- You keep wondering whose yaks those are .......
- The castle priest says he has converted to a new order. What the hell is a Cippist anyway?
- You notice that your Prime Minister seems shorter than before, and his mustache keeps falling off.
- You notice that there is hot, running water in the garderobe ... and in the kitchen... and in the moat!
- You fired your food taster for refusing to come to work two weeks ago, and still no applications for the job.
- All the 'The King is a Fink!' graffiti has been replaced with 'The King is a really nice guy who shouldn't worry about anything.'
- You find 'Now Open Under New Management' signs hidden under the stairs.
- Someone seems to have drunk all the best beer and other potables.
- And the stuff they bring YOU to drink tastes and smells like fermenting horse milk.
- Red and Black seem to be popular choices for clothing this season.
- You don't remember THAT many lightning bolt motifs in the decorations.
- There is candle wax residue on the key to your treasure vault.
- And the one to your weapons locker...and the one to your secret exit...
- And the one to your wife's chastity belt.
- Your foreign advisors tell you all your neighbors are suddenly willing to wait to settle border disputes, saying they anticipate a 'more agreeable climate soon.'
- The gardener is replanting the rose garden as a circle, with red ones on one side and black ones on the other.
- And has asked for yellow ones 'for accent to enhance the effect.'
- All the guard stations are now furnished with soft pillows and warm blankets.
- And their rations now include a lot of that missing booze.
- The new cook sure likes to use almond flavoring in the cookies.
- And the busboys suddenly seem to be wearing a lot more knives.
- And so are the chambermaids, for that matter.
- Come to think of it, so is your daughter.
And the number one sign your castle has been infiltrated by Dark Horde ninja ...
- Everything SEEMS perfectly normal ....
