Shirt…
…Buys One, Gets One Freema
Shirt had been collecting signatures in his ‘Companions’ book for almost fifteen years, and had almost a complete set of TV and Large Endings’ companions. However, there were two main omissions in the TV companions – Freema Agyeman and Karen Gillan. Shirt had met both ladies at DVD signings (see S…Smith and Jones and S…The Eleventh Shower), but due to the stringent security guards had been unable to get the sacred tome signed by them.
Then Memorabilia London announced their star guest – Ms. Agyeman – making her premiere (non-DVD) signing appearance, so Shirt decided to attend The Access Centre in London’s Docklands to fill one gap. Using his usual route to Barking, Shirt exited the Jubilee Line a stop earlier at Canning Town and forced his way up to the DLR platforms though a gigantic number of cosplayers attending the sister event ‘MCM Expo’, at the same venue. This was to be the UK's biggest annual cosplay meet-up, and Shirt found himself crushed between comic book, computer game, film and TV characters. Managing to cram onto the first train, he travelled the three stops to the venue, where he managed to exit swiftly and place some distance between himself and the rampaging horde.
Entering the Centre, Shirt was confused at the lack of signs explaining where he needed to buy a ticket. Asking three different stewards, he received three different answers, and nearly joined the long queue which turned out to be consisting of people who had pre-booked. Finally he was directed to the payment booth, where he joined a short queue to pay. Having been given a ticket for entry and the back of his hand having been hand-stamped, Shirt was directed to a short queue outside one of the two entrances to the Memorabilia exhibition hall.
Ten minutes later, the pre-payers having had their hands stamped, their queue was joined on the back of Shirt’s.
This caused great consternation from fans at the front of the former pre-pay queue.
“We’ve been here since 6.30am”, they moaned, with a fan in a Captain Jack coat being particularly vocal.
Shirt simply stood there, feeling smug that he would get in before them.
Eventually the stewards, not wanting violence, relented, and the pre-pay queue was broken off the back of the paid-on-the-day queue, and moved to the other entrance to the hall.
At 9.30am, the doors were opened, and the pre-pay queue began filing in. When the moaners were inside, the other queue was also allowed to enter alongside.
Inside there was another lack of signs, but Shirt knew that he needed an autograph voucher to meet Freema, and so sought out the desk selling them, which was being staffed by one stressed steward. A medium length queue had formed, which moved slowly whilst fans decided how many vouchers they needed, and the steward added up how much they owed.
The fan two places in front of Shirt had a question –
“Will she sign ‘Freema Agyeman’ or just ‘Freema’ ? It’s just that I’ve got her outside events and she’s just signed ‘Freema’, so I don’t want her autograph unless it’s her full name”.
Rather than telling the fan to go away, the steward agreed that he could come back and get a refund on his autograph vouchers, if before Freema signed he confirmed that she would not be signing her surname.
Finally reaching the front, Shirt paid for two autograph vouchers for Freema and one for Matt Frewer (who appeared as Holmes in four US TV Movies in the 2000’s).
Vouchers safely in his pocket, Shirt made his way to the currently short queue for Freema, which others kept joining before being told that they needed to get the voucher first.
He then spent the fifteen minutes until Freema was due to start signing, discussing the disorganisation with the man behind him who works for Seventh Galaxy and the organisers of Collectormania, and whom had nothing to do with that day’s event.
There was a no photographs sign, but the one at the next table (for Eve Myles) confusingly spoke about photographs being £5 extra. However, a steward then came down the queue, explaining that Eve and Kai Owen were charging £5 for the 10x8s on their tables, whilst Freema’s were free with an autograph.
At 10am, Ms. Agyeman arrived and looked around at the gathering fans. Five minutes later, and the queue began to move, with Freema seeming quite animated. Ten minutes later and Shirt was in front of the signing table and handing over his autograph vouchers. First up was the mythical ‘Companions’ book, then a photo that he had agreed to get for Dufus. One minute later, with two signed and dedicated items, Shirt moved off, by-passing Eve and Kai. However, whilst Freema had been signing, two other guests from ‘Torchwood: Miracle Day’ had sat down. Shirt therefore decided to use the autograph voucher that he had intended to use for Matt Frewer to meet the lovely Alexa Havins, who played new TW-team member, Esther Drummond, whom Shirt had taken a shine to.
As Shirt approached, she shot out her hand to shake his –
“Hi, I’m Alexa”, she said.
“I’m Shirt”, stuttered Shirt, picking up a publicity still of Esther for Alexa to sign.
Photograph signed, and Shirt stuttered his goodbyes, by-passing Arlene Tur, who had played Dr. Vera Juarez in ‘TW:MD’.
He then waited until the queue for vouchers went down, before joining it to get a replacement voucher for Matt Frewer, which he then proceeded to misplace for several minutes. Finally finding the voucher, and there being no queue for Mr. Frewer, he walked up, giving his voucher to the steward, and proffering a DVD cover of “The Hound of the Baskervilles” for Matt to sign. Cover signed, Shirt asked for a photograph. Unfortunately, due to Matt participating in a photo-shoot later that day, Shirt was only able to take a quick photo of Matt signing the cover, and was unable to appear in the photo also.
Shirt then decided to look at the very limited number of stalls in the hall, the majority of retailers being in the Expo next door, which was not open to Memorabilia ticket-holders until 1pm. This completed, Shirt finding nothing that he wanted to buy, he decided to go for a long lunch, returning in time to be able to go into Expo as soon as it was opened to non-Expo ticket holders and to get signatures from ‘Spirit Sinema’ guests who would not be signing until 2pm.
Catching the DLR back to Canning Town, Shirt then proceeded to go on a long walk, which ended with him reaching The What Shop. As ever, Helen A greeted him like an old friend, but Shirt found nothing that he wanted to buy. Catching a bus back, having bought some food from a local supermarket, he found himself back at the Access Centre, and on entering the hall (having persuaded the payment booth to re-stamp his disappearing handstamp) found that the linkway between the two events was open, even though it was only 12.45pm.
Expo was much busier than Memorabilia, and Shirt had to push his way around, through more large groups of cosplayers, many holding signs offering ‘Free Hugs’. Then, more by luck than good judgement, he stumbled on the signing area, and found that they two people he wanted – Agam Darshi and Jonathan Young from ‘Sanctuary’ – were signing. Paying for two more autograph vouchers, Shirt joined the queue and twenty minutes later was handing over the vouchers and picking up two photographs (the fan in front taking the last of the Jonathan Young images that Shirt preferred). Jonathan happily signed Shirt’s second favourite image of Nikola Tesla, and he moved on to Agam, who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying herself despite one of the offered images featuring her in her bra. Shirt’s second photo signed, and he moved off to push through the rest of the event, passing Justin Bruening (from the new ‘Knight Rider’ who was also ‘Mr. Alexa Havins’) who was also signing. Perusing the larger number of staff, he finally found something that he wanted to buy – four publicity postcards for “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” and a key-ring containing a film cell from the first film.
Returning to Memorabilia, Shirt was just in time for ‘Spirit Sinema’s signing for the launch of the second CD in their audio sitcom “Fight for the Remote”. Picking up a copy, Shirt paid what he took to be a steward. However, when he signed the CD cover also, he realised that he was one of the guest stars. The cover was then passed to Ayesha Antoine, who appeared in Nu Who Series 4 episode “Midnight”. Having got her to sign the cover, Shirt offered his Series 4 poster, which Ayesha also signed. Having got a second guest star to sign the cover, Shirt moved off, and having gathered all his items together, left the hall for the last time.
However, his plans for the day were not yet at an end. Making his way to Tottenham Court Road, Shirt spent time in Naughty Asteroid, buying the newly-released ‘Sixth Doctor’s Coat’ T-shirt. He then made his way to the nearby Donmar Warehouse, and the exit where he had met Christopher Eccleston (see S…Has a Fantastic Afternoon), as he was aware that the afternoon matinee of John Osborne’s “Inadmissible Evidence”, co-starring a certain Ms. Gillan was just coming to an end.
A female fan was already waiting there, and it seemed that she had the problem of there being two likely exit doors for actors covered as her husband was stationed at the other with his mobile.
Forced chatting took place, then the fan’s phone burst into life. Fan ran full-tilt through alley towards the theatre’s front door, closely followed by Shirt.
On arrival, it turned out to be a false alarm, as husband’s phone had malfunctioned.
A quick return to the back door, more stilted conversation, then finally the phone rang again.
Run – Take Two found them back at the front door and entering the foyer where the lovely Karen was happily signing for several fans, but firmly telling one that she was signing only one item per person.
Having completed signing for the small group already there, it was time for female fan and her husband, then it was Shirt’s turn.
“Is to Shirt ?”, asked the beautiful Ms. Gillan, before signing just underneath Freema.
Closing his book, Shirt made his way out of the foyer, just overhearing another fan asking Karen for a photo with her, which she seemed happy to do. Shirt considered turning round to see if he could get a photo too, but decided to not hold Karen up any longer during her between-show break.
Making his way back to Waterloo, Shirt flicked through the precious tome, which was now almost complete – now, how could he meet Kylie Minogue ?
[PL]