You're A Redneck If... Taglines

"Up against the wall, redneck mama san!" -- Joel Robinson

How do you know a Redneck?  The child calls her father "Uncle Daddy"

Redneck bisexual: one who likes both sheep and cows.

Redneck DOS 6.2: Y'all Reckon?: (Y)ep (N)ope

Redneck foreplay: "Ain't no cars coming, baby!"

Redneck foreplay: "Get in the truck, bitch!"

Redneck foreplay: <*nudge*> "Hey! Are you awake?"

Redneck love -- It's a Family affair.

Redneck marriage proposal.........YER WHUT!!??????

Redneck pickup line: "Hey, you look just like my sister."

Redneck Restaurant Conundrum: "What wine goes with chitlins?"

Redneck Restaurant Conundrum: "What wine goes with Moon Pies?"

Redneck Restaurant Conundrum: "What wine goes with possum?"

Redneck Restaurant Conundrum: "What wine goes with `coon?"

Redneck Seven Course Dinner: Possum and a six pack!

Redneck virgin: a girl who can outrun her brothers.

Redneck--7 cars in the front yard--you ride your horse to work.

Redneck: (n); a person whose family tree doesn't fork.

Redneck: Mom's Xmas list has 10 boxes of .357 magnums.

Sign of a Redneck: Circular Family Tree

The Elvis hotline limits rednecks to one call per day.

The U.F.O. hotline limits rednecks to one call per day.

URA Redneck if a 6-pack and a bug zapper makes quality entertainment.

URA redneck if a waiter asks for a wine choice and you say Budweiser, 95

URA Redneck if after making love you ask to roll down the car window.

URA Redneck if after sex, the red light on your roof goes on.

Ura Redneck if anyone in your family wrestles alligators of a living.

Ura Redneck if anything outside the Lower 48 is 'overseas.'

URA Redneck if common household phrase is "Somebody jiggle that".

URA Redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of admired people.

URA Redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of most admired people.

URA Redneck if kudzu is in your family crest.

URA Redneck if less than half the cars you own run.

URA Redneck if Redman Chewing Tobacco sends you a Christmas card.

Ura Redneck if stealing road signs is a family outing.

URA Redneck if taxidermist bill exceeds annual income.

Ura Redneck if the cockroaches left a note saying 'Clean this place up!'

Ura Redneck if the family business requires a lookout.

Ura Redneck if the original color of you carpet is an unsolved mystery.

URA Redneck if the primary color of your car is "bondo".

URA Redneck if the taillight covers on your car are made of tape.

URA Redneck if there's a wasp nest in your living room.

URA Redneck if truckers tell your wife to watch her language.

Ura Redneck if U consider beer and a bug-zapper quality entertainment.

URA Redneck if while mowing lawn, you find three cars

URA Redneck if you answer the door with a baseball bat in your hand.

Ura redneck if you can drink rubbing alcahol.

URA Redneck if you can drink rubbing alcohol.

Ura Redneck if you can eat a McDonald's cheeseburger in one bite.

URA Redneck if you can have sex without spilling your beer.

URA Redneck if you can't visit relatives without your car getting muddy

URA Redneck if you come back from the dump with more than you took.

URA Redneck if you consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.

URA Redneck if you consider a family reunion a chance to meet women.

Ura Redneck if you converted your carport into a beauty shop.

URA Redneck if you do most of your shopping at a truck stop.

URA Redneck if you dog doubles as your dishwasher.

Ura Redneck if you don't need a clean shirt to go to work.

URA Redneck if you drove to elementary school.

URA Redneck if you entertain with tapes of championship bowling.

URA Redneck if you entertain yourself for an hour with a fly swatter.

URA Redneck if you ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

URA Redneck if you get an estimate from the barber to cut your hair.

URA Redneck if you get Odor-Eaters as a christmas present.

URA Redneck if you get your oil changed by your barber.

URA Redneck if you had to remove the Marlboro to kiss the bride.

Ura Redneck if you have a bumper sticker on your bowling ball.

URA Redneck if you have a civil war chess set.

URA Redneck if you have a gunrack on your bicycle!

URA Redneck if you have a hefty bag for car window.

URA Redneck if you have a Hefty Bag instead of a passenger window.

URA Redneck if you have a picture of Elvis on velvet...in plain sight.

Ura Redneck if you have a tire swing in you house.

URA Redneck if you have a velvet bedspread.

URA Redneck if you have any relatives named Elmer or Jed.

Ura Redneck if you have lost a tooth opening a beer.

Ura Redneck if you have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.

Ura redneck if you have manure on your shoes as a fashion statement!

Ura Redneck if you have Mason jars filled with stuff the FBI can't ID.

URA Redneck if you have more appliances in the yard than in the house.

URA Redneck if you have more than twelve dogs on your porch.

URA Redneck if you have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.

URA Redneck if you have to move the transmission to take a bath.

URA Redneck if you have `dress' boots.

URA Redneck if you hold a frog and _it_ worries about getting warts.

URA Redneck if you keep catfish in your aquarium.

URA Redneck if you keep your thermostat on 85 in the winter.

Ura Redneck if you know how to milk a goat.

URA Redneck if you list your parole officer as a reference

URA Redneck if you love your pets more than your family.

Ura Redneck if you mother has ever been arrested for poaching.

URA Redneck if you mow your lawn and find a car.

URA Redneck if you own 3 TV's and only 2 books.

URA Redneck if you own a homemade fur coat.

URA Redneck if you own more TV's than books.

Ura Redneck if you paint your car with house paint.

URA Redneck if you prefer car keys to Q-tips.

URA Redneck if you prefer to _walk_ the excess length off your jeans.

URA Redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

URA Redneck if you quit your job to avoid paying child support.

URA Redneck if you record WWF Wrestling while you're at work.

URA Redneck if you refer to your van as 'The Love Machine.'

Ura Redneck if you sell rabbits out of your car.

URA Redneck if you serve Gallo and colby at your cheese & wine parties.

URA Redneck if you show your belt buckle when asked for I.D.

URA Redneck if you show your beltbuckle as an ID.

URA Redneck if you skipped school in the 8th grade to vote.

URA redneck if you think "Deliverence" was a love story.

URA Redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

URA Redneck if you think BMW is the call letters for a radio station.

URA Redneck if you think Country and Western are the two kinds of Music.

URA Redneck if you think cow tipping should be an Olympic sport.

URA Redneck if you think Deliverance was a love story.

URA Redneck if you think Ernest is funny.

Ura Redneck if you think French onion dip is and exotic tobacco product.

URA Redneck if you think heaven looks a lot like Daytona Beach, Florida.

Ura Redneck if you think people who have electricity are uppity.

URA Redneck if you think Virginia Slims is a new brand of condoms.

URA Redneck if you think Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.

URA Redneck if you think your boyfriend hits you 'because he cares'.

URA Redneck if you think your boyfriend hits you `cause he cares.

URA Redneck if you use more than one can of hairspray per week.

URA Redneck if you view duct tape as a long-term investme

URA Redneck if you voted Tammy Bakker as `Year's Best Dressed Woman'

URA Redneck if you want the national anthem to be "Free Bird."

URA Redneck if you want to be a DJ when you grow up.

URA Redneck if you want to be DJ when you grow up.

URA Redneck if you were holding a beer in your wedding picture.

Ura Redneck if you write off a radiator as a business expense.

URA Redneck if you're arrested for getting relief in an ice machine.

URA Redneck if you're entertained by a 6 pack and a bug zapper.

URA Redneck if you're holding a beer in your wedding picture.

Ura Redneck if you're still upset about 'Gunsmoke' being canceled.

URA Redneck if you're too drunk to fish.

URA Redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.

Ura Redneck if You've been arrested for reliving yourself in an ice box.

URA Redneck if you've ever BBQ'd Spam on the grill.

Ura Redneck if you've ever been arrested on an obscene mud-flap charge.

URA Redneck if you've ever been too drunk to fish.

URA Redneck if you've ever bought a used cap.

Ura Redneck if you've ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.

URA Redneck if you've ever cut your grass and found a car.

Ura Redneck if you've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.

URA Redneck if you've ever given rat traps as a gift. <-{ROFL!}

Ura Redneck if you've ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

Ura Redneck if you've ever lost your wife in a poker game.

Ura Redneck if you've ever names a child for a good dog.

URA Redneck if you've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.

URA Redneck if you've ever rolled your riding lawn mower.

URA Redneck if you've ever shot a deer from inside your house.

URA Redneck if you've ever used lard in bed.

URA Redneck if you've ever vacationed in a rest area.

URA Redneck if you've ever worn a cowboy hat to church.

URA Redneck if you've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.

URA Redneck if you've never paid for a haircut.

URA Redneck if you've spray painted your girl's name on an overpass.

URA Redneck if you've worn something to church having sequins on it.

URA Redneck if your 9x9 living room has a Spanish decor.

URA Redneck if your all-time favorite movie is "Cannonball Run".

URA Redneck if your appearance got you fired from a construction job.

URA Redneck if your baby's favorite teething ring is a garden hose.

URA Redneck if your baby's first words are "Attention K-Mart shoppers".

URA Redneck if your belt buckle is heavier than 4 lbs.

URA Redneck if your best suit is a Budweiser cap & an orange vest.

URA Redneck if your bother-in-law is also your uncle.

URA Redneck if your bumper stick says "My other car is a combine".

URA Redneck if your car has never had a full tank of gas.

URA Redneck if your car's rear tires are twice as wide as the front.

URA Redneck if your chain to your wallet is as big as your dog chain.

URA Redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

URA Redneck if your dad walks U to school b/c you're in the same grade

URA Redneck if your diploma includes the words "Trucking Institute"

URA Redneck if your dog and wallet are both on a chain

URA Redneck if your dog can smoke a cigarette.

URA Redneck if your dog sleeps closer to you than your wife does.

URA Redneck if your driveway is bordered by half-buried tractor tires.

Ura Redneck if your ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

URA Redneck if your family tree doesn't fork.

URA Redneck if your family tree is hollow.

URA Redneck if your father is in the same grade as you.

URA Redneck if your father made your personalized license plate.

URA Redneck if your favorite Chinese meal comes from "LaChoy".

URA Redneck if your first grandchild is born on your 26th birthday.

URA Redneck if your flashlight holds more then four batteries.

URA Redneck if your front license plate has Foxy Lady in airbrush.

URA Redneck if your front porch collapses and kill more than 3 dogs

URA Redneck if your funeral has more pickup trucks than cars.

URA Redneck if your genepool is only a foot deep and usually empty.

URA Redneck if your have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.

URA Redneck if your Home Library is a Bible and the Farmers' Almanac.

URA Redneck if your home needs a hitch.

URA Redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does

URA Redneck if your house moves and your 27 cars do not.

URA Redneck if your house warming involves removing the tires.

URA Redneck if your idea of going formal is a black truck.

URA Redneck if your idea of health food is pork rinds.

URA Redneck if your Junior-Senior Prom had a Day-Care Center

URA Redneck if your kid takes a siphon hose to "Show & Tell".

URA Redneck if your kids are described as "dumb as a brick".

Ura Redneck if your kids have a three-day-old Kool-Aid mustache.

URA Redneck if your Levi's have Skoal can prints on the pockets.

URA Redneck if your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

URA Redneck if your living room sofa is covered by a foam backed throw.

URA Redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch

Ura Redneck if your local funeral home has a neon sign in the window.

Ura Redneck if your mailbox is made out of old auto parts.

Ura Redneck if your mat says, 'You'd better have a search warrant.'

URA Redneck if your mom has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

URA Redneck if your mother doesn't put on shoes to go grocery shopping.

URA Redneck if your mother genuinely admires your girlfriends tattoos

URA Redneck if your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

URA Redneck if your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.

URA Redneck if your muffler is held on by a coat hanger.

URA Redneck if your neighbors have ever asked to borrow the lightbulb.

URA Redneck if your next family reunion is a chance to meet girls.

URA Redneck if your parrot can say. 'Open up, it's the police!'

URA Redneck if your pocket knife often doubles as a toothpick

URA Redneck if your pocket knife's been referred to as "Exhibit A".

URA Redneck if your porch collapses and kills more than seven dogs.

URA Redneck if your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die.

URA Redneck if your porch collapses and you kill more than one dog.

URA Redneck if your porch collapses, and it kills more than seven dogs.

URA Redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.

URA Redneck if your rear tire are twice as wide as the front ones

URA Redneck if your richest relative's house needs the tires removed.

URA Redneck if your savings are just out of reach for that '76 Pinto.

URA Redneck if your school fight song was "Dueling Banjos".

URA Redneck if your Sis's nude dancing was the family reunion highlight.

URA Redneck if your sister subscribes to "Soldier of Fortune" magazine.

URA Redneck if your tattoo says "Mother" and it's misspelled

URA Redneck if your taxidermist is on 'speed-dial'.

URA Redneck if your truck cost more than your house.

URA Redneck if your truck has curtains, but your house doesn't.

URA Redneck if your two-year-old has more teeth than you do.

URA Redneck if your van has curtains and your house doesn't.

URA Redneck if your wading boots double as dress pants.

URA Redneck if your watch band is wider than any book you've read

URA Redneck if your wedding looks more like a family reunion.

URA Redneck if your wife beats you at arm wrestling

URA Redneck if your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

URA Redneck if your wife ever burned out an electric razor.

Ura Redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

Ura Redneck if your wife has four-wheel drive on her vacuum cleaner.

URA Redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.

URA Redneck if your wife owns a camouflage nightie.

URA Redneck if your wife would rather fish off a bridge then shop.

URA Redneck if your wife's best shoes have steel toes.

URA Redneck if your wife's brass knuckles set off the airport security.

URA Redneck if your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.

URA Redneck if your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.

URA Redneck if your will states all your posessions be sold at auction.

URA Redneck if your will states all your possessions be sold at auction.

URA Redneck if your yard has ever been the proposed site for a landfill.

Ura Redneck if, Your girlfriend just sold off her 'old' saddle.

URA Redneck if: Jack Daniels makes your list of most admired people.

URA Redneck if: You answer the door with a baseball bat in your hand

URA Redneck if: You burn your front yard instead of mow it.

URA Redneck if: you can guzzle Ever Clear!

URA Redneck if: You can have sex without spilling your beer.

URA Redneck if: you ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

URA Redneck if: You have more appliances in the yard than the house.

URA Redneck if: You list your parole officer as a reference

URA Redneck if: You were holding a beer in your wedding picture.

URA Redneck if: Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list

URA Redneck if: your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

What do you call 32 redneck women?   A full set of teeth.

What is Redneck foreplay? 'Get in the truck, bitch.'

What is Redneck foreplay? (Nudge) Are you awake?

What is redneck foreplay? A: Get in the truck, bitch!

What is Redneck foreplay? `Get in the truck, bitch.'

What was the dumb rednecks last words? "Y'all watch this"

Would an Egyptian Redneck be called Ali-Bubba?

You are Redneck when you ask, "Aunt Mama, is dinner ready?"

You know you're a Redneck if, you have a gunrack on your bicycle!

You know you're a Redneck if. You call your father 'Uncle Dad'.

You may be redneck if a watch band is wider than any book you've read.

You may be redneck if all of your four-letter words are two syllables.

You may be redneck if all your art was purchased at gas stations.

You may be redneck if antlers are nailed to the outside of your house.

You may be redneck if any of your hobbies require dogs and a lantern.

You may be redneck if anyone in your family rassles `gators for money.

You may be redneck if birds are attracted to your beard.

You may be redneck if blowing a tire results in a new flower pot.

You may be redneck if both your dad and you are in the same grade.

You may be redneck if both your dog and your wallet are on a chain.

You may be redneck if every socket in your house breaks a fire code.

You may be redneck if Goodwill declines your mattress.

You may be redneck if hitchhikers refuse to get in your car with you.

You may be redneck if Jack Daniels makes your most admired list.

You may be redneck if kudzu is in your family crest.

You may be redneck if less than half of the cars you own run.

You may be redneck if people ask permission to hunt in the front yard.

You may be redneck if potted meat on a saltine is an appetizer.

You may be redneck if Redman Tobacco sends you Christmas cards.

You may be redneck if someone in your family is an Elvis impersonator.

You may be redneck if Spam on a saltine is considered an appetizer.

You may be redneck if stealing road signs is a family outing.

You may be redneck if taillight covers on your car are made of tape.

You may be redneck if the color of your car is Bondo.

You may be redneck if the color of your car is primer.

You may be redneck if the color of your truck is Bondo.

You may be redneck if the color of your truck is primer.

You may be redneck if the Elvis Hotline limits you to 1 call per day.

You may be redneck if the family business requires a lookout.

You may be redneck if the front yard's pink flamingos ain't a joke.

You may be redneck if the Orkin man tells you, "Give up; you've lost."

You may be redneck if the primary color of your car is bondo.

You may be redneck if the QVC operator recognizes your voice.

You may be redneck if the Salvation Army declines your mattress.

You may be redneck if the UFO Hotline limits you to one call per day.

You may be redneck if there is a puddle in your driveway year-round.

You may be redneck if there is a stuffed possum anywhere in your home.

You may be redneck if there's a wasp nest in your living room.

You may be redneck if there's an Elvis portrait over the fireplace.

You may be redneck if there's an velvet Elvis portrait in your home.

You may be redneck if truckers tell your wife to watch her language.

You may be redneck if you answer the door holding a baseball bat.

You may be redneck if you are allowed to bring your dog to work.

You may be redneck if you are famous for your homemade squash wine.

You may be redneck if you are legally named "Bubba."

You may be redneck if you are proud that you can belch your full name.

You may be redneck if you barbecue Spam on the grill.

You may be redneck if you burn your yard instead of mowing it.

You may be redneck if you buy a new house & have to remove the wheels.

You may be redneck if you can burp the entire chorus of Jingle Bells.

You may be redneck if you can have sex without spilling your beer.

You may be redneck if you can swallow tobacco spit and not puke.

You may be redneck if you consider "Field And Stream" deep reading.

You may be redneck if you consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.

You may be redneck if you consider "TV Guide" to be deep reading.

You may be redneck if you cut your toenails in front of company.

You may be redneck if you don't like those "new-fangled" people.

You may be redneck if you don't need a clean shirt to go to work.

You may be redneck if you dress up the kids to go to K-Mart.

You may be redneck if you dress up the kids to go to Wal-Mart.

You may be redneck if you drink from Mason jars at home.

You may be redneck if you drive a tractor to the grocery store.

You may be redneck if you drive a tractor to the liquor store.

You may be redneck if you drove to elementary school.

You may be redneck if you eat a McDonald's cheeseburger in one bite.

You may be redneck if you entertain with tapes of pro bowling.

You may be redneck if you entertain yourself with a fly swatter.

You may be redneck if you ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

You may be redneck if you feel cow tipping should be an Olympic event.

You may be redneck if you get into a custody fight over a hunting dog.

You may be redneck if you get Odor-Eaters as a Christmas present.

You may be redneck if you get your oil changed by your barber.

You may be redneck if you go to family reunions to meet women.

You may be redneck if you go to family reunions to pick up girls.

You may be redneck if you had to remove a Marlboro to kiss the bride.

You may be redneck if you had to take the wheels off your new home.

You may be redneck if you have "dress" boots.

You may be redneck if you have a bumper sticker on your bowling ball.

You may be redneck if you have a civil war chess set & play checkers.

You may be redneck if you have a gunrack on your bicycle.

You may be redneck if you have a ham hanging from your front porch.

You may be redneck if you have a Hefty Bag replacing any car window.

You may be redneck if you have a rag as a gas-cap.

You may be redneck if you have a suit with sequins on it.

You may be redneck if you have a tire swing in you house.

You may be redneck if you have a velvet bedspread.

You may be redneck if you have an 8-track player in your 4X4.

You may be redneck if you have any relatives named Elmer or Jed.

You may be redneck if you have brothers named "Bubba" or "Junior."

You may be redneck if you have ever financed a tattoo.

You may be redneck if you have every episode of "Hee-Haw" on tape.

You may be redneck if you have fly strips above the kitchen table.

You may be redneck if you have more than twelve dogs on your porch.

You may be redneck if you have more than twelve dogs under your porch.

You may be redneck if you have the taxidermist's number on speed-dial.

You may be redneck if you have to mow your driveway.

You may be redneck if you have to rake leaves in your kitchen.

You may be redneck if you have velvet Elvis paintings...in plain view.

You may be redneck if you have velvet paintings above your mantle.

You may be redneck if you invite friends over to see your lava lamp.

You may be redneck if you keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

You may be redneck if you keep a pellet gun by the front door.

You may be redneck if you keep catfish in your aquarium.

You may be redneck if you know how many bales of hay fit in your car.

You may be redneck if you know how to hotwire a bulldozer.

You may be redneck if you know how to hotwire a tractor.

You may be redneck if you know how to milk a goat.

You may be redneck if you legally name your child "Bubba."

You may be redneck if you list your parole officer as a reference.

You may be redneck if you live with more dogs than family.

You may be redneck if you made a hot tub using a trolling motor.

You may be redneck if you mother has ever been arrested for poaching.

You may be redneck if you mow your yard and discover a car.

You may be redneck if you often answer the door holding baseball bat.

You may be redneck if you often shop for groceries at gas stations.

You may be redneck if you own 3 TV's and only 2 books.

You may be redneck if you own a belt buckle weighing more than 3 lbs.

You may be redneck if you own a collection of "monster truck" tapes.

You may be redneck if you own a collection of pro-bowling tapes.

You may be redneck if you own a collection of pro-wrestling tapes.

You may be redneck if you own a fur coat that's homemade.

You may be redneck if you own a pair of "dress" boots.

You may be redneck if you own more cowboy boots than sneakers.

You may be redneck if you own more television sets than books.

You may be redneck if you own more than 3 shirts with cut-off sleeves.

You may be redneck if you own more than two tractors.

You may be redneck if you paint your car with cans of spray paint.

You may be redneck if you paint your car with house paint.

You may be redneck if you prefer car keys to Q-tips.

You may be redneck if you proudly display gifts you got at Graceland.

You may be redneck if you proudly own a "monster truck."

You may be redneck if you proudly own a denim leisure suit.

You may be redneck if you quit your job to avoid paying child support.

You may be redneck if you read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.

You may be redneck if you refer to certain animals as "good eatin'!"

You may be redneck if you refer to Mason jars as "the good glasses."

You may be redneck if you refer to paper plates as "the good china."

You may be redneck if you refer to the 5th grade as "my senior year."

You may be redneck if you refer to TV dinners as "gourmet dining."

You may be redneck if you refer to your truck as "The Love Machine."

You may be redneck if you refinance your taxidermy bills.

You may be redneck if you regularly exclaim "Them's good eatin!"

You may be redneck if you roll down the car window after sex.

You may be redneck if you sell rabbits out of your car.

You may be redneck if you share your beer with your dog.

You may be redneck if you show your belt buckle when asked for I.D.

You may be redneck if you skipped school in the 6th grade to vote.

You may be redneck if you still owe money on your 8-track tape player.

You may be redneck if you still think pro-wrestling is real.

You may be redneck if you take a bath only once a week.

You may be redneck if you take the kids to watch rabbits breed.

You may be redneck if you tape pro-wrestling so you can watch later.

You may be redneck if you tape pro-wrestling while you're at work.

You may be redneck if you think a hand saw is a musical instrument.

You may be redneck if you think campho-phenique is a miracle drug.

You may be redneck if you think Deliverance was a comedy.

You may be redneck if you think Deliverance was a love story.

You may be redneck if you think Ernest P. Worrel is funny.

You may be redneck if you think God looks like Hank Williams, Jr.

You may be redneck if you think paprika is a third-world country.

You may be redneck if you think Slim Fast is Reba McEntire's drummer.

You may be redneck if you tried to take a fishing pole into Sea World.

You may be redneck if you use a bed sheet as a sofa cover.

You may be redneck if you use a farm tractor to mow your yard.

You may be redneck if you use aluminum foil in place of curtains.

You may be redneck if you use an oily rag for a gas-cap.

You may be redneck if you use your mailbox to hold up the clothesline.

You may be redneck if you voted Tammy Bakker as "Best Dressed Woman."

You may be redneck if you want the national anthem to be "Free Bird."

You may be redneck if you wash your truck more often than your kids.

You may be redneck if you wear a belt buckle weighing more than 3 lbs.

You may be redneck if you wear clothes to church with sequins on them.

You may be redneck if you were holding a beer in your wedding picture.

You may be redneck if you were playing pool when your child was born.

You may be redneck if you wore a sequined dress to any wedding.

You may be redneck if you wore a sequined dress to your own wedding.

You may be redneck if you wore a sequined tuxedo to any wedding.

You may be redneck if you wore a sequined tuxedo to your own wedding.

You may be redneck if you're affectionately known as "Bubba, Jr."

You may be redneck if you're arrested for peeing in an ice machine.

You may be redneck if you're excited by gals who can field dress deer.

You may be redneck if you're still upset that "Gunsmoke" was canceled.

You may be redneck if you're still upset that "Hee Haw" was canceled.

You may be redneck if you've been a snipe hunter more than once.

You may be redneck if you've been accused of lying through your tooth.

You may be redneck if you've been arrested for an obscene mud-flap.

You may be redneck if you've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.

You may be redneck if you've ever BBQ'd Spam on the grill.

You may be redneck if you've ever BBQ'ed chitlins on the grill.

You may be redneck if you've ever been banished from a bowling alley.

You may be redneck if you've ever bought a used baseball cap.

You may be redneck if you've ever Christmas shopped at a truck stop.

You may be redneck if you've ever cleaned fish in your living room.

You may be redneck if you've ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.

You may be redneck if you've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.

You may be redneck if you've ever filled a deer tag on a golf course.

You may be redneck if you've ever financed a tattoo.

You may be redneck if you've ever given rat traps as gifts.

You may be redneck if you've ever heckled someone during a eulogy.

You may be redneck if you've ever hotwired a bulldozer.

You may be redneck if you've ever left Santa Claus an RC & a moon pie.

You may be redneck if you've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.

You may be redneck if you've ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

You may be redneck if you've ever made change in the offering plate.

You may be redneck if you've ever rolled your riding lawn mower.

You may be redneck if you've ever shot a deer from inside your house.

You may be redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from rest areas.

You may be redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from Stuckey's.

You may be redneck if you've ever used a weed eater indoors.

You may be redneck if you've ever used lard in bed.

You may be redneck if you've ever vacationed in a rest area.

You may be redneck if you've ever worn a cowboy hat to church.

You may be redneck if you've ever worn shorts to a funeral home.

You may be redneck if you've hit a deer with your car....deliberately.

You may be redneck if you've named one of you kids after a good dog.

You may be redneck if you've taken toilet paper home from work.

You may be redneck if you've vacationed in a rest area parking lot.

You may be redneck if your 9x9 living room has a Spanish decor.

You may be redneck if your all-time favorite movie is "Deliverance."

You may be redneck if your all-time favorite movie is Cannonball Run.

You may be redneck if your best shoes have steel toes.

You may be redneck if your best suit includes a Budweiser cap.

You may be redneck if your best suit includes an orange hunting vest.

You may be redneck if your best suit includes hip waders.

You may be redneck if your best suit is a Coors cap & an orange vest.

You may be redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 5 years.

You may be redneck if your brake lights are covered with red tape.

You may be redneck if your brother-in-law is also your uncle.

You may be redneck if your car window is actually a Hefty bag.

You may be redneck if your children address you as "Uncle Dad."

You may be redneck if your Christmas tree has a deer stand in it.

You may be redneck if your coffee table used to be a TV cable spool.

You may be redneck if your daughters' children also call you Cousin.

You may be redneck if your dog and your wallet are both on a chain.

You may be redneck if your dog can smoke a cigarette.

You may be redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

You may be redneck if your dog sleeps closer to you than your wife.

You may be redneck if your dress shoes have steel toes.

You may be redneck if your driveway is bordered by half-buried tires.

You may be redneck if your entertainment is a 6-pack and a bug zapper.

You may be redneck if your entertainment is shooting rats at the dump.

You may be redneck if your family tree doesn't fork.

You may be redneck if your father is also your uncle.

You may be redneck if your father legally named you "Bubba."

You may be redneck if your father made your personalized license plate.

You may be redneck if your father refers to you as "Bubba, Jr."

You may be redneck if your favorite Chinese meal comes from La Choy.

You may be redneck if your fiance carries a spit cup.

You may be redneck if your first cousin is also your wife.

You may be redneck if your first name is followed by "Bob".

You may be redneck if your flashlight holds more then four batteries.

You may be redneck if your funeral has more pickup trucks than cars.

You may be redneck if your gene pool is a foot deep and usually empty.

You may be redneck if your home comes with whitewall tires.

You may be redneck if your home is mobile but your car isn't.

You may be redneck if your home library is a entire set of TV Guides.

You may be redneck if your home needs a bumper hitch.

You may be redneck if your house warming involves removing the tires.

You may be redneck if your idea of a "gourmet chef" is Chef Boyardee.

You may be redneck if your idea of a "gourmet meal" comes from a can.

You may be redneck if your idea of a "gourmet meal" is Alpo.

You may be redneck if your idea of a "gourmet meal" is chitlins.

You may be redneck if your idea of a "gourmet meal" is grits & greens.

You may be redneck if your idea of classic literature is TV Guide.

You may be redneck if your idea of health food is chitlins.

You may be redneck if your idea of health food is lard.

You may be redneck if your idea of health food is pork rinds.

You may be redneck if your jeans have Skoal can prints on the pockets.

You may be redneck if your job requires you to wear an orange vest.

You may be redneck if your kid takes a siphon hose to Show-and-Tell.

You may be redneck if your kid takes your spit cup to Show-and-Tell.

You may be redneck if your kids are described as "dumb as a brick."

You may be redneck if your Levi's have Skoal can marks on the pockets.

You may be redneck if your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You may be redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

You may be redneck if your mailbox is in the shape of any farm animal.

You may be redneck if your mailbox is made from an old farm plow.

You may be redneck if your mailbox is made out of old tractor parts.

You may be redneck if your mailbox is made out of old truck parts.

You may be redneck if your matchbook doubles as a toothpick.

You may be redneck if your mom earns beer money mud-wrestling.

You may be redneck if your mom earns beer money rebuilding engines.

You may be redneck if your mother has ever been arrested for poaching.

You may be redneck if your mother refers to you as "Bubba, Jr."

You may be redneck if your mother turns out to be your sister.

You may be redneck if your mother uses a spittoon.

You may be redneck if your nephew's wife calls you Cousin too.

You may be redneck if your parents are first cousins.

You may be redneck if your parents legally named you "Bubba."

You may be redneck if your pocket knife often doubles as a toothpick.

You may be redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.

You may be redneck if your school's fight song was "Dueling Banjos."

You may be redneck if your taxidermist bill exceeds annual income.

You may be redneck if your truck costs more than your house.

You may be redneck if your truck is taller than your house.

You may be redneck if your truck muffler is held on by a coat hanger.

You may be redneck if your two-year-old has more teeth than you do.

You may be redneck if your van has curtains and your house doesn't.

You may be redneck if your wading boots double as dress pants.

You may be redneck if your wedding looks more like a family reunion.

You may be redneck if your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

You may be redneck if your wife carries a spit cup.

You may be redneck if your wife doesn't put on shoes to go shopping.

You may be redneck if your wife ever burned out an electric razor.

You may be redneck if your wife goes to weddings wearing a tube-top.

You may be redneck if your wife has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

You may be redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it cute.

You may be redneck if your wife has a spit cup by her ironing board.

You may be redneck if your wife has ever worn a tube top to a funeral.

You may be redneck if your wife has ever worn a tube top to a wedding.

You may be redneck if your wife owns a camouflage nightie.

You may be redneck if your wife really admires your mother's tattoos.

You may be redneck if your wife wears any camouflage lingerie.

You may be redneck if your wife would rather fish than shop.

You may be redneck if your wife's best shoes have steel toes.

You may be redneck if your wife's hairdo is higher than the doorframe.

You may be redneck if your wife's hairdo is ruined by the ceiling fan.

You may be redneck if your wife's job has her wear an orange vest.

You might be a redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of admired people

You're a Redneck if "Somebody jiggle that" is a common household phrase.

You're a Redneck if all of your four-letter words are two syllables.

You're a Redneck if family reunions are good places to pick up women.

You're a Redneck if hitchhikers won't get in the car with you.

You're a Redneck if less than half the cars you own run.

You're a redneck if Red Man Chewing Tobacco sends you a Christmas card.

You're a Redneck if the family business requires a lookout.

You're a redneck if the Salvation Army rejects your mattress.

You're a Redneck if the taillight covers on your car are made of tape.

You're a Redneck if truckers tell your wife to watch her language.

You're a Redneck if you come back from the dump with more than you took.

You're a Redneck if you cut your toenails in front of company.

You're a Redneck if you don't need a clean shirt to go to work.

You're a redneck if you entertain with tapes of championship bowling.

You're a redneck if you entertain yourself with a fly swatter.

You're a Redneck if you find three cars while mowing the lawn.

You're a redneck if you had to remove the Marlboro to kiss the bride.

You're a Redneck if you have a gun rack on your bicycle.

You're a Redneck if you have a Hefty Bag instead of a passenger window.

You're a Redneck if you have a rag for a gas cap.

You're a redneck if you have a tire swing in your house.

You're a Redneck if you have any relatives named Elmer or Jed.

You're a Redneck if you have brothers named Bubba or Junior.

You're a Redneck if you have ever financed a tattoo.

You're a redneck if you have jars filled with stuff the FBI can't ID.

You're a Redneck if you have to move the transmission to take a bath.

You're a redneck if you hold a frog and it worries about getting warts.

You're a Redneck if you mother has ever been arrested for poaching.

You're a Redneck if you own a homemade fur coat.

You're a Redneck if you own more than three shirts with cutoff sleeves.

You're a redneck if you prefer car keys to Q-Tips.

You're a redneck if you record WWF Wrestling while you're at work.

You're a Redneck if you roll down the car window after sex.

You're a redneck if you skipped school in the 8th grade to vote.

You're a Redneck if you think God looks like Hank Williams, Jr.

You're a Redneck if you think people who have electricity are uppity.

You're a Redneck if you're holding a beer in your wedding photo.

You're a Redneck if you're holding a beer in your wedding picture.

You're a Redneck if you've been too drunk to fish.

You're a Redneck if you've ever BBQ'd Spam on the grill.

You're a redneck if you've ever been arrested for obscene mud flaps.

You're a Redneck if you've ever cleaned fish in your living room.

You're a Redneck if you've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.

You're a redneck if you've ever given rat traps as a gift.

You're a Redneck if you've ever lost your wife in a poker game.

You're a redneck if you've ever named a child for a good dog.

You're a redneck if you've ever worn a cowboy hat to church.

You're a Redneck if you've lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

You're a redneck if your belt buckle is heavier than 4 lbs.

You're a Redneck if your brother-in-law is also your uncle.

You're a Redneck if your dog and your wallet are both on a chain.

You're a Redneck if your dog sleeps closer to you than your wife does.

You're a Redneck if your entertained by a 6-pack and a bug-zapper.

You're a redneck if your funeral has more pickup trucks than cars.

You're a Redneck if your home needs a hitch.

You're a Redneck if your kids are described as "dumb as a brick".

You're a Redneck if your Levis have Skoal can prints on the pockets.

You're a Redneck if your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You're a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

You're a Redneck if your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

You're a Redneck if your next family reunion is a chance to meet girls.

You're a Redneck if your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die.

You're a Redneck if your savings are out of reach for a '76 Pinto.

You're a redneck if your truck costs more than your house.

You're a Redneck if your two-year-old has more teeth than you do.

You're a redneck if your vacuum cleaner has four wheel drive.

You're a redneck if your van has curtains and your house doesn't.

You're a redneck if your wife's vacuum cleaner has four-wheel drive!

You're a Redneck if: Less than half the cars in your yard, work.

You're a Redneck if: Your beltbuckle is heavier than 4 lbs.

You're a Redneck if: Your entertained by a 6-pack and a bug-zapper.

You're a Redneck if: Your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die.