I don't remember much from the place I was born.  It was

cramped & dark, and we were never played with by humans.

 I remember Mom and her soft  fur, but she was often sick,

and very thin.  She had hardly any milk for me & my

brothers &  sisters.  I remember many of them dying, and

I missed them so.   I do remember the day I was taken from Mom.

I was so sad & scared; my milk teeth had only just come in,

and I really should have been with Mom still, but she was

so sick, and the humans kept saying that they wanted

money and were sick of the "mess" that me & my sister made. 

So we were crated up and taken to a strange place... just

the two of us.  We huddled together & were scared; 

still no human hands came to pet or love us.

So many sights, sounds, and smells!  We are in a store where

there are many different animals!  Some that squawk!

Some that meow!   Some that peep!  My sister and I are jammed

into a small cage;  I hear other puppies here.  I see humans

look at me.  I like the "little humans"- the kids.

They look so sweet and fun, like they would play with me!

All day we stay in the small cage; sometimes mean people

will hit the glass and frighten us, and every once in a while, 

we are taken out to be held or shown to humans.

Some are gentle, some hurt us... we always hear "Oh,

they are so cute!  I want one!"  ...but we never get to go with

any of them.  My sister died last night, when the

store was dark.  I laid my head on her soft fur and felt the life

leave her small thin body.   I had heard them say she

was sick, and that I should be sold at a "discount price"

so that I would quickly leave the store.  I think my soft whine was

the only one that mourned for her as her body was taken

out of the cage in the morning and dumped.

Today, a family came and bought me!  Oh happy day! 

They are a nice family; they really, really wanted me!  They had

bought a dish & food, and the little girl held me so tenderly in her

arms.  I love her so much!  The mom & dad say what a sweet

and good puppy I am!   I am named Angel.  I love to lick my

new humans!  The family takes such good care of me... 

They are loving & tender & sweet.  They gently teach me right

and wrong, give me good food, and lots of love!  I want only to

please these wonderful people!  I love the little girl and I enjoy

running & playing with her.  Today I went to the veterinarian. 

It was a strange place, and I was frightened.   I got some shots,

but my best friend, the little girl held me close & said it would be

OK, so I relaxed.  The vet must have said sad words to my

beloved family, because they looked awfully sad.   I heard

"severe hip displasia", & something about my heart... 

I heard the vet say something about backyard breeders, and

my parents not being tested.  I don't know what any of that

means,  just that it hurts me to see my family so

sad.   But they still love me, and I still love them very much!

I am 6 months old now.  Where most other puppies

are robust and rowdy, it hurts me terribly just to move.  The pain

never lets up. It hurts to run & play with my beloved little girl,

and I find it hard to breathe.  I keep trying my best to be

the strong pup I know I am supposed to be, but it is so hard.

It breaks my heart to see the little girl so sad,

and to hear the Mom & Dad talk about 

"...it might now be the time".   Several times I have gone to

that veterinarians place, and the news is never good. 

They always talk about "congenital problems".  I just want to feel

the warm sunshine, and run & play & nuzzle with my family.

Last night was the worst... pain has been my constant companion now.

It hurts even to get up & get a drink.  I try to get up, 

but can only whine in pain.   I am taken in the car one last time.

Everyone is so sad, and I don't know why.  Have I been bad?

I try to be good & loving... what have I done wrong?

Oh, if only this pain would be gone!  If only I could soothe the tears

of the little girl.  I reach out my muzzle to lick her hand,

but can only whine in pain.

The veterinarian's table is so cold. I am so frightened. 

The humans all hug & love me; they cry into my soft fur. 

I can feel their love and sadness.   I manage to lick gently their hands.

Even the vet doesn't seem so scary today.

He is gentle, and I sense some  kind of relief from my pain.

The little girl holds me tenderly, and in my heart, I thank her

for giving me all her love.  I feel a little pinch in my foreleg.

The pain is beginning to lift... I am beginning to feel

a peace descend upon me.   I can now gently lick her hand...

My vision is  becoming dreamlike now, and I see mother and

my brothers & sisters in a far off green place.  They tell me

there is no pain there - only peace & happiness.  I tell the family

good-bye in the only way I know how, a gentle wag of my tail and a

nuzzle of my nose.  I had hoped to spend many, many moons

with them, but it was not meant to be.  "You see," said the

veterinarian, "...pet shop puppies do not come from ethical breeders."

The pain ends now, & I know it will be many years until I see my

beloved family again.   If only things could have been different....