It has come to the attention of Microsoft that several copies of a Geordie version of Windows 2000, otherwise known as Windaz Too Thoosand, may have accidentally been shipped out of Newcastle. If you have one of the Newcastle editions, you may need some help understanding the commands. You will be able to tell immediately if you have a copy of Windaz 2000 by the egg-timer being replaced by a bottle of Brown Ale. Also note: The recycle bin is labelled "Shite" Dialup network is called "Me mates" Control Panel is known as "How we fook aboot wi the settins" The hard drive is referred to as "Big disk wi aall me stuff on it" Other features to note: Ok - Alreet Cancel - Fook that Yes - Aye No - Nee fookin chance Goto - Owa there Help - Ah cannit dee it Personal folder/My Documents - Me shite Windaz 2000 does not recognise capital letters or punctuation marks. Applications exclusive to Windaz 2000 Tipe Rita - a word processor Cullarin book - a graphics package Addin masheen - a calculator Dole 2000 - accounting software Porn - Internet Explorer