THE BOY NAMED SU STORY

Once upon a time there was a running back named SU. The story goes that, as a baby, he was named SU by his parents because they knew their son would have to become street smart and mentally tough to survive growing up with a name like SU.

Well SU did become mentally tough and actually became a star running back on his High School football team. When it came time for him to go to college, the sky was the limit, as he had offers from all the top Universities. In a major shocker, SU surprised and disappointed his parents by selecting University of Alabama as the school he would attend and play football for.

Like I said, this was a major surprise since SU was very smart and the sum intelligence of the average Bammer fan is approximately the equivalent of a guest on the Jerry Springer Show. In any event, SU went to Bammer and promptly gained notoriety for being the only Bammer football player in history to have his entire full name embroidered on the back of his football jersey.

Well, you would have thought that SU was the best running back in the world when he signed with Bammer. The Bammers bragged about how great he was. They bragged that he would be the starter when he arrived on campus. They bragged that he would win the Heisman Trophy. Oh yeah, they bragged about how fast he was too.

I have to admit that SU was definitely a good running back at Bammer, but he was a long way from a great running back during his first two years at the Crapstone. SU was basically the third string running back at Bammer during his Freshman and Sophomore years, mainly getting into the games late in the fourth quarter and running against tired defenses.

During his Junior year, SU finally became the starter. SU was a pretty good running back that year. He was big, he was smart and he was mentally tough (remember he grew up with the name SU). However, there was only one thing that SU wasn't good at - taking hits! In fact, SU hated to get hit! He hated it so much that he would often slip in and hide behind his Offensive Linemen and then slide away from the would-be tackler at the last minute. For this, some people called him Ole Slip & Slide.

However, there are times when a running back is in open field and there is nowhere to hide from the oncoming defense. SU, being the intelligent person that he was, figured out that the defense can't hit you if you're already down. So during the Arkansas game in his Junior year SU unveiled, what has now become known as, his famous "diveman" move.

Prior to SU's Senior year, the Bammers were hyping SU for the famous Heisman trophy. The Bammers even set up a special InterNet site just to promote SU for the Heisman. Actually SU had a pretty decent Senior year. He used his patented "slip and slide" and "diveman" moves in all the Bammer games to keep from getting hit. As the season progressed, it became obvious that SU was not Heisman Trophy material. However, that didn't deter ole SU from showing off his patented "diveman" move each week!

SU was a model citizen both on and off the field. You might way that he was a role model. In fact, he was such a good role model that all the other Bammer players strived to be just like SU.

Sure enough, the boy named SU took Bammer all the way to the SEC championship and a birth in the Orange Bowl. Even though SU did not win the Heisman, SU's efforts were rewarded as he become the only running back in Bammer history to receive the Diveman Trophy!

How good of a player was ole SU you ask? Well let's put it this way. SU demonstrated his talents so well at Bammer, that most pro scouts are adamant that SU will have a successful career in the professional ranks. I for one, think he will be a high draft pick in the pros, once the scouts see his patented "diveman" move.

THE END

OR JUST THE BEGINNING?!?!?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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