".....and in other news, a 1980's red Porsche was reported stolen from Dr. Mario today. If anyone sees it, please report it immediately to the authorities. On this note, I would just like to say to whoever stole it...Why? What kind of a pathetic bastard resorts to stealing from such upstanding citizens as our beloved Dr. Mario? I hope they find him and hang him from his family jewels. Thank you. That is all for the six 'o' clock news."


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