Heroes: the Army
"...When asked to join a tank crew, the dogface declined "When the bugler sounds retreat, I don't want any tank holding me back" (Old calvery joke about horses)..."
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1944 Front Line Humor
If you were normal coming out of combat, you weren't going in! (Like the war, much front line humor was grim.)
A disturbed soldier picked up every piece of paper he saw, looked at it, then tossed it away. Finally, the army psychiatrist declared him crazy (section 8) and handed him his medical discharge paper. The soldier took one look at it and yelled, "That's it! -- That's it!!
Up front with the infantry, everyone knows that there are just two kinds of people, the quick and the dead. You chances of surviving depend on how fast you get quick. One of our men broke the sound barrier before any plane did.
Up front, soldiers also know that there are only two ways out of the infantry, both horizontal.
When asked to join a tank crew, the dogface declined "When the bugler sounds retreat, I don't want any tank holding me back" (Old calvery joke about horses)
The retreating German soldiers broke all the wine bottles in the local shop, and shot holes in the wine cask.
When Willie saw what had happened, he angrily remarked to Joe, "Them dirty atrocity committing skunks."
When first under fire, a soldier started running. He ran, and ran, and ran, until he bumped into someone.
"Soldier, what are you supposed to do when you encounter and officer? Can't you see I'm a general?" He replied, "Man, I knew I ran far, but I didn't know I ran that far"
During his induction physical, a draftee complained that he was blind in one eye and couldn't see out of the other. "Don't worry about it." the doctor remarked, "We'll put you right up front where you won't miss a thing."
Some people say that you can I trust the army. A worried paratrooper making his first practice jump was told to first pull the main ripcord. If that doesn't work, then pull the emergency chute cord. And a jeep will be waiting to take you back to camp. Neither the main nor the emergency chute opened. On the way down the recruit thought, "I'll bet that damn jeep won't be waiting either.
If it weren't for the money (about a dollar a day), you'd quit the army.
----- Author Unknown
(Editor's note: Attempts were made throughout the text of the following story to place full names to the men listed in the story. For the most part, this is an educated guess and some names may very well be mistaken in their identy. The names were all taken from the division history book: With The 102d Infantry Division Through Germany, edited by Major Allen H. Mick. Using the text as a guide, associations with specific units were the basis for the name identifications. We are not attempting in any to rewrite the story. Any corrections are gladly welcomed.)
Interested in some background information?
Check out the related links below...United States Army, 102nd Infantry Division
History of the 102nd Infantry Division
Attack on Linnich, Flossdorf, Rurdorf - 29 Nov -- 4 Dec 1944
Gardelegen: April 13, 1945:
Massacre at the Isenschnibbe Barn
- The above story, "1944 Front Line Humor", was
originally published in the 102d Division "Ozark Notes", Vol. 51,
No. 4, July/Sept. 1999, pp. 6-7.
The story is re-printed here on World War II Stories -- In Their Own Words with the kind permission of the 102d Infantry Division Association, Ms. Hope Emerich, Historian. Our sincerest THANKS for the 102d Infantry Division Association allowing us to share some of their stories.
We would also like to extend our sincere THANKS to Mr. Edward L. Souder, former historian of Co. F., 405th Regiment. His collection of stories of the "Kitchen Histories Project" series entitled, Those Damn Doggies in F, were responsible for bringing the stories of the men of the 102nd Division to the forefront.
Original Story submitted on 1 July 2004.
Story added to website on 5 October 2004.
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