Bert is Evil!:
Intercepted E-mail Correspondence with Jeffrey Dahmer



 
The following is a series of E-mail correspondence between famed murderer/cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer and Bert. Contains violent language, reader's discretion is advised.



 

to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com) 


from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com) 


subject: Greetings! 


At 11:37 AM 11/26/94 -0800, Bert wrote:


Hello Jeffrey! Remember me.. Bert! We met once at the 


Evil People Convention. How's it been hanging?


I've been busy myself. Are you still doing a lot 


of carving? How's the meat this season?





Bert



to: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)


from: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)


subject: (re:)Greetings!


At 8:31 PM 11/27/94 -0700, Jeffrey Dahmer wrote:


Bert,


	Of course I remember you! You were the one who gave


me that recipe for Infant Soup. Thanks a million.


	I've been fine, the seasons been great, lots of fresh sweet meat.


I love kids. BTW if I remember right you have a Children related occupation.


Do you think you can source me some seven year olds?





Jeffrey



to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com) 


from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com) 


subject: Kids 


At 9:43 PM 11/27/94 -0800, Bert wrote:


Jeff,


Sure I can! How many do you need?


There are lots of kids here. (nice and plump)


I'll send you a sample soon.





Bert



to: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)


from: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)


subject: (re:)Kids


attachment: Butchering.txt


At 7:20 PM 11/30/94 -0700, Jeffrey Dahmer wrote:


Wow, the leg you sent me was excellent! I want more.


Can I get some by the bulk?


Also attached is a file on how to prepare the meat.


This way you can keep the meat in prime condition. 





Jeffrey



to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com) 


from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com) 


subject: Sweet Meat  


At 6:24 PM 11/31/94 -0800, Bert wrote:


Jeff,


Thanks for the text file you sent. It was very


informative. I'll make sure the next batch of 


meat I'll send over will be prepped this


way.





Bert



back