Jew: I'm Jewish.

Christian: 10 things I hate about Jew:
   	   He smells.
	   His Penis Is Wrong.
	   He's funnier than me.
	   He's more atractive than me.

Jew: That's only 4.

Christian: The other 6 were too rude for someone like me to say.

Jew: You're gay.

Christian: Yes, but whether that's a bad thing is yet to be decided.

Bazzu: Holy crap, I'm keeping up with current affairs.

Christian: HAHA! You watch Channel Five, you loser.

Bazzu: ISWYDT

Chistian: DYSWIDT?

Jew: N.

Christian: O.

Bazzu: My part is easy to write, because I know how my brain works.

Christian: You mean homosexually?

Jew: Not forgetting rape referencing, and stealing material from others.

Bazzu: I never steal material, except for silk.

Christian: I watched Philadelphia the other day.

Jew: oh?

Christian: It was a bit cheesy.

Bazzu: Grood one. gREAT AND GOOSFGHBNGH GCHJGFDJGHFH

[Everything Burns]

Dai: Dwi'n hoffi coffi. Beth amdanat ti?

Rhys: Dwi'n hoffi siocled.

Dai: I ti ffonodd home.

Rhys: YOU RUINED IT! YOU USED AN ENGLISH WORD! OUR SECRET CODE IS RUINED!

Dai: Oh

Rhys: Rydw i'n meddwl bod YOU yn JACKASS!

Guy from Jackass: /me burns everything.

Vinny Vicks: Im Vinny Vicks? I wish to inform you that 300 men a year get breast cancer?

Ted Vicks: I'm Ted Vicks! I wish to inform you that 300 men a year get stabbed in the chest by me.

[Ted Vicks: The Silent Killer]

Vinny Vicks: So guys, check your chest daily, for one day, it might be found on a rusty hook in a butchers.

Ted Vicks: Yes.

[Things burn]

Jason Donovan: I dare you to remember who the hell I am

Derren Brown: I take that dare, and will do it using my superb mind controls.

Jason Donovan: Who am I?

Derren Brown: I just don't know, you're so unknown. I hate myself, and thus will perform Russain Roulette on myself.

Jason Donovan: Take things too far, why not.

Derren Brown: Don't worry, I'll use blanks, BUT A BLANK CAN STILL KILL, SO WHY DON'T I JUST USE A REAL BULLET!? BECAUSE I DID THAT'S WHY!
	      AND I'M STILL THE GREATEST PERSON EVER! SO BOW THE FUCK DOWN TO ME WITH YOUR MIND.

David Blaine: Holy crap, I'm still alive, yet still unpopular. Derren, how did you manage to win people over?

Derren Brown: Somehow shotting myself in the head is more active than lying down for 44 day, perhaps that kept intrest.

David Blaine: :o(

Derren Brown: Also, you're American, and crap, so why not die now?

David Blaine: I can't die, I've tried everything.

Derren Brown: Try standing on a 10 storey high block of ice for 44 days.

[David Blaine does.]

Derren Brown: So did you die.

David Blaine: ...

[He would have said yes, were he not a corpse.]

Derren Brown: YES! I'M THE ONE AND ONLY GREAT PERSON! MY MIND POWERS ARE GREAT, AND NOT STUNTS, SO LOVE ME, BECAUSE I'M HONEST.

Alan Davies: I suffer from being on every single episode of IQ.

Alan Davies: Also, ever single episode of Jonathon Creek/

[BLOWS UP (5 balloons and a condom)]