Day 14 - Be My Valentine

Well, I guess this is it. Valentine’s Day. The day whether I find out whether all this was just a crazy scheme, or a way to win myself a Valentine forever.

“Yes, I’d like to order two dozen roses.”

Ross was busy on the phone with the first florist he’d found in the phone book. He knew perfectly well that the flowers and candy thing was the cheesiest, most unoriginal route to take in the entire world, but heck, it was Valentine’s Day. A guy in love could afford to be a little corny once a year.

“Yes... yes... two dozen,” he repeated. “Twenty-three red and one yellow. Delivery?” He pondered the idea for a second, then decided against it. “No, I’ll come pick them up.”

“How do I want to sign it?” He thought about the question for a minute, then a thought came to him and he smiled. “Just sign it ‘Your Secret Admirer’.”

I know you know who I am. I don’t know when you figured me out, but you know now. I saw it in your eyes yesterday. When you looked at me, there was something there that hadn’t been there before... and I knew. And I wondered... I wondered what it meant. But I didn’t say anything because you didn’t. I’ve waited this long... we’ve waited so long. I figured one day more couldn’t hurt.

So she knew. So she had understood that meaningful gaze they’d shared on the ice the previous day. Of course she had... she always did.

I saw it in your eyes....

So many exchanges, so many glances, so many thoughts and feelings he’d seen in her eyes in the eight years they’d been together. All those times when words weren’t necessary, when a simple look was enough. All leading up to this.

You won’t have to wonder much longer, he thought, looking down at the note. Soon I won’t be sitting here thinking it, talking to these notes and wishing they were actually you. There won’t be any more waiting. Just us, honey... just us.

He closed his eyes, and he could actually feel her in his arms. Who would’ve thought, eight years ago, that this girl he held in his arms every day would find herself longing for that feeling, that he’d find himself wishing she were there always... that it was where they both belonged?

Fate works in strange ways, he reminded himself. And sometimes, it takes a long road to reach your destination.

I don’t have much more to say. Fourteen days... I think I’ve said all I have to say. Everything that I’ve been feeling and thinking, it’s all been in these notes. My heart, on a page for you. It would’ve been strange, if you were anyone else... but you aren’t. And that’s why I kept writing.

If she had been any other girl, it would’ve seemed strange, he mused. Strange to sit here when he knew she loved him and he loved her back. Strange to read these confessions, these bits of another person’s heart... but it was her, and so it wasn’t strange at all. Knowing she’d made herself vulnerable for him did nothing but increase the strength of his feelings. It made him want to give her a part of himself in return.

The time was coming. He knew there would be time. Hours... days... years.

Forever.

So all I have left to say is this. You know who I am, you know where to find me, you know how I feel. All that’s left is for me to know how you feel. So if you care, if you feel the same way I do, come to me. Just come, and you don’t have to say a word... I’ll know. But if I’m wrong, if the hope I’ve held locked away that’s been growing over the past few days is wrong, just don’t say anything. Please. I’ll get over it. Don’t try to apologize or make things right somehow, because it won’t help. The only thing that will help is time.

Thank God, he prayed silently. Thank God I can give you what you deserve. Thank God we’ll be spending that time together instead of recovering from heartache.

Thank God that sometimes, no matter what complications fell in the way, no matter how unlikely it seemed, some stories had happy endings.

Or maybe, he corrected, happy beginnings. For even after all this, wasn’t this just the beginning, after all? Didn’t they have years of this... the emotions, the complications, the confessions and the crazy stories... ahead of them yet?

Happily ever after and all the stuff that went with it...

But no matter what, I’ll always care. We’ll always be soulmates. We’ll always be friends... you’ll always be my best friend. That’s how all this began, and I’m never going to forget that. Let’s never let that go.

Last night, while thinking about everything that had occured over the past two weeks, he’d sat down and popped a tape into his VCR. No, not one of their great performances, or not even one of their most romantic. It was the tape of their first tryout together, that fateful day years ago in Montreal.

Watching the tape, it had been easy to see how far they’d come, and yet, how some things never changed. The spirit he’d seen in her, that had made him pick the girl to be his partner and share his skating career, was the same spirit that was leading him to choose the woman to be his partner in another way... to share his life.

Partner, friend, soulmate... soon, another title would be added to the list.

He smiled, thinking of all the Valentines-ian terms he could use to fill the blank. Girlfriend. Sweetheart. Darling. Lover...

So that’s all. Now all I have to do is sit here and wait for you to come to me... and all you have to do is decide whether you will. I’ll be waiting.

XOX,

You-Know-Who

“Yes, I do know who,” he murmured in a tone any listener would’ve dubbed dreamy. “And you won’t have to wait long, sweetie. I’m coming.”

* * * * * * * * * *

“Sit down,” Julie ordered herself, trying to stop pacing nervously up and down her living room. “Sit down, calm down, be patient. I’ve got to be patient!”

She forced herself to sit down on the couch, but was up again after less than a minute, running into her bedroom and glancing into the mirror.

“I hate my hair,” she announced to her reflection, picking up a hairbrush and trying to fix her already immaculate blonde waves. “My hair looks awful and I look awful and what if he comes and...”

Chill out! her mind commanded. Look at yourself! You’re sitting here talking to the walls, and worrying about stupid stuff like how you look, for God’s sake. What you should be worrying about it whether he’ll come at all...

“He’s wildly in love with you. He’s always been wildly in love with you...”

Maddie’s words had been echoing in her head ever since she’d left the rink yesterday, but now, a seed of doubt began to creep into her head. Ah, Maddie thinks everyone is in love with everyone else, it told her. How do you know she’s right? Why didn’t you see it, huh? Why hasn’t he ever said anything, if it’s really been so long...

He was afraid, she thought dreamily, visions of her partner beginning to fill her head. He was scared, just like I was. He didn’t want to ruin everything, but now he knows, and doesn’t have to worry anymore. Now he’s gonna come to me...

“Oh, oh, Jupiter...”

Julie waltzed solo around her front highway to the music of the Jewel CD that was filling her apartment as it often did. She could envision the scene that awaited her, could hear his voice, could feel...

“Oh, oh, be still my little heart/Oh, oh, love is a flame neither timid nor tame...”

She twirled faster, feeling anything but timid or tame as her heart hammered in her chest, wanting, waiting...

“Fasten me to your side/Say it will be soon/You make me so crazy, baby/Could swallow the moon...” She could not stay still any longer. Sitting and waiting idly was driving her crazy. She knew what she’d written, she knew she should wait, but he wasn’t coming to her fast enough... so she’d just have to go to him. Switching off her CD player and slipping on her winter coat, she locked her door and ventured out into the snowy winter day.

* * * * * * * * * *

DING-DONG!

Ross stood expectantly outside his partner’s doorway, waiting in anticipation for her to answer. Carrying a bouquet of roses so huge that he could barely see over it, his heart beat double-time, thinking of what awaited it.

“C’mon, Julie, answer the door,” he murmured under his breath. “I’m here, sweetie... we don’t have to wait any longer.”

But no Julie came to answer the door.

Maybe she’s got the radio on or something, he thought to himself, ringing the doorbell again.

“Julie?” he called, knocking on the door. “Julie, are you in there?”

No response. He frowned, puzzled, and tried the doorknob. Locked.

“Maybe she’s out,” he told himself. “But she said she’d be waiting...”

Aw, c’mon, a voice in his mind scolded. Don’t you know her better than that? When have you ever known Julie to be patient?

A lightbulb lit up in his head.

Julie’s probably out looking for me, he realized, a smile replacing his worried look. I’ll just go back home, and she’ll be waiting...

And I won’t be there.

“Damn!” he cursed, his eyes widening in realization. Abruptly turning around, he raced down the hall and back out to his car.

I’ve got to get there before she does, he vowed. I’ve got to.

* * * * * * * * * *

He loves me, Julie was thinking, humming dreamily as she pulled up outside her partner’s place. Why did I ever doubt it? He does love me, and now I’ll finally know, now he’ll finally tell me. I’ll never have to wonder again...

Walking to the doorstep feeling as though she was floating on clouds, she knocked decisively, then stood back, waiting with scenes of kisses and tender words playing in her head.

“C’mon,” she whispered impatiently, shivering in the cold winter air. “I know you got my note, I know you know I wrote them. Here I am, here I really am. Finally...”

Hopping up and down to keep warm, she knocked again. Don’t worry about the cold, she told herself, feeling her heart accelerate in nervous anticipation. Soon I’ll be in his arms, and I’ll never have to worry about the cold again.

“He’s not home,” she finally muttered to herself. “Dammit, that’s what I get for not being able to sit still for five minutes. What if he’s at my place right now?”

Oh, God. What if he was?!

“How stupid am I?” she groaned to the skies, then dashed back to her car, hopped in, and without another thought, raced back in the direction she’d come.

* * * * * * * * * *

Driving like maniacs towards their respective homes, neither partner thought to glance at the road to see if the other had gotten the very same idea.

Drat! Ross thought, screeching into his driveway to find no Julie waiting. What if I missed her again?

Just my luck, his partner was cursing inwardly as she raced up the stairs to her apartment and found the hallway empty. Geez, Julie, when will you ever learn?

Then, each pacing frustratedly in two separate locations, the partners shared a united thought.

The rink!

The rink, Julie thought feverishly. I wrote that he’d know where to find me... what if he got the wrong idea and went to the rink?

The rink, Ross realized in a flash. Maybe she meant I should find her at the rink. Oh, God, maybe she’s been waiting there all this time!

A place so similar to the one in which they’d first set eyes on each other. The place they spent most of their time together. The one home they both shared...

Of course it’s the rink, both partners thought simultaneously. I have to get there, now!

* * * * * * * * * *

Rushing through the main entrance of the rink without paying any attention whatsoever to where she was going or who stood in her way, Julie stopped and looked wildly around.

Oh, please, God, she prayed to any deity who was listening. Please let him be here. Oh, please, oh, please...

Running in through the opposite door, her partner was doing his best to search the lobby while maintaining his grasp on the roses.

Julie, where are you? he wondered. Be here. Just this once, let things go right. Let her be here...

Both partners made a mad dash for the entrance that lead to the ice... and ran smack into each other.

Roses scattered everywhere as Ross lost his grip on the bouquet and threw his arms out in an effort to maintain his balance. Instead, completely accidentally, his partner fell into them... and straightened up to find herself in his arms.

“Ross,” she whispered in a voice that sounded far away.

“Julie, I...” Every word he’d prepared had suddenly flown out of his mind. “The roses, they... they were for you.”

Overcome with emotion, she bit her lip, feeling the tears welling up in her eyes. It was real. He was here, and she was in his arms. Her partner. Her best friend. The man she loved. Finally, finally, there were no more doubts.

Unable to think of a word to say, she leaned over and started to gather up the roses, marvelling at their beauty. They were crimson red, with perfect emerald green leaves... and, she noticed, a single dazzling yellow one among them

Yellow roses, the flower of friendship. Red roses, the flower of love...

She was stopped by a touch on her shoulder.

“Forget the roses for a minute,” he whispered, looking into her eyes.

She gazed back, and without another word, she let the roses fall from her hands and fell back into his arms. He held her tightly as she clung to him, closing her eyes and resting her head against his chest.

“At last,” she whispered, barely able to get the words out. “Oh, Ross... at last.”

“You knew, though, didn’t you, sweetheart?” he murmured, kissing the top of her head as he cradled her close. “You knew I’d come.”

Revelling in the feeling of being nestled in his arms without having to hide, she reluctantly pulled away and reached into her coat pocket, pulling out another red envelope.

“Wouldn’t you like to see the last note?” she asked softly.

Smiling curiously, he took the envelope, opened it, and pulled out the final note. On the same cream-coloured stationary, but this time in her own handwriting, were the four words he’d been longing to see since Day 1...

I love you.

~ Julie

“I know,” he said tenderly, leaning over to gently caress her cheek. “And you know, too, Julie... you know I love you, too.”

She nodded wordlessly, trying to keep her tears of joy from spilling over.

“From the very first day, I wished it was you,” he confessed, realizing it was his turn to reveal. “I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone else. Oh, Julie... if you only knew how long I’ve cared...”

“Shhh...” She lifted a finger to his lips to silence him, then took his hands in hers and drew him closer. He understood, and seconds later, his lips were on hers in a kiss that held all the longing, all the desire, all the fears and emotions of the past fourteen days in its blissful sweetness.

“Woo hoo!”

The partners’ little dreamworld was suddenly interrupted by a piercing whistle.

“Way to go, lovebirds!” Maddie called from on ice. “Action at last!”

Julie and Ross looked at Maddie, then at each other, and burst out laughing, holding onto each other for support.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, my love,” Julie said through her giggles, pulling him back down to kiss her once again.

“To you, too, my secret admirer,” he returned with a teasing grin. “Will you be my Valentine?”

“Of course,” she whispered, leading him into a corner and murmuring consent as he trailed kisses along the outline of her face. “You’ve just found yourself a Valentine forever.”

The End