Title - Shadows of the Mind (2/4)
Author - Katrinka
Authors Email: Katrinka@flash.net
Rating - G first three parts, NC-17 last part
Classification - MSR
Spoilers - The Sixth Extinction II: Amor Fati
Keywords - A/U what if
Sequel to Doors and Walls 
Archiving Gossamer, Ephemeral, and LEGACY only. Any other archiving must
have authors express permission first. I will probably give it!
Summary - After breaking her ankle, Scully's relationship with Mulder changes.



Scully was bored half out of her mind. She was tired of sitting in bed, tired of Mulder being gone. 

*Why did I have to insist he go to work today? * Scully asked herself. 

Scully decided to see if Mulder had any books in his night table. She opened the drawer. The first thing she found was a rather large envelope from a court. It puzzled her. It was postmarked a year before, but Mulder hadn't been in court then. Scully opened up the envelope. She slowly read the paper. It was a divorce decree. The names on it where Mulder's and Diana Fowley. Her fingers began to tremble.  

Scully had known that Mulder had been involved with Fowley. He had told her that it had ended years before. According to her partner, they had slept together once. A marriage that had lasted 8 years was another. 

Scully decided that since she had the drawer open, she might as well see if she could find something else. There was a pile of letters from Fowley; the first one postmarked a year after their wedding date. The final letter postmarked a few weeks after Scully had become Mulder's partner. 

Scully opened the final letter. The letter was tear-stained. It told Mulder that Diana needed to tell him the truth that she had been living with someone the entire time she had been stationed in Europe. She was tired of playing games, pretending that she was devoted to him. If she came back to America, it wouldn't be for their relationship, it would be because she had been transferred there. 

The ring, it all made sense now. That ring that he wore on a chain around his neck hadn't really belonged to a family member. It was his. 

Scully heard the door open. She quickly put the items away. Mulder had lied to her. Scully was angry that Mulder couldn't trust her enough to tell her about being married. 

Mulder came into the bedroom. "How's the foot?"

"It hurts."

"Perhaps we should call another doctor in the morning." Mulder offered.

"Perhaps we should." Scully agreed icily.

"Are you going into work tomorrow?"

"Not if I have to go to the doctor." 

"What's wrong?" Mulder asked concerned.

Scully sighed and rolled her eyes. "There's nothing wrong."

"If your foots hurting, I could get you some aspirin."

"No, it's not that."

Mulder sat down on the bed. He reached out, touching her hand. "What is it?"

Scully pulled her hand away from him. "I told you, it's nothing."

"I'm your partner, you can trust me."

"*Me* trust *you*, now that's rich." Scully snorted.

"When have I ever lied to you?" Mulder countered.

"What about your ex-wife? Good god, you never even told me you where married!" Scully shouted. "My god! How could you be married to Diana Fowley! The bitch queen of the universe!"

Mulder flinched. "Who told you."

"I was looking for a book. I found your divorce decree." Scully couldn't keep the anger out of her voice. "You say you don't lie to me, but you can't trust me enough to tell me you where married."

"I didn't tell you, because I knew you wouldn't understand."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You would ask questions. I didn't want to answer them."

"Your telling me that you didn't inform me of something that major in your life, simply because your worried about my questions?"

Mulder looked depressed, very depressed. "Yes, and now you know, you might as well ask them."

"Why doesn't your FBI record say anything about your being married?"

"The upper echelon removed it from my record once Diana was stationed in Europe."

"That doesn't make any sense." Scully tried to control her temper. "Why would the FBI purge a marriage from someone's record?"

Mulder looked away from her. "Diana worked part of the time in Eastern Europe. It could have been a danger to her." 

"The FBI doesn't do work in Eastern Europe." She reminded him.

"Diana was! She was stationed in Eastern Europe! I've been there." Mulder looked around the room. "I can't even count the number of times I caught her in bed with someone else. My marriage to Diana Fowley was hell on Earth. I loved her, and she abused that love. She taught me that love was a thing that leads to pain."

"That's not true, love doesn't lead to pain."

"My wife ripped my heart out of my body, jumped up and down on it in glee. She did that because I loved her!" There was pain in Mulder's voice. "Trusting someone enough to let them share your heart only leads to pain! I didn't tell you about her, because it hurt! Do you understand? It still hurts! How could I tell you about the pain? Why should I believe you would understand?" 

"Because you promised me total honesty."

Mulder looked away from Scully. "I'm sorry I did. I broke your trust, I never meant to do that."

"How long did you live with her?" 

"About a year. She was transferred to Europe after that. I would see her once every three months. Near the end, she lived openly with her lover." Mulder's voice cracked. "I trusted her. I can't believe I trusted her!" 

"Why didn't it take you so long to get divorced?"

"Because she refused the divorced papers. I couldn't contest it until she returned to the states." Mulder began to sob. "She told me, she kept telling me that she would tell you about our marriage. I wanted to tell you, I knew you wouldn't understand." 

The anger Scully had felt disappeared. She pulled Mulder to her. "I hate her, I hate what she did to you." 

Mulder held Scully as if his life was depending on it. "I know you can no longer trust me. I'm so sorry."

****************
"Stairs are pure shit. They are created by some paper-pusher who wants to make the disabled life pure hell." Dana Scully thought as she made her way down the steps of the stairs to be basement. The elevator was out of order. Why today of all days did it have to be out of order? Today, Scully hated stairs. Hated them with a purple passion that only someone who has an ace bandage on one leg, and crutches can. 

Scully stopped at the bottom to get her barring. It was only a few feet to Mulder's office. She could make it that far, then perhaps sit down. She slowly made her way to the door. Stood tall, and turned the handle. 

Fox Mulder was working at the computer. She couldn't see what he was writing, only the fact that he kept glancing at the photo of her that he had discretely placed beside the computer. No one would know it was there, hiding between the pictures of aliens and witnesses. 

//Mulder, Mulder why do you have to be you? // 

//Why couldn't you be my knight in shining armor? // 

Scully watched the thin fingers dance of the keyboard. He had the fingers of an artist. She could still remember his arms around her, gently picking her up, and carrying her with the care of a man holding his first born. She could still remember the beating of his heart as she lay against his chest. 

Mulder hadn't laughed at her, not one giggle at the predicament that she had found herself in. Instead, he had been there for her. Staying with her the hours at the emergency room. 

Scully lost her concentration for a second, and one of her crutches fell to the floor with a loud BANG! Mulder quickly spun around, reaching for his gun. He aimed it towards the person, then lowered it when he saw who the intruder was. "Scully what are you doing here?"

"I work here?" she tried to say lightly. Her mind began to race. How was she going to pick her crutch up without making herself look like a fool? 

Balancing herself using the remaining crutch, Scully bent down and reached for the fallen crutch. Mulder leapt to his feet; he picked up the crutch, and handed it to Scully. As he looked into her eyes he said. "You shouldn't be here."

"Where else would I be?"

"Resting your leg for one!" There was concern in written in Mulder's voice. "Your ankle can never get better if you're running around!"

"I asked a doctor, she said it's all right for me to work." Scully smiled her best smile at him. 

Mulder looked her over, really looked at her. "Let me guess, you asked yourself if you could go to work."

"Sure, why not?"

"Your hopeless." Mulder rolled his eyes and went back to his desk. "Fine, stay here. Help me with my paperwork. You be the one to write the report telling how your partner shoved you sidewalk and broke your ankle!"

"All right, I will!" Scully said stubbornly. 
***************

Mulder glanced over to Scully. The report she was supposed to be working on was open on her desk. Instead of working on it, his partner was drying her eyes with a tissue. 

//Why would Scully be crying? // 

Mulder knew it was wrong, but he opened himself to his partner. He could feel waves of pain coming from her. Mulder got to his feet, and walked to Scully. He gently placed a hand on her arm. The contact closer, he could feel that Scully was in agony. 

"Scully, perhaps you should take a break." He suggested.

"I'll be fine." She lied. 

"You need to go to the doctor."

"I'm fine, my foot's just sprained."

"You're in agony. I think it's much more then a sprain."

"How do you know about that?" Scully looked into his eyes. 

"I felt it."

"Oh god, that thing you where exposed to. Have you been hearing voices?"

"It's more like a side effect of the alien artifact." Mulder tried to explain himself, he felt very strange doing it. "When I was hospitalized, I couldn't control it. I could hear thousands of voices, millions of voices. The thoughts of anyone around me. This is different. If I open myself, I can read people's thoughts. If I don't want to hear them, I just close my mind."

"Why didn't you tell me about this?" Scully seemed annoyed again.

"I *did* tell you after I was found. You didn't believe me." 

Scully shook her head. Mulder could see her going through the memories in her mind. The fact that she went 'whoa boy" when he had told her the truth. "What was I to think? You no longer have the exceptional brain waves. I thought you where exaggerating."

"Perhaps the my brain uses parts that the monitors couldn't detect." Mulder shook his head. "I don't know why I'm telepathic, just that I am."

"Do you always read people's minds?"

"I'd rather not hear what people have to think.  Everyone's got a right to privacy." Mulder could feel a grudging belief from his partner. "I'm sorry I read your mind. I won't do it again without permission."

"Did you open yourself to my pain?"

"No, it is so strong that it went through my barriers." Mulder looked her over. "Why don't you go to the doctor here, at least get a second opinion."

"If I did that, would you stop treating me like something breakable?"

Mulder couldn't help but smile. "Promise."