TAPE #4:
Ira Fails His Captain Harry Buys a Hammer
The Cretin Takes a Piss at
the Peabody
SACKBUT:
I got kind of frustrated with that |
BUMPPO:
Now, thats the kind of shit we SACKBUT:
Well, thats why I got so angry Did the Cretin tell you how we figured out |
that he and I must have been at the same hotel, at the same time, like three years before wed ever met?
It was in Omaha, Nebraska, and I was with
And Harry Pendleton, who was that crazy |
they had a whole binful.
And Harry said to the clerk, Well, I want to try these out. Im not going to buy a hammer without trying one out.
And the counter had just brown paper on In the meantime the clerk stood there look- |
ing at us as if to say, What in the fuck is all of this?
And Harry finally got down to where he ESME: How big was the circle? SACKBUT:
We spent a half-hour in that
The next thing we did was to go into a gro- |
Harry stuck one in the inside pocket of his jacket; and we went into a soda shop, and he ordered a malt. And the waitress brought the malt, and Harry said, Aw, come on! I said, To go!
She said, Well, I don t remember your
Then he said, Well, look; Ill tell you what
She said, OK, Ill get you a paper
cup. |
and he poured the rest of the malt into his pocket! ELLA: Did he stick the straw in his pocket? SACKBUT:
Well, one of the things we did
So we took the baby chicks and left a |
about five or six minutes later, the phone rang at the desk, and the clerk picked it up and said, Chickens?!
So I told this story to the Cretin one time,
It was the Rome Hotel the Rome Hotel in ELLA:
The Peabody Hotel, in Memphis, had |
BUMPPO:
Is that the fountain that the Cretin pissed in? ELLA:
No, he didnt piss in the fountain.
It BUMPPO: At the Peabody. ELLA:
At the Peabody, at about 6 or 7 in |
The Cretin |
TAPE #19: The Akron Mob
CRETIN:
Something I heard on the radio
Bands are great for laundering money; |
pattern for a long time.
Its great; its a play-
Like when we did the Italian Boys Town |
These were benefits, and Sergio would do several of them a year. Hed pay us, normal- ly, out of his pocket, and hed go sing for free, and theyd get a bunch of bread.
Theyd do it in a place where, where those BUMPPO: No. CRETIN: Its unbelievable. One of their |
mothers made it.
We were in this big, ramb- ling house, and there were all these Italian guys and gals, middle-aged; and the wives were do- ing all the wife stuff, and all these guys were mobsters, and their kids, you know? And our conductor, Wayne, was always asking about their guns, he wanted to know whether you could carry a gun in that town; hed engage these guys in that conversation. And hed show them his piece, and theyd say no, you couldnt have a gun in this town, couldnt get a permit. The only people who could, they said, were law enforcement, sheriffs deputies.
Whos that? hed say.
Theyd say, |
deputy sheriff; were deputy sheriffs.
We had to split.
We were eating at one of |
had fixed something and they were bringing it.
And we were going to miss the fucking
So we finally got out of there, and there |
And we didnt get stopped.
Its truly Dark Ages shit, man.
And theyre |
their families.
They just dont understand the double standard involved.
Akron.
One of those secondary Ohio |
Over hamburgers sold!