LION... OR LAMB?

Do you growl or do you cower?

Take our test and find out!

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Now, answer ALL OF the following as honestly as you can. It is best to give your first immediate instinctive answer rather than pondering the question at length.

You must give an answer to every question, even if you feel there is no "right" answer, or you will not receive a score. Some of the questions deliberately put you in a pickle to see how you rationalize your way out of it.

Ready? GO!


  1. You meet a person who is a master of a skill you want to know. You say to this person:
    I always wished I knew how to do that.
    One of these days I'm going to learn that too.
    So, tell me. How do you do that?
    Are you available for hire to teach me that?
    How did you learn to do that?

  2. If money, ability to learn and opportunity to go to school were no problem, how high would your education go?
    High School
    Associate Degree
    Bachelors Degree
    Masters Degree
    Doctorate Degree

  3. Your strongest (i.e., best grades) subject in school is/was:
    Literature/Writing
    Mathematics
    Science
    History
    Humanities/Art

  4. When asked a question that you do not know how to answer, you tend to say:
    I'll look that up and get back with you.
    I don't know.
    There are so many possible answers to that, I really shouldn't pin one down.
    What do you think?
    That's easy! It's ... (you guess)

  5. How long do you think before answering a question?
    I don't have to think.
    Always just 2-3 seconds.
    However long it takes to get the answer right.
    Depends on the question.
    Varies, but usually only 2-3 seconds.

  6. You were just stood up on a date at a nightclub - the date just never showed up. You:
    Call your date's home number every 10 minutes until you get them.
    Call every hospital and the police.
    Look around the club and ask someone else out.
    Go home embarrassed, vowing never to talk to that person again.
    Stay at the club and complain to the bartender the rest of the night.

  7. You see a "help the children" commercial showing a particularly pitiful looking child, asking for $5 a week to sponsor a child in need. You:
    Ignore it.
    Wish you had the money to spare.
    Have the money, but don't trust the sponsoring organization.
    Send money and sponsor a child, whether or not you can afford to.
    Decide to help a family in your own neighborhood.

  8. When traveling by car on a long trip, you prefer:
    To drive.
    To navigate, but not drive.
    To be driven, and not help with directions.
    To split the driving.
    To fly - skip driving!

  9. When going out for a night on the town, you more frequently:
    Leave the decision as to where to go up to your companion(s).
    Decide where and what you all will do.
    Let each person choose an activity and do all of them.
    Only go out when your friend(s) have already made plans - and just go along for the ride.
    Prefer to avoid very intimate settings, going to very public events.

  10. When lending money to a friend or loved one, you:
    Consider it a gift and don't really expect to be paid back.
    Draw up a written legal contract for repayment, and enforce it.
    Avoid it - you don't lend money.
    Loan it, then pester your friend for the pay back.
    Loan it, then attach "strings" that require the borrower to perform favors to "repay" the loan by their actions.

  11. God is:
    One supreme being that made humans in His image.
    Many beings. Which one do you mean?
    Nothing. There is no God.
    The sum of all life.
    An extraterrestrial life form superior to humans.

  12. About the afterlife, which best fits your beliefs:
    When you're dead, you're dead. There is no afterlife.
    You reincarnate into another human life.
    You reincarnate into a higher or lower animal/human, depending on how you lived.
    You go to Heaven, Purgatory, or Hell, after Judgment.
    You become a spiritual form that either travels alone or with other spirits.

  13. When driving on a multiple lane highway, you tend to:
    Always pass any vehicle you come up behind so you are always ahead of the pack.
    Find a comfortable speed and maintain it no matter what.
    Get behind a semi truck moving at a reasonable speed and stick with it.
    Feel pressured to go faster than is really comfortable for you.
    Drive in the passing lane the whole way.

  14. In your home, you are most likely the person who:
    Checks all the windows and door locks before bed even though you know you locked them yourself already earlier in the evening.
    Notices when the basic household necessities are running low and need to be restocked.
    Picks up after everyone.
    Performs the more nurturing duties - cooking, cleaning, pet care, child care, ironing, etc.
    Lands on the couch with the remote and doesn't budge until bed time.

  15. Feminine hygiene commercials (tampons, douche, etc.) and/or jock itch commercials:
    Embarrass you.
    Don't affect you.
    Are of great interest to you.
    Make you laugh.
    Affect you no more or less than any other commercial.

  16. You hear a "bump in the night" you can't identify. You:
    Grab a weapon and search the house.
    Grab a flashlight and search the house.
    Go back to sleep. You don't care what it is.
    Bury under the covers and lay awake the rest of the night.
    Call the police then hide in the closet.

  17. You order furniture delivered. The delivery folk are having a hard time assembling it, and you know how to do it. You:
    Watch and let them suffer.
    Make gentle "hands-off" suggestions.
    Push them aside and do it yourself while they watch.
    Tell them you'll do it and escort them back to their truck.
    Dive in and help out without saying much.

  18. During a crisis, do you tend to:
    Offer suggestions and assistance.
    Make a hasty retreat until it's all over.
    Take charge and make firm, quick decisions.
    Stand by and watch everyone react to the crisis.
    Consult with others and try to guide them into making intelligent decisions.

  19. When it comes to professional sports, you prefer to watch:
    Football or Soccer.
    Nothing. Sports are boring.
    Baseball or Basketball.
    Golf or Swimming.
    Only specials like the Olympics.

  20. When invited to attend a sports event, you:
    Find a way out of going and skip it.
    Paint your face and body your team's colors and go "in costume".
    Hoot, whistle, jump up and down, cuss the refs, holler and scream throughout the game.
    Sit quietly and watch the game.
    Camp out by the locker room door afterwards and get athlete’s autographs.

  21. When you met your recent/last partner (or plan to meet one), you:
    Were first asked out by your partner.
    Met at an event you both attended and sort of fell together.
    Asked your partner out first.
    Talked a friend into asking your partner if they'd date you.
    Met through an advertisement.

  22. You are in a committed relationship/marriage. Your partner has a good, local job. You just got a great opportunity with your job, but it requires a move to ... shall we say a rather faraway location. If you turn it down, you lose your job all together. You:
    Talk it over with your partner.
    Tell your partner "we're going to the Moon Alice!"
    Tell your partner "I'm going to Moon!"
    Turn down the offer.
    Go with whichever job pays more.

  23. Alright - this is the BIG question. Who has control over the TV remote?
    What remote? Don't have one.
    You keep it under lock and key in your exclusive control.
    You don't even know where it is.
    Whoever gets it first has it for the night.
    You share it by agreement with your co-watcher(s).

  24. When cuddling with a lover, do you more often:
    Hold your lover.
    Let your lover hold you.
    Prop your feet up in your lover's lap.
    Hold your lover's feet in your lap.
    Tangle up together.

  25. The side of the bed on which you sleep...
    Affects the quality of sleep you get.
    Sort of matters; you don't really care.
    Doesn't matter at all - in fact, you often switch sides.
    Is of utmost importance to your comfort.
    Is moot - you sleep wherever you collapse for the night.

  26. A family is:
    People related by blood or marriage.
    People who band together for emotional support.
    A unit with a household head, a child raiser, and children.
    Only a person, their partner, and those two people's mutual children.
    The human race.

  27. Pets are:
    Family members.
    Nuisances.
    Nice companions, but after all they're just animals.
    Good for kids, but not really an adult thing.
    Not just animals - some people make good pets.

  28. Assuming you are over the age of 21 and the person(s) who raised you are living. You:
    Do everything they tell you to do.
    Can't answer this because you've been on the streets since you were five.
    Ignore their advice.
    Listen to their advice, sometimes following it, sometimes not.
    Do not communicate with them.

  29. Older members of the family (i.e., aged Parents, Grandparents, older Aunts/Uncles):
    Should be put in a home for the elderly.
    Are welcome to live in your home.
    Need your constant assistance.
    Are important to listen to.
    Are on their own and not your problem.

  30. Children up to age 12:
    Should be seen and not heard.
    Should be talked with as if they are miniature adults.
    Are not responsible for their actions.
    Must be told everything to do from how to play to how to clean their rooms.
    Are naturally honest until they are given a reason to lie.

  31. Complete this sentence: I prefer to be:
    The Boss.
    The Owner.
    Retired.
    Told what to do.
    Middle Management.

  32. Complete this sentence: I prefer to:
    Work with my hands.
    Work alone.
    Work at home.
    Work with the general public.
    Work with a small team.

  33. The most important job habit is:
    Being on time to work.
    Being willing to work extra, regardless of pay.
    Getting the job done right.
    Getting the job done on time.
    Dressing correctly for the job.

  34. You are entrusted with a valuable company secret, and the competition appeals to you to buy the information from you. You:
    Tell them to kiss off. No way!
    Depends on how much they offer.
    Name your price.
    Tell your boss.
    Contact a third party and start a bidding war.

  35. You learn that your supervisor is stealing from the company. You:
    Tell nobody.
    Confront your boss.
    Tell personnel.
    Go up the ladder and tell his or her boss.
    Leave the company.

  36. You have guests in your home. At bedtime, you:
    Go to bed when you are tired.
    Go to bed the same time you always do.
    Go to bed only after the guests are asleep.
    Stay up all night partying.
    Keep your guests up until you are tired.

  37. Your friend told you a lie and you have proof it was untrue. You:
    Say nothing.
    Confront the friend.
    Tell another friend.
    Rationalize that they have a different point of view.
    Just stop seeing the friend, without explanation.

  38. When dining out you prefer to:
    Pick up the tab yourself.
    Split the tab.
    Avoid eating out unless you can afford to pick up the tab for the entire table.
    Be treated.
    Not do it at all - you don't trust food you didn't cook yourself.

  39. When buying holiday gifts, you tend to:
    Buy one medium price range gift for each person on your list.
    Skip it. You don't give gifts.
    Buy the cheapest thing you can find.
    Get the most extravagant, obviously expensive gift you can afford.
    Buy lots of inexpensive things to stack up as a pile of gifts for just one person.

  40. When you first hook up with a new romantic partner, you tend to:
    Ignore your lover's friends and spend time with just your friends.
    Help your partner see how their friends aren't good for them, including them with your friends instead.
    Include your partner's friends into your social circle.
    Give up all your friends and spend time just with your lover's friends.
    Accept your lover's casual friends, but exclude your lover's best friend.

  41. Assume you live in a low crime area. You:
    Sometimes leave your doors unlocked.
    Always lock your doors.
    Lock your doors only if you are not home.
    Lock your doors and use an alarm system.
    Never lock your doors.

  42. Your roommate/partner/neighbor makes a huge mess in your yard. You:
    Tell them to clean it up.
    Clean it up yourself, cheerfully.
    Ignore it. Maybe it will rain away.
    Make a show of cleaning it up, in front of them.
    Pick it up and dump it in their room/yard.

  43. With regard to household chores, you tend to:
    Take on all the "heavy" chores.
    Divide the chores evenly, trading out from week to week.
    Do nothing. You assume the elves do it at night.
    Only do those chores that most visibly show you were housecleaning.
    Do everything.

  44. Which room in the house is the most important for you to be in charge of its organization?
    Kitchen
    Bedroom
    Bathroom
    Living rooms
    Office

  45. When moving into a new house, do you tend to:
    Hire a decorator.
    Work with partner or friend to make the place look exactly like that picture in the magazine.
    Let your partner make all the decorating decisions.
    Make all the decisions yourself and sell your partner's tacky stuff in a yard sale.
    Split the decorating room by room.

  46. When discussing knowledge about a particular topic you have studied or learned, you:
    Are open to discussing the topic if someone else mentions it.
    Are hesitant to discuss the topic.
    Discuss it at length with anyone.
    Will only discuss it with others knowledgeable about the topic.
    Will only discuss it with people who know nothing about the topic.

  47. You style/brush your hair:
    Hourly.
    Whenever you pass a mirror or glass and see yourself.
    Usually only when you get up in the morning.
    Never. It does its own thing.
    What hair?

  48. What color do you wear most?
    Black
    Red or Orange
    Whatever blends with the surroundings
    Environmental colors - greens, browns, blues
    What looks best on you, in all color ranges

  49. When you smile, you:
    Can't answer this - you never smile.
    Hide your smile behind your hand.
    Show all your teeth.
    Show some teeth, but not a wide grin.
    Smile without opening your mouth.

  50. What is most important for you to control?
    Your money.
    Your home environment.
    Who your friends are.
    Your work environment.
    Your lover.


Have you answered ALL the questions? Then hit this button:

If you found this test disturbing, bitch to JADE, who takes sole responsibility for writing the analysis.

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This test was first posted November 5, 1998.

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