The Warren Beatty Story

by

Erik "No Mousepad" Johnson

One upon a time, many years ago when I was in a minor midwestern college my friend [names changed to protect those who may not like world distribution of this story] ..uh, Gwen Stefani! Yeah Gwen and I were sitting around talking as we are oft to do and it just so happened that neither of us could remember the actor was who starred with Madonna in the lackluster film "Dick Tracy". Try as we might, neither of us could dredge up his name. Inexplicably, some time later Gwen Stefani and I were having sex. Now my mind is always working, even when I'm working on something else, and before I realized it I said "Warren Beatty!" Gwen stopped and said "What?" I said "You know, from the movie!" but it still took me the better part of ten minutes to explain why I was shouting out Warren Beatty's name while we were having sex.

And now, thanks to the Warren Beatty story you can be "in" with the "in-crowd"! Next time you can't go somewhere because it's closed, a crime scene, or what have you, just tell the Warren Beatty story and doors will fly open.

Wow, good story!