Welcome To
Welcome To
My Mom's
Memorial Page
MOM
November 13, 1951 - July 16, 1996
I
started to understand their loss when my own mom died July 16,
1996 at the age of 44. Too young. She like her mother died from
asthma. I remember the day she died all too well, yet at the same
time it is a blur. I know I was in shock when the doctors told me
she had died. Then became violently ill. My whole world collapsed
in on me. Became even worse when I realized my daughter no longer
had a grandma and I had to tell her. I wanted to die rather than
go home to tell my daughter this heart wrenching news. To die
would have been so much easier and would relieve me of my pain.
The pain comsumed me completely. I am not sure how I functioned
for the next week. I made my first trip to a funeral home,
planned my first funeral, and attended my first funeral, my moms.
Being my mom's only child, I had all of the responsibilities and
none of the experience. I didn't sleep for the next 3 days, and
couldn't eat for 5. Due to grief I was physically ill and
emotionally wounded to the core. I was so numb yet so raw. I felt
everything, but felt nothing. I spent most of the day of the
funeral outside of myself, observing life as I knew it dying
before me. I survived that day and many more since then, most
have been hard though. The pain will always be there but it is
starting to become less with time.
One thing that has brought me some comfort is that my mom was an
organ donor. In the past 2 years over 86 persons have been a
recipient of my mom's donations. The American Red Cross has been
wonderfully supportive to me. They supply me with a list several
times a year, that has limited information on the recipients. I
get to learn their age, gender, city, type of operation, and what
they recieved. It is very rewarding to know that a small part of
my mom lives on. Even in death she is improving others lives.
I am very proud of my mom. I am proud to be her daughter. I also
thank God for blessing me with the best mom possible, even if for
a limited time. I love her and miss her with all that I am.
