LAUGHING MATTERS  

To impress his client the young businessman took him to an Italian restaurant. He picked up the men and ordered: " We'll have the giuseppe spomdalucci," he said.
"Sorry, sir," said the waitress that's the proprietor.
 

Question: What do you call a politician who has lost an election?
Answer: A Consultant.
 

Before you had to be able to speak at least five languages to get a good job in an European hotel, now you need to speak at least five to stay in one.
 

Opening the letter she said to her husband: "The electric board says that this is our final reminder. Isn't it wonderful that they are not going to bother us any more?"
 

Does coffee taste like mud if it's ground?
 

"What were you doing when the police arrived?" the judge asked the defendant.
"Waiting, sir."
"Waiting for what?"
"For money."
"Who was supposed to give you the money?"
"The man I was waiting for."
"Why was he going to give you the money?"
"For waiting."
"Enough of this!" exclaimed the judge.
"What do you do for a living?"
"I'm a waiter!"