WHY LORD
So many times i have knelt and prayed,
why have you taken her at such a young age?
So many times i have asked the lord,
Is she In heaven and not of this world?
So many times Ihave asked myself,
what will I do now that she has left?
So many times I have cried and cried,
why have you gone? why have you died?

LIFE AND DEATH
I got a phone call one day,my mom was very sick,
her life was slipping away, like the end of a wick
I stayed with her so very long,two weeks or more,
loving her and nursing her,always pacing the floor
Then one day her eyes flew open, she was better,
so very weak and thin, light as a feather.
She's going home today, me to, so I will pack,
I wont be gone for long,I promise I'll be back.
Why did I leave that day, she begged me to stay,
I told you I'd be back, mom,In another day.
The tickets In my hand, I'm on my way,
SHE DIED BEFORE I GOT THERE,
ON A WARM DAY IN MAY.
(i miss you mom)

BEAUTY
The perfect arch of a rainbow
the many colors so bright.
The beautiful site of a sunrise
when its just getting light.
The twinkling of the stars
in the still of the night.
The sun shinning on the river
sparkling and quite.
But the most beautiful thing I've ever seen,
Is the love of a mother, flowing like a stream.

I DIDN'T LISTEN
For months you tried to prepare me,
you knew that you were dying.
But I would't listen,
now I'm always crying.
For days you tried to tell me,
you knew you didnt have long.
but I would't listen,
and now your gone.
For hours you tried to show me,
you knew the time was near,
but I would't listen,
now shock has dried my tear.
For minutes you tried to hold me,
you knew it was time to part.
but it's to late to listen,
now guilt holds my heart.

MOM
my mom was a blessing
so sweet and giving,
she raised nine kids
her life was worth living.
my mom was so beautiful
in more ways then one,
she taught us good values
and to have fun.
my mom was a wife, mother,
and friend,
arms always open
with comfort, to mend.
my mom was a grandmother,
great grandmother too,
she showered them with hugs
her love was brand new.
my mom was my life
but now shes not here,
i yearn for her voice
saying, " its alright dear."

TO MY HUSBAND
I know you want to ease the pain
you try so very hard,
I dont make it easy
I'm always on my guard.
I know I seem to push you away
but its a known fact,
my emotions are crazy
I dont know how to act.
I know you think I shut you out
I dont mean to, but its true,
but if I let you in
you'd be like me, forever blue.
I know you think I dont care,
about your feeling and pain.
I'm just wrapped in my own tears
death is to blame.
I know you feel like giving up
and going your own way.
I need your love more than ever,
I'm begging you to stay.

I CAN HEAR YOU
when you wake at night
and feel so empty,
just talk to me.
when every second of every day
is thoughts of me,
just talk to me.
when you feel so lonley
and there's no one,
just talk to me.
when the pain inside
seems to never leave,
just talk to me.
when you feel you cant cope anymore
and want to walk beside me,
just talk to me.
AS LONG AS YOU LIVE
I TOO, SHALL LIVE,
FOR, I AM PART OF YOU
IN YOUR MEMORIES, ALWAYS

ADDICTION
liquor on my breath
everyday and everynight,
i cant seem to stop,
i've tried with all my might.
the glass is always there
waiting to be filled,
i only need one drink
the pain would be stilled.
if i didnt have a drink each day
i would never fall asleep,
how would i spend my days?
i would be buried , far beneath.
one drink is all i need today,
just a sip of wine,
when i awake, the day is gone,
thats how i spend my time.
if i didnt feel so deep in my heart,
that pain is all thats left.
i would'nt always have
liquor on my breath.

MY SISTER
I've caused so much pain
there's been many fight's,
I'm so ashamed of hurting you
I've cried alot of nights.
I'm glad you forgave me
so happy to have you back,
I'll never hurt you again
that's a blood pact.
You've been my best friend
for alot of years,
we've laughed and danced
and had bottle's of beers.
I'm here if you need me
to have fun, or just talk,
to be happy, or sad,
we can take a long walk.
I'm proud your my sister
thank you, for being there,
this poem is dedicated
to you, "lynn lair."

MIXED EMOTINS
I've lost control,
my emotions are astray.
I cant stop crying,
please make it go away.
the depression is heavy,
pain feels my heart.
there's no room for another,
I'm breaking apart.
I'm angry at my mom,
for leaving me this way.
oh, help me, I'm scared,
I dont want to stay.
what will i do with my life,
when I'm overwhelmed with saddness,
It's time to come home now, mom
then i will be filled with happiness.

MY SPECIAL WISH
If i had three wishes,
i know what one would be.
i would wish my mom was here
to spend her life with me.
If i had three wishes,
i know what two would be
i would wish to part the clouds
her beauty for all to see.
if i had three wishes,
i know what three would be
i would wish to open heaven
for i would have the key.
but i only have one special wish
guess, what that would be.
i would wish my mom came home
to spend her life with me.

FRIEND
As sarah brings her broken doll,
with tears, to mend.
i brought my broken heart to mom
because she was my friend.
As andy brings his football,
with anger, to be aired.
i brought my pain to mom
because she always cared.
as howard brings me comfort,
with love in his eyes
i brought my tears to mom
because she knows i cry.
as i bring my pain and suffering
which never seems to end,
i also bring my love to mom
because she was my friend.

HEATHER AND MEAGAN
two pretty little girls born on a cold
day in december,
how i loved to hold them
yes, i still remember.
with hair so soft and
pretty little curls,
playing dress up
with mom's pearls.
taking a bath with
lots of bubbles,
what a mess with
all the puddles.
playing in the yard with
all brothers friends,
meagan coms in crying
with a knee, i need to mend.
how i loved to watch them
playing tea together,
one seemed to play the mom
it was always heather.
i could never keep them away
from the muddy water,
to get that out of those curls
oh, what a bother.

SARAH
her birth was very difficult
the tiny body so still,
the memory so vivid
it doesnt seem real.
with tubes sticking everywhere
all i do is cry,
machines going off
i'm afraid she's going to die.
its been three months
she's finally coming home,
nurses always have her
i feel so alone.
its been a year now
nurses no longer here,
she's laughing, and learning
i dont shed a single tear.
she's ten years old now
pretty as a bright sunny day,
she's always smiling
happy and gay.

MY ANGEL
an angel sits beside me
softly touching my hand,
moonlight on the beach
running fingers thru the sand.
an angel gracefully dancing
hair flowing aroung her face,
her dress is made of the purest silk
adorned with pearls and lace.
an angel with the greatest beauty
her smile melts my heart,
when i look upon her face
i know we'll never part.
an angel that comforts me
caresses and holds me tight,
she knows when i'm lonely
she loves me thru the night.
an angel that i love to watch
with wings widly spread,
gently floating in the sky
glowing softly around her head.
an angel thats always happy
an i'm tired of feeling blue,
i want to laugh and sing
i want to be an angel too.

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