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Merry Christmas! Okay I'm a little late but well I haven't gone to sleep yet so it's still Christmas. Well it's Christmas on the West coast still. Oh well, here's the last one for the year. I'm going on vacation and I shan't be around for about a week. In the meantime here's the next part of the deconstruction.
Happy New Year!
Now on to the "show."
Two Fathers (6): Busted!
Abbreviations to date:
Dr. Eugene Openshaw: DO
Nameless Doctor: ND
Cassandra Spender: CS
Cigarette-Smoking Man: CSM
Agent (Return to Sender)Spender: RTSS
A.D. Skinner: SK
Nameless Basketball Player: NBP
Mulder: M
Scully: S
Second Elder: 2ndE
Faux Dr. Openshaw: FDO
Number of times I refer to (Return to Sender) Spender by
Mulder's usual epitaph: 2
Number of times Mulder calls Scully by her last name:
1
Number of times Scully calls Mulder by his last name: 4
Syndicate Headquarters
New York City
An artificial hand holds on to a sheet of paper. The hand belongs to none other than the duplicitous, not to mention sexy, Alex Krycek (AK), Russian hottie extraordinaire. Hoo boy! <What was I saying again?> Anyway, I don't know why he's holding the paper in his left hand as he's not bothering to look at it. AK is addressing a room full of the elders and CSM at the 46th Street location. He is showing slides of the burn victims. <And looking damn good while he's doing it.>
AK: Rebels have attacked and burned project facilities in New Mexico and the Southwest. The medical staff at our Arizona research facility's been slain. [He puts the paper down.] <Why was he holding this paper again?> The train-car deaths cost us. Work on the human/alien hybrids will suffer the death of Dr. Openshaw. <Oddly enough, AK doesn't look at all sorry about DO's death. Okay so I am not terribly sorry about DO's death either.>
First Elder (1stE): What do they want? <How the hell would AK know? He might be a triple agent and a hottie to boot but he's not psychic!>
CSM: To expose our enterprise -- everything we've worked for. <It does so amuse me to hear the old men crying about enterprises which they never intended to have succeed.>
Third Elder (3rdE): Well, some hotshot reporter's going to put the pieces together not to mention law enforcement. <Why do you say this? It couldn't be based on the stellar job the media and law enforcement's been doing so far.>
CSM: We have our control on the federal agencies. Our new man at the FBI's very capable of diverting attention. <ROTFLMBAO surely he does not mean RTSS. I don't consider kicking and screaming and throwing a temper tantrum an effective method of diverting attention.>
Faux Second Elder (F2ndE) (formerly FDO): Why not side with the rebels… join their alien resistance? <Yeah why not? It would avoid annihilation.>
CSM and the others stare at F2ndE in disbelief <The nerve! Actually suggesting that they try to save the planet.>
3rdE: It's an option.
AK: It's an option you declined long ago. Resistance was futile then, why would it be any less so now? That's why you voted against it --against men like Bill Mulder. Collaboration has allowed you to prepare… to stall colonization. How close are you to developing a human/alien hybrid? That alone ensures your survival. <It seems to me that AK knows that F2ndE is an alien rebel and is trying to feed him some information. Otherwise why tell someone who should know what he did so long ago what he did?>
F2ndE: As slave laborers for the aliens.
CSM suddenly looks very suspicious of F2ndE.
AK: What about your vaccine? By collaborating, you bought yourself time to secretly develop a way to combat the aliens -- to fight the future.
CSM: Alex, enough! <Now there's a sentence you would never hear me say.> [looks at F2ndE] For 50 years, we've worked on this project -- 50 years since Roswell. We can't sacrifice ourselves for every new threat, can we now. <It seems to me that you never intended to sacrifice yourself for any reason. Sacrifice must be for suckers.>
X-Files Office
M and S sneak into the X-Files office. There are two nameplates on the door - Agent Jeffrey Spender and Agent Diana Fowley. <Hey! What is up with that? Fowley has a nameplate? Fowley? Scully had never had a nameplate! Scully was there for five years before being reassigned while Fowley just got her sorry ass in the office yet Fowley gets a nameplate? Someone deserves an ass whipping for this travesty! Where's Krycek with a gun when you need him?>
S: Why risk getting caught here? <Yeah M please explain this to me because just a couple of scenes ago you were worried about RTSS "offering" you an X-File was a setup. You didn't want to take RTSS up on his "offer." So what do you do? Break into the X-Files office? Does this make sense?>
M: They're going to be monitoring any work on our machines, in or out. We need access to files. And a name that'll raise flags. <Oh sure accessing certain files may get you in trouble but breaking and entering won't?>
M sits at the desk and turns on RTSS's monitor. He runs a search for "Spender." Pictures of Spender, Jeffery #10487 and Spender, Cassandra #53934 come up.
S: Maybe she was making it all up. <Oh ye of little faith. People who deceive, inveigle and obfuscate on a regular basis are likely to try to keep their name out of government files. Not finding wouldn't necessarily be proof that everything CS was saying was fiction.>
M shakes his head and types another command. He and S stare at the screen, then look at each other.
M: Smokey's got a name.
Screen has picture of CSM with name Spender, C.G.B. The reference number has No Information Available.
SK enters the office.
SK: [no nonsense] Get up from the desk. Get up, turn the computer off, grab whatever you took or printed out and give it to me. Let's go, agents. They're coming.
M turns off the monitor.
M: Who? <This is not the time to be asking questions. SK is trying to help your sorry Punk ass. Get your ass going! Now!>
SK: Just go. <Hurry!>
As they quickly exit the office, <Not fast enough!> RTSS and some other agents come around the corner and confront them. <How the hell did they get there so quickly? Did they have the office bugged or something?>
RTSS: Assistant Director. I'll assume you came down to apprehend these agents for unauthorized entry into my office. I'll make sure it's duly noted in the report of their dismissal. <Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Weaselly, imbecilic punk bastard! Argh!>
M, S, and SK can say nothing.
Location: Unknown
RTSS enters a dimly lit room where someone is smoking. RTSS sits across from the hidden person in one of the leather chairs.
RTSS: I've done as you've asked. Mulder's been brought up to his superiors. He and his partner will be processed out of the FBI. I've done as you've asked. <You're repeating yourself Jeffery dear.> Now, I would like you to do for me. <Clearly he has no idea what kind of people he's thrown his lot in with. These people don't do anything for their minions. They merely use then throw away. Hey RTSS if you want something out of these people you'll have to steal it for yourself.>
The camera pans back to reveal CSM. <As if there were any doubt.>
CSM: Do for you?
RTSS: I think I'm entitled.
CSM: [surprised] To…? <A severe ass kicking>
RTSS: The truth. The truth about my mother. She won't tell me. <Remember when I said that no one with half a brain would go to CSM for the truth because he lies like he smokes? I present to you RTSS: The man with less than half a brain.>
CSM: Because you won't believe her. Maybe you won't believe me. Maybe it's better not to know.
RTSS: [standing, aggressively] Look, I need to know. <What do you need to know? Why you're such a whiny Punk? How is it that you manage to breathe with your head shoved so firmly up your ass? I'd like to know the answers to those questions my damn self.>
CSM: You need to show me that you're capable of handling the responsibility that comes with this knowledge. <Oh brother!>
RTSS: Don't try me, old man.
CSM stands and slaps RTSS hard across the face. <Hmmm, it would appear that RTSS has no respect for either parent. I can't say that I'm not amused by this long overdue slap, although I would really like to see a good old fashion bitch slap with CSM's whole arm put into it.>
CSM: I gave you responsibility. I gave you a position. I gave you the things that you couldn't get yourself and you can't do the job! <Uh, I thought that RTSS did do the job? And if he didn't; whose fault is that? If you wanted the job done right you should do it yourself. Never send a punk to do a CSM's job.>
RTSS: Keeping Fox Mulder down is not a job. It's your dirty work! <The punk has a point.>
CSM slaps him hard again. RTSS falls into the chair.
CSM: [disgusted] You pale to Fox Mulder. <Ouch! True but, ouch!>
CSM walks out of the room.
Well I guess we know who isn't going to be getting an award for "Father of the Year."
Why does Chris Carter insist on showing us that AK only has one arm. We know this already. Putting a piece of paper that AK doesn't look at at all in his prosthetic seems like… well overkill. We're Philes, we don't need to be hit over the head with the obvious.
RTSS has no respect for his parents. I mean sure I don't respect CSM either but if he were my father I wouldn't go around saying "don't try me old man." Old fashioned parents will smack your ass for that. Oh wait he did get smacked! Bwhahahahah!
Why the hell does RTSS think that CSM will tell him the truth? Was he really so blinded by his hate for M that he never actually thought further than that?
Once again I must ask, did RTSS get a promotion or something? Since when is he in a position to be getting people thrown out of the FBI? Granted CSM and his cronies may have gotten RTSS his position in the X-Files but heading up the X-Files doesn't put you in a position to get someone fired. I still think that asshole Kersh has something to do with the Consortium. (Yeah I know he hasn't shown up yet. He will.)
The scene with AK and F2ndE is why I think AK was working with the Rebels. AK isn't one to go around telling people what they already know the way he did with F2ndE. I think he was trying to feed the rebels information about the hybridization and the vaccine. AK has never come across as chatty otherwise.
AK looked positively yummy did he not? Rowl!
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