Heino Uber Page
Onceupona time...
My friends Tess and Michael were browsing through some old records at the local Goodwill. Previous excavations had yielded us everything from Jethro Tull's "Aqualung" to various Ella Fitzgerald 45's... I had even heard of a guy who once found a clean, unscatched "Sgt. Pepper" hidden among the unknowns in a Kenny Rogers sleeve. But on this day Luck granted us something more valuable than any of these.
Tess and Michael burst into my house, laughing and each urging the other to introduce whatever was wrapped in the plastic bag Tess carried. It was obvious from the shape of the sack that the two of them had come upon some too-great-to-leave-without LP... I thought perhaps a Jackson 5 or maybe even Neil Diamond. But no... as the record slid out of the bag, the cover revealed to us was far too much for the average human to comprehend...
It was Heino.
The album read "Heino Super Hits," which seemed pretty funny in itself, but the real power is contained still in the picture that graces its cover. It is Heino, hailed as "the German Singing Sensation," wearing a whitish wig, Jackie-O sunglasses, a double-breasted, double-knit polyester pants suit with black silk shirt, and a Mona Lisa-like smile. Mysterious.
We immediately began a laughter that is reborn each time we look up to see the record cover hanging on our wall. It's just plain funny. Unfortunately, we do not have an image of it online, but one will appear soon, no doubt. But even better than the picture was the image combined with the actual music. Apparently, Hieno is a German "Volksinger," popular with either the very old or the very drunk. We hear from reliable sources that 99% of Germans know who Heino is... why has he failed to reach the US audience?
Never fear, I am here to bring Heino's hilarity to America. Soon you will be able to click on links below to hear two clips from his some of his greatest hits. They are even funnier when played on 45rpm, as would be imagined.
Some links:
The Cosmic Order of Heino
The Heino Worship Page
This page was created by Susan Floyd, Heino worshipper. All rights reserved. Comments may be mailed to littlecabbage@mail.utexas.edu. October 27, 1997.
a time...
My friends Tess and Michael were browsing through some old records at the local Goodwill. Previous excavations had yielded us everything from Jethro Tull's "Aqualung" to various Ella Fitzgerald 45's... I had even heard of a guy who once found a clean, unscatched "Sgt. Pepper" hidden among the unknowns in a Kenny Rogers sleeve. But on this day Luck granted us something more valuable than any of these.
Tess and Michael burst into my house, laughing and each urging the other to introduce whatever was wrapped in the plastic bag Tess carried. It was obvious from the shape of the sack that the two of them had come upon some too-great-to-leave-without LP... I thought perhaps a Jackson 5 or maybe even Neil Diamond. But no... as the record slid out of the bag, the cover revealed to us was far too much for the average human to comprehend...
It was Heino.
The album read "Heino Super Hits," which seemed pretty funny in itself, but the real power is contained still in the picture that graces its cover. It is Heino, hailed as "the German Singing Sensation," wearing a whitish wig, Jackie-O sunglasses, a double-breasted, double-knit polyester pants suit with black silk shirt, and a Mona Lisa-like smile. Mysterious.
We immediately began a laughter that is reborn each time we look up to see the record cover hanging on our wall. It's just plain funny. Unfortunately, we do not have an image of it online, but one will appear soon, no doubt. But even better than the picture was the image combined with the actual music. Apparently, Hieno is a German "Volksinger," popular with either the very old or the very drunk. We hear from reliable sources that 99% of Germans know who Heino is... why has he failed to reach the US audience?
Never fear, I am here to bring Heino's hilarity to America. Soon you will be able to click on links below to hear two clips from his some of his greatest hits. They are even funnier when played on 45rpm, as would be imagined.
Some links:
The Cosmic Order of Heino
The Heino Worship Page
This page was created by Susan Floyd, Heino worshipper. All rights reserved. Comments may be mailed to littlecabbage@mail.utexas.edu. October 27, 1997.