
     Jim lay curled around Blair, the smaller body tucked perfectly
in the curve of his own larger frame.  Neither of them had made any
moves to make love, but had spooned together, naked, needing the
closeness more than the activity.  Still, Blair seemed unnaturally silent,
considering he was still awake.  

     "Still awake, sweetheart?"  Jim asked, more as a conversation
starter than a question.  Blair would know Jim knew whether he was
awake or asleep.  Just like Santa Claus...//he knows when you are
sleeping, he knows when you're awake...maybe Santa was a Sentinel
too...//  Shaking his head to dispel the stupid thoughts that could only
visit a nearly-sleeping brain, he concentrated on running his hand
lightly over Blair's chest and belly.  

     "Can't seem to relax," Blair said honestly.

     "Everything's going to be all right, baby.  I promise."  Jim
kissed Blair's shoulder and squeezed him a little.

     "I'm scared," Blair admitted softly.

     "I know.  I am too."

     "Not of Alex," Blair added, then, after a prolonged silence,  "Of
what she wants to take away from me."

     "What she wants and what she's going to get are two different
things, Chief."  Jim sighed.  "She isn't going to win this, Blair.  She isn't
going to split us up."

     "Don't let it happen.  Please, Jim.  Don't leave me," Blair
concluded in a whisper.  "I swore I'd never beg anybody not to leave if
that's what they wanted, but I--"

     "Blair, you don't have to beg for anything.  Sweetheart, I made a
mistake--a stupid, hormone-driven, instinct-driven *blunder*.  It won't
happen again."

     "This is going to sound stupid."  Blair let out a long breath.  "I
wanted your hormones and your instincts as well as your love.  It's just
hard knowing that...that she's the one you want and I'm the one you're
committed to."

     "I thought we settled all this."

     "I thought so too, but sometimes, at night, when it's quiet, and I
lie here and think about things...I think about what happened...I'm
just...I'm just scared."

     "How could you still think I wanted Alex--after this
afternoon...how could you think I want anybody besides you?"

     "I never thought you could want anybody else after..."  Blair sat
up and swung his legs over the side of the bed, resting his elbows on
his knees and dropping his head into his hands.  "God, I hate myself."

     "What...why?"  Jim demanded, sitting up now.

     "I sound like the pathetic ugly housewife in one of those cheesy
bodice-ripper romance novels who throws herself at her husband's feet
to stop him from pursuing the busty wench he really wants."

     "The 'busty wench'?"  Jim repeated, trying unsuccessfully to
stifle a chuckle.

     "Don't laugh at me, Jim," Blair warned, his voice sounding
reasonably foreboding.  Like all people who are ordered not to laugh,
Jim burst out into full blown, snorting, bed-shaking laughter.  "I'm glad
my angst is so fucking amusing," Blair snapped, getting up out of bed. 
He looked back at Jim, who was helplessly trying to stifle the tendency
to laugh.  Blair didn't want the corner of his mouth to twitch, and he
didn't want to give in to the ripple of laughter that pressed up from
inside, but it happened, and before he knew it, he was laughing right
along with Jim.  

     "Sort of kills her mystique, doesn't it?"  Jim managed, still
laughing.  "I guess she *is* a busty wench, isn't she?"

     "Shut up," Blair warned, laughing too hard to make it sound
ominous.  He picked up a pillow and swatted Jim in the face with it.

     "I suppose you think you can start physically abusing me now,
huh?"  Jim challenged, picking up his own pillow and belting Blair a
good one in the face with it.  

     "Paybacks are hell, man.  You owe me."  Blair leveled another
blow with his pillow, back on the bed on his knees now.  

     "I'm warning you, Chief," Jim shot back, swatting Blair again
with the pillow.  

     "I'll tell my dad you're hitting me."  Blair slugged Jim with the
pillow as he said the words.  

     "We can't have that."  Jim grabbed Blair around the waist and
threw him back on the bed, pouncing on him with dancing fingers that
tormented him with ruthless tickling.  

********

     "What's that?"  Starsky was up on one elbow now, and Hutch let
out a long yawn, then opened one eye.

     "I hear some creaking and laughing.  What do you think it is,
Einstein?  Shut up and go back to sleep."  Hutch yawned again and
rolled over, his back to his restless partner.  

     "All'a that creaking and laughing.  I bet they're havin' a good
time down there," Starsky opined, then curled his lip when he could see
his sultry tone was having no effect on his partner.  "C'mon, blondie--"

     "My dick's asleep.  You should be too," Hutch retorted.  

     "Guess we'll haveta wake him up then," Starsky teased,
reaching around Hutch but being intercepted by one large hand.  His
hand was kissed, and his arm placed around Hutch's body, encouraging
him to spoon up behind his lover.  "Back botherin' you, babe?"  Starsky
nuzzled the soft blond hair.

     "Yeah, I'm a little stiff--and not in the right spot."

     "Right here?"  Starsky unerringly found the trouble spot and
started massaging it gently but firmly.

     "Oh yeah, that's it."  Hutch let out a long breath and relaxed as
the tense muscles were rubbed until they relaxed a bit.  

     "You want somethin' for the pain?"  Starsky asked.

     "I got that already," Hutch said, grinning over his shoulder. 
"Thanks, lover."  He reached behind him and patted Starsky's cheek,
which earned him a kiss to the palm of his hand.  

     "Relax and go back t'sleep, darlin'.  Sorry I woke you up."

     "We better get those two safety harnesses of some sort.  One of
'em's going to bounce off the bed right out the window and into the
ocean if they keep that up."

     "Ah, youth," Starsky said, chuckling.  

********

     Jim stirred and woke up, smiling at the sight next to him.  Blair
was on his stomach, naked as the day he was born, hair all over the
place, one arm and one leg hooked over Jim, the rest of him sprawled
out all over the bed.  For a guy with short legs, he sure had a knack of
having limbs everywhere on a mattress.  

     The night had ended with the wild pillow fight, a little kissing,
and finally, sleep.  The levity was something they both needed badly,
but Jim didn't delude himself that it had solved anything.  Blair's fears
and insecurities about Alex were very real, and very serious.  

     Jim lifted a few soft curls off Blair's face, and took in the
perfection of the sleeping profile.  Blair was paler and thinner than
usual, but he was still beautiful, maybe more beautiful for having
survived what he did, for having returned to life as the result of a
miracle Jim still didn't completely understand.  How could Blair
seriously believe that any mating urge could lure him away from this?

     //Because it already did once before,// his subconscious
supplied helpfully.  

     Moved by memories of the rare glimpse of Blair's insecurities
the night before, Jim pulled the sleeping body into his arms and held
him close, smiling as even in sleep, Blair mumbled something that
sounded like his name and curled around him eagerly, clinging tightly. 
He closed his eyes again and relaxed, with Blair warm and heavy
against him, the beloved heart beating its usual sleeping rhythm against
his.  Alex Barnes wanted to rob him of this, wanted to rip the other half
of his soul right out of his arms...given the opportunity, she would end
Blair's life--nearly had once already.  

     In that pre-dawn moment of realization, the horror of what Alex
Barnes had done, had made him do, and would bend every effort to do
again, obliterated any lingering tendril of desire or unity he'd felt for
her.  When she resurfaced this time, she would find a very changed Jim
Ellison as part of the welcoming committee.

********

     Hutch shifted and rolled over in bed, immediately missing the
warm body that had been cuddled against him when he fell asleep.  He
focused bleary eyes on the alarm clock, and then focused on the music
playing softly.  Starsky had set the alarm to wake him with music, and
he'd put a cassette in the player of the little radio-tape player-alarm
clock.  He was listening to the strains of The Carpenters singing "Close
To You".  Smiling and shaking his head, he pulled himself up into a
sitting position just as Starsky appeared in the doorway carrying a
breakfast tray, shutting the door quietly with his foot.

     "Mornin', blondie."  He set the tray in front of Hutch and then
carefully sat on his side of the bed, easing over until their shoulders
touched so they could share the stash of fruit, cereal, juice and coffee.  

     "Nice way to wake up, babe," Hutch said, smiling at his partner,
who started singing along with the part of that had prompted him to tell
Hutch once that it should've been written for him:

//On the day that you were born
The angels got together
And decided to create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moondust in your hair of gold
And starlight in your eyes of blue

That is why all the girls in town
Follow you all around
Just like me they long to be
Close to you...//

     Starsky wasn't really even looking at him then, just singing
along with the song, helping himself to one of the two dishes of cereal
on the tray.  Hutch found himself staring at the other man, memorizing
his face, seeing it twenty years younger, and imagining it twenty years
older, and wondering if it was possible he ever loved Starsky more than
he did now, or if he could ever grow to love him more in the future.  It
didn't seem possible.  

     Meanwhile, both The Carpenters and Starsky had moved on to
another song on the tape, and it took until then for Starsky to pick up
on the scrutiny he was getting.  He turned to look at Hutch then, and
smiled one of those big smiles that always reduced Hutch to putty in
his hands.  

     "I love you, Starsk," Hutch said, his voice unusually serious.  It
wasn't that they didn't say it, and say it often, even.  But something in
Hutch's tone let Starsky know this meant more somehow.  

     "I love you too, darlin'.  With all my heart."  Starsky held up his
juice glass, and they toasted.  

********

     "I need a favor," Jim asked Hutch as the older man poured a cup
of coffee from the pot he'd made once he and Starsky had joined their
guests in the kitchen.  Blair and his father were laughing and arguing
vocally about some bizarre fact that Starsky had found in some obscure
book on bizarre cultural traditions, neither of them noticing what their
quieter partners were talking about.

     "What?"  Hutch asked, handing Jim a cup of the coffee and then
pouring another for himself.

     "I need to get out of here for a couple hours.  I don't have
anything for Blair's birthday," Jim said, referring to the occasion which
was upon them that day.

     "Starsk already put me on duty today keeping Blair busy, so the
base is covered."

     "Don't you think he's going to find that a bit suspicious?"  Jim
whispered.

     "What if he does?  Anticipation is half the fun, right?"  Hutch
asked, smiling as he took a sip of his coffee.

     "Probably."  Jim was quiet a moment.  "He really loves that
laptop.  That was nice," he said, nodding a little.

     "He needed one, and I know the kid's pretty low on money. 
Besides, he was practically drooling on the display model," Hutch
recalled, chuckling a little.  "Anything that makes anybody that happy
is a worthwhile investment."

********

     "Where to?"  Starsky asked, starting up the Torino and backing
out of the driveway.  

     "A jewelry store."

     "I can drop you off at the mall and go order the cake," Starsky
offered, heading down the road toward town.  

     "Sure," Jim agreed, nodding.  "I hope we didn't make too much
noise last night," Jim said.  "We got a little loud."

     "We just figured you were havin' a good time," Starsky said,
smiling slightly.

     "Blair's ticklish.  I guess I wanted to see him really laugh for a
change," Jim admitted, staring out the passenger window.  "He's skin
and bones," Jim said, his tone solemn.  Starsky didn't flinch at the
strange change of subjects.

     "He wasn't lookin' too good when he got here, and then with the
fever and bein' so sick, he didn't eat much.  Even when he got better, he
didn't seem too interested.  I think he's eaten more since you got here
than he did the whole time he was here on his own," Starsky said.

     "I didn't mean for this to happen.  Looking back, I don't know
how things got this...fucked up."

     "Blair said you were having problems before the whole mess
with this Barnes woman."

     "The dissertation.  Yeah, we had some trouble about that."

     "You over that?"

     "After Blair nearly died, it looked pretty minor."

     "What do you think is the reason you chased after somebody
else?"  Obviously sensing the tension in his passenger, Starsky added,
"That's not a challenge or an accusation, Jim.  It's a question.  I'm tryin'
really, really hard to understand this.  You can tell me to butt out if you
want, but then I'm just gonna have to draw my own conclusions."

     "It was like a primal *craving* to make a connection with
another of my own kind.  I knew what Alex Barnes was--a criminal--right 
from the beginning.  It was never about falling in love with
somebody else.  It was about this...*thing* inside me that kept
propelling me to follow her...to protect her."  Jim paused.  "I don't
know what would've happened if Blair hadn't shown up on the beach
when he did."

     "Probably something you couldn't have gotten past."

     "Probably," Jim agreed.  "As it was, I know that image is pretty
hard for him to get out of his mind, and he still thinks she's a threat."

     "Is she?"  Starsky paused.  "Level with me, Jim.  If we have to
deal with some rampant primal urge here, you might as well be honest
so we're all playing with the same set of rules."

     "The truth is that I don't intend to do anything but try to stop
her, apprehend her, protect Blair--all the same intentions I had in Sierra
Verde.  I think I can follow through this time."

     "But there's some room for doubt here."

     "I love Blair more than my own life.  I don't want anyone else. 
Even though we were having some serious problems in our
relationship, I didn't want anyone else then, either.  Blair seems to feel
that the weak link was in our distance from each other--that we weren't
a unified front, and that was what gave Alex her 'in'.  I hope he's right."

     "You don't think you'll fall off the wagon again, but there's no
way to be sure."

     "I have no intention of it, like I said...  I don't want it to happen. 
I'm hoping that now that I'm aware of what the feelings are, I can fight
them."

     "If it comes down to a choice between killin' her or lettin' her
kill Blair, how's it gonna go down?  Because if you don't know the
answer to that one, you'll be takin' my son out of that house over my
dead body."

     "There's no choice there.  I didn't let her kill Blair in Sierra
Verde, when things were at their worst.  I won't let it happen now."

     "That's one thing out of the way then."  Starsky turned into the
parking lot of a large shopping mall.  "They've got about three or four
jewelry stores in there.  I figured while you're doin' that, I'll go order a
cake, and see about some decorations."

     "Sounds great.  We can pick up the groceries on the way home."

     "Meet you back here in an hour?"  Starsky pulled up near the
main entrance.  

     "See you then."  Jim got out of the car and headed into the large
mall, while Starsky started out on his assigned tasks.

********

     Blair lined up the last of the edging, having finished the job his
father had started weeks ago, before his unannounced arrival.  There
always seemed to be something else to do besides the landscaping
work, and it had been too hot outside to much of anything heavy. 
Today it was breezy and mild, pleasant to be outdoors.

     Hutch was planting a few miniature shrubs in a little island of
rock and edging which surrounded the trunk of a large tree.  All in all,
it had been a pleasant, relaxing morning of yard work, though Blair
was plagued with overpowering curiosity about what his father and Jim
could be up to, and more importantly, what on earth would possess
them to go out for several hours together.  As the Torino pulled back
into the driveway carrying the two men in question, Hutch called to
Blair.

     "You wanna give me a hand with this?"  He asked, ready to
lower another small shrub into its new home.  Upon Blair's prolonged
hesitation and staring toward the driveway, he prodded, "Come on,
nosey, quit worrying about what they're doing and give me a hand."

     "If I had my glasses on, I'd know what they were doing," Blair
said, chuckling as he headed over to assist with the shrub.  

     "Your father's going to be thrilled to get out of finishing that
edging."

     "It's the least I can do after dropping in on you and then
proceeding to sweat, writhe and spit up on you both for a week."

     "Well, now Starsky and I can say we've had a taste of real
parenthood."  Hutch chuckled.  "I'm all for inheriting a kid when he's
about 30."

     "Cuts out a lot of the hard parts, doesn't it?"  Blair responded,
laughing. 

********

     "Think we've got time to do this?"  Jim asked, setting the cake
on top of the refrigerator, out of the range of prying eyes.  Starsky was
digging through his bag of decorations.

     "I told Hutch to keep him out in the yard until I called 'em in for
a cold one.  Blair may end up handcuffed to a tree, but he won't come
in here."

     "That's reassuring," Jim retorted, laughing.  

     "I gotta get those balloons outta the trunk."  Starsky headed
back outside.

     "Hopefully Hutch can create a diversion."

     "It's gonna have to be a good one.  That was a much better idea
in the store than it was in the car.  Hey--you better come out with me
and get the food before it curdles out there in the heat."

     Jim took the bags of food out of the back seat of the Torino,
while Starsky unloaded the trunk, literally running to the house with
the brightly-colored assortment of mylar and multi-colored helium
balloons.  Fortunately, he made it while Blair was hunched over the
shrub, adding peat moss at Hutch's direction.  By the time Jim went
back outside to close the trunk, and Blair looked up, he waved
innocently at his lover and went back in the house.  

     "You wanna get the decorations while I get this stuff out of the
bags?  I can make some salad and get the steaks ready for the grill."  

     "You want me to decorate the dining room?"

     "You're taller," Starsky explained, though Jim's height was not
adequate to negate the need to stand on a chair, and hence rendered the
objection virtually useless.

     "You're pulling rank on me, is that it?"  Jim needled, smirking a
little.

     "You catch on quick," Starsky responded, laughing.  "You
might work out as a son-in-law yet."

     Jim set land-speed records putting up the giant "Happy
Birthday" banner, as well as a few streamers.  He placed the helium-
filled balloons at a few different points in the room, tying them to
various pieces of furniture.  He returned to the kitchen to find Starsky
shaking his head as he threw something else into the salad bowl.  

     "What's wrong?"  Jim moved over to look into the large bowl.

     "He actually likes all this shit in his salads?"  Starsky asked. 
"Hutch gave me a list."

     "Oh, yeah.  You should see some of the ones he comes up with
at home."

     "Definitely his mother's genetics at work with this one.  I've
sprayed weed-killer on stuff that looked tastier than this."

     "Keep the bottle of dressing handy.  Italian.  Enough of that
kills anything."

     "Voice of experience?"  Starsky asked, laughing as he tossed
the ingredients together in the bowl.   Jim just laughed.  "I'm surprised
red meat made the menu."

     "Blair eats healthy most of the time, but he's a rabid little
carnivore at heart.  Put a steak in front of him and watch it disappear. 
He'll eat weeds for a week afterwards, but that doesn't stop him from
lapping up the steak.  I better set the table."

     "Did Hutch put that champagne in the fridge?"  Starsky asked,
and Jim checked. 

     "It's in there."

     "Glasses are in the cupboard by the refrigerator."

     Jim set the table and then reported back to the kitchen.  

     "Think we should call 'em in?" he asked Starsky.

     "Could you get Blair to go in through the bedroom patio doors?" 
Starsky asked.  

     "Sure, probably."

     "Good.  Hutch is gonna want to grab a shower, and Blair
probably will too, and I want to get a couple of the side dishes started
and the munchies out there before we spring the trap."

     "Okay."  

     "You can probably create the necessary diversion for a half
hour or so," Starsky said, smiling as he moved from the salad to the
refrigerator.

     "I'm sure I can come up with something," Jim responded,
heading for the bedroom to call Blair inside.

     He entered the room and approached the patio doors.  Before he
could slide the door open to speak to Blair, he froze at the sight before
him.  A large spotted jaguar was prowling across the deck, moving
stealthily down into the grass and making its way toward the two men
working in the yard.  It made a leap as if to pounce, and then vanished. 
Jim sat on the foot of the bed a moment, stunned.  Not only was it
shocking seeing the vision, but the direction of the big cat's leap had
left him dumbfounded.  It had leapt directly toward Hutch.

     He had no feeling that Alex was in the area.  The vision seemed
to be more an omen or premonition than any sign of Alex's presence.  It
carried the same sense of foreboding he'd felt seeing the vision of the
spotted jaguar on the bed back in Cascade.  Bearing that in mind, he
walked out to the kitchen, unsure of how broad-minded Starsky would
be to listen to tales of mythical leaping jaguars.

     "There's something you should know," he said, and Starsky
turned away from the rice dish he was putting together to go on the
stove.

     "What?"  The other man frowned now, detecting the gravity of
Jim's mood.

     "I've had a vision," he said, feeling as ridiculous as he sounded. 
Starsky didn't flinch at the statement, nor did he make any jokes about
it.  

     "You think she's here?"

     "Not yet.  But when she is, the primary initial danger will be to
Hutch."

     "Hutch?  Why would she be after him?"

     "Maybe the diversion we talked about.  Maybe an accident.  I
don't know."

     "What was the vision?"  Starsky prodded.

     "I saw a spotted jaguar leaping at Hutch.  The spotted jaguar is
a... *representation* of Alex in my dreams and visions."

     "Get Blair inside.  I'll get Hutch in here and explain this to
him."

     "Right."  

     Jim called to Blair, who seemed more than ready to come
inside.  As soon as he'd entered the bedroom and peeled off his sweaty
t-shirt, he pinned Jim with an intent gaze.

     "Something's wrong."

     "I saw the spotted jaguar again."

     "You think she's here?"

     "No.  But she's coming."  Jim paused.  "It leapt at Hutch."

     "Did you tell my dad?"

     "Yeah, he knows."

     "Oh, man."  Blair sat on the foot of the bed.  "We should get out
of here.  Get away from them.  I don't feel right about leading her
here."

     "She's not a superhuman monster, Chief.  There are four of us
and one of her, and we know she's coming."

     "Assuming she doesn't have any accomplices."  Blair got up and
started pacing.  "If she were smart, she'd just take off.  Not even mess
with us."

     "She's going to come back for me.  That much I know."  Jim
paused.  "Look, why don't you grab a shower before dinner, huh?"

     "You just told me you think Alex is going after Hutch and you
want to have dinner?"

     "Not eating isn't going to solve the situation.  We'll work it into
our strategy."  Jim rested his hands on Blair's shoulders.  "We're going
to be ready for her this time, sweetheart."

     "I'll get cleaned up for dinner."  Blair went into the bathroom
without further comment, and Jim stood there a moment, staring at the
closed bathroom door.  

     He walked out to the kitchen, where Starsky was still working
on the dinner.  

     "Hutch is in the shower--everything's doin' okay here.  You
better go keep Blair in the bedroom until Hutch gets out here."

     "I will.  Blair'll be a few minutes--the hair," Jim gestured in the
direction of his own head.  "You told Hutch?"

     "I told him.  His reaction was a little bit of skepticism mixed in
with the attitude that it's just one more warning for us to use in
covering our asses."

     "Maybe this trip idea isn't a good one."

     "I still like that idea.  She's gotta feel comfortable making the
approach.  Plus, if she has helpers, she's more likely to come alone if
she thinks she only has to deal with you and Blair."

********

     Blair pulled on a clean pair of cut offs and a favorite old
Rainier T-shirt.  He pulled his hair back in a loose ponytail and stared
at himself in the mirror. //Thirty years old.  Almost didn't see this
particular milestone.// Shaking off the morose thoughts, he headed for
the bedroom door, which opened just then as Jim walked in.  

     "Ready to chow down, Chief?"  he asked.

     "You're up to something," Blair said, grinning.  

     "Just coming to get you for dinner," Jim said with feigned
innocence.  "Come on, Chief, no third degree."  He guided Blair out the
door and steered him toward the dining area.  

     While he had expected some small fuss to be made over his
birthday since it had been mentioned the previous day, he wasn't
prepared for the brightly decorated room, complete with the balloons.  

     "Happy Birthday, kiddo," Starsky said, grinning as he snapped a
picture of Blair and Jim, capturing Blair's stunned smile.  "I need some
new pictures," he said, chuckling.  

     Blair went to the chair which had a giant mylar balloon
attached to the back of it with a bright, multi-colored "HAPPY
BIRTHDAY" emblazoned across its yellow background.  

     "This is really great--I knew we were going to have dinner and
just sort of celebrate at home, but I never thought..."  Blair tugged at
the balloon string as he stood behind the chair.  "Thanks."

     "The balloons were your dad's idea," Jim admitted.

     "Yeah, but I made him do the decoratin'," Starsky confessed,
chortling evilly as he headed back into the kitchen.  

     "I'll get the salad while Starsk tosses the steaks on the grill,"
Hutch offered.

     "No salad just yet."  Starsky walked out with the bottle of
champagne.  "We have to have a toast first."  With a little effort, he
popped the cork, managing not to spray anyone.  He filled all four
glasses, and when everyone had one, he made his toast.  "I'd like to
propose a toast--to Naomi.  Thanks to her, I have a wonderful son in
my life.  I also want to propose a toast to you, Blair.  Thank God you're
healthy and alive and with us to celebrate today.  And thanks for being
such a terrific addition to our lives." 

     "Thanks, Dad," Blair responded, his voice a little thick.  Glasses
clinked together, but before anyone drank, Jim spoke up.

     "I know things have been...difficult since everything happened. 
I just don't want you to ever have to doubt again that you're everything
to me, Chief.  I love you."  Jim tapped his glass lightly against Blair's
and leaned down for a brief kiss to his lips.  

     "Blair, we're glad you're here, and congratulations on hitting the
big 3-0," Hutch summarized, lightening the mood just a bit.  On that
final toast, they all had their first drink of the champagne.  

     Blair continued to be surprised by just how much effort had
been put into creating his favorite foods for the birthday dinner, which
included the rather complex and varied salad, the grilled steaks, the
wild rice, and mixed vegetables.  The cake was a rectangular shape
with blue trim and flowers, with a big "30" candle in the middle of it.  

     When the food had been completely ravaged, the party moved
to the living room, where three brightly wrapped packages waited on
the coffee table.  Jim gladly directed Blair to open his first, since he
had another, more personal gift to share with Blair later.  Blair tore into
the package with his usual enthusiasm.

     "Gee, Jim, a box of boxes.  Just what I always wanted," Blair
teased, opening the large box and taking out a smaller one, then finally
a third, small box.  He opened it and found a set of keys inside.  Keys
that looked very familiar.  "I don't get it."

     "Well, one of the keys is for the loft--you left it behind when
you moved out, and you'll need it again when we get home.  I think you
know what the other two keys are."

     "But they can't be.  I sold the Volvo to buy the truck," Blair
objected, looking up at Jim through widened eyes.

     "I ran a check on it with the DMV and found the guy who
bought it.  It's yours again, Chief.  Safe and sound, waiting for you back
in Cascade."  Jim smiled as Blair clutched the keys in his hand, closed
his eyes and smiled, relishing the thought for just a moment before
moving closer to Jim on the couch and hugging him excitedly.  

     "Thanks," he said sincerely, still holding on.

     "Happy birthday, sweetheart," Jim responded, pulling back for a
kiss before releasing Blair to open his second package.  

     "Oh, man, Hutch, you shouldn't have gotten me anything else.  I
mean, that computer is good for every birthday for the rest of my
*life*," Blair said, pulling the wrapped box onto his lap.

     "Just open it and enjoy, Blair," Hutch responded, smiling. 
Starsky, who was perched on the arm of his chair, took a hold of
Hutch's hand and smiled down at his lover.

     Blair tore into the package with an excited grin, pushing the
paper out of the way and lifting the lid on a white gift box.  He moved
the tissue paper aside, then carefully lifted the item out of its nest.  He
held a nicely detailed leather carrying case, designed for a laptop. 
There was room in it for a few other items, possibly a notebook and a
book and some disks.  Definitely a step up from his backpack toting
days.  

     "It's beautiful," Blair said, running his hand over the supple
black leather.  His eyes bugged a bit when he saw his monogram on it,
in gold lettering, near the handle.  

     "Can't very well toss that new machine in just any old *bag* to
haul it around," Hutch teased, chuckling.

     "This really means a lot to me," Blair said, looking up,
conveying that it was much more than the carrying case that had
special meaning.  He was being adopted by a second "dad", and the
thought warmed him immensely.  "Thanks...for everything," he added.

     "You're welcome."  Hutch looked up at his partner, who was
practically vibrating on the arm of the chair.  "Before your father
bounces off the wall, open his present," Hutch directed.  Blair laughed
a little and with one last touch to the surface of the case, set it aside
and picked up the final box.  It was a bit on the heavy side, smaller
than a shirt box.

     He tore off the paper, then opened the gift box inside and froze
when he looked at the gift itself.  In a heavy brass frame was an 8x10
photo of Naomi and Starsky, obviously posed and professionally taken,
both wearing bright smiles.   It was a head and shoulders shot, at a bit
of a sideways angle, with Starsky standing partially behind Naomi. 
Starsky was wearing a dark blue shirt, and Naomi was wearing an
outfit that sported a paisley scarf in various rich shades of burgundy
and brown.

     "We had it taken last year...about two weeks before your mom
died," Starsky said.  "We'd been putting off doing it for quite a while,
because our schedules never seemed to mesh.  I wanted you to have it
last year, but I thought it was better to hold onto it a while.  I thought it
might have been kinda hard at first."

     Blair didn't say anything.  He ran his fingertips lightly over the
frame, feeling the impact of seeing his mother's smiling face, as well as
the sight he never expected to see--both his parents in one place
together.  

     Concerned by the silence, Starsky moved over to kneel by the
couch, resting a hand on Blair's arm.

     "Hey, kiddo, I'm sorry if it upset you.  I didn't mean to do that."

     Blair carefully set the photo aside on the couch and hugged his
father, holding on tightly, still unable to make the words come out
without tears, which started to come on their own.  

     "It's perfect," he managed between a couple of sharp breaths. 
"It's just...I still miss her so much."

     "I know you do, son.  Photos are really hard to look at
sometimes."  

     "I love it."

     "Good.  If you need to keep it someplace under cover a while
until it doesn't hurt so much to see it, I understand.  You'll always have
it when you want to take a look at it."  Starsky patted Blair's back and
moved away a little.  "You okay?"

     "Yeah, I'm okay now," Blair said, smiling and wiping at his
eyes.  "It just really hit me...I wasn't expecting it."  He picked up the
photo and looked at it again, biting his lip.  "I'll treasure this," he said
softly.

     "Your mom treasured *you*--and I do too.  Think about that
when you look at the picture, huh?"  Starsky said, sliding his arm
around Blair's shoulders and squeezing a little.  

     "I will," Blair said, nodding, smiling again.  

********

     "That was probably the best birthday I ever had," Blair said as
Jim closed the bedroom door behind them.  

     "It's not completely over yet," Jim responded, smiling as Blair
caught sight of the small box sitting on top of one of the brightly
patterned pillows on the bed.  

     "Another present?"  Blair moved over toward the bed, smiling
and climbing onto it, sitting cross-legged on the mattress.  Jim sat
behind him, sliding both arms around him from behind.  

     "This one I wanted to give you when it was just us."  Jim
reached over to the night stand and picked up Blair's glasses.  "You
should probably put these on."

     "Okay."  Blair put on his glasses and opened the little package,
which was wrapped in gold foil paper.  Inside was a dark blue velvet
ring box.  "Jim...what *is* this?"  Blair asked, his voice a little hushed
with obvious surprise.

     "Open it, sweetheart," Jim responded, moving on the bed so he
was facing Blair.  

     Blair slowly opened the lid of the little box, his breath catching
in his throat at the sight of the two plain gold bands inside it.  

     "Yours is engraved," Jim said, pointing at one of the bands.
Blair took the ring out and looked at the inside of it.  

     The inscription read "Like The Stars".  

     "Remember our first date?"  Jim prompted.  "Well, the first
*official* date?"  he amended.

     "The concert at Rainier--and the truck," Blair added, grinning.

     "We decided we didn't have the right words, remember?"

     "Yeah...because expressing how we feel is as impossible as
counting all the stars that were out that night," Blair recalled, smiling
widely at Jim.  "I can't believe you remember that."

     "I remember everything about us, sweetheart.  I always will."

     "Put it on for me?"  Blair said, handing Jim the ring.

     "I will, but not now.  I'll put it on you when we exchange vows,
with our friends and family there.  I asked you to marry me when we
first got together, and we never really followed through on that idea.
*I* never followed through on it."

     "You want to really do that in front of our friends?"  Blair
asked, stunned.

     "I want us to be married, Blair.  I know it's not legal, but it
would be binding to us, and that's what matters."  Jim paused, taking a
hold of Blair's hand.  "I know I hurt you, Chief--"

     "You don't have to do this because of the whole Alex thing,
Jim.  I love you--I know you love me.  We're working things out."

     "Maybe I need to do this because of the Alex thing.  I know you
aren't *expecting* it of me, or that I don't *have* to do it, but I want to. 
I want to make some forever promises to you, and I want to do it with
witnesses."

     "I love you so much it scares me," Blair said, putting the ring
back in the box as Jim held it up and then closed it.       

     "There's nothing to be afraid of anymore, sweetheart.  No more
separations, no more hurting--no one else, ever again."  Jim cupped the
back of Blair's head in his hand and rested his forehead against Blair's. 
"Just you and me, from now on."

     Blair moved up for a kiss, Jim reaching for the hem of his t-shirt, 
pulling the garment over Blair's head as soon as they parted. 
Blair divested Jim of his shirt in similar short order.  Chest to chest,
they wound around each other, falling back on the bed, mouths sealed
together, tongues moving against each other as hands fumbled with
buttons and zippers, finally succeeding in disposing of the rest of the
clothing.  

     "69," Blair whispered against Jim's mouth.

     "Yeah, it was a hell of a year, wasn't it?"  he responded, smiling
before kissing Blair again.

     "It's what I want for my birthday," Blair retorted, moving in for
more kisses.  

     "Ask and you shall receive," Jim said, his lips still pressing
Blair's.  Reluctantly, he left the addictive mouth and moved down on
the bed until they were facing each other, lying opposite directions. 
Moving instinctively, they positioned themselves comfortably for each
other, and in a moment, both men felt their hardening cocks engulfed
in the wet heat of the other's mouth.  

     Jim gently rolled and massaged Blair's balls, and felt Blair
mirror the gesture.  Blair's mouth began mimicking Jim's motions until
he found himself receiving the same blow job he was giving.  He slid a
hand between Blair's legs until his finger reached the tight little hole
hidden between his cheeks.  Probing with his fingertip, he eased it
inside Blair and wiggled it, waiting to feel his own center probed.  In a
moment, Blair's finger was slipping past his own barrier, and they were
sucking in unison, fingers moving in a single rhythm in each other's
bodies.  

     Jim felt himself tensing up, felt the inevitable wave of his
climax building, and he let it come, knowing Blair's was close behind
it.  The eager mouth around his cock milked him, swallowing all he
had to give, writhing a bit helplessly in pleasure as Jim moaned, the
sound vibrating against Blair's cock as it still slid in and out of Jim's
mouth.  One strong hand gripping Jim's ass, mouth leaving his flaccid
cock, Blair spoke.

     "No more.  Wait," he gasped.  "Want to come inside you,
lover," Blair said.  Jim kissed the tip of Blair's cock in response to the
statement, and Blair climbed over him, grabbing the lube they'd stashed
in the night stand and snuggling up behind him.  

     Blair kissed and licked at the muscled back as he carefully
worked two slick fingers into the passage he'd already been teasing
with one.  Jim was relaxed from his first orgasm, and it didn't take him
long to start enjoying the sensations of the stretching fingers.  When
one finally grazed over his prostate, he let out a long, low moan of
pleasure and bore down on the invading fingers.

     "How about the main event, baby?"  Jim goaded.  

     "Hang on, lover.  I'm coming."

     "You better not be yet," Jim quipped.

     "Love you," Blair said softly as he slowly slid into the slick
heat, spooned behind Jim.  In one way, he'd wanted to do it face to face
so he could see Jim's expressions while they made love, but in another,
more compelling way, he wanted them to be relaxed like this,
comfortable, settled in for a long, slow ride.   "So good, Jim...feels so
good," Blair murmured, rocking gently back and forth, sliding in and
out, nudging Jim's prostate with every stroke now, reaching around him
to pump at his cock, which was coming quickly back to life again.  

     Jim was thrusting backward now to meet Blair's forward
thrusts, their voices mingling as they moaned out their pleasure.  Jim
could feel a second climax building, and he began moving a bit faster.

     "Harder, Chief...yeah, like that," he managed, delighted with
Blair's more rapid-fire strokes as they pumped their way toward
completion.  Then he was coming, and Blair was coming at the same
time, and the combination of Jim's flexing, contracting muscles with
Blair's slightly desperate thrusts finished them both.  

     In the sweaty afterglow, Blair's breath was warm against his
back, the softening cock still buried deep inside him.  Then Blair was
kissing again, moving across Jim's shoulders, up to the back of his
neck, then fastening lips and tongue on the side of Jim's throat as he
eased out of his body.  A passion mark was left in his wake.  

     "Now you're mine," Blair said, licking over the spot.  

     "I always was, sweetheart," Jim responded, rolling onto his
back and pulling Blair on top of him.  

     "Always will be, too," Blair said, smiling against Jim's chest as
he settled down to sleep.  "I love you."

     "I love you too, baby.  Happy Birthday."

     "Yeah, it sure was."  Blair sighed contentedly and drifted off to
sleep in Jim's arms.

********

     Jim felt restless, and finally stirred, realizing Blair's weight
wasn't entirely against him anymore, though he could feel the warm
flesh of his lover's back against his arm.  Giving in to the unease he
felt, he opened his eyes and sat up, looking toward the patio doors. 
There, pacing back and forth on the deck, was the black jaguar.  It
paused, locked eyes with Jim, and snarled, before turning and running
across the grass and into the trees, heading toward the beach.  

     Slipping out of bed, Jim pulled on a handy pair of shorts and a
t-shirt, stuck his feet into old athletic shoes he'd left by the patio doors,
and stealthily slipped out into the pre-dawn haze, following the path of
the large black cat.

********

     Starsky woke up and rubbed at his eyes.  The clock on the night
stand read six a.m.  Looking behind him, he saw that Hutch was
already up, as the bed was empty.  

     "Morning comes earlier and earlier around this place every
day," he grumbled to himself, slightly miffed by his partner's propensity
for rising and shining at dawn even in semi-retirement.  After making a
stop in the bathroom, he put on his robe and plodded out to the kitchen,
a little surprised not to smell coffee brewing.  Ellison was usually up
early, so Hutch wouldn't have worried about waking him with the
scent, and Blair could sleep through a herd of wild elephants running
over the bed, so a little coffee smell wouldn't disturb him.  

     Yawning, he pushed the swinging door to the kitchen open and
paused, puzzled.  The room was splashed with the morning sun, but it
was undisturbed and empty.  No sign of Hutch, no rinsed out blender
pitcher from one of his poisonous health potions, nothing...  Feeling
distinctly uneasy now, Starsky went to the basement door and opened
it, flipping on the light.

     "Hutch?"  he called down the steps.  Nothing but silence
answered him.  Swallowing, trying to push down the unease he felt, he
went down the steps into the basement, and looked around the large
open area.  Nothing seemed out of place--there were cartons there with
Blair's stored belongings in them, the washer and dryer, the big utility
sink, a clothesline, their own stored cartons, the furnace and central air
unit... but no Hutch.  

     He returned to the kitchen and went back toward the bedroom
area.  He tapped on the door of Blair's and Jim's room, then pushed it
open to see Blair stirring in the bed, alone. 

     Something was wrong.  Dead wrong.

     "Blair, wake up," he said, moving into the room.  "Come on,
kiddo, it's Dad," he said, shaking Blair's shoulder lightly.

     "What?  What's wrong?"  Blair raised up on one elbow, pushing
his hair out of his face.  

     "Maybe nothing, but I want you to get dressed and come with
me.  I can't find Hutch."

     "Where's Jim?"  Blair asked, his eyes widening a little.

     "I haven't seen him either."

     "Oh, man."  Blair got out of bed while Starsky picked up Jim's
gun from the bedside table. 

     "He either didn't go far, or didn't go intentionally," he said. 
"You still have that .38 I gave you?"  

     "Yeah, I've got it."  Blair paused after pulling on a pair of jeans
and rummaged through the desk drawer, producing the gun.  

     "Good.  Keep it handy.  I'm gonna put some clothes on." 
Starsky hurried back into the master bedroom and changed into jeans
and the blue t-shirt he'd tossed over a chair the night before.  After
pulling on a pair of sneakers, he met Blair in the living room.  He was
wearing his gun in a belt holster, and was checking Jim's for ammo. 
"Here."  He fastened a belt holster onto Blair's belt.  "Use Ellison's
piece.  It's more powerful.  Put it right in there."

     "Dad, I--"

     "Just do it.  You know how to shoot that thing?"

     "Yeah.  Jim's had me shoot targets with it a few times."

     "Good."  Starsky tucked the extra gun in the back of his
waistband.  "We're going over this house, and then outside."

     The phone rang, startling both men.  Starsky picked it up, and
was greeted by a woman's voice.

     "You've noticed by now that your partner is gone," she said. 

     "Alex Barnes," he said simply.

     "Saves me the trouble of introductions," she responded.  "If you
want to see him alive again, send your son to me.  He should have with
him $100,000.  I'm sure you can come up with that sum of money to
save your partner's life."

     Starsky glanced at the caller ID display sitting on the end table
near the living room telephone.  "Out of Area".  

     "All you want is my son and 100 grand.  How generous.  How
do I know Hutch is even still alive?"

     "I don't find corpses to be valuable commodities, Starsky."

     "I want to talk to him."

     "I'm sure you do.  When I have my money, you will."

     "This isn't about the money, lady.  I know that.  This is about
the courier who brings it to you."

     "I guess you'll have to make a choice, won't you?"  There was a
pause, and then she added, with a smile in her voice, "Or you could try
to have it all, which should make for an interesting game.  The
deadline is midnight tonight, and the place is the cave on the beach. 
I'm sure you know it."

     "I know it."

     "Good.  If Blair isn't there at midnight tonight with the money,
Hutchinson dies.  I think you know that if you call in any cops, I'll
know it.  So I'd advise you to keep this all in the family," she added
before breaking the connection.
     
     "She wants me?"  Blair asked.

     "You and $100,000 by midnight tonight.  She's gotta be crazy."

     "She *was* in an asylum, catatonic, so maybe that's not so far
fetched."  Blair frowned.  "She never mentioned Jim?"

     "No."  Starsky sat against the back of the couch.  "I didn't
mention him either because maybe he's tracking her."

     "She could be listening in on us right now."

     "She could be.  If she's watching the house that closely, she
knows that Jim's gone anyway, so we're not tellin' her anything." 
Starsky stood up and started pacing.  

     "There's only one thing to do."

     "What?"  he paused and turned to look at Blair.

     "Send me to the cave at midnight with the money."

     "She'll kill you.  Are you crazy?"

     "We don't know that for sure, but we do know that she'll kill
Hutch if I don't.  My guess is she'll want to use me to get to Jim--in case
she needs any help getting to Jim," Blair added, a little regretfully.  "I
think it'll be more of a hostage trade than a murder.  I trust you to get
me back," Blair added, smiling.

     Starsky hated himself for the momentary flicker of temptation
he felt to go along with Blair's plan.  Never in his life had anything
been as precious to him as Hutch, and never had anything been beyond
sacrificing to save his partner.  It chilled him that he wanted to believe
sending his own son into the lion's den was a "hostage trade", and
something reversible--in other words, that it was any real solution.  He
loathed himself completely for the moment of temptation when he
looked at Blair, standing there, ready to walk to his own death in order
to give Starsky back what was most precious to him.  

     "No," he said simply, putting his arm around Blair's shoulders. 
"Not my son.  We've gotta think of somethin' else."

     "What if we don't?  I'm not going to sit back and let her kill
Hutch."

     "I'm not going to do that either, Blair.  She can take me out first
herself, but I'm not lettin' her have Hutch.  I'm also not handin' her my
son just because she asks nicely."

     "What're we gonna do then?  We have to find Jim."

     "I don't know."  Starsky moved away then, scratching at his
hair.  "You're the expert on Sentinels.  Instead of offering to throw
yourself into the volcano, how about usin' some of that top-flight gray
matter up there to come up with somethin'?"

     "I'm trying," Blair protested.  "Most of the ideas I'm coming up
with involve my going to the drop tonight.  Dad, I'm telling you, it's the
only way.  I might be able to outwit Alex, do something to distract her. 
Maybe it would give Jim the opening he needs."

     "Jim?  We don't even know where the hell he is!"

     "He's close."  Blair nodded, with conviction.  "He's close by.  I
don't know where, and I can't explain it, but I know he hasn't deserted
us."  Blair rubbed at his temples as if he had the world's worst
headache.  "I have to save Hutch and Jim has to save me, and you have
to save Jim."  Blair looked up at Starsky suddenly, as if he had just
figured the whole thing out.       
     
     "The only weak link here is that we don't know where Jim is."

     "He won't let me die a second time.  I know that.  It's a game,
Dad.  This whole thing is a game to her.  A game to test loyalties--to
cause divisions between all of us--a game to test her hold over Jim..."

     "Well, if he flunks, I don't want to give up my son because of a
misjudgment."

     "Hutch is with her.  You trust him, don't you?"

     "I don't know if he's injured, or tied up too securely to do
anything.  Even if he's alive and well and with her when you drop off
the money, that doesn't mean that he'll be in any position to help you. 
Or that she'll release him once you show up."

     "If she killed Hutch, you would hunt her to the ends of the
earth, isn't that right?"

     "Until I took her out personally, yes," Starsky said with certain,
cold conviction.

     "If she killed me--"

     "Same thing."

     "But if Jim kills me--"

     "Where are you going with this?"

     "It's what she wants, Dad.  She wants the ultimate allegiance
from Jim.  She wants them to bond as Sentinels, and she wants him to
renounce me in the most fundamental way possible.  By killing me."

     "How do you figure all this?"

     "I don't know.  All of a sudden, I just...*knew* it," Blair said,
frowning a little.  

     "After that pain in your head, or whatever it was?"

     "There was a sharp pain, and then it was as if...as if the
knowledge was just...*there*...and I could feel that Jim was nearby,
and it was like that was what I had to understand in order to do the
right thing.  Dad, you've got to let me take the money and meet her
tonight.  This thing has to play out.  She'll let Hutch go--she doesn't
want him, and she doesn't want you pursuing her to the ends of the
earth, either."  Blair paused.  "I have to put my life in Jim's hands.  I
trust him."

     "Forgive me for being a little skeptical here, but this is *crazy*. 
We don't know where Ellison is, and the last time you trusted him with
her--"

     "He didn't let her kill me."

     "Maybe you want to trust him on this point, but I don't."

     "We have no choice.  You know as well as I do that the moment
you call in back-up to help, she'll know it, and she *will* kill Hutch. 
She's snapped a man's neck before with her bare hands.  He's only
worth to her the price he can fetch, and if that price isn't what she
wants, he's dead."  
     
     "You're the only two people in this world it wouldn't be an easy
choice for me to hand over, one for the other," Starsky said honestly.  "I
won't send you to your death, Blair.  I love you too much for that,"
Starsky said honestly.
     
     "You stepped in front of a bullet to save Jim's life, because you
knew he was the other half of me, that I'd never make it without him.  I
think, in this world, sometimes when you put your faith in doing the
right thing because you love somebody, it works.  You survived, and
Jim was saved.  This is the same thing, Dad, just a different set-up.  I
know in my heart it'll work.  I have that faith."

     "You're putting your faith in Ellison and we don't even know
where he is."

     "You're right, I am.  When this is over, he wants to exchange
vows, in front of our friends--Dad, he renewed that commitment to me,
he promised me.  He meant it.  I believe him.  He isn't going to betray
me."

     "He did before."

     "Yeah, he did, but we're stronger than that now.  He won't
sacrifice my life for her."  Blair paused.  "But he might sacrifice
Hutch's."

     "What?"  Starsky looked at Blair, stunned.

     "You've got to understand that Jim is drawn to Alex, bonded to
her in a very primal sense.  Something beyond logic and reason.  A
primitive--"

     "Urge, yeah, you told me.  We've been down this road before."

     "It's gotta be met with another primitive urge, Dad.  Not with a
sense of right and wrong.  I mean, sure, Jim likes Hutch and under
normal circumstances, whether he liked him or not, he'd risk his life to
save him--he's a cop, it's what he does.  But when faced with the pull to
Alex, it's gotta be an equal pull that makes him fight her.  A primal
urge to protect his mate.  I think he sees me as that mate now.  I think
he'll know the right path to choose."

     "You *think*?"

     "Yeah, I think.  There are risks here for all of us.  But this is the
only way we've all got a shot at coming out of this thing alive.  See,
Jim's drawn to her, and if I can't fight that, I might lose him.  You could
lose Hutch.  We'll both be sitting here safe and sound with the other
halves of our souls torn away.  If it makes you feel better, you can
figure I'm doing what I'm doing to fight for Jim, and you're doing what
you do to save Hutch.  Nothing's gonna stop me from fighting her for
Jim.  She isn't going to have my place, even it that's what she wants."

     "This is crazy."

     "I agree.  But I'm right."

********

     Hutch opened his eyes and scanned his surroundings.  He was
in a cave, of all things.  Rolling his eyes a little, wondering why he
couldn't have come to in a more mundane, less theatrical setting. 
There was firelight somewhere in the cave, as it flickered just around
the corner from the shadowy spot where he lay on his side, ankles and
wrists bound.  

     //Getting up for a cup of herbal tea on a sleepless night had
never been especially risky behavior in the past,// he thought, sighing. 
//Apparently Ellison's radar was down, because he hadn't sensed any
danger or heard anything unusual--at least, not in time to intervene.//  

     Struggling into a sitting position, he leaned against the
uncomfortably hard, uneven wall of the cave.  He blinked a few times
at the throbbing in his head, remembering now the blow that he hadn't
seen coming.  It had been just before dawn, and he'd had the bright idea
to step out on the deck and watch the sunrise with his tea--something
he often did while Starsky still slept and he himself was awake.  Today
it had been a potentially fatal error.  

     "You're awake," a woman's voice said, as a shadowed figure
came closer.  She was dressed in black jeans and a black t-shirt, her
straight blonde hair brushing her shoulders.  Shapely and tall, with
large blue eyes and full lips, she was certainly a head-turner.  Just the
kind of woman he would have competed with Starsky for in the old
days, back before he figured out he liked brunets with chest hair better.

     "You must be Alex Barnes," he said.

     "You've heard of me.  I'm flattered."  She sat on a nearby rock,
regarding her hostage.  "You know, I'm not really interested in hurting
you or your partner.  This isn't about the two of you.  I'm sorry you had
to get involved."

     "Yeah, well, I'm not crazy about it either, lady."  

     "If my demands are met, you won't be hurt.  You'll be released,"
she said.

     "For someone who's catatonic, you certainly seem coherent."

     "I was...out of it for a while.  But at a point, I came back.  The
isolation of padded cells tends to...help you focus.  I'm told I was
hysterical at some point, and they put me in one for my own protection. 
Then I became catatonic...for a time."  She smiled, opening a canteen. 
"Would you like some water?"

     "It's a little tough to drink like this," Hutch complained, tugging
at his restraints.  
     
     "Sorry.  That's a necessary evil.  I'll hold it for you."  She did as
promised, while he took a few swallows of water.  

     "What do you hope to accomplish by kidnaping me?"

     "I'm after a more valuable hostage," she said simply.  "No
offense intended," she added, smiling a bit.

     "None taken, beyond the obvious," he said, tugging at his ropes.

     "You'll get chafed doing that, and they won't give way," she
said, nodding toward him as he pulled at the ropes.  "You have fair
skin--I bet it breaks easily.  Mine does too," she said.

     "Who's the more valuable hostage?"

     "Blair.  I couldn't get close to him with Ellison always there, or
your partner hovering over him.  He was never alone.  You were an
opportunity that presented itself," she said.  "I asked for a trade,
basically.  Blair and a little traveling money in return for you.  I think
your partner would prefer having his lover to having his son."

     "He wouldn't make that choice," Hutch said.

     "You'd be surprised the choices men make," she said, smiling
seductively.  "Very surprised."

     "You must have had help to pull this off."

     "The escape or kidnaping you?  I realize it's usually a body-blow to 
a man's ego to be overpowered by a woman."  She smiled,
enjoying the moment, savoring her captive's discomfiture.  "If it
preserves your manhood to know, I did have help carrying you back
here.  But I knocked you out.  I find involving as few...*helpers* as
possible is usually the best policy.  They tend to get in the way later."

     "Just ask your old pal, Hettinger."

     "Carl?"  Alex actually laughed a little.  "Carl thought he was the
boss, and he tried to double-cross me. *That* was his mistake."

     "What do you really want from all this?"

     "Are you sure you want to know?   If I tell you too much, I'll
have to kill you."  She stood up, screwing the cap back on the canteen. 
"I'll be back to check on you later."  She walked around the bend in the
cave wall, toward the more brightly lit area, disappearing from Hutch's
line of vision.  

     "Great," he mumbled under his breath.  "She's as crazy as
Colonel Sonny."  The cramping in his leg reminded him of the injury
that had caused it, when he lay in a ravine, trapped beneath his car for
days with his only contact being a shell-shocked and seriously
delusional war veteran who was confident Hutch was a German spy. 
"At least she has better legs," he grumbled, wiggling his own cramping
leg ineffectually.

********

     Starsky counted out the bills into neat piles while Blair opened
up the small gym bag being used to make the drop.  

     "I still don't like this," Starsky said, shaking his head as he
started loading the money in the bag.

     "It's the only way.  It's going to work, Dad.  Don't worry about
it."  Blair zipped the top of the bag.

     "Don't *worry* about it?  My son and my partner are on the line
here."

     "Don't worry about it," Blair repeated, his tone inordinately
calm.  "Everything will work out just fine.  I know it."

     "You want to share how you know it?"

     "I just...*know*."  Blair sat down at the kitchen table, across
from his father, the bag on the table between them.  "When Jim
brought me back, something happened--I told you about the vision we
shared about the merge of the spirit animals?"

     "Forgive me if leaping phantom cats aren't enough reassurance
to put your head on the chopping block."

     "Since that happened...I can't explain this well...there's been a
stronger link between Jim and me.  Before Jim showed up here, I knew
he needed me.  The night I called him, he'd had a vision about Alex.  I
didn't know that, but I really felt drawn to call him, even against my
better judgment, sort of, when I still wanted time to myself.   When he
showed up here, he *knew* I needed him.   Now, it's like I just know
what I need to know, because wherever he is, Jim knows it--and he
wants me to know that he's not far away."

     "I've heard of people coming back from near death experiences
with some sort of psychic power..."  Starsky shrugged.

     "Right, sort of like that, only the link is between Jim and me. 
Our ability to communicate without words has gotten stronger, and
now that we're together again, now that we've...*consummated* that
union again, I think it's even more powerful."

     "If you're wrong about this--"

     "I'm not."

     "You better not be."  Starsky looked Blair straight in the eyes. 
"You're dealing with the two most precious people in my life.  If you're
not sure, for any reason, we'll find another way."

     "I'm sure, Dad.  I'm *positive*," Blair repeated emphatically.

     "Okay."

     "How'd you round up all this cash, anyway?"  Blair asked,
knowing his father had spent considerable time at the bank.  

     "I cleaned out all our savings, cashed in a few investments--it
took a while to round it all up, but fortunately, there was a really good
investment person on duty today who knew how to help me cut through
some red tape.  I told them it was a personal emergency in the family."

     "I guess this qualifies, huh?"  Blair asked rhetorically.

     "How do you see this going down?  I know you'll go to the cave
with the money--"

     "You have to let me go alone at first--"

     "Absolutely not.  I back you up, or we don't do this."

     "Okay, Alex is probably going to be expecting that."  Blair
paused.  "You have to stay back as far as you can."

     "Okay, I can do that."

     "I'll make the delivery to Alex like she asked, and she'll let
Hutch go."

     "Why should she?"

     "Alex had to escape from a mental ward.  My guess is she might
have one accomplice.  She tended to work alone, even when she was
hooked up with Hettinger.  They were essentially her operations.  I
don't think she'll change her M.O.  That being the case, there's a lot to
be said for not having to manage more than one hostage at a time."

     "Killing him would provide the same solution."

     "Yeah, I suppose it would."  Blair paused.  "I think she'll want
you off her back."

     "And she thinks I ever would be when she has you?"

     "If she sends Hutch out unharmed, and warns you to stay away
or she'll kill me--and we know she'll know if someone's approaching--she 
might see it as the best way to neutralize you both--at least long
enough to get the job done."

     "Seems like blasting her way in here would have been simpler."

     "Possibly, but then she had at least three out of four of us
armed, and a potential for a disaster."

     "Well, we've got three hours until midnight," Starsky said
grimly, looking at his watch.  "All I can say is, Ellison better show up
there the way you think he will."

     "He will."  

********

     "We'll need to move you to the front of the cave now.  It's
almost midnight."

     "What happens at midnight?"  Hutch asked, assessing his
opportunity for an escape attempt as she untied his ankles.  "Does my
coach turn into a pumpkin?"

     "Your ransom arrives."  She backed away.  "Stand up."  She
pulled out her gun, releasing the safety.

     "Maybe you'll want to hold off shooting me until the money
gets here."

     "I don't plan on shooting you at all if you behave yourself."  She
waited while Hutch struggled up to his feet, his hands still bound
behind his back.  He tried to move forward, but his leg cramped,
making him lurch and catch himself by leaning against the wall.  "What
is it?"  she asked, visibly impatient.

     "I had a leg injury a long time ago.  It was broken a couple of
places.  Keeping it bound that long...it's cramping.  I can't walk like
this, so I guess you'll have to either untie me so I can rub out the
cramps, or shoot me."  Alex was quiet a long time, watching Hutch as
he leaned against the rock wall, his discomfort obvious.

     "All right.  I'm warning you though--one false move and you're
dead."

     "Look, lady, I can't walk away from this wall until I get the leg
working again, so false moves are a little out of my league right now."  

     "Hold still," she said, tucking her weapon in the front of her
jeans briefly while she undid the ropes most of the way, leaving a little
resistance in them that would hold Hutch up enough not to be able to
have free use of his hands until she had backed away with the gun
pointed at him again.  

     After freeing himself from the remains of the restraints, he went
to work on massaging the stiffened leg, grimacing at the discomfort in
it as the circulation got going again.  

     "What happened?"  she asked, waving the gun to indicate his
leg.

     "I was pinned under my car for two days.  The car was on my
leg."

     "You're lucky you still have it."

     "No argument there."

     "Now, let's take it nice and slow, walk ahead of me until I tell
you to stop," she said.  Hutch followed the directive, making his way
around the bend and into the larger chamber of the cave, the place that
opened out onto the beach.  Alex had her camp there, with a fire
burning and her supplies piled neatly to one side.  She was obviously
preparing for a journey.  

     A dark-haired, bearded Hispanic man of about thirty, dressed in
a white t-shirt and jeans, appeared at the mouth of the cave.  A pair of
binoculars hung around his neck.

     "He's coming alone," he reported.  Hutch found it peculiar that a
Sentinel should need a lookout, let alone should need to be told when
someone was approaching.  

     "Cover him," she waved the gun toward Hutch.  "Blair will
come in when he gets here."

     Within a few moments, a silhouette appeared in the mouth of
the cave--Blair, dressed in jeans and a green short sleeved shirt, hair
caught in a loose ponytail, carrying the gym bag containing the
monetary portion of Hutch's ransom. 
     
     "Come in, Blair," Alex invited, smiling a little.  "You look
well," she said.

     "I'm all right," Blair responded tersely.  "Hutch--are you okay?" 
Blair looked over to Hutch, where he leaned against the wall, Alex's
accomplice's gun aimed directly at him.

     "I'm fine, Blair."

     "Good," Blair held out the bag with the money.  "It's all in there. 
$100,000."

     "Just set it over there."  She watched as he followed the
direction.  "Now turn around and face the wall, hands behind your
back," she said.  Blair followed that order as well, and Alex tucked her
gun in her waistband and picked up a nearby coil of rope, tying Blair's
wrists securely behind his back.  She pulled him around to face her,
holding the gun on him again.  "Let him go," she instructed her
companion in regard to Hutch.  "Go on," she directed to Hutch, who
look a bit surprised that she was actually holding up her end of the
deal.  

     "What are you going to do with him?"  he asked.  Blair was
leaning against the wall, hands bound, Alex's gun on him.  

     "He's not your concern anymore.  He's part of your ransom.  All
you need to do is get going.  But one word of warning--if either you or
your partner tries anything, I'll know, and I will put a bullet in his
head."

     "Isn't that what you're planning anyway?"  Hutch challenged,
unable to believe that Starsky would trade his son for him.  As much as
they loved each other, and as much as they would both readily die for
each other, that Starsky would hand over *Blair's* life left him
incredulous.  That he had managed to get Ellison to go along with
handing Blair over was just as unlikely.  There had to be a plan in here
somewhere, and Hutch desperately hoped he wasn't missing some clue
or some signal for action.

     "Not at all.  Blair is very important to me for a number of
reasons.  As long as he cooperates, I don't have any reason to hurt him. 
Now get moving, before I change my mind," she said, releasing the
safety on her gun and pressing it against Blair's temple.  

     "Go on, Hutch.  Do as she says," Blair encouraged, swallowing
hard at the feeling of the barrel of the gun pressed to his flesh.  

     Hesitantly, Hutch started out of the cave, then began walking
briskly across the sand, heading in the direction of his home, praying
that Starsky and Jim had some worthwhile plan in mind.

********

     Starsky was poised in the underbrush, binoculars trained on the
beach.  He'd watched Blair as long as he was visible, and now he
waited, his heart in his throat, to see some sign of his partner. 
Accompanying his anxiousness to see Hutch was the cold, sick dread in
the pit of his stomach that this whole thing would crash around their
ears, and that Blair's "psychic knowledge" was a lot of romantic
wishful thinking by a guy who couldn't accept he'd been dumped again. 

     Just then, a familiar form appeared in the range of his
binoculars, and he could just make out the slight glint of blond under
the bright moonlight.  Never one to practice a lot of self-restraint where
his partner was concerned, Starsky sprang out of his hiding place,
calling to Hutch and heading down the hillside.  

     The two men met in a crushing embrace, Starsky unwilling to
let go until he'd had his fill of closeness.  

     "I hope you've got one hell of a plan in place, babe," Hutch said,
pulling back.  

     "Are you okay?  You looked like you were limpin' on the beach
there."

     "My leg got a little annoyed with being tied up in one spot so
long.  Starsk--"

     "Blair came up with the plan."  Starsky moved back, pacing a
little.  "He's convinced Ellison is going to show up and save the day."

     "Show up?  Where is he?"

     "I don't know."

     "Okay, let me get this straight.  You sent your son to the woman
who already killed him once to free me, assuming that Ellison will save
the day, but we don't know where Ellison is?"

     "That's a fair assessment, yeah.  Look, Blair claims to have a
psychic...*link* of some sort to Jim--he says he *knew* how this had to
play out, that it was like he was getting the knowledge from Jim.  And
he was convinced that Jim was going to show up to save him, because
Alex was going to use him to lure Jim."

     "So we've entrusted Blair's life to a flimsy theory when the truth
of the matter is that Ellison might just be off following his dick again?"

     "I would've never gone along with it if Blair hadn't been so
sure."

     "Blair doesn't want to believe that Jim could make the same
mistake twice."  Hutch shook his head.  "We've got to do something."

     "I agree.  You've been inside the cave--"

     "She said she'd kill Blair if we came near her."  Hutch frowned
a moment.  "You know, I did find it odd she was using a lookout to
watch for Blair."

     "What does she need with a lookout?"  Starsky asked, smiling a
bit evilly.
     
********

     Alex sat down on a rock across from where her captive sat on
the ground, his back resting against the wall of the cave.  

     "How long have your senses been off line?"  Blair asked.  Alex
stared at him, visibly stunned.

     "How did you know that?"

     "I've lived with a Sentinel for four years.  I know."

     "When I came to in the hospital, they were just...*gone*. 
Everything was normal.  I tried to reach out with my senses, but
nothing happened."

     "You probably fried your receptors with whatever was in that
potion you drank in the temple.  Not to mention the fact that you're
using your abilities for criminal purposes."

     "I don't need a lecture on morals."  She stood up and started
pacing.  "I just need to know how to get this thing working again."

     "Alex, it's not that simple.  There's a spiritual dimension to this--
you of all people should know that after what you experienced in
Sierra Verde.  You can't trick it or cheat it or outwit it.  The only way
you'll ever get your abilities back is if you really made a choice to use
them to help people."

     "I had them before, and I was pulling heists.  So why would
they suddenly disappear now, based on some lofty moral principles?"

     "I don't know.  Maybe because now you know what they are,
and it hasn't changed how you want to use them.  Look, I don't know
everything there is to know about this, but I do know that loss of the
senses is usually a sign of either emotional distress or some sort of
spiritual crisis.  In your case, using your senses to pull heists, thinking
of all the *criminal* things you could do with them when you drank
that...stuff you made...those were all things that went against the very
principle of why people are granted this gift."

     "So if I suddenly renounced a life of crime and became a
missionary, my abilities would come back."

     "They would it if you made that choice honestly--in your heart--
and not just to get your abilities back."

     "There has to be some way to...*recharge* them."

     "You're looking for an easy answer, and I don't have one, Alex. 
I have an answer, but it isn't easy.  It's not the one you want."

     "Then you really aren't of much use to me, are you?"  She
released the safety on the gun and pointed it at Blair.  "You should
have bluffed a little better, Blair.  I had no real desire to kill you, but
you're back to being just a liability."

     "Do you think Jim is going to be able to love you after you
murder me?"

     "It didn't seem to bother him too much before."

     "Alex."  Jim's voice startled them both from where he stood at
the mouth of the cave.  He shoved Alex's accomplice into the cave in
front of him, sending the man stumbling to his hands and knees.  "You
need better security," he said, checking the fallen man's weapon for
bullets.

     "Drop the gun, or I'll put a bullet in his brain," she said simply,
keeping the gun on Blair.  Jim tossed aside the gun he was holding.  

     "Killing Blair would be a foolish thing to do.  He's really very
useful, and my senses *aren't* off-line."  Jim moved a bit closer.  

     "I'm just supposed to believe that this isn't some sort of set-up?" 
Alex challenged.  "How do I know you're telling the truth?" 

     "Remember the beach in Sierra Verde?  How it felt when we
were together?"  Jim moved closer.  "What we felt when we kissed in
the temple?  We're two of a kind, Alex.  Nothing could measure up to
what it was like between us."

     "What about him?  You two are lovers."

     "People have a lot of lovers in a lifetime.  What happened
between us was fated...meant to be.  We can have that together, Alex." 
Jim moved a bit closer.  

     "There's one way you might convince me that you're sincere."

     "You still need proof?"

     She glanced back at her accomplice, who was back on his feet
now, weapon in hand.  

     "Emilio, keep your weapon pointed at the back of his head," she
said, indicating Jim.  She moved to a nearby backpack, and pulled out a
blunt, square-looking handgun and handed it to Jim.  "Shoot him."

     "What?"

     "You heard me.  If you want to be with me, I need proof I can
trust you, and that you aren't still carrying a torch for someone else. 
We don't need him anymore, and he'll only slow us down.  You know
how to use your senses, control them.  You can help me.  He's excess
baggage.  Unless you're still in love with him."

     "I'm not crazy about a murder rap hanging over my head."

     "I have more than one hanging over my head.  If you're really
serious about being with me, that won't matter.  We'll always be on the
run anyway."

     "If I refuse?"

     "I'll kill you both," she said calmly.  "If you try turning on me,
Emilio will blow the back of your head off."

     "Jim...just do it.  There's no way out of this," Blair said, feeling
the icy dread in the pit of his stomach of having made a fatal
miscalculation about their chances for success in defeating Alex. 
Better if at least Jim could survive this.  With a gun trained on the back
of Jim's head, as well as Alex's weapon aimed at him, he was a dead
man no matter what he did--unless he pulled the trigger on Blair.  

     "Nobody move!!"  Starsky's voice bellowed from the mouth of
the cave where he stood, gun held out in both hands, aimed directly
toward Jim and Alex.  

     Seizing what he figured would be the only opportunity to end
this without a bullet in Jim's head, Blair shot his feet forward, tangling
them with Alex's, sending her sprawling on the ground.  Jim lurched
down as Emilio pulled the trigger a heartbeat too late to hit the back of
Jim's head.  Another shot rang out from behind, and Emilio fell to the
ground, blood oozing from a large wound in his back.  

     Hutch walked toward them from the interior of the cave, gun
aimed at the fallen man.  Starsky approached Alex, who seemed to be
entertaining potentially suicidal thoughts of reaching for her weapon
again.  

     "Go ahead, reach for it," Starsky said ominously.  "You killed
my son once.  Give me an excuse to blow your head off," he added. 
She retracted her hand from its proximity to the gun.  "Hands on the
back of your head, and stay down!"  Starsky barked at her, grabbing a
piece of her own rope to bind her hands behind her back.  

     Jim untied Blair and pulled him into a tight embrace.  Kissing
his mouth, then his chin, his face and his neck, Jim buried his face
against Blair's neck.  

     "Thank God," he muttered.

     "I knew you'd come and get me," Blair said, hanging on tightly. 
"Love you so much," he whispered, just loud enough for Sentinel ears
to hear him.  

     "Never anyone but you, baby, remember?  I promised."  Jim
pulled back and rested his forehead against Blair's, smiling a little,
finding the expression returned with a look of pure joy--and love. 
Looking up at Starsky and Hutch, Jim asked, "You guys need any
help?"

     "I think I can handle her," Starsky said, hauling Alex along
roughly by his grip on her arm.  
     "The meat wagon can handle him," Hutch said of the dead man
on the ground.  "Let's get out of here."     

********

     It was dawn before the Bay City PD finished their once-over of
the cave and the surrounding area, and the FBI had taken charge of
Alex.  Exhausted and drained from the events of the previous 24 hours,
as well as prolonged and grueling recitations of their experiences with
a number of different cops and agents, the four men trudged home.

     "Rumor has it there's a bed and a shower in this place," Hutch
grumbled as he plodded in through the patio door.  "Don't you lock the
doors around here anymore?"  he groused at his partner.

     "All the bad guys were *down there*," Starsky reminded,
yawning.

     "Hey, we're all alive, let's not rip each other's heads off," Blair
stated as Jim and he entered the kitchen.

     "Anybody hungry?"  Hutch asked, falling into a kitchen chair.  

     "You're the young one.  Fetch us somethin', will ya?"  Starsky
nudged Blair, falling into the chair next to Hutch's.  "Shit, I'm too old
for this crap."  

     "*You're* too old for it?  Who was the one hogtied for sixteen
hours?"  Hutch shot back.

     "I remember a day when you wouldn't have bitched about gettin'
tied up by a sexy blonde."

     "Shut up, dickhead.  I'm too fucking tired for that too," Hutch
groaned, massaging his leg again.  

     "Fuck you, you old grouch.  Put that up here and let the master
do his work."  Starsky pulled his chair back and Hutch flopped the leg
over his partner's lap with a groan.  Starsky matter-of-factly massaged
it, his fingers finding exactly which spots were causing the most
trouble.  Hutch reached over and caressed the dark curls, and Starsky
just smiled, not looking up from his task.

     "Eggs okay for everybody?"  Blair asked.  Jim, not about to be
grouped with those "too old" to make breakfast, washed his hands and
started in on the toast.  

     "Anything you put in front of us, Blair," Hutch said.

     "Except for a pitcher of that bilge water with the lumps in it you
drink for breakfast," Starsky amended.  

     "I knew that smell reminded me of *something*," Jim added.

     "You know, Jim, you're going to have to live with me after we
go home, and it could be a really cold summer in Cascade if you don't
watch it, man."  Blair washed up and then started cracking eggs.

     "I'm looking forward to living with you for the rest of our lives,
baby," Jim said, sliding his arms around Blair from behind.  "Even if
you *do* drink raw sewage for breakfast."

     "Keep it up, Jim.  I hear blue balls is a really painful condition,"
Blair responded, going on about fixing the eggs, even with a giant
appendage hanging on his back.  

     "Ooh, you're on thin ice now, Ellison," Starsky needled, still
working on Hutch's leg, having reduced his grouchy partner to a
tranquil state, sprawled on the chair like a large, languid cat.  

     "Who else would I kiss with algae shake breath?"  Jim asked,
kissing Blair's cheek and squeezing him, effectively disabling him from
doing anything with the eggs.

     "You win.  Nobody."  Blair turned around and gave in to a long
kiss and a hug, before sending Jim on his way to finish the toast.  

     The four of them ate in relative silence, knowing there was
much to talk over, but not having the energy to do it then.  As they
finished the meal, Starsky pushed back and slumped in his chair a bit.

     "I owe you an apology," he said to Jim, who looked up from the
last couple bites of Blair's breakfast, which Blair had donated to his
still-hungry lover.  

     "For?"

     "For thinking you were a jerk who was led around by his dick
who had dumped Blair again for a round of beach blanket bingo with
what's-her-name."

     "If you thought that, why did you let him go in there alone?" 
Jim challenged.

     "Because he wasn't going to take no for an answer, and at least
this way, I knew what he was doing, and I had a fightin' chance of
helping him if things went wrong.  I knew he'd find a way to go no
matter what I said.  He had enough faith for both of us," Starsky added. 
"He said you'd save his life.  He never questioned it.  So I guess I have
to accept Blair's judgment where you're concerned."

     "If we're confessing impure thoughts here," Hutch added, "I had
a few doubts myself when I found out we were basing this whole
operation on Blair's assumption you'd show up."

     "Actually, you were the one who said 'led around by his dick',
weren't you?"  Starsky teased.

     "Thanks, Starsk, that was very helpful," Hutch retorted.  

     "Anytime, darlin'."  Starsky grinned innocently at his partner,
who had to laugh in spite of himself.  

     "I'm glad I finally passed the in-laws' inspection.  I was
beginning to think you were going to run me off with a shotgun," Jim
responded, chuckling.

     "It *did* cross my mind," Starsky said, sharing the laugh.  "So
behave yourself," he added, still smiling, though there was a definite
note of warning underlying the joke.

     "You can hang up your shotgun," Jim said, running his arm
along the back of Blair's chair, leaning in for another happily received
kiss.  

********
     
     "Leg feelin' better?"  Starsky asked as he washed Hutch's back
under the spray of the shower.  

     "Yeah, now it's just my head banging like a bass drum."

     "You got a pretty healthy lump back here.  Maybe you oughtta
get checked out."

     "If it's going to interfere with my sleep, I'd prefer to risk brain
damage," Hutch grumbled, leaning into the wash job that was turning
into a massage.  Then he felt Starsky's forehead against his back. 

     "I love you, Hutch."  The words were simple, a little strained,
and straight from the heart.  Hutch turned around and pulled his partner
into his arms.  "We're too far along for me t'loose ya now," Starsky
said, returning the wet embrace fiercely.

     "I'm here, babe.  You didn't lose me.  You're not going to,
either."  Hutch knew it was an empty promise, that no one could
control his own mortality--but if he could find a way to do it for
Starsky, he would.  He could feel a little tremor of tears from Starsky,
who clung impossibly tighter to him.  "Hey, it's over, babe.  We're all in
one piece."

     "I didn't think I was gonna get you back, and then there was this
point where I thought I'd handed Blair over to her..."

     "You let him make the judgment call about Ellison, and he was
right."

     "What if he hadn't been?"

     "He *was*, babe.  Don't do the 'what if' thing to yourself.  You
handled things right, and so did Blair, and Jim did his part, and it all
worked out."

     "Let's go to bed, huh?"  Starsky suggested, pulling back.

     "If you insist," Hutch responded, smiling.

     Finally showered and dried off, the two exhausted men crawled
into their bed, spooning together, lying there in silence a while, soaking
up the closeness.  

     "You think you can lay off Jim a little now," Hutch asked
affectionately, nuzzling Starsky's neck.

     "A little," Starsky responded, then chuckled.  "I think he really
loves Blair, and as long as he makes him happy and doesn't hurt him
again, he'll have no problems with me."  Starsky sighed tiredly, settling
in to sleep.  "I don't think he will."

     "I don't think so either.  I'm not sure I really get what this whole
Sentinel-psychic bond-mystical *thing* is, but I think it would be
fascinating to explore when our lives weren't at stake over it."

     "You and Blair can meditate on it tomorrow.  Meanwhile, I'll
take Ellison over to Luigi's."

     "Oh, now I get it.  You're not going to shoot him.  You're going
to kill him slowly by stuffing his arteries with lard," Hutch teased,
referring to the absurd layer of mozzarella Luigi's pizza boasted.  

     "More like rescuing him from another meal with pond scum
salad as a featured entree."

     "I guess if deadly pizza is the only common ground you can
find, far be it from me to interfere."  With that, Hutch yawned widely
and snuggled against Starsky's body.  "Love you, babe."

     "You too, darlin'," Starsky whispered back as he drifted off to
sleep.

*********

     After sharing a shower, Jim and Blair climbed into bed and then
moved into each other's arms.  Neither man had said much about their
experiences with Alex in the cave, but now Jim couldn't help but ask.

     "You knew I was coming to get you?" 

     "As sure as I know you're here now.  I just...knew.  There was
this pain in my head, and then it was like the knowledge was
just...*there*--I knew what we had to do, that we had to play along with
her, and that if we did, you'd save my life."

     "I think your dad saved your life, sweetheart.  I wish I could
have done that."

     "You came back for me, and...you *chose* me."  Blair pulled
back and looked up at Jim.  "That moment, knowing in my heart that
you were lying to her, knowing that you were there for me...I know it's
probably petty, but that moment alone was worth dying for."

     "I'll always choose you, angel.   You're my light, remember? 
Incacha told me to look for that, to follow it.  He was so right."  Jim
smiled, kissing the end of Blair's nose.  

     "I'm sorry I doubted you, that I...that I doubted what we have...I
just..."

     "You were hurt, and you were sick, honey.  You went through a
lot, all at once.  And what happened with Alex...I don't know if I really
can explain it.  At the time, it was compelling, like I had to be with her--
like I had no choice."

     "But when you saw her this time, it wasn't the same?"

     "Not at all.  There was nothing there.  The only way I found her
was by following the black jaguar--I saw him out the window yesterday
morning, and followed him to where she was holed up with that Emilio
character."  Jim frowned.  "I thought it was a little bizarre that she had
a lookout with binoculars, but I figured she probably just needed
someone to watch her back while she dealt with her hostages."

     "She lost her senses--they're back to normal again, no Sentinel
abilities.  That's probably why you weren't drawn to her anymore."

     "It wasn't that, sweetheart.  I knew what I wanted going in there. 
I wanted you, to save you, to have our life back.  I think the visions this
time were there to warn me about her.  I knew where my real bond
was, and I knew what I meant to you," Jim mumbled the last part, and
only their proximity allowed Blair to hear him.

     "You didn't know that before?"  Blair seemed incredulous.

     "I knew you loved me, but..."

     "But you needed me to choose you too," Blair said, running his
fingertips lightly over Jim's cheek.  

     "I didn't want to make you choose, and at the same time..."

     "You did."

     "Well, yeah."  Jim captured the hand near his face and kissed it,
holding it against his cheek.  "Can you forgive me for that?"

     "The only thing you need forgiving for is ever thinking it was
any contest.  You're my life Jim.  You know that."

     "But your Ph.D. is all you ever worked for or wanted."

     "It's what I've worked for, yeah, and I'll still get it.  Just not with
this dissertation.  But all I ever wanted was you.  I wanted *us*."  Blair
looked down.  "I guess I lost sight of that too.  I was so...psyched at
finding another Sentinel...I know I made you feel like the left over
research subject."  Blair looked up to see Jim's eyes closed, as if the
statement had physically struck him.

     "I thought I was going to lose you," he admitted.  "What made
me special to you...she had that, and she was beautiful..."

     "You thought *I'd* want *her*?"

     "You were hiding her from me.  I thought maybe..."  Jim
shrugged.  

     "Oh, man."  Blair flopped from his side onto his back, staring at
the ceiling.  "Oh, man," he repeated, shaking his head.  

     "I never thought you were unfaithful, Blair.  I just thought..." 
Jim swallowed, and looked away.

     "You were afraid I was going to leave you for her?"

     "I couldn't compete with her," Jim said honestly.

     "You don't have to compete with anybody, Jim."  Blair shifted
onto his side and took Jim's face in both hands.  "There is *no*
competition.  There's nobody out there I want besides you.  I don't care
how sexy or smart or wonderful they are, and I don't care if they've got
five heightened senses, ESP and can juggle flaming torches while
riding a unicycle," Blair said, and Jim had to laugh.  "Jim, I love *you*. 
What makes you special to me is the way you touch me, the way you
look at me, or smile at me, the way you love me--the way it feels to be
in your arms, the way everything's okay as long as I've got you--nobody
can step in for you.  Nobody can give me those things.  Only you.  I'm
not going to leave, and you don't have to compete with anybody for me. 
I'm yours, Jim.  Even when I came here by myself for a while, I was
still yours.  I still needed you every minute of every day I was away
from you."                              
     "I guess we needed a lot more faith in each other than we had,"
Jim said sadly.

     "It was kind of new...I mean, we had been with women before,
but not with another guy, and we were just getting started on a life
together, at least in the *big picture* of a lifetime.  You know, I look at
my dad and Hutch, and they've been through so much together, have so
much history...  We just got started compared to them, and then all this
happened...we had some unresolved *stuff* sitting there.  The diss
needed to be dealt with before we ever became lovers.  I just sort
of...froze there, not sure what to do with it.  I've worked on the Sentinel
subject so long that it just seemed...*unthinkable* to do anything else. 
Especially when I found out I was *right*, that they did exist."

     "I think the thing I feel worst about is that grant you told me
about, the one for that foundation that helps kids with problems?  God,
if something like that had been around when I was a kid, it would've
made all the difference in the world."

     "You know, I thought a lot about that since I lost the grant." 
Blair sighed.  "What worries me is that it would just lead to one
disaster after another.  Your dad had a point back then--not that you
were a freak, but that your life could be pretty miserable, and you could
end up exploited for your abilities.  If my research were validated, and I
started picking little Sentinels out of this group of special
kids...sometimes I'm afraid of what would happen to them.  I hate that
there might be a kid like you were out there, with real Sentinel abilities
and no one to help, but at the same time, am I doing them a favor or
exposing them to possible danger and exploitation by telling the world
what they can do?"

     "I suppose ultimately, ending up the way I did is better than
growing up like a lab rat, or worse--some kind of circus freak doing
parlor tricks."

     "Maybe there's some way I could work with those people
directly.  You know, leave my name with the foundation, even if they
don't want to give me research money, in case they want to refer people
to me as someone who's done research in the field.  I mean, if the
parents are ethical, maybe I could still help the kid, confidentially."

     "That's possible.  I honestly think if that kind of help had been
out there, my dad would have gone for it.  The more I get to know him
now, I think he was afraid of what would happen to me.  Going to a
therapist isn't even all that safe if you've got a kid with something
*different* about him.  I don't think he wanted me to end up in a
looney bin someplace."

     "I think when we get home, I'll get a hold of them, and let them
know that I'd be willing to share my research with the kids' families if
anybody wants to contact me."

     "You're pretty special, you know that?"  Jim said, smiling.

     "Yeah, I know," Blair responded, and Jim laughed.

     "You do, huh?"

     "I sure do.  You make me feel special every time you smile at
me like that," Blair said, hugging Jim tightly.  The embrace was
returned.  

     "Think maybe we should catch a nap?"  Jim said, pulling back
and kissing Blair's mouth lightly.

     "I'm really wiped, man," Blair admitted, snuggling into the big
arms around him.  

     "Thank you," Jim said quietly, whispering against Blair's ear.

     "For what?"

     "For having faith."

     "Thank *you*," Blair whispered back.

     "For what?"  Jim asked.

     "For proving me right."

********

     After much wrangling among a number of local, state, federal
and international law enforcement agencies, Alex Barnes was to be
tried in a federal court for her crimes, her mental state at the time of
her arrest showing no indication of mental illness.  Her Sentinel
abilities appeared to have vanished, and there was little hope of faking
catatonia after her recent activities.  All indications pointed to her
spending a long stretch, probably life, in a federal penitentiary.  

     Her accomplice, the ill-fated Emilio, had been an orderly at the
hospital in Sierra Verde.  Alex had charmed and seduced him shortly
before he helped her escape and accompanied her on her mission to
regain her extraordinary abilities.  Little had he known that her real
goal had been to reunite with Jim, hopefully permanently.  

     Planning to return to their home and their old life back in
Cascade, Jim and Blair went about the task of packing Blair's things--
with much greater care this time--to get him moved back into the loft. 
The festered old pick-up truck was sold locally for little less than Blair
paid for it, and his belongings were loaded into a rented trailer, to be
hauled behind a rented station wagon with the necessary trailer hitch.  

     "Room looks pretty barren," Starsky said, running his hand
along the desk that he'd brought up for Blair's use during his stay.

     "You knew he was going to go eventually, babe," Hutch said,
sharing a little of his partner's sadness at the sterile neatness of the
room that had been Blair's home for over a month now.  "It's going to
seem weird without him around anymore," Hutch admitted.

     "Hell, I even got used to Ellison being around.  At least I had
somebody on my side when we picked out restaurants," he teased,
smiling a little.

     "We're going there for the ceremony in a couple weeks."

     "Yeah, I know."

     "We better head back out front.  They're getting ready to take
off."  

     "Right," Starsky agreed, following his partner out to the
driveway, where Jim and Blair were securing the back door of the
small utility trailer.  "Got everything?"  Starsky asked Blair, who
nodded.

     "Goodbyes really suck, man," Blair said, leaning against the
back of the trailer.  Jim went back into the house to make a final sweep
of the bedroom.

     "We're comin' out to see you in about ten days or so," Starsky
added, using Hutch's tactic to shake Blair out of his funk.

     "I really appreciate what you guys did for me.  When I got
here...I was really messed up, and you were there for me..."

     "That's what family's for, Blair," Hutch said.  "It's where you go
when you're messed up."

     "Thanks for everything, Hutch--and I don't just mean the laptop--
even though that's the most amazingly awesome and spectacular piece
of equipment on the *planet*-- but you were really there for me, just
like my dad was.  Thanks for making me feel like family."  Blair
moved toward Hutch and the two of them embraced briefly.

     "We *are* family, Blair.  We have this character in common,"
Hutch nudged Starsky.

     "I think we've got everything, Chief," Jim said, rejoining the
group outside.

     "I guess this is it."  Blair looked at his father, who pulled him
into a bone-crushing hug.  

     "I'm glad things worked out for you, kiddo, but it was great
havin' you with us for while," he said.

     "I'm gonna miss you guys."

     "Only for a couple weeks.  Then we'll come and camp out at
your place for a while--well, at least until you tie the knot, then we'll
know enough to go home."  Starsky backed away, then took a hold of
Blair's chin.  "Make him eat, will ya?"  he said to Jim, who moved
closer to Blair and rested his hands on his shoulders.  

     "I'm working on it."

     "We had kind of a rough start this visit, but I'm glad things
worked out between you two," Starsky said to Jim.  "Be good to my
kid," he added, smiling and holding out his hand toward Jim, who
shook it, with a smile of his own.

     "My pleasure," he added, sliding his other arm around Blair,
pulling him against his side.  "Hutch, it's been real," he said, laughing a
little as he held out his hand, and Hutch shook it.

     "Maybe next time we get together, we can avoid one of us being
abducted before we finish the visit," he responded, laughing.

     "We still need to talk about the task force," Starsky added.  "I
want you to meet with the guy who coordinates it, if you're interested. 
I think you could be a real asset to the team.  With Blair's help, of
course."

     "I'm interested.  I think we both are," he said, looking to Blair,
who nodded in confirmation.  "Maybe after Blair and I make it official,
and we've had a little time to get back to work in Cascade, we could
arrange another visit out here for us to meet with him."

     "Sounds great.  Plus, planes travel both ways.  He's got an
expense account, so I reckon he could head North."  

     "If he's got an expense account, he can come to us," Jim said,
chuckling.  

     "You guys better get moving if you want to make it home
before you hit rush hour traffic back in Washington," Hutch suggested.

     "You're right," Jim concurred.  "Ready to go home, Chief?"

     "Oh, yeah, I'm ready, Jim."  He made one more beeline to
Starsky for a quick hug, then did the same with Hutch.  "Thanks, guys. 
I couldn't've gotten my head together with you--both of you."

     "Anytime you need us, just pick up the phone," Starsky said,
then, looking at Jim, added, "either one of you."  He extended a hand
toward Jim, and though they'd said their goodbyes, Jim realized the
symbolism and the fence-mending in the gesture, and shook hands with
Starsky.

     "Thanks," Jim responded, stepping back and heading toward the
car.  After Blair and he were both inside, Blair put the window down
on his side, where his father and Hutch still stood.  

     "Have a safe trip back," Starsky said, moving away from the car
a little.  "Call us when you get home."

     "We will.  I can even e-mail you both on my new laptop," Blair
added, and Hutch chuckled at that.  
     
     "Enjoy it, Blair.  Take care of yourself, huh?"  

     "I will."

     "Jim, talk to Banks about the task force thing, huh?"  Starsky
said, looking in the open window.

     "Soon as I get back on duty.  Take care, guys."  Jim started up
the engine, and with some final waves and farewells, the two of them
were on their way down the road toward home.

     "Weird.  Now I know how kids feel when they leave home,"
Blair said, smiling a little sadly.  "Like it's great to be starting out, but
sad for what you leave behind.  Too bad you can't have both, isn't it?"

     "You left for college."

     "Yeah, but that was different.  My mom travelled a lot, and we
weren't exactly a settled, domestic-type family unit.  We spent quite a
few summers or vacations separately."

     "The task force could be interesting work."

     "I hope it works out.  I think it would be great to get involved in
those high-priority cases--all those departments working
together...sounds terrific."

     "I think you could be a big help to them in coordinating things. 
It's got to be a challenge to coordinate all those departments working
together smoothly.  You're good at 'massaging' people's staffs."

     "Don't let Simon here you say that," Blair responded, laughing.  

     "Blair."  Jim's serious tone made Blair turn to look at him.  Jim
stole a glance away from the road.  "I love you."  He took a hold of
Blair's hand, lacing their fingers.  Then his gaze returned to the road,
even though he pulled the hand up to his mouth and kissed the back of
it.  

     "I love you too," Blair responded, grinning broadly.  

     "So, about this wedding thing...I figure we should start picking
out a place to have it, someone to cater it, all that stuff.  I was thinking
that big back room in WonderBurger where they have all the kids'
birthday parties could work."

     "You know, it's gonna be a little anti-climatic getting married if
the groom isn't there."

     "Oh, you've decided to be the groom, huh?"  Jim teased.  

     "I think you'd look pretty sexy in white lace and heels."

     "Either one of us wearing something that implied purity would
be a little bit of a stretch, don't you think?"

     "Probably.  I just wanna see you take your garter off and throw
it to our friends."

     "As soon as you throw your bouquet."

     "Hey, you're the bride in this scenario," Blair said.

     "If I have to throw a garter, you're throwing the bouquet, Chief."

     "I suppose that'd be a fair trade."  Blair nodded, then grinned
evilly.  "If you'll wear a garter, I'll carry a bouquet."  The devilish glint
in Blair's eyes made Jim laugh out loud.

     "It's a deal, Chief." 

********
THE END