"trying to find an honest word to find, the truth enslaved..."
                                        - Sarah McLachlan

DISCLAIMER - the content in this page isnt really meant for the general public, but do feel free to read it, and to get a sence of where i am comming from. the words on this page are aimed at Christians (and no i am not Christian bashing, i am one myself)

i admit it is quite cocky of me to present my set of beliefs as the truth. i also admit that i am likely quite off of the mark on a few of these things. my questions will be answerd only in death, and, although this not knowing is very frustrating, i am learning to deal with it. i really think, that we, as human's, arent meant to know everything. i really think that we are too petty and stupid to handle the knowledge of some things. we need to leave the all-knowing stuff up to the only one who really can handle it. that being, as far as i am concerned, is God. (this is the part, where you get all annoyed at me, and decide to write me nasty letters and such) when adam and eve ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, they really did damn us, as a race, to death.

not that i think that knowledge is a bad thing, we wouldnt have been given a mind, if we weren't meant to think, to discover, and to grow with it. you see, it wasnt the knowlege that was the problem of eating the forbidden fruit. it was the pride. when they ate the fruit of the tree, it was with the thinking that they would be like God. and none of us are like God. we are people, selfish, voilent, arrogant, hatefull, ignorant. He is God, giving, gentle, forgiving, loving, all knowing. see the difference? and it was that first sin of pride (not the disobedience of eating from the tree, but the pride of wanting to be God) that made us all of these things.

now comes the part where i piss off the Christians (oh, and i am one, in case you hadn't guessed, i just tend to say and think some things that your averge youth group attending person doesnt like) it isnt the letter of the law that makes us holy, it is the spirit. i refuse to spit in the face of God's grace and lovingness, by saying that in order to get into the Kingdom, you have to obey all these stupid rules, and follow all of these outward pretensions that the church has set. keeping in mind that it was the church who has set them, not God. that is called legalism, and it is wrong. and it is a horribly limited way to live.

*brandy stops ranting for a minute* okay, the spirit of the law. that spirit being love. God judges us by the condition of our heart, not by wether or not we smoke, or wear long black dresses and lots of eyeliner. those are outward things. and keeping in mind sweetheart, that if you judge another for doing things you think of as sinful, you are just as bad, because your attitude towards them isnt at all loving, it is pridefull, and that takes us back to the origional sin of pride when adam and eve ate that fruit. when you judge another person, you are saying "i want to be God", because, afterall, the judging is God's job, is it not?

so, to live as God would have you live, all you have to do is love. it is as simple as that. the 2 greatest commandments were to love God, and to love others, and if you can do those things, you are doing a pretty darn good job as far as i am concerned. and all of the other details should just follow if you have love. if you love your neighbor, you aren't going to steal from, or murder him. and you aren't going to sleep with his/her mate either. and you arent going to gossip about him, and you arent going to have all of this pride about being better than him. what you are going to do, is treat him with kindness, gentleness, and respect. and THAT is the mark of a good Christian.

i do hope i didnt sound as though i needed a soap box for all of that, i really was directing that more at God's kids, than the one's who don't know him