10 Ways to Tell if You’re a Wizard!
I)
You are
resting in the woods before your next hunt. What are you doing?
a)
Napping,
people are going to come beg you to hunt with them in a minute or two.
b)
Throwing
smoke bombs at people because you don’t need anyone to hunt with you.
c)
Walking
around poking people in the bum with your Magus Kronos since you never got to
hunt in the first place.
II)
You’ve
just reached a new level of understanding and insight into the world.
What new secret is now apparent in front of your eyes?
a)
The
talent of how to strike with your blade just so that the wind force is pushed
out into a wave striking your opponent from afar and gaining an easy victory
over a monster.
b)
The final
solution to negotiate a compromise between the mundanes and the Grimlocks for
trade though Pravat Caves.
c)
The
reason why your clothes are so nice. You
have to have something to live for after all.
III)
You have
greatly pleased the gods. They
offer you one wish for the betterment of Temuair. What do you wish?
a)
You wish
for a great magical sword so that you might take control of all the corners of
Temuair and unite it under your rule.
b)
You wish
for peace and freedom from the evil tyranny of King Bruce and free rule of all
Aislings and mundanes.
c)
You wish
for a new staff that would allow you to shoot pretty flashy things and impress
Aislings at the next Mileth Fair.
IV)
Today is
your first day as Burgess of your wonderful city. What new law do you pass?
a)
You pass
a law putting bans on begging to teach young Aislings to earn their own way.
That and your tired of people asking you to remove their scars.
b)
You pass
a law saying begging isn’t really that bad. That is how you got to office anyhow.
c)
You could
care less about begging. You pass a law to keep all the peasants from lifting
your robes up with their sticks to see if you’re wearing pants or not.
V)
A vicious
looking draco comes charging at you teeth barred, what do you do?
a)
You stand
your ground pulling forth your mighty blade and slashing at the draco so foolish
to challenge you.
b)
You run
behind the warrior cowering for fear of having your legs bitten off and attempt
a spell to help your blade-swinging friend into battle.
c)
You do
your best impersonation of a rock and hope that the draco just won’t notice.
VI)
As the
sun dawns of the Kasmain Mountains what are you doing to prepare for your day?
a)
You
sharpen your blades and don your armor as the rays of sun shine off your
beautiful steel plate making you shimmer to rival the dawn.
b)
Your
crawling out the back door of a crowded tavern and returning home with a new
purse the enterprise of the dark hours ended for now and tis time for you to
rest.
c)
You
don’t do anything until about high noon when you roll out of bed demanding
your morning cup of Kavara ((reference to a lore I wrote, to keep things easy
just say Coffee)) and griping about why the sun doesn’t wait for old sages.
VII)
Vile
criminal!! You have committed a crime against the city of your birth.
What was your wrongdoing?
a)
Thou vile
summoner have brought forth daemons to wreak havoc upon our good city.
To the Sgath pit with yee!
b)
Dark
heretic, your own voice condemns yee. Speak
of these other words to Sgrios and see if he has an ear for your kind.
c)
Oh evil
one, you have been tried and found guilty of the despicable crime of loitering
within the city walls and complaining. Enjoy the darkness of the pit!
VIII)
You have
just painted your greatest work in art. What
beautiful painting do the other Aislings look upon?
a)
A
grotesque depiction of a battle smeared with blood and smoke.
b)
A perfect
life like depiction of the great heroes standing around in the east woods being
bored and swinging swords at each other.
c)
Well…it
would have been nice till you tripped and it fell into the mud….We wizards
call it modern art.
IX)
Ah, the
Mileth Fair, What are you looking forward to most about the fair this Deoch?
a)
Sumo
wresting!! Big men and women, in
their undergarments, throwing each other around in the dirt.
What else could possibly inspire the Aisling soul?
b)
The songs
of the great artists. Listen to the
melodious voice of Keegan the bard and apple grower.
c)
Fair what
fair??? Humm, never heard of a
fair…No one tells us anything! Where
is my Kavara!
X)
Your
greatest writing has been approved by the gods!! They love it! What
is the title and subject of your work??
a)
“Big
Burly and Black”, a sword slinger’s views on tiny pieces of Dubhinad.
b)
“How to
Hail Heaven” ((or “Kalling Kaldath Kollect” but that looks funny)),
exactly what to say to your deity for the most favorable results.
c)
“Weird
Whys of Wizardy”, a long
introspective writing about nothing in particular, but still giving a feeling of
being a wizard to the reader. ((I
hope))
And here’s how wizardly you really are.
Add up your points and look at the scale.
Each A) is worth 1 point, B) 2 points, and C) 3
points.
10-15 You sword swinging hero! You’ve been wearing
armor behind our backs!
16-20 Your getting waning toward the wizard’s star
21-25 Grab your Kronos and get in a robe and they
might mistake you for a priest
26-30 Ahhh, grab your Kavara and join the arcane
circle brother of the elements
Well I hope ye enjoyed my writings on nothing in particular. Maybe now is where I tell you there is
nothing in particular to being a wizard. It is a state of mind achieved only by relaxation, a
willingness to take life as it comes, and a good sense of humor.
May Nadur guide your path good people, mundane and Aisling alike. Good night and good marrow for I'’
hard to get rid of. Overall good day fellow wizards at heart.