A Nice Bedside Manner

By Mary Elliott

“I know you didn’t mean for me to fall when you gave me that little shove. Don’t worry, I’m fine.”

“No, I’ve got to check you over; I have my Hippocratic oath to uphold. You could have done more damage to your ribs when you hit the floor. Plus there could be some other injuries, you did land down there pretty hard.”

Lee made a face, but when the fingers began a gentle exploration of his body, he relaxed. His messed up ribs were the reason he was here in the first place. This kind of treatment, though, he didn’t mind at all. Relaxing, he thought back to how he’d ended up in the Royal Hawaiian Hotel instead of his bunk on Seaview….

* * * * *

Not another trip to Sick Bay! Now I’m going to have to put up with Jamie.

“I’m fine. You should be tending to the crew.”

“So all that blood on you is from somebody else? And is that why you’re holding your left side?”

“If I tell you no, will you stop poking me?”

“Not a chance, Skipper.”

Lee heaved a huge sigh. “Do your worst, Dr. Frankenstein.”

“You should be so lucky. Sir.”

“You really need to work on your bedside manner, Doctor. Ouch!”

“Ooops, sorry. Must be that bad bedside manner you’re talking about.”

Grinning through the pain, Lee conceded the point to Dr. Jamieson, and accepted the attention, grunting just a little. Was it only five days ago Seaview had left Santa Barbara for Pearl Harbor to do a shakedown cruise for some new Navy equipment? Because of Seaview’s speed and crash depth limits the Navy requested its use. Everyone aboard was quite happy at the thought of a layover at Pearl to remove the equipment once the test run was completed. Even allowing for rotation, everyone was getting a 48 hour shore leave. Oh yes, a bunch of happy crewman until HE came on board, the reincarnation of Captain Bligh AKA Admiral Starke.

From the moment the boat shoved off, nothing was done correctly according to that man. The supply of unbroken pencils was running low and after two days Lee had consumed his private stash of Tylenol. Gritting his teeth he appeared in Sick Bay much to Jamie’s surprise. The doctor refilled the bottle suggesting a nice workout in the exercise room might work off some of the stress. He also offered to instruct Cookie to provide his special hot cocoa at night.

“No, thanks Jamie, with my luck Starke will smell the secret ingredient on my breath. That’s all I would need. But I will take you up on the other idea. Thirty minutes on the heavy bag might relieve the tension. It couldn’t hurt.”

Famous last words. He still wasn’t sure what went wrong. Who was he kidding, the way he was hitting the bag, he should have used heavy padded gloves. An hour later he was back in Sick Bay, this time accompanied by Kowalski who wanted to make sure the skipper actually got to where he’d promised. The diagnosis was a badly sprained left wrist and bruised knuckles. With orders to ice it for the next couple of hours and the use of an elastic wrap, Lee left for his cabin, muttering under his breath. The only lucky thing was it was his left not his right wrist, so he could work on the stack of reports piled high on his desk. It was also a good excuse to stay out of Captain Bligh’s way, so maybe the minor injury was a blessing in disguise.

* * * * *

A couple hours later there was a knock on the door.

“Enter.”

Chip walked in carrying a tray loaded down with food. “Jamie and the admiral are keeping Admiral Starke company for tonight. I thought you might enjoy a quiet dinner with just me. It might be easier on your digestion.”

“Thanks Chip, but I’m not hungry.”

“Don’t give me that. You’ve barely eaten anything this cruise, so dig in. I’ll even be nice and cut up your steak, medium rare just like you like it. If you’re a good boy, there’s key lime pie for dessert.”

Lee had to admit the Boston strip steak, baked potato and asparagus with cheese sauce looked appetizing. And he had skipped lunch. He’s speared the first piece of meat; it was well seasoned and cooked to perfection. Before he knew it, his pie plate was being scraped and Chip was refilling the coffee cups.

“Thank you; guess I was hungry after all. I hate to ask, but how are things? Haven’t heard any bellowing since I’ve been in my cabin.”

“I don’t get that man, the minute you’re out of range he becomes human, well almost human. I believe he just wants to see how far he can push you. Don’t tell anyone, but Nelson had a bit of spat with him. Said to knock it off, the boat was in great shape. I don’t think Admiral Nelson likes it when you get so stressed out.”

As he rose from his chair, the XO suggested he should do the nightly walkabout.

“Lee, I know you haven’t been sleeping much so I’ll take tonight’s tour of the boat, you get some rest.”

Lee shook his head vehemently. “No, tomorrow we’re testing at near crash depth. I won’t sleep unless I personally inspect everything. No offense.”

“Why do I even waste my breath? At least do it now so you can get to bed at a reasonable hour. You need to be in top shape to deal with Admiral Starke all day tomorrow.”

“And that’s why you’re my executive officer, Mr. Morton; you make excellent suggestions.”

They parted ways at the door, Chip to his cabin, Lee to the circuitry room. He spent more time than usual at each department wanting to ensure trouble-free testing conditions. He made several suggestions, spotting minute problems such as dust on the top of a storage locker. In each place crewman jumped to correct every small oversight, all knowing any failure on their part would reflect on their captain. To a man no one wanted to give Admiral Starke any more ammunition.

Down in Engineering Petty Officer Burke had been assigned to keep an eye on the new equipment, especially the pressure gauge.

“Everything all right here, Burke?”

The enlisted man pointed at the instrument bank. “Skipper, the gauge has remained in the safety zone but it rose a couple times without any reason as far as I could tell. It might be a faulty instrument. Suggest we replace it. By doing it now, we still have over 12 hours before the test drive to check out a replacement part.”

“How long will it take you?”

“At most, 20 minutes, but I’d feel safer with less water on top of us, just in case.”

“And we can track any buildup as we resume current depth. I’ll order us up to periscope depth and stay here while you get the replacement.”

Lee picked up the mic and gave the orders, also ordering Simpson to report and give Burke assistance in case of trouble. With only one good hand, if an emergency arose Lee knew he would be at a disadvantage. True to Burke’s promise, the new gauge was installed without a hitch while three sets of eyes double and triple checked everything. It was an easy job but all three men were experienced enough to know how something very simple could lead to a disaster during the testing of an experimental device. Lee stayed as the boat slowly descended, keeping an eye on everything. At 500 feet he left, promising to return in an hour. They would hold at1000 feet until morning.

“The slightest problem, call me.”

“Yes, sir, I’ll compare figures from yesterday’s dive and check the new readings.”

The captain completed his inspection but his mind was back on the device. When he returned the sub had been at the ordered depth over 30 minutes with no signs of trouble.

“Simpson, I wanted you to keep an eye on the gauge while Burke and I inspect the Navy’s brightest new idea. I know the computer will sound an alarm if pressure reaches the danger area but I want to know if there are any changes.”

The two men grabbed the manual and spent 90 minutes going over every bolt and connection and found nothing amiss. Finally satisfied, Lee left instructions with the relief crewman Kirk to call if even as little as a two percent increase occurred, even if it was temporary. His last stop was the control room to bring O’Brien up to date and to request relief for Kirk in two hours. The two crewmen could alternate staring at the dial. Maybe he was being a worry wart, but past events had taught him to err on the side of caution. Too wound up to sleep, Lee stopped by the wardroom for the mug of cocoa and as luck would have it, the last piece of pie.

“If you’re hungry, I can make you a sandwich, Skipper.”

“No, thank you, this is fine. How did Mr. Morton miss this last slice?”

The steward grinned, knowing how the CO and XO teased each other over their food.

“Cookie saved two pieces, one with your name on it and one with Mr. Morton’s. He left about a half an hour ago still eyeing your pie. I gave him some cookies to make him happy.”

“I’ll see that you are put in for hazardous duty pay. Standing between the XO and pie could be dangerous to your health, Dobson.”

“Don’t tell him but Cookie’s making peanut butter pie for tomorrow’s dinner. I’m just glad I have early duty.”

Lee felt the tension leave his body as they shared a laugh over Chip’s sweet tooth. As he undressed and crawled under the covers he check the time; 3 AM, so much for an early evening.

* * * * *

By 0700 Lee was in the control room having stopped by to examine the new equipment again. Mr. Maxwell would be in charge of the testing along with Riley. It was scheduled to start at 0900. This gave him time to check on all the stations in the control room before the admirals showed up. He was on his third cup of coffee by the time Nelson and Starke entered. They were followed closely by Chip who had just come from checking with Maxwell per the captain’s orders.

“We’re ready to start the dive when you’re ready, Admiral Starke. We’re at 1000 feet and all systems are green.”

“Very well, Captain. Dive the boat, make her depth 4500 feet. The test calls for halting the descent every 500 feet for 15 minutes.”

“Aye, aye, sir. Mr. Morton, prepare to dive.”

The first 2000 feet, everything ran as expected. Just before the depth gauge registered 3000 feet, Mr. Maxwell reported to the control room.

“Captain, the pressure has jumped suddenly, but we’re still in the safety zone.”

They stopped at the 3000 mark and waited. Would the needle continue to rise?

Just before Seaview was scheduled to descend to the next level, Maxwell called again.

“Sir, pressure has dropped and is holding steady.”

Lee picked up the mic while the two admirals shared a look of relief between themselves. “All right, we will continue. Sing out if there’s any sign of trouble. Mr. Morton, let’s slow the dive this time to be safe. Continue the dive.”

“Aye, aye, sir.”

At the 3300 mark Mr. Maxwell was on the intercom again.

“Captain, pressure has really jumped this time and is not stopping. It’ll be in the red zone in ---”

Whenever he was going to say was lost as Seaview suddenly pitched to one side, sending men flying and just as quickly tossing them to the other side of the control room. Lee tried to grab hold of the charting table but with only one good hand wasn’t agile enough. His head hit the sonar station, dazing him. As blood trickled down his face he vainly tried to hold onto something but as the boat lurched again he solidly connected with the corner of the table on the return trip. Gasping for breath and knowing he’d bruised if not broken some ribs, Lee ordered the sub to surface. Just as the boat started to roll again he felt an arm reach around his back and a hand clutched tightly on the table. He looked down and saw the other hand holding tight to the edge, effectively anchoring him in place.

Four stripes on the sleeves, Nelson to the rescue, Lee thought in his disorientated condition.

Seaview bucked again, this time a little less violently. A voice only he could hear whispered a suggestion.

“Disconnect the equipment.”

Lee shook his head trying to clear it but still noting the Seaview’s continued ascent.

“No, we’re going up without difficulty and are settling down. Too dangerous until we break surface.”

A grunt, in agreement or not, Lee couldn’t tell, but he was the captain. It was his decision. By the time they hit the 300 feet mark the boat had stabilized. The arm that had secured him was removed and the man stepped away. Still dazed he reached for the mic, snaring it on his second attempt and ordered a damage control report. Upon hearing all areas watertight and no major injuries to the crew, Lee’s knees finally started to buckle only to be grabbed once more by the admiral and led to the periscope steps to sit down.

“Mr. Morton, check to see if the sea is calm. If so, then get Chief Sharkey and some men together to help tear out that cursed piece of junk.”

Chip raised the periscope and saw nothing but quiet seas and sent Sharkey to assist Riley and Maxwell. Correctly interpreting Lee’s command he ordered the malfunctioning equipment carefully packed so not to further damage it. They would need to know what had gone wrong. Stooping down behind Lee he placed an arm on his friend’s shoulder.

“Time to get you to Sick Bay, Skipper.”

“No, I’m all right here. Make sure the crew is tended to first. I want a report as soon as possible. Are you injured?”

“Don’t I look all in one piece?”

“Yeah, I guess you do, and so does your twin.” Turning to the man still standing on the other side of him he started to offer his thanks.

“Admiral Starke?”

“Who did you expect, Captain Bligh?” the older man responded gruffly. “My compliments, Captain Crane. Now stop being a stubborn ass and get yourself tended to. You’re not irreplaceable, you know, despite what Harry says.”

“Starke being nice to me? I must be hurt worse than I think,” Lee mumbled as he was led out of the control room.

Starke’s brow furrowed. “Did he say something just then, Harry?”

“I didn’t hear a thing, Jiggs.”

* * * * *

Lee tried to find a comfortable position on the bunk. He had reasonably argued for his reprieve from Sick Bay pointing out how busy they were and that he would successfully escape anyway. With the promise to do nothing but relax in his cabin, Jamie reluctantly released him. Luckily he had only a mild concussion and no broken ribs. Lee knew someone would stop by every couple hours to check on him but it was better than being cooped up in Sick Bay.

He still was in shock by Starke’s earlier words and action. Maybe he had misjudged him, only time would tell. The important thing was no serious injuries amongst the crew and Seaview was undamaged. The geniuses could figure out what had gone wrong, it was no longer his worry. They should reach Pearl Harbor in approximately 30 hours.

The admiral visited later that night to see how Lee was doing. They discussed plans for the maintenance that was due on Seaview, to be followed by a short shakedown cruise before loading the cargo for a two-week supply run to Sea Lab Six. The crew would still have their liberty while the equipment was loaded aboard and the maintenance work done.

Before Nelson was able to leave, Jamie showed up.

“I’m glad you’re here, Harry. I need you to back me up. Captain, besides the concussion, damage ribs, and sprained wrist you are exhausted. Effective immediately I’m declaring you unfit for duty for the next two weeks. Chip doesn’t need you hanging around, getting in the way while he supervises the maintenance schedule and the supply transfer. Once we reach Pearl, I don’t want to see you near the boat. You are on vacation. Do I make myself clear?”

Lee grimaced. “Come on Jamie, I just need a couple days and I’ll be fine.”

Nelson waved a dismissive hand. “Sorry Lee, I totally agree with Will. It will be close to two weeks before we make the supply run anyway so I’m sure if you behave yourself, Will may knock a day or two off your sentence. Come on, how bad can a vacation in Hawaii be?”

Lee knew when he was out gunned. Besides, he had to admit he was feeling pretty banged up. Maybe a week or so laying on the beach would recharge his batteries. It was just too bad he couldn’t get any diving in. He suddenly smiled, remembering something else he could do to pass the time while at Pearl. Vacation time was looking up.

* * ** *

Three days later at the Royal Hawaiian Hotel, Lee laid on his bed trying not to sound too upset. He wanted to go on enjoying his vacation.

After ensuring there was no further injury to the rib cage, the delicate fingers expertly palpitated his abdomen, checking for signs of internal injury. Then the hands moved further down the body.

“Oh, there seems to be some swelling occurring.  I’m not hurting you, am I?”

“Uhhhhh…oh no, positively not hurting me. Oh god, you’re right, I do need medical attention, lots of it. Why don’t you crawl back in bed so you can concentrate on what you are doing? You’re certainly the one doctor who knows how to keep me in bed. Mmmm… I believe my mouth needs some of your special care, too.”

Teddi* slipped off her robe and climbed in next to Lee. She softly brushed her lips over his, signifying more to come.

“I promise I’ll be gentle. I’ve always been told I have a nice bedside manner.”

“And me with a whole week to check that claim out. I have to warn you, I can be very demanding.”

Lee smiled as he settled back to receive some TLC, better known as Teddi’s Loving Caresses.

******************************************************************

Dr. Theodora ‘Teddi’ Baer first appeared in The Captain’s Teddy Bear.

I wonder what TRICARE will say about the doctor’s billing. Maybe if she coded it as a physical therapy session?