One Rating
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One-half Rating
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One-half Rating
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Unnecessarily
Graphic or
Violent

One-half Rating
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Immoral Lifestyling,
Gratuitous Sexual
Content or Profanity

As a bonus, there is a solid, easy to follow, interesting plot... even though it is a clear rip-off of numerous other carbon copies before it. The cast seems to have established a natural rapport that makes everything come alive in a very much more meaningful, clever, outlandish, and gratifying way; i.e. huge new flavor: same low price!

You know the basic idea: Boy and girl grow up next door to each other, and share everything. They know each other so well they almost finish each other's sentences. They adore each other and mistake their closeness for just a sibling relationship.

Then, comes the call of puberty. Their adolescent dream mates begin unfolding in their heads as some exotic, esoteric, stupefyingly different and exciting person. One or the other is afraid to test the waters and the other finds an unexpected angle that helps them in their quest. It usually involves a plot to help the other find their dream mate.

But, long after things have already gone too far, the plotter discovers that they REALLY love their childhood friend. The other one has more intuitively felt the same way, but was too self-doubting to express it. Suddenly, the cobwebs fall from their eyes and they find themselves madly in love with each other.

Along the way, a bunch of crazy, difficult, embarrassing, hurtful, FUNNY stuff happens. You can predict each one of them, but you don't care that it's a well worn formula because this is a uniquely creative, entertaining, and FUNNY variation with enthusiastic, spontaneous, insanely entertaining performances by a WHOLE cast of idiots!

All of this comes at a price, however. You must suffer dissertation involving a four foot plastic male member and safety shield, scattered peltings of infantile profanity, a triple dip of male bootie, plus highly suggestive situation comedy and clothing.

If you go, realize that -- as adults -- you probably won't be hugely offended if you like incredibly well done adolescent humor. But, ironically, such humor is inappropriate for ADOLESCENTS.

Samantha can't keep her eyes off of Kelley and discovers a soul mate in their mutual love of poetry. Jasper's left hanging as Sam wanders through unresolved desire versus loyalty. The story twists at this point and romance wins. There are some cuss words, fight scenes and a couple kissing in bed - we're left to figure the rest out as the next shot shows them still on the bed in the morning light.

I disliked the drawn out scenes of sunlight through the trees and gradual panning of beautiful scenery laced with emotion charged music - all to bring forth tears from the audience - hmm.

Dark Diaper enjoyed this movie much more than I. It's OK, but not on my "You gotta go see this" list.

Dean Corso is a book sleuth, well regarded in the dim alcoves of the world's grand book collectors, legal and otherwise. He views no assignment too challenging as long as the money's good.

Then a very private, notorious, and sinister collector -- Boris Balkan (Frank Langella) -- summons his talents for a highly unusual and personally scintillating commission that sparks his imagination more than ever before. The money is also greener than ever before.

He is given brief access to an elaborate and highly inaccessible library, and is shown one of the rarest books in the world. It has just been acquired by his patron at considerable cost, actually mere days before the previous owner committed suicide. Upon examining it, he is told that its inspiration is a book that no longer exists, one written by Lucifer himself.

His task is described in simple terms. He is to travel to and examine each of the other two examples of the book still extant; and, in doing so, is to prove the illegitimacy of the others. As each of the three copies has previously been regarded to be authentic, this challenge could seem quite heretical among rare book owners but that is of no consequence to Balkan who seems certain that he alone has the only remaining legitimate copy.

To a sleuth of his caliber, this seems to Corso a rather simple assignment with little downside and lots of intrigue and financial reward. He is easily persuaded and flies off to Europe for the first book examination.

What he quickly discovers, however, is that it turns out to be a quite a treacherous and inimical gauntlet laced with death... though not his own, not yet, but maybe.

His death comes later when a big, gossamer pterodactyl-like visage swoops onto him and coalesces into a hideous cannibalistic beast that rips out his heart and drinks him white. Actually, that's MY preferred ending. The real one is more perplexing and anticlimactic. Mine is quite better.

Anyway, as with all evil movies, there are the obligatory bare-naked sex acts, other nude scenes, and episodes of vile language and demonic acts.

The much maligned Johnny Depp looks really sharp as Corso and does an incredibly good job of sustaining an ever so delicately building tension that artfully rivets you on the unfolding drama. He is the central figure of the movie and all action centers and builds around his character. Strong character actors do an equally admirable job of fleshing out the periphery (no pun intended.)

The movie waits until the last seven minutes to utterly fall on its face with an ending that transgresses the story's central promise. Maybe that's an unintended blessing. We get to feel the betrayal that sin always brings, but in the safety of a fictional setting.... a simulation, you might say.

Obviously, this is NOT a movie for sub-adults, and its appropriateness beyond that is a question only for those without a good moral compass. Depp was GREAT, as was most of the central story development; but, given advanced notice, I would have treated Vixen to an ice cream cone instead.

With this resume, it might seem surprising that this story is essentially very uplifting (no pun intended) and inspiring... cross my heart. True, there some paradoxes here. A heroic mom who dresses like a tart. A mom who cusses out her young boy for cussing.

An ill-prepared, though intelligent, mom running to grasp the hem of life's coattails, she has a calamitous fender-bender a block from home and winds up in court with a snaky, mean doctor opposing her and lying about his culpability. When tact, money, and social position win out, Erin is left with another loss in life to add to her growing collection (not to mention joblessness and $17,000 in debts.)

What to DO? Hmmmmm. On the same day she looses in court, her dependable, next-door babysitter announces that she is going to move away and live with her children. THEN, bikers move in NEXT DOOR and, when she tells them not to rev up their bikes at bedtime, one of them, George (beautifully portrayed by Aaron Eckhart,) HITS ON HER with the ardor of a modern day Romeo. He is struck with Cupid's arrow from the start.

Meanwhile, having been married and having spent all of her time at maternal pursuits, Erin has no resume. So, job hunting is rather bleak. Babysitter finding is even MORE bleak. Then, through a providential turn of events, the biker gets to try-out as a stay-at-home mom for Erin's kids one afternoon... and likes it. She doesn't want HIM to baby-sit for her, but can't really afford any other option.

Finally, the can-opener of desperation opens a portal to inspiration, infusing her with the raw, reckless courage to inveigle her former lawyer, Ed Masry (played warmly and entertainingly by Albert Finney) into giving her a job, because he "lost" her case and she didn't get anything. He relents and gives her a job -- minimum pay with NO benefits -- and she becomes the step-child Cinderella of the clerical team.

Then comes the magic! One day, while being routinely snubbed at lunch by the REAL office girls, Masry gives her the booby prize for being at her desk... a bunch of stuff from a pro-bono case that she gets to put in order. But this bono has some gristle in it and when she tries to unravel the snarls things get EXCITING!

She has stumbled into the defining challenge of her life and her super-human persistence and singular devotion to the cause of HUNDREDS of terribly wronged individuals propels not only herself and family, but Masry and his law firm into the stratosphere of success, stature, and prosperity through the biggest victory in a direct-action lawsuit in history.

I should add that Peter Coyote was spellbinding as cooperating attorney Curt Potter.

Though we do not applaud the liberties taken with profanity, Vixen and I had to put that aside in order to appreciate the positive message of the main story line. This is a cautionary to everyone, however. Profanity under any guise is not acceptable. The idea could have been conveyed without polluting the air for movie goers. It is also reprehensible that a young actor should be made an accomplice in such behavior in the crass pursuit of a buck. There is no nudity, but a pair of quivering melons were almost always stealing the camera's eye and a bedroom scene between unmarried adults in a home inhabited by three young children is not a good role model for any movie goer, even though it was deftly handled.

If you decide to go see this movie, you've been warned. Be sure to leave teens and lesser beings at home.

It's warmly sentimental and sweet, not saccharine. Set against the backdrop of World War Two, it's a gently beautiful story of small times in a small town, the rough-and-tumble of being a kid, and the profoundly ripening effect of a smart and devoted dog, Skip, on Willy, a smothered and retiring young boy (played instinctively by Frankie Muniz, star of Malcolm in the Middle.) It's a biography painted by Norman Rockwell informed by the quirks, blemishes, and warts of an era long gone; and redolent with a continual undercurrent of wonderfully innocent humor, reminiscent of those old Hal Roach movies from the twenties and thirties (The Little Rascals, etc.)

Skip is played with relish and elan by that rascally dog who plays Eddy on Frasier. Most dogs would muff an Oscar speech.... most dogs EXCEPT THIS ONE. He should get one. Other solid performances come from Kevin Bacon as Willy's dad, Diane Lane as Willy's resourceful mom, and Luke Wilson who NAILS the role of Dink Jenkins (high school athletic luminary who arcs into a social abyss after returning from the war with chicken feathers and a long-term stubble.)

Also... talk about nailing a role! Caitlin Wachs... COME ON DOWN! This little pistol is a dramatically aware and stunningly lovely kid who turns in a stellar performance as Rivers Applewhite. I have never seen a more convincing portrayal of the girl we all drooled over in grade school. And, how about that great trio of neighborhood ruffians? Especially Bradley Coryell who plays that big, bad bully to the bone! Also, Harry Connick, Jr. must be one of the more versatile guys around: singer, musician, actor, and -- in this movie -- narrator: Excellent in each.

My Dog Skip is a refreshingly honest and unapologetic portrayal of the societal biases and norms of the time. It was the way people lived. Racism and sexism weren't strident and divisive ideologies: they were customary, each a thread in the cloth of everyday life. And, were likewise portrayed in this movie... without rancor, remark, or objection. It was a time of great paradoxes. It was, also, an atmosphere more hardy and spontaneous, less cluttered, more thick-skinned and blunt; yet, more mannerly than today.

There are lessons and laughs for everyone in this jewel... even moments of reluctant kindness, as when the childhood bully is slowly revealed to be less a violent tormentor than simply a rugged kid disgusted by the neighborhood weakling he derisively calls a "titty boy." He ultimately fatigues of tormenting Willy and opens a small, but significant, door of opportunity for him that helps him outgrow his painful awkwardness and isolation.

Another keystone event is the wonderfully innocent friendship and affection that blossoms between Willy and Rivers, the prettiest and most popular little girl in school.

But, none of these miraculous transformations  would have ever occurred without Skip's wily and dedicated machinations. This is truly a story celibrating the undying love of an untiringly lovely animal. It's funny and clever and endearing. Go see it. Everyone will connect with this. It's even O.K. for postal workers, the terminally tearful, and carefully monitored asylum patients.

Now, if I can just find a Jack Russell terrier who loves and adores me for who I am........

Imagine dramatic overtone that goes nowhere. Imagine four reliably consummate comic talents managing to cast off enough of the maudlin to retain some bittersweet aftertaste and hold the viewers' interest to the desperate end.... and you have this movie; a triumph of talent over content.

This was a paramount example of parasitic humor. And the movie stoops EVEN LOWER, dragging spare sinews of humor from such shock elements as strong expletives and a tasteless bedroom liaison between the world's oldest father (Matthau) and his equally over-ripe girlfriend.

The central theme of this is not comedic at all. It deals with the inability, each in their own inimical way, of three sisters to accept and deal with their father's deterioration and imminent death, hastened by the stark indifference of his wife, their mother (flawlessly captured in its cold essence by Cloris Leachman.)

Diane Keaton plays the hyper-driven successaholic oldest sister to a T. And Lisa Kudrow is perfect as herself, which doubles a satisfactory rendition of the flaky youngest sister, a floundering soap opera actress.

There is no nudity, but virtually every scene involving Meg Ryan (the middle sister, Eve) is a running update on the current status of nipple erection and their current loci beneath her blouse. Like Kudrow, Meg Ryan is Meg Ryan; which is the essential ingredient for the character of Eve.

Whether or not you go is your call, but you've been adequately warned. Obviously, this is not the movie for manic depressants or kiddies. God is requested many times, though not in the religious sense, and the "F" word makes numerous appearances.

I like all of the stars in this film, but this is just not a good entertainment vehicle unless you're so up and over the top that you need a sappy downer just to level your trajectory. If so, by all means, TAKE YOUR MEDICINE!   TOP

This story felt more like a live theatre performance than a movie - you know you're watching it all play out but the liberal premises are so absurd and unsubtle that you just watch to see how it all unravels - not because you could possibly care for these immoral, selfish people.

Major themes include adultery, transvestite and homosexual relationships, theft, in short a great many self absorbed characters - none of which I would EVER want to know. The acting was good, but who cares when the picture's plot and lack of aim are so pointless! Get the lint out of your belly button, you'll have more fun. TOP 

But, I'll bet you weren't a burned-out British foreign service cutout ravaged by guilt and grief over losing your family because of neglect, haunted by an impish, omnipresent, imaginary daughter-cum-super-parent, and spying (via an audio/visually augmented sniper rifle) on a manic serial killer/love temptress while nursing a growing desire to be her guardian angel and quickly becoming obsessed with her. This is a complex, non-traditional love story.

Along the way, our fatal "ingenue," Joanna (a deft blend by Ashley Judd of steely resilience and sociopathic ambiguity,) supports herself by grazing on a random series of unsuspecting victims.

Here you have dialog littered with insalubrious verbal shrapnel, gruesome random murders, intense moments of deviant sexual content and suggestion, emotional dysfunction, and the ever-present pall of mental abuse. The mood is continually either psychotic, dreary, or dreary AND psychotic.

Of course, every serious modern screen work MUST incorporate SOME reminder of homosexuality. Here, we have an authoritarian family services Nazi (played with a razor's edge by Genevieve Bujold) who plops down in front of her large, contemporary oil of a nude lesbian couple brazenly peering over her shoulder through nearly ALL of an interview scene.

Then, there is the tireless polishing of the name "Hillary." Media mavens keep trotting it out. I'm surprised that there hasn't been a miniseries set in some squalid Washington slum watched over by a saintly, self-sacrificing Mother Hillary. In THIS movie, the handle is used by real-life lesbian K.D. Lang; but, then, that's probably apropos given today's social "relevances." (I just wonder if Ethel Mertz was given HER first name because of the Rosenbergs? It's a thought.)

When it was all over, I overheard two guys in the bathroom. One was saying "I feel guilty because I picked the movie." (Nearly half the audience reacted with derisive laughter as it ended with what should have been a poignant moment. I suspect the laughter was also a sign of relief.)

There is something to like and dislike in this film. The subject is disturbing but the suspense and uncertainty build masterfully like a runaway train ride, SUCKING YOU DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO ITS BOWL-LAPPING SWIRL. It's a strong action/suspense. It's intriguing and grabs your imagination, but it's an unwholesome story.

The screenplay is as taut and gripping as a panic attack, but I'd rather be flogged with a bag of medical waste than see it again. Adults Only please. TOP 

The creep runs to the police and makes a false claim, young Carter is nabbed, and the race game turns everything into a hellish inquisition for the small, stuttering boy that is most vividly captured in one callous sentence uttered by the detective who becomes his life-long nemesis: "He's just a nigger with a knife."

The eleven year old Carter is railroaded into a juvenile detention facility for ten years! Before his term is up, Carter escapes and enters the Army, becoming a paratrooper and an inner-service prize fighter, a pressure valve for his growing sense of injustice and resentment.

From the first injustice to the last, this saga spans over 35 years of his life, during which he is relentlessly hounded by obsessed police detective Della Pesca, whose unrelenting resentment and vindictiveness eventually drive the detective to perpetrate the ultimate outrage by framing Carter for three murders he didn't commit.

Carter's ensuing struggles to maintain his dignity, his sanity, his reputation, and ultimately his survival are heroic; as is the epic and eventually successful struggle of a group of Canadians and a young black man working to free him.

This is a marvelously splendid and rich story made all the more majestic and extraordinary by the way that Carter is shown to have turned every adversity into an ally and a growth step. Through shear will and faith in God, he becomes a self-made scholar and a powerful emotional and physical presence.

His story explodes before your eyes with the power of TWO TURBO-CHARGED FISTS! It captivates your senses and your heart. You cheer for each success and I challenge anyone not to shed at least one tear as they watch this... a tear of sorrow, a tear of joy.

Denzel Washington (as Carter) turns in the best performance of his career! This can be said, equally, of Dan Hedaya who makes the incredible viciousness of Detective Della Pesca palpable and utterly sinister.

Likewise, Vicellous Reon Shannon is powerful and heart-wrenchingly touching as the idolizing young black man, Lesra Martin, whose devotion and determination inspired and underpinned the successful effort to free Hurricane Carter.

Especially poignant is the parallel drawn by Carter between his relationship with Martin and that of two biblical characters, Reuben and Lazarus, in which Carter shows his deep trust in and gratitude for God's indisputable care.

* This is tough, adult material with contextually tough language, as you might well expect. Treat it that way and leave teens and lesser beings at home. Those conditions met, this is a rich gem of a movie and definitely one with valuable life lessons. TOP 

The movie locations were skillfully chosen for their often mystical and haunting appeal and superb camera work took full advantage of them. They drew your imagination into every scene, as did the splendid action shots which captured your brains and wouldn't let them go until they felt the full thunder of hooves and the hard breath of horseys as their riders came together in bloody combat.

The polite and lyrical speech that was so typical of period correspondence flavors the film's dialog and gives it a rich broth of authenticity, as well as reminding us that there was a time in history when, even during tough conflict and suffering, good people didn't abandon civilized speech and manners. A terrifically good object lesson.

* There is also no nudity, though a breast-feeding scene almost trips the alarm buzzer and gives flight to vivid imaginings. Singer Jewel (Kilcher) plays Sue Lee Shelley in that interlude depicting one of motherhood's defining chores. Just a brief glimpse demonstrated her instinctive grasp of impressive resources in the portrayal. I think I finished my fruit punch at that point.

Speaking of Jewel, the Diaper Worldwide Transceiver uncovered key intelligence pinpointing other fundamental assets that confirm her as the perfect casting choice. According to unnamed sources, she grew up on a large primitive farm in rural Alaska that didn't even have any "indoor plumbing" or electricity! AND, she is also instinctively comfortable with horseys. How do you beat them credentials? They give her gut-level (and nose-level) insight into the historic privations of the story era.

She comes across clean of any dramatic baggage... just wholesome and completely natural in the setting. It's powerful and convincing.

This movie focuses on a rather obscure chapter in "The War Between the States," as it is called by well adjusted people. There was quite a bit of fussin' and shootin' ... and SCALPIN' goin' on at the border betwixt largely Confederate Missouri and the free state of Kansas. Sentiments ran high and kinfolk were divided amongst themselves and against their neighbors. They all fell into either the secesh or evil unionist camps.

Satanic regular troops from the Union Army and unionist neighbors were bedeviling secesh folks with death and mayhem. They were trying to hurt their feelings for wanting to just own some negroes and be left alone. Sniffle.

Two life-long friends, Jack Bull and Jake Roedel, find themselves in common sentiment with others outraged by the murderous Union incursions. Jake (played memorably by Tobey Maguire) was virtually raised with Jack (Skeet Ulrich.) Together, they join a loose band of freelancing insurgents that ultimately throws in with the infamous William Clarke Quantrill (formerly a school teacher) and his forces for a raid on citizens and two squads of black Federal troops in Lawrence, Kansas. Historians will recall that several of his legendary sidekicks were Cole Younger and brothers James, John, and Bob; and Jesse James and his brother Frank.

The movie's central figures are Jake, Sue Lee, and manumitted slave Daniel Holt (played by Jeffrey Wright.) Though this is a work of fiction, it opens the viewer to a rich taste of life in those times -- replete with warts and contradictions -- and this is, indeed, its great value and its most entertaining aspect.

For the first time, for instance, many will gain a bare hint that there were surprising numbers of blacks who chose to fight for the Confederacy, and with great courage and passion. Their reasons were often convoluted, as in the case of Holt. Some were actually regular uniformed soldiers in their state units, fighting alongside whites. (Several eye-opening books on this are: "Black Southerners in Gray" and "Black Confederates and Afro-Yankees in Civil War Virginia.")

You'll follow the lives of these three characters through a sweeping panorama of physical and emotional experiences, compressed and altered by the uncertainties and exigencies of war. You WILL come away richer for having gone.

Wimpies and young'uns may find the level of war killins' dangerous to their delicate constitutions; but, there is little else to offend and much to fertilize one's sensitive brain cells.

Genteel speech and manners, and the absence of nudity make this movie very satisfying to watch. It is a humorous, intelligent, at times contextually violent, and very engrossing look at another era. There ARE a couple of subtle insinuations of an adult nature but nothing that would unfurl flags of caution or moisten the brow.

Most adults will enjoy the period accuracy of this movie and the intriguing saga of its main characters. Mature teens might also join you, but leave unstable postal workers, low wavelengthers, and the maturity challenged at home.

The ending is a bit "oops it's over," but that's a minor complaint. The Dynamic Diaper Duo liked it a lot anyway. TOP