Game Report!

Disclaimer:  Read at your own risk.

Fans of our page know how this works.  We go to a game and do a report afterwards.  Kevin sends me his text, and then I add my text and the photos.

Kevin aka Melvin = Normal text.

Scott aka Leaf Fanatic = [bold text in these square brackets]

Ok so this is the 3rd game we goto this year. However this time it is in Ottawa and game 3 of the playoffs. Scott is going to brag about how he got the tickets and all that but just ignore his rants. They are getting old and tired. :) That is the only big shot I will take at him this report but it had to be done. [Do the math people - three games - three sets of tickets all acquired by Scott.  I truly am "Awesome" :)  Actually it was quite lucky.  I was surfing the ticketmaster web site and noticed tickets for round one at the Corel Centre were for sale.  Knowing at that time that the Sens might play the Leafs in the first round but still unsure...I took the gamble and snagged them.  Paid off!  Anyway, it seems as though it is my job to get the tickets and get us to the event.  Other intangibles are left to Kevin.  Such as his statement on the Saturday prior to this trip - "I'm going to get us some face paint and some of those big white and blue afro wigs" - of course this didn't happen.  He also stated that he was going to paint his gut....that didn't happen to my knowledge either.   At least he did his navigating job good....even though we only really take one road all the way to Kanata from Peterborough and just have to take the proper exit which is impossible to miss since you can see the Corel Centre clearly from a mile away.]

So we head out at about 12:30 or so and ahve to stop to get film and whatever else. [Kevin has to stop off at a "co-workers" should have got some pictures of that, his wife would love them.  <jk>.  Ah, she trusts him...about as much as a pit bull in a school yard]. We finally get that then Scott has to stop at home cause he forgets some things. He checks the oil in the car and adds some. I have some great action shots of him doing this for those that care to see. [You got me people, I have no idea why he is taking pictures of me filling the car with oil.  Anyway, by the time we leave my place it is almost 1:00 p.m.]

Moving towards the engine!                                              Under the hood with the oil bottle open!
 

   
Pouring the oil!                                                                    Pouring the oil - sidearm action!
 

So we start heading to Kanata not Ottawa lets not forget that Ottawa does not play right in Ottawa. So we stop for some gas and food and drink in Kaladar then we continue on the journey. [Wait a sec.... Kevin's time line is all screwed up already.  It's like he was on a different trip or something.  Anyway, we leave my place and hit highway 7.] Scott is drinking his water when he spills it all over his crotch area. [!!!] I of course break out in laughter which makes Scott laugh and get pissed at me. I ask him if he has a towel of course the anser is no. While this is happening Scott hands me his bottle of water to hold for him however I think that he wants me to put it back in the bag. Boy am I wrong, there is no lid on the thing this I did not know and so I drop it in the bag not thinking. After a few more minutes of laughter and me insulting him he wants his water back. I look down and relize that it has leak inside the bag. This results in more laughter. The whole time this is going on Scott is still soak and I am still laughing (almost crying at this point). So the bag is full of water and I need to get rid of it. Scott tells me to just through it out. [I probably asked him to jump out] I can not do this cause we are not in Kanata yet and if I am going to litter I am going to do it on Ottawa territory. Anyhow I didn't through it out the window instead I just put a rip in the bag and drained the water. This leads to the water running down my sleeve on my jacket. I make the mistake of saying that is fine cause the coat is waterproof. Well Scott wants it so that he can put it on the seat to dry up the water. I give in and give him the coat. [Okay, lets get the facts correct  here.  I get my bottle of water from Kevin and have to open it while driving, so I do what I always do, put the bottle between my legs and pull the top off.  Unfortunately the some water popped out of the top and all over the place.  Pretty funny... Kevin would have you believe that I'm pissed off at this but I'm actually laughing and doing all kinds of antics trying to dry off - like tilting the car vents towards the area of spillage and thrusting that area towards the vents.  Kev's worried about the truck driver behind us seeing these antics and wondering what the hell is going on hahhah.  So while I'm trying to get dry I give Kevin my bottle of water - no top, and he puts it on the floor and it leaks all over the place.  What an idiot.  But who cares....it's only water.  Now if I spill maple syrup all over my crotch...then I'll be pissed.  Ya, I managed to weasel the jacket out of Kev...hahahhahhah...should have seen me try to get that jacket under me while driving....very funny.  <snip - large discussion on how cup holders in cars suck>  On route a big transport passes us going the other way with a Leaf flag on the front - we get all excited (it doesn't take much when it comes to the playoffs).  Since it is the 12:00 hour - we're listening to the "All request Nooner" on the Wolf 101.5 (Peterborough Classic Rock).  The guy that DJ's that show is a big Sens fan so Kevin is trying to call the guy on his cell phone to taunt him but he never got through.  Kevin's also singing away to a pile of tunes including Sass Jordan and Ben Harper.  Finally we roll into Kaladar (see the top line to see how screwed up Kevin's time line is).  Ahhh, it sure it good to get out of that wet seat :)  Grab some chips and pop and gas and hit the road again.  Kaladar is about the half way point of the trip but it felt like we got there in about half an hour, likely because we were laughing so hard at the water fiasco.  I've straightened out Kev's jacket on my seat now.....ahh...I'm much happier...getting dryer.  Kevin has some good ideas while we were driving up - example: "Why didn't we bus up?" - hey good idea, a little late but a good idea.  Example #2:  We should have brought a camcorder - another good idea but a little late as well.]

Ok well enough of the coat I am sure Scott will have some things to say about that. We continue the drive and as we get closer we tune into the local radio stations.[Ottawa stations] They are slamming the leafs like you would not believe. The start to talk about Marshy's bar. It is in the Corel Centre. They talk about this cone they have woth a picture of Domi on it and how they are going to have some contest with it to win tickets. I tell Scott that we have to go there. [Scott is in total agreement :)  Kevin continues singing which starts to piss me off.  You know that song "Jet" by McCartney and Wings?  Well he was right into that and "Dream On" by Aerosmith.]
 

Now we make it to the Corel Centre [Our only stop on the way up was the brief stop in Kaladar] and we figure we are smart not many cars there yet so we get great parking right at the base of the Arena.(this was a mistake you will find out wy later) [This place is bizarre - a great big stadium out in the middle of no where....tonnes of parking.  We pull into the parking lot and to our surprise the parking attendant doesn't give us any problems.  However, as soon as we park the car another car pulls up besides us and the guy getting out tells us "you can't come in here" referring to the fact that we are Leaf fans  - this is going to be interesting!]  Anyhow we head to the Bar and on the way we buy a couple of Leaf Flags to wave in front of any senators fan we can find. [I've got the Leafs "away" (that's blue) Leaf replica Jersey on - very noticeable to these Sen fans.  Kevin's wearing a Leaf T-shirt - not bad but someone should buy this guy a Leaf Jersey for crying out loud  (there's a subtle hint for any of his family members that read this).  Anyway, it turns out we parked (and believe me there were plenty of options of where to park) right near this bar called Marshy's that we heard on the radio.  I got my Leaf Jersey, and my Leaf flag and my slightly demented Leaf friend...so off to the bar :) ]

We hit the bar and right away we are booed. No big deal we expect that to happen. There are a smattering of  Leafs fans in the bar. [Man oh man....  There's this big Bear mascot there - the mascot for the Ottawa radio station "The Bear"  well this bear bends over in front of me and motions for me to kiss his ass!!!!  He's also got a picture of Domi on his ass with a target on his face.  Hostile crowd, I like this.
 
 

We head for the far end of the bar and buy some beer. I am not going to drink all that much cause you know we have to drive back and what not. WE GET HAMMERED! [ :) ] We buy a glass of draft. The bar tender already hates us. Somewhere in between the 1st and second glass of beer he calls Scott an asshole. Uncalled for the bartender was a total knob. [As I recall we walk up to the end of the bar and approach for beer.  This bartender looks at us straight faced and says "You guys got some balls coming in here"  He's got that right.  But he gets us beer and that's his job so who cares about his attitude.  Upon finishing my beer (Kev's only half way done his) he says "Another beer asshole?" hahhahha...such hostility. But once again, the guy kept the beers coming and that's what is important...furthermore, he didn't spit in them.
 
 

Remember the Sens are down 2 games to 0 at this point in time.  I really like our spot at the bar - we had to stand but who cares, we had the rail and we just finished sitting in a car for 3 hours.  But best of all we had a bartender who genuinely disliked us just because we were Leaf fans.  I head off to the washroom (they were really big drafts!) and upon coming out of the washroom two Sen fans walk in and boo me.... :)  We're chatting away and they say "Even you must want Ottawa to win?" I say "Nope, I hope the Leafs sweep...."  This is getting good.  So far I've already interacted with more people than either of the Leaf games we attended....I also had a legitimate shot at tackling a bear mascot......cool.    I'm telling you, when you're the enemy people like to get your attention.  I get back to the bar and start to drink some more, it helps ease the stress and tension.  The girl from the TV Station R/O is there.  Long black hair...stunning looking woman.  She was actually nice to us.  I guess being a TV personality she kind of has to - so far only two people were nice - the woman from R/O (she was hot) and the parking guy.  Kev is now claiming (weeks after this trip) that the R/O girl is really a Leaf fan and that she just wore the Sens jersey because of her job....makes sense, all the good looking women are Leaf fans (ya right, I wish).

At one point some guy pulls a 8.5 x 11 piece of paper off my back and says "Someone stuck this on your back..." I'm laughing at this...I figure it was that damn bear - that bear was up to no good!  Anyway, I give the paper to Kevin - the sheet reads something like "Go Sens Go".  Kev holds it up for the bar to see, rips it in half, and then....well I think he crumpled it up and chewed it up and spit it out but I'm not entirely sure what he did with it.

There are a lot of good looking women working at this bar, Kev and I can hardly believe it.  I know Brad Marsh owns this bar but who the hell does his hiring for him?  There's another stunning girl across the bar from us...reminds me of the girl from the Dorito's commercial (you know, she's in the laundry mat doing the splits and stuff)......without the big breasts and with lighter coloured hair.  Anyway, Kev spotted her as well.  Kev spots a large pair of breasts (you know he's into the beer now when he's looking for breasts) They were big but the girl was kinda chubby which is a turnoff for me.  I mean that's like big tires on a big truck - you expect it.  I'm much more of a leg man anyway.  But we're having some fun in this bar!!! More and more Leafs fan gather at this point. [They come and stand near us cause we are like "Leaf Central" in this bar.] Scott and I are onto about the 3rd beer [note: Scott is always one beer ahead of Kevin]  at this point and we start chanting "GO LEAFS GO" I have to say the 2 of us got that bar going. [Baby!!!  By this point in time we have this bar rockin! Kevin's is correct that we had the Go Leafs Go chant going and the Sen fans would retaliate with Go Sens Go.  Then we get the "Baaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssooooooooooooo!!!" chant going.  This was great!!!]

I head off to the bathroom now and when I come back scott has 2 full beers in front of him. [ :) ] He tells me some leaf fan bought it for him. I freak out. I start waving the old Leaf flag when the waitress comes over with a beer for me. This is great. [Kev likes his free beer almost as much as me] A few Leafs fans are beside us now and we are going nuts. Now this is where I get messed up cause the details are vague here cause of the beer so Scott will have to help out if I mess up. I believe the Leaf fan now buys us a picture of beer and we are going nuts. [Ya, Kev's got about a half hour gap in this section.  He must've been feeling no pain.  The guy buying us beer sends over a pitcher.  I'm liking this.  Kev gets all worried - "How are we going to get home?" I look at my watch and see it is 4:45 p.m. and tell him not to worry about it.   At this point in time I'm having so much fun I'm not worried about anything.  Worse comes to worse we'll taxi out and get a hotel somewhere.  Kev claims he has no money but I figure he can sleep in the parking lot :)  These Leaf fans that were beside us had this face paint on and some cool head gear.  Kev gave them some beer, at this point in time Kev seems to think we have too much beer.  So does the female bartender.  Anyway, these crazy guys with the face paint were from Ottawa - got a picture of them.  We all took up a collection and bought the Leaf fan that had sent us beer a pitcher.  Well that lasted about 15 minutes and he sends another pitcher over!!  Kev absolutely can't believe this. In Peterborough nobody buys anyone a pitcher cause everyone is so damn cheap.  Everyone has to chip in $2.00 it's unbelievable....

I head to the can and when I come back  Scott is chatting it up with a couple of  "SEN HENS" for those of you not sure what I am talking about that is women who are sens fans. [Love the Sen Hens!! :)  ] Anyhow I am half in the bag at this time. [That's putting it mildly] We are pounding [POUNDING!] major beer in a short period of time. I say a few things not sure what Scott will fill you in on details. [Ya....Kevin is just baked.... :)  You can tell by reading this report he's got some mental gaps....]
 
 

Anyway, we were just standing at our spot at the bar.  Amazing that nobody took our spots when one of us went to the washroom.  I think people were afraid cause we were partying so hard.  Now my etiquette at the bar was that if someone was behind me trying to get a drink and wearing Sens paraphernalia I wouldn't let them in (up to the bar to order).  If they were Leaf fans I'd help them to the bar.  This was like a fun war zone.  Anyway, when Kev's not looking or dazed I let two women in that are wearing Sens Jerseys.  I told them I don't usually do this for Sen fans but I'll make an exception in this case (the old Scott charm is in full swing after beer #7 :) ).  Anyway, they get their beers and I continue to talk to them.   So I'm chatting away with them showing them some good old Leaf hospitality when Kevin notices and says "What the hell are you talking to them for?"  He says this right in front of them!!!  I turn around and say "Shut up, they're okay".  Then I turn back around and resume my conversation - these two women are absolutely astonished.  I think they may have thought Kevin and I were going to trade punches over them.  Kev must have been partially loaded at this point as he isn't usually this hostile...not even to Sen fans....actually the entire trip he was kind of anti-social and grumpy......and I was kind of content and rolling with everything.  Usually it is the other way around.  Anyway, since Kevin can't stop me from talking to the "Sen Hens" he gets in on the conversation and is actually rather polite.  The one girl looked totally terrified.....but the other one was laughing.  They had no idea how to handle this situation and I'm sure were wondering how the hell they got in a conversation with the two craziest guys in the bar...and Leaf fans.   Kev cheap shots them "Who are you two going to cheer for next week when the Sens have been eliminated?"  In fact Kev's cheapshotting a lot of people about this  "What are you going to do for a job when the Sens are eliminated?"  he says to the bartender.  Hilarious stuff!  Too bad he can't remember it :)  These two women had seasons tickets but weren't happy cause they were level 300...but Kev and I are impressed....we can't even get "seats" in Toronto.  Eventually the "Sen Hens" (as Kevin has named them, don't e-mail me about it ladies!) leave not sure why, can't remember.   :) At some point in time the guy that is buying us the beer walks over and we chat it up with him and get a picture of the guy standing with me. [I'm sure what happened is Kevin went to the washroom (it seems that every time he went to the washroom I was meeting new people)  and while he was in the washroom the guy who was buying us the beer came over to talk to me.  I told him we had to get a picture of him...he's says he's not photogenic or something...no problem...I'm not going to argue with him, for all I know he's one of America's Most Wanted or something.  Just then Kevin arrives back on the scene.  He walks up and says "Did you get his picture yet?" Keep in mind this is like 10 seconds after he said "No" - but Kev's really whooping it up and friendly because this guy bought us beer so Kev basically snags the guy with his arm and strikes a pose.  Hilarious.

Now the worse part of this whole trip is about to happen for those with weak stomachs I recommened you do not read this part. The bartender asks me if he can see my flag I say so long as you don't do anything to it. It says he won't and proceeds to set it on fire. I freak out and almost climb the counter to get at this guy. [Ya, this happened earlier but Kevin is just getting to it now for some reason.  It happened somewhere around beer #4 or #5 before we started getting free brews.  The bartender was just screwing around...I saw him wink at us.  I was making sure Kevin wouldn't jump over the bar.  But anyway, here's how stupid Sen fans are.  The guy goes to light the flag on fire but it barely burns.... what he should have done or rather what Toronto would do to an Ottawa flag is grab a shot of tequila and chuck it on the flag and then light er up!  I know some of you are saying "That's a major fire violation" - but so is taking the flag and lighting it in the first place.  If you're going to do it you may as well do it right.]  He buys us a picture of beer as if that is to make up for this dirty act. We drink the beer in protest of his actions. [Nice line!  Hell I was drinking the beer cause I like beer.  Don't get me wrong, I don't condone burning the Leaf flag but we're in Ottawa, this guy works at this place, there's nothing we can do about it.  I'll trade his failed attempt at burning the Leaf flag for a pitcher of beer...gladly.  Hey Kev, can you imagine what they'd do in Jersey or Philly?  They'd likely try and pull our shirts off and burn them and not give us a thing in return.  Anyway, it was kinda cool because a few days earlier I told Kevin "When we go to this game, if they give you a Sens flag keep it.  Why?  He asks.  Because I want to bring it home and burn it, is my response.  He thought that was totally inappropriate...but now I bet he agrees with it.] A short time later we head to our seats. [Actually it was a while later....I think most of the stuff that happened in the paragraph above this happened after we got that pitcher of beer.  I think that the pitcher the bartender bought us in lieu of the flag burning was our first pitcher...we had at least two more after that and whenever there wasn't a beer I bought one.  Hard to keep track of just what went on.  Should have brought the cam-corder...that would have been awesome, then we could have had some movies of this online.]

[Another time gap.  Kevin was feeling good at this point.....no doubt....  we have to go back out to the car to get his jacket or something and he has to buy another flag...then we head into the stadium.  Let me tell you though, I had so much fun in this bar it alone was worth the drive up!  A totally different experience from a regular season game.  Lots more interaction between people and a lot of friendly or not so friendly antics....  This was great!  I'm certainly going to look for more playoff tickets as opposed to regular season tickets.  Playoff tickets are a little more expensive but the fans are so nutty it is worth it.]

God this is a long report but I think well worth it. Ok so we head up the stairs to our seats but a long the way we just happen to freak out on Hockey Night In Canada. That is right fellow leafs fanatics I got on HNIC. Scott was off to the side so I am not sure if he got on but I did. [I was too busy taking a photo of the group that got on TV - this was about 15 minutes before game time]  Anybody who taped the pregame show before the start of the game have a look I am there. [He's all excited....don't worry Kev....we'll have your picture on this page for the entire world to see].

We get to our seats and are surrounded by Sen fans, there is the odd Leaf fan but we are in prime Sen territory. [At this point I tell Kev that I'm grabbing a beer and as if  he wants anything, "Water!" he snaps back.  No doubt about it...Kevin is toast!  And that was my last beer..... boy...the first period is kinda hard to remember.] There is a couple beside me they seem like nice enough people but boy was I wrong.

These fans are the rudest people I have ever met not just the two beside me but all of them around us. The chick that sat beside me by the way was stupid. I mean she was FU$%^EN stupid. [I think the guy she was with was her date but they looked a lot a like.... stupid inbred Sen fans.] Then when the Leafs score I forget what goal it was but I jump up and freak out, What am I suppose to do. Anyhow this guy behind me taps me on the shoulder and tells me to settle down. I politely told him to shut the FU*^&&% Up and to FU(*&(*& right off. I don't think he liked that. [If you saw any of the games in Ottawa on TV you'll notice these fans have the long tubes they bang together.  They give you these when you enter the arena - they're like balloons....or oversized condoms....ya great big condoms for a bunch of dicks!   Anyway, I've never been poked and prodded so much in my life by these things.  The guy behind me is a dick.  The people behind you are always pricks because they are higher up and have the confidence that if a fight breaks out they'll take you.   The guy beside me seems okay but he's a Sen fan so he can't be all that good...but at least we chatted about the game.  Until the incident when Cujo came out of his net after a Sen goal, fell and McGeogh, the ref, fell.  Well this guy beside me starts up "That's it, he's (Cujo) gonna get suspended...for sure, he's done!"  Well I lose it!  I turn to this kid (he's not a child...maybe 19 or 21 or something) and just berate him.  "What the fuck are you talking about, are you a total moron?  He obviously fell by mistake."  Then they show it on the big screen and I repeat my tirade.  Now this guy isn't talking to me anymore and the guy behind me wants no part of this Leaf fan.  The only one who bothered me after that little episode was the girl three seats to my left who poked me when the Sens scored and at the end of the game.  But she was a cutie and smiling when she did it so that's okay - Love those Sen Hens! :)  Ya, but the woman Kev had sitting beside him, what a nasty looking Butch she was.  She was no Sen Hen...more like a Sen Pitbull.    Eventually she shut up..... I think...  glad I wasn't sitting beside her...might have had to do something.  I was hoping the fat pig sitting behind Kev would do something stupid so I could nail him... no such luck.]

The chick beside me was just dumb she had no clue about hockey or anything. That is all for me I am typed out. Scott can fill in the blanks I am sure.

[Well Hoglund scored near the end of the game to make it close but we lost.  So we're down.  I wonder what would have happened if we had won?  Perhaps we would have gone down to Marshy's and visit our favourite bartender?  Anyway, we went straight out to the car - massive back log of vehicles trying to leave the lot.  We stood still for about 15 minutes.  That's what Kevin meant re: mistake parking where we did.  I didn't mind, gave me a chance to calm down.

By this time I'm totally sober.  We drank a lot in a short period of time before the game but some food and a tonne of pop along with time allows that to wear off.  It took us about 3 hours to get to Kanata, but only took us 2 and a half hours to get home.  Less traffic, was able to speed a bit more.  We only stopped at Tim Horton's in Perth for some caffeine filled beverages - otherwise it was straight home.  I got to bed at about 2:00 a.m.  Not too shabby.  Kevin was really quiet on the way home, so was I, tired and we lost so that sapped our adrenaline.  Great trip.  Kevin claims it is his last for the year....we shall see if I get more tickets - very difficult to get right now.  I'd gladly go to another game.  I calculated that it would take between 9 and 12 hours to drive to Jersey!  God I love playoff hockey!

I made arrangements with work well before this trip that I wouldn't be in until noon the next day - smart move.  Didn't have a hangover but had trouble speaking due to all the yelling the night before.  Kev told me he missed work the next day because he couldn't talk.

That's the report.  Great trip....game wasn't so great but the trip was awesome.  I'm ready for another one.]