BLACK
NOVEMBER
When I was a young turkey,
new to the coop,
My big brother Mike
took me out on the
stoop,
Then he sat me down,
and he spoke
real slow,
And he told me there was something
that I had to know;
His look and his tone
I
will always remember,
When he told me of the
horrors
of..... Black November;
"Come about August,
now listen to me,
Each day you'll get
six meals
instead of just three,
"And soon
you'll be thick,
where once you were thin,
And
you'll grow a big rubbery thing
under your
chin;
"And then one morning,
when you're
warm in your bed,
In'll burst the farmer's
wife,
and hack off your head;
"Then she'll
pluck out all your feathers
so you're bald 'n
pink,
And scoop out all your insides
and leave
ya lyin' in the sink;
"And then comes the worst part"
he said not bluffing,
"She'll spread your cheeks
and pack your rear with stuffing".
Well, the rest of his words
were too grim to
repeat,
I sat on the stoop
like a winged piece
of meat,
And decided on the spot
that to
avoid being cooked,
I'd have to lay low
and
remain overlooked;
I began a new diet
of
nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads,
juice
and diet cola;
And as they ate pastries,
chocolates and crepes,
I stayed in my room
doing Jane Fonda tapes;
I maintained my
weight
of two pounds and a half,
And tried not
to notice
when the bigger birds laughed;
But 'twas I who was laughing,
under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed,
ever closer to
death;
And sure enough
when Black November
rolled around,
I was the last turkey
left in
the entire compound;
So now I'm a pet
in
the farmer's wife's lap;
I haven't a worry,
so
I eat and I nap;
She held me today,
while
sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and
said:
"Christmas is
coming..."
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