MY JOURNAL ENTRIES

 

                            

Jan 12 1:58pm

Not sure what I have to say of interest today, I'm still feeling pretty wiped out. I went to Greg's after I got off work on Saturday night. He was almost ready for bed and I was exhausted so we crashed pretty much within the half hour. On Sunday we were lucky that Shandra worked at nine am so she was outta the way pretty much right off. I was foggy headed and I know I was incredibly boring and at times was bordering on incoherent.

We had plans to go to his artist friend's house, so I was dreading that as much as I was looking forward to it. Wasn't sure that I was up to having to make any effort to be witty or engaging or attentive. I found that we would sit for long periods and not say anything, or that he'd be kinda snappy with me so I finally went and sat in the bathroom and found that I started to cry. I had just gone to brush my teeth and splash some cold water on my face. Now this was nothing deep, I just get really emotional when I'm tired or sick. I sat in there and cried for at least fifteen minutes. Finally Greg knocked on the door and asked what in the world was I doing. I lied, and said I was cleaning the bathroom. Which means that I had to pull out the comet, quickly sprinkle some in the tub and smear it around before I opened the door. Pretty stupid, huh?

When he asked I said that I'd gotten a bit of Comet in my eye and that they were watering, he seemed concerned enough I guess. After he left I cleaned quickly and then went back out to living room. He had started making me a cassette which was kinda sweet. I'd been saying earlier that I no longer had any of my old B-52's CD's or cassettes. He was taping WHAMMY! for me and then making a compilation tape as well. It reminded me of what my mother once told me, "never listen to a man's words, instead watch their actions". Not sure if you know what I meant by that, not sure I'm entirely certain what I meant either.

We had this really awkward conversation about how people "get over stuff" that happens to them as children etc. I was not making my point well due to not feeling well, and not maintaining a clear train of thought. I'll have to pick this up some other day with him. Consider it very bad timing.

Eventually we phone the cab and head over to their house, and lucky us..... they had a couple that had just "dropped in" with their three children already there. Not that I minded but I just hate that whole "so what do u do? Are you an artist as well? Oh really, and how do you know M******* and G**** then?". Greg and G**** were talking about work related technical stuff and M******* was preparing food and stuff, so I was sitting with this couple and I really didn't wanna meet them beyond just pleasantries. But whenever someone meets me I find they are quite fascinated by my job and have a ton of questions, and I spend a ton of time explaining and educating them because so many people have such twisted perceptions of my field.

These people had stopped by after meeting at a dinner party a few nights prior, and had told M******* that they were interested in buying a painting but showed no real interest in going out to the studio or looking at her portfolio. I think they were more interested in adding her to their list of "interesting friends." He's a lawyer and she's a geologist btw. I really didn't enjoy myself. I was too tired, cranky, and lightheaded to make a day of this. Which we did BTW. At ten PM we finally head home with a two thousand dollar painting in tow. The next hour was spent hanging, rehanging, and rearranging all the rest of the art in the apartment. We just started watching TV and Shandra drags in her English homework that she never did that is due tomorrow. The three of us actually had a few laughs over the scenarios posed in her lessons, very rare indeed. But I tired of it and went to return some much needed phone calls that I had piling up. Eventually Shandra tells me that she can't sleep cause she drank coffee earlier....   GO TO BED!!!! So she hangs out, and by this point I had a worse headache and just felt "icky" all over. I fell asleep and just barely woke up when Greg was putting me to bed.

... thrilling day, huh?

I actually really like the painting that Greg bought, initially I wasn't so certain about it. But the longer it stared at me the more attached I became to it. He really did get a good deal on it though, it was an older piece and she gave it to him for one thousand dollars off.

Since I got home this morning all I've done is a bit of cleaning, tons of websurfing, etc and even met a friend and her girlfriend online for chat. I can't believe how exhausted I am still, I have work piling up and I just can't bring myself to do any of it. I'm such a SLAG.

I'm listening to "song for a future generation" by the B52's... I love this band, always have. Next to Nina Hagen, they probably had the most influence over me as a teenager. I swear to god officer it was the B52's that insisted I kill the Phys Ed teacher... honest. I did collect wav files of them this morning off the NET... WHY? Oh please, ask me something I know. If that made any sense to you.... then you're in worse shape than I'll ever be :)

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