Altus Praeses (ap)		Wintermute | Panamon | Mundrid DarkElf | Butcher
		versus
		Evil Inc. (-e.i-)		Phos | Col. Kurtz | Jedi Val | CityHunter Seizure | Inferno | The Saint

Both captains (Phos for e.i. and Wintermute for ap) take an ever-so-cute little soulless brigade, a sprinkling of fetch and dwarves, and massive melee. Both captains send armies to middle and north, and several minutes of trow annoyances ensue.

Artillery units are one-by-one kicked into mush on each side, and friendly fire from dwarves is all the rage. The northern e.i. flank sees an opportunity and attacks, but ap's middle arrives right as e.i. commits and e.i. loses badly.

With over half the game time remaining, e.i. needs a melee victory. They find one by pursuing an enemy flank relentlessly until it gives up and fights. The ap trow arrive too late to affect the outcome, and are forced to pull back.

Now, with both sides at about even strength, the rest of the game works itself out in a cacophany of "Get north!" and "Get west!" with liberal use of naughty words. Taking his cue from Abraham Lincoln, Phos inspires his troops:

Phos: ywee can jukk tsick ngee

This somewhat cryptic remark indicates that Phos's keyboard had flipped 180 degrees during the exciting melee fight. Translated, it reads, "We really need more sunlight."

With only seconds left, e.i. threatens to take all 6 flags, but ap holds them off of 2 of them. e.i. stops contesting, content to secure the 3 points for the win.

Game two finds us with the same captains and same unit choice, but the strategy stood on its head: this time, both captains send their flanks to the south. The flank armies engage in a battle as messy and confusing as any you'll see on Creep Last Man, and all that emerges from it are 2 e.i. trow (with 18 kills between them) and 1 ap trow (which has but 4 kills).

The rest of the game sees ap struggling to cope with their suffering trow health; and while a last minute attack across the bridge goes well, it allows e.i. to capture the sixth flag. Like in game 1, however, ap manages to recapture 2 flags during sudden death.

Both armies start in the east, but Phos sends the e.i. army entirely on the offensive, while Wintermute spreads the ap army thin. The e.i. melee don't even break stride as they plow into ap, and the ap trow returns only as the last ap zerk falls to the ground.

The e.i. attack leaves them with far superior numbers, but ap comes THIS close to snagging the ninth ball. Overrunning the ap archers, however, e.i. begins to accumulate balls, and go on to collect them all. For the third game straight, ap squeaks out a little hope by snagging a ball with their last spider. With e.i. up 25 to 5, it doesn't seem like much, but it makes all the difference by the end.

After the two main armies meet and mutually annihilate each other, both teams stand at just under 40%. However, Phos loses his connection as the game's host, so the match goes 12-0 to ap. They must win game 5 by 8 points to force a tiebreaker.

The middle battle in the river was well played on both parts, with a surprise water emergence from some ap thrall making the difference. Only one warrior survived this battle, and he was quickly cornered by a trio of thrall. So, the final standoffs at e.i.'s flag were battles of thrall against thrall - with a few journeymen thrown in for spice, of course.

ap's first wave of thrall was almost miraculously repelled by those of e.i., leaving 8 bitterly wounded undead to stand against the second wave--if you can call 6 thrall a 'wave', that is! The fewer thrall were healthy, however, and they took the e.i. flag with but one casualty.

e.i. was judged to have scored 2 points for their efforts in the river battle, which evened the score at 27-all. On to the tiebreaker, a terries game on Creep!

Two giant portions of each army met in the middle, where for almost ten minutes they glared at one another. On the fringes, ghols exchanged pus like pen pal letters, and little groups of warriors took and re-took flags.

Finally, an ap flank drew enough e.i. melee away from the river that Wintermute called for a full frontal assault in the middle. The pitched battle was decided when an ap wight, walking right past a trio of e.i. archers, became disturbed at the mess everyone was making and self-detonated in protest.

With most of e.i.'s melee frozen in place, ap cleaned up the middle. But with a mere 1:00 remaining, and e.i. ahead of them on three flags, it took some speed-walking by some warriors to contest an e.i. flag and keep it busy until the middle thrall could arrive and claim the flag, the game, and the match.

It will take the ap team a full week of showering to remove the stains they got when they reached way up their collective asses to pull this match off. After e.i. built a 25-5 lead, both e.i. and ap felt that the match was over. But the technology that giveth also taketh away, and a host drop in a tight game turned the tide of the scoring. Two great teams played six great games!

- Ananab Tilps