GRAMMARIANS UNITE - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - AMERICAN LANGUAGE ON ENDANGERED SPECIES LIST --------------------------------------------
Would you want to see this headline in your local newspaper ?
AMERICAN LANGUAGE
Difficult To Learn To Use Easy To Use To Learn
P U N S Y O U C O U L D D Y E F O R
PUNS MAY BE PUNS MAYBE
To stay healthy, it pays to be cheerful instead of being grumpy. Because the surly bird catches the germ.
There is a new fishing lure on the market. It is guaranteed to get a pike's pique.
A sign seen outside a bankrupt bookstore: WORDS FAILED US
DAFFY DEFINITIONS
Archaeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.
Debate: What attracts de fish.
Flood: A stream which is too big for it's bridges.
Hangover: The "Wrath of Grapes."
Pillage: About sixteen for most girls.
LANGUAGE ODDITIES
Sign on an Optometrist's display window: If you don't see what you want, you've come to the right place.
Someone didn't have much to do, the day they put the 'G' in Gnat and Gnu.
Why are 'through' and "threw" pronounced the same way?
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IS THAT IS THAT
Arrange the four words, above, and punctuate them to make an understandable sentence.
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Use the word 'AND' 5 times in succession, to make an understandable sentence. Use no intervening words.
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Use the form at the bottom of this page to send your solutions to me. I will reply to your submisson concerning its validity.
EDITORIAL COMMENT
All the word play on this page, and throughout this entire website, was used intentionally and deliberately. It was included to show the vagaries of the American language and what can be accomplished with this astounding medium, largely. It is 'wonderful' to see and hear proper American language used properly by Americans. But lately, it is being 'butchered' unmercifully.
Both me and you know this is true; ya know? But you and I should know better.
Please use the form, below, to send your comments to me. If there is a pun, or any odd use of the American language, that you would like to see included on this page, please include it with your comments. Proper credit will be given when used. Don't forget to include your name or e-mail address.