Claimer: I own everybody in this including myself. Get permission to use them from me. I'm pretty giving so I shouldn't have a problem. Thanks: To Tracey who inspired the idea, and to my own insanity. ******* Chaos: Welcome to Tea and Crumpets, we're your hosts. I'm Chaos, the Lord of Disorder and Destruction, Sworn Enemy of the Order of Time. And that's Chronos, the Messenger Boy. Chronos: Shut up, Little Boy Blue! Chaos: Has-been! Chronos: Never-was! *Chaos and Chronos glare at each and get ready to fight* Patti: Enough! Chronos: Who the bloody hell are you? Patti: I'm your creator, Patti. Chaos: I thought our creator was named Ricia. Patti: I am Ricia! Patricia or Patti or Ricia. See I'm called Patti in RL and Ricia on the net. Patricia is my full name and... *Chronos and Chaos have fallen asleep* Patti: Wake up already! You've got a show to do! Chaos: *groans* Why? Patti: Because I said so! And I'm the master of you, Lord Chaos. Chronos: Ha! She told you Chaos! Patti: That goes for you too, Chronos! *Chronos pouts while Chaos laughs* Patti: Now start over and this time behave. Chronos and Chaos: Yes oh mistress of all! Patti: I'm going to pretend that wasn't sarcastic. Chaos: You do that. *cheesy music starts up* Chronos: Now once again, welcome to Tea and Crumpets. We're your hosts, Chronos and Chaos. On today's show we have...uh...what do we have Chaos? Chaos: Huh? I'm sorry I blanked out. What did you say? Chronos: What's on today's show? Chaos: How should I know? You're the organized one. Chronos: You mean we have no guests?? Chaos: Guess not. More crumpets for us! Chronos: Good point! *they munch on crumpets and sip tea for awhile. Finally by cause of sheer boredom Patti pushes on Erik and Vincent to be guests* Chaos: Erik and Vincent? Who are they? Chronos: The Sacrifice and the Victim. Chaos: Oh that's pleasant! And you people are the good guys? Vincent: You ate all the crumpets. Erik: And drank all the tea. Chronos: So? You're dead. Erik: Doesn't mean we don't like crumpets. Chaos: Well go buy your own. Now let's begin the interveiw. So...Vincent, how does it feel to have no personality? Vincent: I have a personality! Chaos: No you don't! Vincent: Yes I do! And I want some crumpets! Chaos: I don't care what you want, you...who the hell are you again? Chronos: He's the Victim. He was killed by the first Fedora TimeKeeper, Sebastien. Chaos: Why? Chronos: He was in the way. Chaos: The good guys, ladies and gentlemen. Nothing says 'we're the heros of the stories" like senseless homicide. Chronos: Shut up! At least we didn't try to destory all life and twist the universe to our sick vision. Chaos: No, the universe was already twisted to your sick vision. Erik: Um...are we being interveiwed? Vincent: C'mon Erik, lets go see if Patti has any more crumpets. *they leave, our hosts bicker for awhile but then notice the guests are gone* Chaos: Hey where'd they go? Chronos: Who cares. On our next show we'll be learning how to make a thermal nuclear weapon from sawdust and chewing gum. Chaos: We will?? Really? Chronos: Probably not. *cheesy music starts up* return to OFAP