Your patronage is important. If you cannot adopt an average middle-aged white guy right now, please dig deep and give what you can. Look into your heart, you know you'll be doing the right thing. Most of our guys are under-priviledged to an extreme, and whatever you are able to give could make a big difference in one of their lives.

Consider an adoption. Fully 30-100% (depending on whether you adopt a founder or a foundling) of the funds you contribute go to improving the life of an average guy. You will get emails and JPG attachments from your adopted guy so you can follow his progress.

For as little as $500 a day, your adopted guy can:

• Make his sports car payment
  
• Afford occasional greens fees at an exclusive golf course
  
• Smoke fine cigars
  
• Keep the houseboat maintained
  
• In some cases, send the kids to private school
  
• Keep the liquor cabinet stocked with the good stuff

The statistics for the life of an average
middle-aged white guy are abysmal:

Over 75% will go to bed not having received satisfactory oral personal gratification that day (if you know what I mean).

Another 80% will not have eaten lobster, caviar, OR sushi!

Fully 90% will have to wake up by an alarm four or five days a week!

YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

Simply send what you can by paypal, or make a commitment to
The Grand Kahuna
and founder of the AMAWGA

DIG DEEP!
I promise to do something with 100% of the money you send.

Help Us Find Our Poster Boy

Unfortunately, we had disqualify OJ. He's just not average enough.	Paul Reubens is making a comeback. He's probably too busy.

Page by Redheaddad
"Because some things will always amuse me."

Music by Hanson
(future AMAWGs)

DISCLAIMER:
This page is not meant to mimic, portray, parodize or otherwise victimize any person, cartoon character, group or NPO. As if they couldn't take a lesson from our example; and like any sizable percentage of donations made it to where the donors had hoped it would go. Any gesture towards legal harassment will be met pro se by this overeducated certified paralegal with the full vigor of every conceivable counterclaim and certainly the full attention of the media. So if you are some humorless "pc" pansy having palpitations over this page, just shut up and learn your role.

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