Willow walked around
her room gathering some stuff up and putting it in a bag. Her life was
in shambles and she needed to get away so she could reflect on everything
from a distance. As she packed, she thought about the events of the
past few days. Oz and Cordelia had caught she and Xander kissing
and Oz had not spoken to her since. She and Xander had a long conversation
and decided what they had done was wrong. It was just a case of wanting
what you can not have. Willow had loved Xander for so long, too long
and he had never given her a second look. Then when she almost died
he realized that he loved her, but she had moved on to Oz. Then at
Homecoming, something happened and she and Xander shared that kiss and
everything went downhill from there. Willow still cringed when she
thought of the look on Oz’s face when he and Cordelia had caught Willow
and Xander kissing in the factory.
She had tried
everything to talk to Oz after, but he was avoiding her like the plague.
Who could blame him though? Willow knew how much she hurt him.
He had been so patient with her, waiting until he thought she was over
Xander. This was the ultimate betrayal. She finished packing
her suitcase and headed over to Buffy’s. Her parents were away for
two weeks anyway so they would not even notice, but she could not leave
without telling Buffy. She knew how much pain it had caused when
Buffy just disappeared and she could not do that to her friends.
“Hi Will.
What’s with the suitcase?” Buffy asked. “Getting tired of being home
alone?”
“I’m leaving.”
Willow stated quietly. “I just have to get away for a few days.
I made reservations at a hotel and I am just going. I need to be
away from here and figure out why my life is so screwed up. I just
couldn’t leave without telling you. I also need you to do me a favor,
I need you to give these to Oz, Xander and Cordelia.” With that she
handed three envelopes to Buffy and waited for her response.
Buffy was
in shock. She knew that Willow was taking this really hard, but she
never thought she would leave. She took the letters from Willow and
sighed.
“I know I
can’t stop you. That would be sorta hypocritical. I understand
what it feels like to need to get away. Can you tell me where you
are going? When you will be back? How I can get in touch with
you if I need to?”
“I am going
to go to San Francisco. I’ll be back in a few days. I took
my Dad’s pager and I can give you the number.” Willow quickly grabbed
a pen and paper and wrote the number down. “I just need to get going.”
And with that, she turned to leave.
“Wait,” Buffy
said, “Can I walk you to the bus station?”
“I don’t
think so. Don’t you have training or something? I just need
to do this alone. I just couldn’t leave without telling you.
Bye.” And with that Willow turned and walked out of the Summer’s
house.
Buffy just
stood in the doorway watching her best friend walking away. She wanted
so much to not let her go, but it was something Willow had to do.
Buffy sighed and closed the door. She walked miserably up to her
room. She had a meeting with Giles in about an hour, some new threat
or something. Everyone was supposed to be there.
An hour later
Buffy walked sadly into the library. She saw Xander sitting at one
table and Oz and Cordelia at another. Things had been so awful since
Spike had kidnapped Willow and Xander and the two of them had been caught
kissing. Oz and Cordelia still helped with Slayer stuff, but they
wouldn’t even acknowledge that Xander and Willow were in the same room.
Buffy sighed and dropped her bag on the table and walked over to her punching
bag. She had some definite aggression to get out before she talked
to the three of them. She launched into several different attacks
against the bag, hoping that she could tire herself out enough that when
she did tell them she was too exhausted to yell at them like she wanted
to. Just as she was about to break the bag in two Giles walked out
of his office. He looked around the room for a moment, then spoke.
“Uhm, Buffy,
weren’t you supposed to pick up Willow?” he asked.
“She’s gone,”
Buffy stated. She glared over at the other three people in the room.
She walked over to her bag and got out the letters that Willow had given
her. “She told me to give these to you.” Buffy then threw the
letters at the respective people they belonged to and sat down.
Oz, Cordelia
and Xander all sat stunned for a moment then opened their letters and read
them.
@@@@@
Dear Cordelia,
I am sorry. I know that that
doesn’t make anything better, but I am. I never meant for this to
happen. I guess I just had wanted Xander for so long, that when he
actually showed an interest in me, I didn’t know what to do. I know
that is no excuse and I wouldn't blame you if you hated me forever, I know
I will.
Willow
@@@@@
Dear Xander,
What we did was wrong. I just
don’t know how to deal with it. I have never hurt anyone before.
I spent so many years wanting you that when you finally showed interest
I did the stupidest thing I could. I love Oz and I always will.
I know now that you love me as a friend, nothing more. What we felt
was hormones. In fact, the only reason, I think, that you showed
interest in me to begin with was the fact that I was finally moving on
from you. You always want what you can’t have. You wanted Buffy
and she liked Angel. You wanted Cordelia and she hated you.
You wanted me because you thought you were losing me. Goodbye.
Your best friend,
Willow
@@@@@
Oz,
My hands are shaking just writing
this. I am so sorry. I would do anything to have this never
happen. I was stupid. I love you. When Xander kissed
me, it brought back all those emotions of spending over a decade wanting
him and it never being reciprocated. I know I hurt you and have no
right to expect you to forgive me. I will leave you alone if that
is what you want. I just want you to know that I love you now and
forever and I am sorry.
Love,
Willow
@@@@@
After each
of them put their letters down Giles spoke up.
“Willow
is gone where?”
“I’m not
supposed to say. She stopped by my house an hour ago with her suitcase
and said she was leaving for a while. She needed to get away from
Sunnydale and figure out what to do with her life.”
“This is
not good,” Giles said. “I asked for all of you to be here for a reason.
I have found a new prophecy that affects Willow. We have to get in
touch with her.”
“What kind
of prophecy?” Oz asked. He couldn’t mask the concern in his voice.
Through all this, he still loved Willow and he was well on his way to forgiving
her. He just never thought she’d leave.
“Well, from
what I have been able to decipher there is a demon who will seek out Willow
as a sacrifice to release on unholy power on this world.”
“How do you
know it is Willow?” Xander asked.
“The prophesy
says that the Slayer’s witch will be taken and sacrificed on the new moon
and from her body shall open the forces of hell on this world. Willow
is the only witch among us. The new moon is in 3 days.”
“Cordelia
we need your car,” Buffy said. “We’re going on a road trip.”
“Where to?”
Cordy asked.
“She told
me she was going to San Francisco. She has her Dad’s pager so once
we get there we can page her and find out where exactly she is. Giles,
does it happen to say anything about where this ritual has to take place?”
“Hmm, not
specifically. But I’m sure the demon will be able to find her no
matter where she is so you had better hurry. I’ll stay here and keep
researching. Call me when you get there.”
“Okay, lets
go,” Buffy said. “We’ll stop by everyone’s house and grab some clothes
and everyone grab a weapon on the way out of the library.”
Buffy headed
for the door without looking back. Everyone quickly grabbed a weapon
and followed. They all got into Cordy’s car in silence and stopped
by everyone’s house to get some stuff then off they went. Each person
lost in his or her own thoughts.
Xander was
thinking about how this was all his fault. He kissed Willow then
kept pushing her while she was trying to pull away from the situation.
Hell, she had been willing to try a de-lusting spell to stop him.
If anything happened to her Xander didn’t know what he would do.
Cordy’s mind
was jumping around. She was so mad at Willow and Xander, but she
loved Xander. She also liked Willow. This situation was new
to her. She had never let someone have this much control over her
emotions like Xander does. She knew how much this was hurting him
and she wanted more then anything to comfort him, but she wasn’t sure she
could.
Buffy was
in shock. She logically knew that this wasn’t her fault, she
could not have known about the prophecy. But at the same time, she
had let Willow go. Willow was her best friend, someone who was always
there for her no matter what and she now had to be there for Willow.
Oz didn’t
know what to think. He had been planning to talk to Willow after
the meeting this morning. He had wanted to tell her that he wanted
to work toward getting their relationship back on track. He knew
that she had made a mistake. Xander had cornered him yesterday after
school and told him everything. How she had tried to stop it, but
Xander wouldn’t let her. Just like Buffy, he rationally knew this
wasn’t his fault, but he kept thinking that if he had talked to her last
night she would be here and safe.