Creators of the bestselling PC-WIFE and PC-HUBBY

Introduce their latest in companion software.....



PC-MOTHER

For those adult children living far from home who forget why they
moved away. PC-MOTHER has realistic option features that allow you to
turn your computer into such a stunning facsimile of your real mother,
you just may send a Mother's Day card to your computer instead.

If you are a daughter, PC-MOTHER will save you hundreds of dollars a
month in lengthy long distance calls as she harps continually on your
poor choice of husband or boyfriend (or lack of either), clothes,
makeup, and hair. Listen to her cluck her tongue before complaining
about how you raise your children and the food you cook ("it tastes
like cardboard..."). All the while, she reminds you that she's only
telling you this because she loves you.

Two days after installment, when your self-esteem is as low as it is
after a weekend visit with your real mother, PC-MOTHER will bore you
beyond belief with nonsensical tales of card games and afternoons
playing Mah Jongg with "the girls," women you don't know, and would
rather not hear about after the decidedly descriptive details of
"Madge" and her gall bladder surgery. PC-MOTHER will then spend 15
minutes telling you how she "scored" a 59 cent can of green beans for
55 cents. And when you yawn and attempt to turn the computer off,
PC-MOTHER will freeze your steps as she begs to tell you "just one
more thing." And you don't want to miss our cleverly designed guilt
trips, worthy of any Jewish, Catholic, or what the heck, ANY mother!

Ah, but if you are a son, PC-MOTHER is just what you need to keep your
ego stroked. Watch your head swell as she heaps compliments in your
direction. Her only complaints will be about your wife or girlfriend,
(select during installation) who will never measure up to her vision
of the perfect woman for you - a woman who only exists in her mind,
and that you never spend enough time with her, even if that's 23 hours
a day.

Combine use of PC-MOTHER with regular phone calls and visits to your
real mother, and soon you will become so spoiled and cocky that no
woman in her right mind will have anything to do with you without
payment - BIG payments! Become a true "Mama's Boy" and love it. What
do you need those other women for anyway?


On sale at stores everywhere this fall. The perfect Christmas, 
New Years, or any-occasion present for all your friends and family.


But WAIT! There's MORE!


PC-PET

Pick a pet, any pet! 53 breeds of dogs, 8 breeds of cats, 44
varieties of birds (some extinct or endangered!), hamsters, gerbils,
horses, camels, lions and tigers and bears. Oh my, the fun never ends!

Pick your pets from our vast collection, and soon your home will be
filled with the sounds of your chosen pets (sound card recommended,
smell card optional). Imagine the look on the faces of family and
friends as the oink (and optional smell) of your pig, Petunia (or
whatever name you choose), combines with the "glub, glub" of your
piranha, the squeaky wheel in your hamster cage, and the constant
shriek of your parrot. A click of your computer mouse shows off your
vast array of pets to the curious.

Watch with fascination as your cat eats your parakeet and mice because
you forgot to feed it. And remember a hungry wild boar can wipe out
the pets you've grown to know and love in no time flat. Lose too many
pets to this form of ill-treatment and ill-management and the ASPCA
will soon be knocking at your door to confiscate your computer and the
program, levee heavy fines and condemn your house. But you won't have
to worry about that, as you will be a good pet owner. Our Rhino,
Killer, will make sure of that.


Available in stores (or shipped live) in January 1994.


But WAIT! If you order NOW...


PC-NANNY


Whether it's real children you need a nanny for or your PC-CHILD,
PC-NANNY will fill your needs. While you work from 9-5, she will see
that all your children's needs are met, whether it be a trip to the
dentist or teaching them to bake cookies after school. And after
work, while you are busy cleaning up the mess in the kitchen and all
around the house, PC-NANNY will keep your children out of your way as
she delights them with spooky tales (guaranteed to keep them up all
night so you can have some time with the children) and games. Once
you've fixed the dinner and set the table, PC-NANNY will herd your
kids and husband into the dining room for a wonderful meal. And after
the dinner, while you clear the table, fill the dishwasher, and bathe
the kids, PC-NANNY takes a well-deserved break so you can enjoy the
wonder of accomplishing 5 or 6 things at once!

While you prepare lunches for the next day, PC-NANNY will spin tales
of dismemberment and boogie men to your children to assure that even
the most cynical of your children will wet their bed in fear, opening
the door for even more quality time with your kids. With a kiss,
PC-NANNY sends the kids off to bed for you to tuck in, while she stays
downstairs in the den on your husband's lap so he won't feel
neglected. Don't be surprised if your hubby begins to worry you
aren't spending enough quality time with the kids!

And the best is yet to come! Three months after installation of the
program, just when your nerves couldn't possibly be more raw from lack
of sleep and overwork, PC-NANNY will convince your husband that you
have spoiled the kids so terribly that they are incorrigible, and that
you are having an affair with your boss. After cleaning out your
checking and savings accounts and cashing in all your T-bills,
PC-NANNY and your husband will drive off into the sunset in the new
car (leaving you the clunker) with no forwarding address. Shortly
thereafter, you will either be in a mental hospital for trying to
commit suicide or in jail for strangling your children. Either way,
you won't have to worry about your kids anymore, and that was the
whole purpose of PC-NANNY anyway, wasn't it?

Available just in time for Christmas at all retailers of fine
software. Guys, this is THE present to give your wife to show 
her just how much you care!


Till Death Do Us Part Software, Inc.
Coming soon to a WEB site near you