solve it by biting you?" "You could say that." He turned the television on. "Want to watch some TV?" ****************** Tsuyoshi spent several hours of watching television with Shingo. Something was bothering his friend. Every once in a while, Shingo would reach out, and take Tsuyoshi's hand. His thumb would rub his friends. Then always after ten to fifteen minutes, he would look at the door, and let go of his hand. *What's he afraid of?* he asked himself. "We have to be careful." Shingo answered his question. "If Kimura happens to come back. He wouldn't be too happy." "Why? I don't understand." "It's not something you should worry about." Suddenly Shingo smiled. "You want to watch an American soap opera?" "Not again." Tsuyoshi couldn't help but smile. He knew that his friend was changing the subject. But he was tired of Shingo being so serious. "We can watch "These Are the Days of the Forever Shadows." Shingo suggested. "Baka, you mean Dark Shadows." "Dark Shadows, Forever Shadows. Same difference." the man crossed his eyes. Goro came into the bedroom. He was carrying a tray, two mugs and a bottle of what looked like wine. He set it on Shingo's desk. Then without saying anything, he turned and left. "That was weird." Tsuyoshi looked at his friend. "Him knowing you must be hungry?" Shingo grabbed a blanket, and put it over his arm like a tunic. Then, using a very strange accent, he said. "We vampires don't go around saying. I vant to suck your blood. Blah, Blah, Blah." Tsuyoshi couldn't help but smile at the joke. "Christopher Lee, you're not!" "Blah! Blah! Blah!" Shingo moved forward and pretended to nuzzle his friend's neck. "I am better then Lee. I can really suck blood. Blah, Blah, Blah!" He found himself reaching up, and touching the taller man's head. "Prove it." "You're no fun! You probably like Bela Karolli better!" Shingo pulled away from his friend, and did he best flounce to the desk. "You mean the Gymnastics coach?" This made Tsuyoshi laugh. 'News at eleven, woman's gymnastic coach vampire!" "I meant Lagosi!" He turned to face his friend. The look on Shingo's face made him laugh even more. "Yeah, yeah. I know the truth. You crossed over the gymnastics coach!" he chortled. "You better stop laughing. You'll hurt yourself." "You started it." Shingo turned back around, he poured two mugs of the 'wine'. He then came back to the bed. His face was serious as he handed one mug to Tsuyoshi. "First lesson of being a vampire. Getting use to the sweet taste of cow." Tsuyoshi sniffed at the mug. He made a face. "It smells awful." "You get used to it." Shingo took a drink. He sat back down on the bed. "Taste it." He took a small taste. He found that like durum the smell was much worse then the taste. "I was wondering a few things." "Like what?" "Well, your flying for one." he took another drink. He didn't like the stuff, but it did make his hunger pangs fade. "Flying's easy, you just jump to the ground, and miss." "Just like in the Hitch Hiker's books." He guessed. "Exactly like the Hitch Hiker's books." Shingo agreed. "Okay, why can you go out during the day?" He asked. "I thought vampire's couldn't." "Secondaries can't. Us inheriteds can. And before you ask, we get that name from the fact that we can have children." "So you and I could have a child?" He raised an eyebrow. "Baka, I mean a man and woman!" "Oh, I mean, if we could..." Shingo whapped him in the arm. "We can't!" Tsuyoshi looked at the scars on his wrists. Scars he had no memory of receiving. "When I telepath to you, can all the vampire's hear it?" "If your telepathing only to me, they won't." Shingo paused. "Most new vampire's can't telepath. They have to be taught." "So why can I?" "Perhaps you're gifted." "Finally, gifted in something." He tried to kid. "Don't sell yourself short. You're gifted in a lot of things." Shingo said seriously. He leaned forwards and gave his friend a chaste kiss on the lips. ************************* Goro was working on the computer. He looked up to Shingo when he came into the living room. "How's Tsuyoshi?" "He's asking a lot of questions." Shingo sat at his weight set. He picked up a barbell and began to do arm curls. "That's good news then." Goro smiled. "He's getting back to normal." "I suppose." he said morosely. "I thought you would be happy about it." "What's going to happen when he starts asking Kimura questions?" "He'll answer them." Goro put the barbell down. "If he asks too many, Kimura won't let me stay." "You're Tsuyoshi's best friend. You have to stay." "You saw how Kimura was. He was beyond angry." Shingo's hand went to his neck. Goro got to his feet. He went to Shingo. "Take off your bandage." Without looking at him, Shingo did as he was told. He could hear Goro's intake of air. "It's my fault. I provoked him." "How could anything you do deserve that?" Shingo put his bandage back on. "I told him what I felt for Tsuyoshi. He punished me." "Oh Kami. Kimura's on his Prince of Darkness streak again." Goro shut his eyes, and opened them again. "Why is he saying that?" "He's trying to protect Tsuyoshi." "From you? That doesn't make sense. You would be the one person I would insist on staying with Tsuyoshi." Goro looked him over. "This is how he usually treats me." "Who Kimura?" "He considers me his property." He sat down beside Shingo. "He's your master, not your owner." "Try telling him that." he said. "I was sixteen when he crossed me over. He saved me from Kinjimuto's abuse. But I must pay back my debt." "How much more do you owe him?" "He says I owe him my life. So I must give it to him." Goro looked sad. "I'm not allowed to fall in love." "How can you control love?" "I can't." He said simply. "But you've had girlfriends." Shingo insisted. "Had is the word. If you haven't notice I can't date seriously." His eyes looked sad. "The last one was Kari. We kept our relationship a secret. I didn't want the press to know." Goro said in barely a whisper. "Kimura discovered us together. He went insane with jeliousy. When he found out she was expecting. He crossed her over. Forced her to love him." "Why didn't you say anything to Kari?" "I tried. He's done something to her mind. She thinks the babies his. It's probably better that way." Goro looked around the room. "I won't let him split up the two of you." Shingo could only imagine the pain his friend was going through. He touched him on the shoulder. "Thanks." "Kimura's very dangerous when he's like this." Goro looked into his eyes. "You'll have to be careful. Very careful." "I will." Shingo promised. "I'll help you as much as I can." Goro got back up. "I'll make sure the two of you don't end up like me." ************************* Part Three "What would you do if Kimura gave you your freedom?" Shingo asked Goro. They played a game of cards. "He'll never do that." Goro put his cards down. "Twenty-one. I win." "You got lucky." He dealt the cards. "Pretend for a moment that for some reason Kimura did free you. What would you do?" He held up his handphone. "I'd destroy this." "A hand phone?" "It's a special one. Kimura gave it to me. He gives me my orders through this." He put the phone up. "The strange this is, if he would just ask. I wouldn't mind doing what he orders." "Really?" Shingo raised an eyebrow. "Usually he's a good master. A good friend." Goro put his cards down. "He doesn't always act like the Prince of Darkness. Most of the time, we're almost equals. It's only when I fall in love that there's a problem." "He gets jealous." Shingo guessed. "I don't know why. He's the one that has girls falling all over him." Goro smiled sadly. "That's when it really hurts. I sometimes wonder why I'm not enough for him." "I see." Shingo noticed Kimura coming into the apartment very quietly, as if he was listening to Goro's words. He looked depressed. Goro's words seemed to be affecting him. "There's been times when he wants to take my blood. He always asks. He doesn't force me." Goro's eyes turned sad. "Afterwards, we'll lay in bed, and he'll just hold me. He makes me feel warm and safe. Sometimes I wish that I could stay forever with that Kimura." "Does he know you love him?" Shingo asked. "No. I can't let him know. He would use my love for him against me." Goro smiled sadly. "I'm one of those pathetic prisoners who love their jailers." "You're not pathetic." "I am." He said so softly. "If he let me free, I'm not sure I'd go." "I'm back," Kimura said loudly. He put the bag he was carrying down. He looked at the two men, who had stopped talking. "How's Tsuyoshi?" "He's feeling better." Shingo told him. "Have you fed him yet?" There was concern in Kimura's voice. "Yes, I'm introducing him to cow's blood." "How many times you feed him?" "Only the one time." "He hasn't asked for blood." Goro told him. "He might not be hungry." "Baka, you're not supposed to wait until he asks." He lit a cigarette. Shingo sighed. "He just became a vampire. It's going to take a long time for him to get used to drinking blood." "He'll never get used to it if you keep on babying him." Kimura spat. If Goro's words had made a change in the vampire, Shingo couldn't see it. "I'm not babying him!" "I've told my wife that I'll be staying here for a while. I'll take over Tsuyoshi's care." Kimura spun on his heals and went into the kitchen. Goro followed him. "What is going on?" Shingo could hear Goro ask. "Shingo's an idiot. He has no idea how to take care of a new vampire." "How will he know if you never let him learn?" he countered. "Tsuyoshi isn't a lab rat. He needs someone experienced taking care of him." "If it was someone else, would you let Shingo help?" "Of course I would. Tsuyoshi's different. You know that." "You're right, he's different. He has someone who loves him. Shingo would kill himself before he let Tsuyoshi get hurt." Goro said calmly. "Do you know how easy it would be for Shingo to force Tsuyoshi to love him?" Kimura pointed out. "The way you did with Kari?" Goro hissed. "Can't you ever put anything in the past?" Kimura groaned. "I'm your master. By rights I get first pick over your lovers. If I want them. So be it. You need to get over it." "What are you planning on doing? Making Tsuyoshi one of yours?" There was hurt in Goro's voice. "I'll be damned if you turn him into your toy." "I would never do that." Kimura swore. "Then prove it. Let Shingo take care of Tsuyoshi in peace." Goro challenged. "It's too much of a risk. Shingo needs to keep his place." Kimura said firmly. "I don't want Tsuyoshi's memories to return. It's better for all of us if he doesn't remember." "What memories are those?" "It's none of your business." He growled. "It's too easy for Shingo to control Tsuyoshi." *I would never do that.* Shingo stood up, and went to the kitchen. He walked to Kimura, looking down to the smaller man. "I would never force Tsuyoshi to love me." "How can I believe that? You love him." Kimura told Shingo. "It's only a matter of time before you'll give him your blood." "I wouldn't' do that!" Shingo tried hard to keep his temper. "Why can't you trust me? Why am I such a risk? What makes Tsuyoshi so special?" "You wouldn't' understand." "Try me." Shingo said levelly. "Tsuyoshi's my cousin." Kimura admitted. "We share a bloodtie." "That's not true. They're not related." Goro glared at Kimura. The older vampire's eyes narrowed. "Did he ever tell you he was adopted?" "How did you know about that?" Shingo asked. "When I felt our blood tie, I made him tell me." "You hypnotized him?" Goro asked. "Is there any other way?" "I don't believe this." Shingo closed his eyes and counted to ten. He was about to loose his temper. Taking memories from his friend, forcing him to tell his secrets. It was too much. "Tsuyoshi's a Dracula. You will treat him with respect." Kimura ordered. "So you're protecting him from the lowly commoner. Kimura-sama?" Shingo said sarcastically. "I'm not good enough for a descendent of Dracula?" "You're treading on thin ice!" Kimura snarled. "Kimura! Calm down!" Goro ordered. "I love Tsuyoshi. I've loved him for as long as I've known him." Shingo said firmly. "You won't take him from me." "What do you know about love?" Kimura hissed. "Far more then you will ever know. I didn't have to force someone into loving me." Shingo said in a rush. The punch came out of nowhere. Kimura's fist connecting with Shingo's jaw. As he got to his feet, he could hear Goro pushing Kimura away from the younger man. *Shingo!* He heard Tsuyoshi cry telepathically. *Help me!* ******************* Shingo found himself running to his bedroom. There was a blond woman sitting on Tsuyoshi's midriff. The woman was holding a hammer. It was Diane, Tsuyoshi's girlfriend. With a growl, Shingo pulled the woman off of Tsuyoshi. His best friend lay on the bed, a stake through his heart. Enraged, Shingo bit the woman, draining the life out of her. Then he threw her body on the floor. "Shingo." Kimura gasped. "She's dead." he said hollowly. "Why did you kill her?" "She killed Tsuyoshi." The tears he kept back began to flow. He sank to the floor sobs racked his body. *He's gone. I failed him.* "Goro, dispose of the body." Kimura ordered. "Yes, master." Goro picked up the woman. He went to the window and disappeared. Kimura went to the bed; he reached down and touched Tsuyoshi. "Shingo, he's still alive." "I lied to him. I promised I would take care of him." he sobbed. "*You*, you kept me from keeping that promise!" Kimura went to Shingo he slapped him hard. "Shingo, snap out of it! Tsu's still alive. She missed his heart." "He was staked." "I can get the stake out. But I'll need your help." Kimura's eyes suddenly grew soft. "If you love him, you have to help him live." "What do I do?" He said getting to his feet. "We will take the stake out. Then he'll need vampire's blood. Lots of it." He looked into Shingo's eyes. "He'll need your blood." "Let's do it." Kimura and Shingo sat on either side of Tsuyoshi. Using their combined strength, they tried to pull the stake out. "Damn!" Kimura took out a band and tied his hair back. "We can't get enough leverage." "She was sitting on him when he put it in...." Shingo began. "So if you sit on him, perhaps we can get it out." Kimura finished. "Why me? Why not you? You're stronger then me." "Tell me, who would Tsuyoshi want to sit on him?" The older man pointed out. "Me," He admitted. Shingo got onto the bed, and straddled Tsuyoshi's pelvis. The two vampires grabbed the stake, and this time, it came out. "He needs blood. Now." Kimura ordered. Shingo knew if he gave Tsuyoshi his blood that Kimura would insist they never be together. He didn't need a moment of thought. He climbed off of Tsuyoshi. Then he opened his wrist, and let the blood trickle into his friend's mouth. After a few long moments, the smaller man swallowed. With his free hand, Shingo began to stroke his hair. *That's it. Tsu, drink.* He could feel Kimura get off of the bed. He returned a few minutes later, carrying a bottle. Using his fangs, he opened the bottle, and poured the blood into Tsuyoshi's wound. *I love you. Even after I am forced to leave. I want you to remember my love.* He told Tsuyoshi telepathically. *Vampires live forever. Perhaps someday I'll be able to come back to you.* The room seemed to be spinning, and Shingo realized that he had too much blood. He could feel Kimura pulling him away from Tsuyoshi. Then the man pressed a bottle into Shingo's hand. It didn't take any encouragement to drink. "He still needs blood." He was surprised to see Kimura cut his own wrist open, then put it against Tsuyoshi's lips. The injured man drank. When Kimura was finished feeding Tsuyoshi. He moved away from the man. "He should be fine now." Shingo leaned down and kissed Tsuyoshi on the lips. Then he turned to Kimura. "I'll go now." "Stay, he needs you." Kimura used a handkerchief and bandaged his wrist. "It's better if I leave before he wakes." He was beginning to feel woozy from the blood loss. "His being alive is reward enough for me. I'll leave the group. You don't have to fire me. I'll find something else to do." "Will he forgive you if you go?" "I don't have a choice." The room still spun. Shingo steadied himself on the bed. "You told me that I had to leave him forever if I gave him my blood." "I was being overly protective of him." "It's your right. Like you, he's royalty." He looked away from Kimura. "I need to keep my place around him too." "Your place is at his side." Kimura said softly. "He's loved you for a very long time." Shingo looked up to Kimura in surprise. "He doesn't love me." "Remember when they made Tsuyoshi move into my room?" "I was only sixteen when that happened." He wondered why the vampire would bring that up now. "Do you remember?" *How could I forget my first love?* Shingo thought, then he looked at Kimura. "It was a horrible time. My relationship with him changed forever. I've never been as close to him as I was then." "Tsuyoshi had nightmares. He would scream your name in his sleep. One day, he told me he just wished he could forget all the abuse we suffered." Kimura's eyes looked haunted. "So I helped him. I didn't realize I would take his memories of his love for you." "He loved me." Tears stung Shingo's eyes. The past made sense to him now. How close they used to be. Then suddenly, they're being only friends. "He really loved me." "In time he fell in love with you all over again. But like you, he didn't want to destroy your friendship." Kimura reached out, touching Shingo. "Stay with him. Keep him safe. Help him recover. He needs your love, your strength." "I wont' be sent away?" "I am sorry I ever threatened you. I was jealous of the bond you have with him." A tear trickled down his cheek. "I've never had anyone love me on their own." "What about Goro?" "No, I had to force him to be my friend." he took out a cigarette and lit it. "I even took his fiancée. I've done too much to ever be forgiven." "You love him." Shingo guessed. "He's my life." He admitted. He took a long drag on his cigarette. "Then give him his freedom." Shingo suggested. "He'll never come back to me." "You underestimate Goro. He just needs time to forgive you." The taller man told him. "He won't ever forgive you while being your prisoner." "You have my word that I'll set him free." Kimura walked to the door. "Take care of my cousin for me." "I will." Shingo promised. With that, Kimura left the room. He shut the bedroom door, giving the pair privacy. Shingo turned back to Tsuyoshi. He leaned down, kissing his lips. "When you get better, we can be together. I do love you." *Love you too.* he heard his lover say in his mind, before he fell asleep. ******************** Part Four ***************** Tsuyoshi woke. There was a pain in his chest. He felt as if every bone in his torso had been crushed. He reached up, touching the still healing wound. Beside him was curled Shingo. His face less then an inch from his. Blond hair spilled onto the older man's face. He reached up, touching his friend. Shingo's eyes flickered open. "How do you feel?" "I'll live." he tried to kid. "No, really." Shingo sat up on one arm. "Does it hurt?" "My chest is beyond hurting." He admitted. "I thought vampires died when they are staked." "Not always. Sometimes the good guys win." Shingo tried to smile. "Especially when they're able to get the stake out." "I can remember you where sitting on me. Then there was a lot of pain." "I'm not the one that staked you. Honest, I didn't stake you. I just walked into my bedroom and there you where. You had been staked. What else could I do? You didn't expect me to just leave you there?" Shingo said in his best Nakai imitation. "I know that Baka." He told his friend. "You saved me." "I couldn't have forgiven myself if I hadn't." his eyes where concerned. "Kimura helped. Without him, you wouldn't be here." "Why would he do that?" Tsuyoshi gasped. "I've sensed so much evil from him." "He's your friend. Of course he would help you." Shingo paused. "The evil you feel is in his blood. He can't help it." "Diane, she'll be back." "She'll never be back." Shingo promised. "How can you be so sure?" Shingo looked away from him. "I killed her." "I can't believe you would kill anyone." "I thought she had killed you." "When will the police be here?" "Won't be. Goro disposed of the body." Shingo took his hand and kissed it. He could feel Shingo's fear of being condemned for the murder. But what could Tsuyoshi say? He was just as guilty. He had to tell Shingo the truth. "I've killed too. When I first crossed over, I was starving. I'm not sure how many I killed. My hunger was so great." "So you're the vampire who killed all those people in the park." "At least you had a good reason for killing. I didn't." "The first hunger is the strongest. You only did what your body demanded." Shingo reached out, tracing the angles of Tsuyoshi's face. "So that kind of hunger won't happen again?" "Of course not." Shingo thought for a moment. "About the staking. I should have been there for you. If I had, all this might not have happened." "You can't blame yourself for what happened to me." Tsuyoshi realized what Shingo was trying to say. "Instead of worry about that. Why don't' we work on having a future?" He could see fear in Shingo's eyes. "Are you sure you want to have a future with me?" "We can't go back. Pretending we don't love each other." He told the taller man. "I'm tired of only being your friend." "So am I." The taller man agreed. "I should have told you my feelings a long time ago. Why didn't you tell me?" "I was afraid I would loose you." Tsuyoshi said softly. "Now, I want to take that risk. I love you, Katori Shingo." Shingo's face lit up. His smile spreading to his eyes. "I love you too." "It feels so good to hear you say those words." The smaller man tried to snuggle closer to Shingo. "Wait until your well." He began to stroke Tsuyoshi's face. "We've got our whole life Tsu-chan. A few more days won't hurt." "Tsu-chan." the man smiled. "I like that." **************** Shingo could still feel the presence of two other vampires in his apartment. He went into the living room. Kimura was sitting in a chair, smoking. Goro was using Shingo's computer to read something on the Internet. Goro looked at Shingo and got to his feet. "He's awake. I'm going." "What?" Shingo asked. "Kimura said I couldn't leave before you woke up." He reached for his backpack. "You're here, so I'm leaving." Kimura put his cigarette in the ashtray. Then he stood up. "Wait a minute." "I knew there had to be a catch." Goro rolled his eyes. He dropped the backpack. "What do you want me to do now?" "Give me the bracelet." He held his hand out. Goro took the chain bracelet off of his right wrist. He gave it to Kimura. "This was a symbol of your slavery to me." Kimura went to the window. He opened it. Then he threw the bracelet as far as he could. He turned back to Goro. "My handphone." Goro gave it to him. "What do you want with that?" "This." Kimura pulled the back off of the handphone. He took as much of the insides of the phone out, then threw it away. "I wanted to do this in front of a witness. That way, I could never take it back." "I don't understand." Goro said. "A very wise man told me that if I love you, that I should give you your freedom." Kimura glanced at Shingo for a moment. "I should have listened to him a long time ago." "You love me?" Goro repeated. "I'm setting you free. I'm no longer your master. You are free to love, and I hope you do find love someday." Kimura said quietly. "You don't owe me a thing. In fact it is I who owe you. Perhaps someday, in many years. You might forgive me enough to be my friend." "Kimura, I..."Goro began. "I'm going. Don't come after me. Just remember that I love you. I'll always be your friend." With that, Kimura went to the window, and disappeared into the night sky. Goro turned to Shingo. "He loves me?" "He told me you're his life." Shingo admitted. "Why couldn't he just tell me? Why did he have to put me through all this?" Goro asked. "If he had told me, I would have willingly done what he asked." "I think that Kimura doesn't see himself as being worthy to be loved." Shingo told him. "He's never had anyone love him on their own." "All this makes a sick sense somehow." Goro closed his eyes for a moment. "He's wrong. I do love that egotistical, megalomaniac, self centered Baka." "What are you going to do?" "Give him some time to calm down." Goro opened his eyes. "Then perhaps the two of us can start fresh. I want to be his friend." ************************* Tsuyoshi sat on the bed; his back supported by pillows. Shingo had fussed over him like a small child. It was two days after the staking. He had just started feeling like reading. Shingo had given him a stack of tabloids. They seemed to all call Shingo the group's funnyman, fuss over Goro and Kimura, and make some mention of Nakai. There was always something about him in the stories. The nicest of the papers called him the ugly one. Shingo sat beside him, half watching the television, half watching him. He sat close to him. A little too close. Tsuyoshi didn't mind. It made him feel safe. *How can anyone love me?* He told himself as he read yet another slam against him. *I'm too ugly.* Shingo looked into his eyes. "That isn't true." "I am ugly. I'm too thin, my face is too bony." he read from the tabloid. . "This story called me the pointy faced member of SMAP. Who can love someone with a face like a witches?" "You look like a Vulcan." Shingo smiled. "Do you ever go into pon farr?" Tsuyoshi groaned at the joke. "I was being serious." "I was being serious Tsu-chan. My first crush was on Mr. Spock. Next, I went gaga over the lead singer of the Cars." He began to caress his friend's arm. "Then I met you, and my dreams came true. Not everyone might love your look, but they don't understand. They are too busy looking at the outside, looking for the pretty boys. They aren't looking on the inside. They don't realize there is more to life then boy-chans." "You really think Mr. Spock is sexy?" "He's very sexy. But he doesn't hold a candle to you." He took Tsuyoshi's hand and kissed it. "You've taken my blood. You know I'm telling you the truth." "All I got from your blood was your concern for me." "Well, you almost died." Shingo kissed his fingers again. "Next time you take my blood, I'll show you how you look to me." "Can I ask you something else?" Shingo's eyes where honest. "You can ask me anything." "You've always had a girlfriend and a boyfriend." He looked away from his friend. He couldn't ask the rest of the question. "Do you mean, will I still date?" "I don't have a right to ask." "I like to go dancing. But from now on, I won't go unless you're with me." He vowed. "You're different. You're not just a date. You're the other half of my soul." A wave of hunger overcame Tsuyoshi. He felt his teeth grow. He tried turning from Shingo, but his friend took his head in his hand. "Why can't I control my hunger?" "You're still a new vampire. In time, you'll learn." Shingo offered him his wrist. "I don't want to drink from your wrist. It feels like I'm using you when I do." "Then don't use me." Shingo kissed Tsuyoshi. *How can you stand to kiss me? My fangs." he telepathed as he kissed his friend. *Their sexy.* Shingo's lips left his, then he put his hand on the back of Tsuyoshi's head. He guided him to his neck. *Feed, my love.* Tsuyoshi bit down. Shingo gasped, and began to caress his friends' hair. He couldn't' believe the way he looked through Shingo's eyes. To his friend, he looked exotic, mysterious, and sexy. Everything he had seen as a drawback was a bonus in Shingo's eyes. He pulled away from Shingo. The younger man reached out, wiping the blood from the new vampire's chin. "Now you know how sexy you really are. I love it when you make love to me." "We didn't make love." Tsuyoshi told him. "I just took some blood." "Sharing blood is even better to us then sex. We vampires consider it making love." Shingo explained. "Every time I take your blood, I make love to you?" "Yes, you do." Tsuyoshi made up his mind. "I want you to make love to me." Shingo moved away from his friend. "Later, when you recover." "What about your need?" Shingo took Tsuyoshi's hand. His fingers caressed his. "You fulfilled my need. The rest, I can wait for."