The crowd is a total sellout for the final day of Starrcade. The announcers for this final broadcast is Tony Schivone and Jim Ross with special commentary from "Nature Boy" Ric Flair. The National Anthem is done by R & B sensations Brandy & Monica (famous for their recent smash "The Boy Is Mine" as well as their individual works) with accompaniment from R. Kelly and the Harlem Boys Mass Choir. The tone is set as we are going to see the final round of the "Luke Peep Show" contest as well as the WCW World Title VS. Kissing "HBK's" Ass as Shawn Michaels defends the title against the leader of the nWo, "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan inside of a steel cage.
Dustin Rhodes VS. Curt "Mr. Perfect" Hennig
In this opening match, both men were determined to take this win as the son of Dusty Rhodes took on the son of Larry "The Ax" Hennig and member of Degeneration X. Ten minutes into this competative bout, Rhodes nails Hennig with a clothesline that knocks Hennig out of his boots. Rhodes then sets up for his bulldog but Hennig shrugs him off as Rhodes is in the air. Rhodes crashes hard down onto the canvas. Hennig then hooks Rhodes into his new variation of his "Perfect-plex". It is the "Perfect-buster" (a fisherman/brainbuster suplex combination) as he nails Rhodes with it and gets the three count to open up things at Starrcade.
Shane "The Franchise" Douglas VS. Bruno Samartino (ECW Title Match)
This bout saw two men from Pittsburgh, PA battle it out as ECW legend Douglas took on the "Living Legend" that is Bruno. This bout saw some extreme wrestling from Bruno as he turned the tables (excuse the pun) on Douglas as he bodyslammed Douglas over the top rope and through a table. He then went outside and threw Douglas back into the ring. Bruno now takes over as he starts his traditional flurry of kicks and punches to Douglas. Douglas stops this by raking the eyes. Douglas then fires Bruno into the ropes and goes for his belly to belly suplex but Bruno goes dead weight at the last second. Bruno takes advantage by throwing in a knee and lifting Douglas up in his backbreaker (the same one he used to win the WWF title years ago against the late "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers)!!! Then, Chris Candido and Bam Bam Bigelow comes in to break this up. They are tearing into Bruno when, suddenly, Flair leaves the broadcast booth to come down and helps Bruno drive off The Triple Threat. Bruno, wary of Flair, doesn't know what to make of this. Flair then reaches out to shake the hand of Samartino. Samartino returns the gesture and he and Flair leave together. When asked by Schivone why did he help Bruno, here was his response:
FLAIR: Bruno Samartino is like The Four Horsemen in that we are both classics. Guys like Douglas, Candido, and Bigelow know nothing about that. Douglas calls me old? Well, two old men just kicked the crap out of his Triple Threat!!! If that's what being old is all about, then I like it!!! WHOOOOO!!
Masa Chono & Tenzan VS. The Road Warriors (IWGP Tag Team Title Match)
The nWo Japan combo of Masa Chono and Tenzan came into this match against The Legion Of Doom. Chono and Tenzan brought Eric Bischoff down to ringside as a second. The Warriors countered by bringing DX's Chyna down as well!!! Bischoff protested this move but the ref lets her stay. This match saw the ariel ability and scientific brutality of Chono and Tenzan against the power and brute force of the Warriors. Seventeen minutes into this match, Tenzan went for his diving headbutt from the top rope on Hawk but missed as Hawk moved out of the way. Hawk makes the tag to Animal and Animal cleans house on both men!!! Animal executes a shoulderblock on Tenzan. He then throws Chono out of the ring and decks Bischoff as he climbed on the apron. The Warriors then went for the Doomsday Device on Tenzan but Chono makes the save by tackling Animal. Hawk still gets in his clothesline on Chono though. Animal then turns Tenzan upside-down into the "Tombstone" piledriver position with Hawk on the second rope. They "spike" Tenzan down and cover him. Bischoff comes in before the three count and the ref calls for a DQ. Chyna is in the ring and she has Bischoff. Eric is begging for mercy but Chyna gives the Warriors the thumbs up sign. Hawk goes to the top rope with Animal. Chyna lifts Bischoff on her shoulders and they execute a double-clothesline version of the "DD" on Bischoff!!! The crowd is going wild over this!! The Warriors didn't win the IWGP belts but had to feel like winners after this.
Tatsumi Fujinami VS. Dan "The Beast" Severn (IWGP Heavyweight Championship Match)
These two displayed the finest in technical expertise in this IWGP title bout. At about the eight minute mark, Fujinami hooked in his version of the "Scorpion Deathlock" but Severn does a push up. He looks like he's going to power out but Severn turns inside the hold, causing Fujinami to loose his balance and fall. Severn takes over this bout with Fujinami fighting him back. The match ends at the 14 minute mark when Severn reverses a whip by Fujinami. Severn backdrops Fujinami but holds onto his right arm. He quickly puts a "KeyLock" armhold on it and forces Fujinami to tap out for one of the rare times of his career. Severn has won the IWGP title. Both men show great respect for each other as they hug after the bout.
After this bout, Schivone, Ross and Flair are talking about the previous nights of Starrcade and the upcoming bouts when Jimi Hendricks' "Voodoo Child" plays, signaling the arrival of "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan and Dennis Rodman!!! They have a mic and they speak over a round of boos:
HOGAN: Well, you know something Rodzilla? Tonight is the night that "Hollywood" gets back what he deserves and that is the WCW World Heavyweight Championship from that slimy, faggoty, "HeartBreak Kid" 'Little' Shawn Michaels!!! By the way, who the hell does that tramp Madonna think she is anyway?!! Everyone knows that "The Worm" was the only real man she ever had!!
RODMAN: "Hollywood", I guess she couldn't handle a real man anymore so now she's got something more on the small to extra small range. Shawn Michaels, prepare to lose your gold tonight and wear your shower cap because you could be receiving a "golden" one tonight.
HOGAN: Yes, this is going to be the biggest night in the history of the nWo and "Hollywood" Hogan. Tonight,.....
He is cut off because they have a surprise visitor in the form of Madonna. She is wearing a white blouse with a white skirt, white pantyhose and white heel boots.
MADONNA: Rodman, you are a snunk. I mean, you want to claim that you were the only real man that I have ever had? Well, if you look at the list that I have been with honey, you are waaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy down on the toldem pole.
RODMAN:
Look baby, don't be embarrassed because I told the truth (he says sarcastically).
MADONNA: Well, it really doesn't matter because you and "Hollywood" are in for a big surprise.
RODMAN: What kind baby? (He says this in an arrogant tone while Hogan watches and snickers).
Then, from the back, Chyna comes out and throws powder into the eyes of "Hollywood" Hogan!!! Rodman is confused by the action going on right now. This gives Madonna time for a quick kick in the nuts on Rodman. Chyna, meanwhile, has bodyslammed Hogan on the floor!!! Then, Shawn Michaels comes out and superkicks Hogan down. He then takes the mic and has this to say:
MICHAELS: Hey, St. Louis!!! I have a little treat for you and a visual aid for "Hollywood" Hogan.
With that, Michaels picks up Rodman to his knees and holds his arms with the help of Chyna. He then drags him over to Madonna and demands an apology from him to her. Rodman, of course, refuses and has a few choice words for all three of them. Then, Madonna says this:
MADONNA: Hey Shawn. Why don't we....(she then whispers to both Michaels and Chyna. They both have big smiles on their faces.).
Michaels and Chyna still hold onto Rodman while Madonna turns around and lifts up her dress to reveal her "world-famous" ass!!! She doesn't have any panties on by the way. She bends over and Michaels and Chyna force Rodman to kiss her ass!!! Madonna then turns around and slaps Rodman. Rodman goes back down to the floor (as he is still hurting from getting kicked in the nuts by Madonna). Michaels has the mic again:
MICHAELS: Hogan!!! See ya later tonight!!!
The threesome leave Rodman hurting and humiliated and Hogan just coming to his senses.
The Land Of The Giants VS. The Steiner Bros. (No DQ)
In this grudge match, the newly heel Steiner Bros. took on the 1,030 pound duo of Andre The Giant and Paul "The Giant" Wright in a no DQ bout. The Steiners did hold their own against the two behemoths but The Giants proved to be too much as they had vengence on their minds as well. Ten minutes into this encounter, Scott Steiner performed an incredible "T-Bone" suplex on Paul but injured his back doing so. Paul still had the presence to make the tag to Andre. Andre came in and, taking a page from his partner, executes a chokeslam on Scott!! Rick Steiner came in but Andre stopped him with his size 24 boot to the face. As Andre squashed Rick, Paul acended to the top rope and executed a "Frog Splash" on Scott, breaking down the ring!!! This brought the crowd to its feet. Paul covered Scott for an easy three count as The Land Of The Giants continued their winning ways.
Lex Luger VS. Magnum TA
In this match, we have the two time former NWA United States Champion (Magnum) against the former four time NWA United States Champion (Luger). This was a competative bout that saw Luger work a good match for the first time in a long while. Magnum kept Luger off balance with dropkicks and the use of armdrags to keep Luger grounded. Luger, of course, used power to take the advantage as well as use some surprising wrestling skills. The match reached its climax when Luger nailed his powerslam on Magnum. He then goes for his "Human Torture Rack" backbreaker but Magnum slips behind him as he is being lifted up and hooks in his belly to belly suplex. As Magnum covers, Shane "The Franchise" Douglas (with Chris Candido and Bamm Bamm Bigelow in tow) comes in and attacks Magnum. The ref DQ's Luger and Magnum will win the match but that was secondary right now. Luger makes it to his feet and helps Magnum. Chris Benoit (who has been an ally to Magnum in my past stories and is a member of The WolfPack with Luger) comes down to help as well. It is Luger VS. Bigelow, Candido VS. Benoit and Douglas VS. Magnum (or, in the case of those two, student VS. teacher as these two do share a past). The face off with Douglas and Magnum is especially fiece because of past comments that Douglas had made towards his former friend and mentor. Referees come in and manage to seperate the other combatants but can't break up Douglas and Magnum!!! Finally, Luger, Benoit, Bigelow and Candido seperate their friends from each other with both men screaming angry curses and words at each other. It seems that Magnum and Douglas are on a collision course with the other now and there is no turning back.
During the chaos, it is announced that the winner of the "Luke Peep Show" will now be announced at the Starrcade: Deadly Unions - AfterParty at the Hilton Hotel in town. The winner will get a trophy for her efforts. The home audience will find out the winner the next night on WCW Nitro and WWF RAW respectively. The live audience are invited to attend the party for free so long as they keep their ticket stub as proof of their attendence. They will party with the superstars of pro wrestling.
Hunter Hearst Helmsley VS. "Buff" Bagwell
This is a rematch from a match they had in Tokyo, Japan at "Kamakasi" (see my Shawn Michaels VS. Jushin Liger story). This time, Triple H seems to be the crowd favorite here as both men put on a classic that equaled or surpassed their original encounter. The match ended when Bagwell went for his "Blockbuster" neckbreaker but Triple H moved out of the way. Triple H then nails Bagwell with his patened flying knee to the face. He presses his advantage with clotheslines and punches but Bagwell stops the momentum with a rake of the face. Bagwell then throws Triple H into the corner and tries to knee him but Triple H moves out of the way. Bagwell has injured his knee. Triple H takes advantage and puts the "Pedigree" on Bagwell for the pin!!! Triple H avenges his loss to Bagwell in Japan with a win here at Starrcade.
Sable VS. Jacqueline (WCW Ladies Title Match)
Both women got great ovations here (I suspect due to the "action" that they gave them earlier). These two long time rivals surprisingly slapped hands out of respect but make no mistake, they went at it and it wasn't no catfight either!! Fourteen minutes into the bout, Jacqueline took over with a superplex from the very top rope. Jacqueline then signals for her DDT as she feels this match is over. As she hooks the front facelock however, Sable quickly backdrops her. Jacqueline is not seriously hurt and rushes in on Sable. This proves to be a big mistake as Sable lifts Jacqueline into the air, catches her head as she's up there, and delivers a "Stone Cold Stunner" on Jacqueline!!! Sable covers for the three count and wins the WCW Ladies Title. A.S., Inc. have now traded two titles for three (having loss the NWA TV and Tag Team Titles but retaining the WWF Intercontiental and NWA World Titles and now gaining the WCW Ladies belt).
Kane VS. Nikita Koloff VS. Bill Goldberg (NWA United States Title Match/Triple Threat Rules)
It is announced that this match (as well as the main event) will now be "Hell In A Cell" matches!!! This bout will still be under Triple Threat Rules. The three started out tentative at first but then the brutality began in earnest. All three men came very close on several occassions to winning this bout. The man taking the brunt of this match was Kane himself. Although the champ, he didn't have the experience of Koloff nor the athletic and violent nature of Goldberg. The most unusual aspect of the match saw Goldberg and Nikita perform their finishers on Kane at the same time!!! At the same moment that Goldberg "speared" Kane, Nikita hit Kane with his "Russian Sickle" clothesline!!! Kane was rocked. Nikita then tried to "Sickle" Goldberg but Goldberg sidestepped him and "speared" him as well. He then executed the "Jackhammer" suplex on Kane. Goldberg gets the three count at the fifteen minute mark as he regains the NWA United States Title.
MAIN EVENT TIME
The ring announcer is HOWARD FINKLE!!!
FINKLE: Ladies and gentlemen!!! This contest is for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship and it will be contested inside of the "Hell In A Cell" steel cage!!!
The music of "Hollywood" Hogan plays!!!
FINKLE: Coming down the aisle. From Hollywood, CA. He weighs 275 pounds. "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan!!!
Hogan comes out alone for this one (for now anyway). He seems calm and confident for a guy that got jumped earlier tonight. He does his usual bragging as he goes to the ring among a chorus of boos. He enters the "Cell" and then enters the ring. He has a look that says "what have I got myself into now." He rips off his shirt and awaits Shawn Michaels.
FINKLE: His opponent (the DX's part that says "Are you ready?" blares out but instead of the DX theme, out plays "Sexy Boy"!!! The crowd marks out for this!!!), is from San Antonio, TX. He weighs in at 228 pounds. The WCW World Heavyweight Champion, "The HeartBreak Kid" Shawn Michaels!!!
Michaels comes out with a red outfit. He gets a thunderous ovation from the crowd!!! He does his usual struting and dancing on his way to the ring. He then takes off his extra gear outside of the cage and hands the timekeeper the championship belt as he knows he is in for a fight here.
The referee is in the ring but he will only count the pin or submission. Michaels enters the "Cell" and then the ring. He goes toward the center as does Hogan. The two jawjack at each other as there is some heated words being exchanged. Hogan looks as if he's going back but he tries to get in a sucker punch on Michaels. Michaels ducks it and stings him with three quick left jabs followed by a big right hand that backs Hogan up into a corner. Shawn whips Hogan into a corner but Hogan reverses the whip. He follows Shawn in with a clothesline. Shawn falls to the ground. Hogan then takes off his weightlifting belt and begins to whip Shawn with it. He gets in about eight licks with it. He then whips Shawn into the ropes and clotheslines him with the belt. He then goes down on his knees and peppers him with right hands. Hogan now picks up Michaels and bodyslams him. He then goes for an elbowdrop but misses. He tries it again but misses again. He goes for it a third time but misses. Michaels gets up on the third attempt, hits the ropes and gets in a flying clothesline on Hogan. Hogan goes to the outside of the ring but he can't go far as he is still trapped inside the cell.
Michaels goes outside after Hogan. He catches Hogan with a short right to the back of the head. He then goes for a whip into the steel steps but Hogan reverses it and Michaels goes into the steel steps shoulder-first. Hogan follows up his advantage with kicks and stomps to Michaels. He then picks up Michaels, holds out an arm and boots him in the stomach and ribs. Hogan now has the top part of the steel steps and uses them as a battering ram as he runs right into Michaels. This doesn't look good for Michaels as Hogan has taken command of this match. Hogan then rams Michaels' head into the steel cage. This opens up a cut on the forehead of Michaels. Hogan goes for that cut with rights to the head. He then throws Michaels back into the ring. Hogan then hiptosses Michaels high into the air. Michaels lands hard on his back. Hogan then whips Michaels into a corner and Michaels flips upside down onto the top turnbuckle. Hogan then goes up and performs a back suplex from the top turnbuckle that rocks Michaels but also hurts Hogan as well.
Hogan manages to get over to Michaels and cover him. Hogan gets a close two count. Hogan then goes to the outside and finds a steel chair from under the ring. Hogan then waits for Michaels to get up somewhat and he nails Michaels in the back with the chair. Hogan has the chair in his hands as Michaels crawls over to him. Hogan is laughing it up thinking things are well in hand. He raises the chair for another hit but Michaels uses Hogan's tights and leverages him into the corner headfirst into his own chair!!! Hogan is stunned but goes back to the attack with a clothesline but misses. Michaels hits his flying forearm and does his traditional knipup with Hogan down!!! Michaels then goes to the outside and finds a table. He brings it into the ring and sets it up in the middle. He then takes Hogan and knocks him onto the table. Michaels then goes to the top rope with the steel chair in hand and (using the chair like an elbowpad) jumps off of the top rope with an elbowsmash (or should that be elbow-chairsmash?) into the chest of Hogan. Hogan is really hurting from the blow as they went through the table. Michaels raises his hands signaling that it is over. He quickly moves the debris out of the way and sets up for his "Sweet Chin Music" superkick. He waits for a stunned Hogan to get up and goes for it. Hogan ducks it and tries to counter with a clothesline but Michaels ducks it. Hogan, however, does level the ref with the clothesline meant for Michaels!!! The ref is on the outside. Hogan then nails Michaels with a clothesline. Hogan then executes the legdrop on Michaels. Seeing that the ref is only starting to come around, Hogan executes his legdrop about five more times on Michaels. After the fifth one, Hogan covers Michaels strong with the ref slowly coming over. After about 10 seconds, the ref is in position. He counts 1.......2.......Michaels kicks out at the last second!!! Hogan is now pissed!!!
Hogan then signals for the nWo. All of them come out in the form of Scott Norton, "Buff" Bagwell, Rick & Scott Steiner, Jake "The Snake" Roberts, Raven, Bryan Adams, Vincent and Eric Bischoff. As the get up to the cage however, they have a surprise waiting as DX, The WolfPack, The Four Horsemen (including Ric Flair who left the broadcast booth to join them) and Ass Whippers, Inc. come out of the crowd and jump the nWo!!! It is the above mentioned members of the nWo against DX(Rude, Hennig, Savage, Hall, Nash, Syxx, Helmsley), The WolfPack (UT, Sting, Benoit, Luger, Vader), The Horsemen (Flair, Anderson, Blanchard, Windham) and Ass Whippers, Inc. (Brody, Hansen, Saturn, TAZ). The nWo is sorely outnumbered here!!! Michaels is just getting up from the five legdrops as Hogan is looking at the chaos on the outside. Then, from under the ring, comes "Stone Cold" Steve Austin!!! He is trading words with Hogan. From behind Hogan comes Sable as she waits for Hogan to turn around. When Hogan does, Sable does her version of "SCM" on Hogan. Hogan is not out but he is staggered. Austin quickly comes in and "Stuns" Hogan!!! Michaels, seeing that he has the opportunity, makes his way over and covers Hogan. The ref makes it back around (Sable and Austin have gone back under the ring) and counts down Hogan as Shawn has retained the WCW World Title!!!
Meanwhile, The Land Of The Giants have made their way down. They allow members of DX, WP, and A.S., Inc. to go in as they stood guard at the door. Triple H goes under the ring and pulls out a bag with leather straps!!! But, first things first, as Michaels "moons" the world awaiting for Hogan to kiss his ass. A strange team of Austin, Flair, Sting and Savage hold Hogan and force him to kiss it!!! Michaels even let some gas pass as Hogan was kissing!!! Michaels pulls his britches up and Triple H has handed a belt to each wrestler and woman inside the cage (Chyna and Sable have joined in as well).
MICHAELS: Well, now that "Hollywood" Hogan has kissed my ass, it is now time to open the woodshed!!!
Rude and Luger handcuff Hogan facefirst into the cage with his arms streched out. They then pull Hogan's tights down just enough to expose his "moon" to the world. Then, one by one, each person inside (that's a total of 22 people) took their straps and whipped Hogan's ass!!! Hogan was screaming in agony as there was nothing that the nWo nor he could do. The nWo tried to get in but The Giants made sure that they wouldn't. Each person got to do 10 lashes a piece (that's a total of 210 lashes!!). As the bruises began to show up, Triple H poured alcholol on the wounds, making them hurt even more!!! Bret Hart, DDP, The Road Warriors, Jesse "The Body" Ventura, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, and Sid Vicious have joined in on the fun as they got to lash the strap to Hogan's backside as well. Afterwards, they let Hogan loose as Hogan falls to the floor. The Giants finally let the nWo inside. The nWo quickly gather up Hogan and beat a hasty retreat, swearing revenge as they left. Meanwhile, the tune of "Once In A Lifetime" blares over the speakers as the crowd cheers the men in the ring. Friends, enemies, whatever, stood in the ring together for one moment as fans took pictures (kind of like a big family portrait). Even the women that were in the "LPS" came out to pose (with the obvious exception of Ms. Liz as she is with the nWo). The wrestlers all pose together as Starrcade goes off of the air in memorable fashion.