Bert is Evil !
The OJ connection

Dear Sir,
Enclosed you will find a couple of snapshots of Bert conspiring with that infamous ex-football player, ex-moviestar, ex-husband and axe-murderer, O.J. Simpson. It's a well-kept secret that Bert was actually part of O.J.'s defense team during the first trial, and was also the only person in whom O.J. fully confided. Interestingly enough, photograph no. 2 was taken exactly ten minutes before the murders took place. (Also, did you know that yellow lint was found at the crime scene? It's true! It was exhibit no. 156a during the first trial). I know I am putting you and myself at risk for giving you all this information, but the truth must not be stopped. What are a few casualties for the good of man and muppetkind? Use this information well, and good luck.

respectfully,
Victor J. Zuylen

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